PERSONAL TRAINER THAT'S NOT SO PERSONAL

Ahmee2034
Ahmee2034 Posts: 1,330 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
OK, so, I hired a personal trainer. I'm about 60 pounds from my goal weight. I want to do this right this time! Anyway, I TOTALLY get the "kick my *kitten* Jillian Michaels" concept. I actually need that sometimes, we all do. But, my question is, my personal trainer seems to be intentionally trying to make it harder on me than it should be. I mean, I've checked with a few people, one of whom has actually run in the Boston Marathon and is a FREAK of a health nut, and she said that there is no way I should be hurting to the point of tears after over a week since my session. Then, I went to my last session, in pain and hardly able to move, hoping that she would help me with exercises that would help me work through the pain, stretching, yoga, etc. Anything to give me guidance. Well, she went off on me because I hadn't called her earlier to cancel my session, which I WASN'T there to cancel my session anyway, I was there to workout. She went into this tirade telling me that another person had cancelled their session for later that evening and that she doesn't understand my mindset that I would show up to workout hurting!!! People in the gym were staring at us! Then she says, "this is a professional relationship. I don't know WHAT is in your mind!" What should I do? I am still working out, running, etc. I'm STILL in pain OVER a week later...Where did I go wrong?
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Replies

  • ShannonMpls
    ShannonMpls Posts: 1,936 Member
    Find a new trainer.

    To be fair, after my first sessions with my trainer, I was sore for a long time. But there is a difference between soreness and pain. I'd find a trainer who I felt I could communicate better. I'd definitely not stick with someone who yells at me.
  • M_Garner
    M_Garner Posts: 23 Member
    You pay money for someone to help you get to where you need to be; not belittle you or hurt you. If I were you, I would fire her and find someone with someone else. You do not want to go through everyday with her having it be like that. FInd someone else. :)
  • BigDougie1211
    BigDougie1211 Posts: 3,531 Member
    Tell her politely but firmly hat you'd like to terminate said professional relationship and get a refund for any sessions paid in advance.
    If she's less than forthcoming with the funds, continue to explain that, while you're aware that certain level of ache and discomfort is normal, you believe you may have sustained an injury under her guidance.
    Be polite, respectful but be assertive. Then go get a trainer who suits you.
  • EmmieBaby
    EmmieBaby Posts: 1,235 Member
    Tell her politely but firmly hat you'd like to terminate said professional relationship and get a refund for any sessions paid in advance.
    If she's less than forthcoming with the funds, continue to explain that, while you're aware that certain level of ache and discomfort is normal, you believe you may have sustained an injury under her guidance.
    Be polite, respectful but be assertive. Then go get a trainer who suits you.

    ^^^ agree
  • kizzyb1977
    kizzyb1977 Posts: 199 Member
    Nobody has any right to speak to you this way!!

    Absolutely find a new trainer!
  • FFfitgirl
    FFfitgirl Posts: 369 Member
    Talk to the club manger and see if you can start over witha different trainer, without getting charged
  • bjune5
    bjune5 Posts: 70 Member
    She is so fired.
    On to the next.
  • LuvtheCubs
    LuvtheCubs Posts: 161 Member
    First, fire her. Second go to club manager. Muscle soreness is fine for a few days. If you are in this much pain you may have hurt yourself. Did you see a doctor? Be your own advocate here and tell the trainer to go pound sand. She sucks.
  • Jxnsmma
    Jxnsmma Posts: 919 Member
    punch her in the throat and find another trainer.
  • Quattrone21
    Quattrone21 Posts: 49
    Tell her to beat it... Trainers are there to help you and motivate you , not hurt you. They should push you to do a little more then you want but not to the point where it hurts a week later.
  • RachelMMtz
    RachelMMtz Posts: 4
    LOL @JXNSMMA.... oh man I was thinking the same thing!
  • MrsK20141004
    MrsK20141004 Posts: 489 Member
    Shes right it is a professional relationship and if she is unable to treat you with respect and dignity (i.e belittling you in a gym full of people) then you should definitely find a new trainer. She sounds like a nut. Maybe speak with the gym manager about your situation and see if they can match you up with someone who is more understanding and less of an a-hole.
  • Miss_Hiker_Pants
    Miss_Hiker_Pants Posts: 229 Member
    punch her in the throat and find another trainer.


    :laugh:
  • jj2step
    jj2step Posts: 16 Member
    punch her in the throat and find another trainer.

    ahahahah this made me giggle i agree hahha xx
  • celtbell3
    celtbell3 Posts: 738 Member
    I think after biggest loser, there is often confusion on what is acceptable behavior between the trainer and trainee and the lines often get blurry. Obviously you are not motivated by her behavior so I would terminate this relationship but in the future, I would recommend discussing acceptable limits with your new trainer - just so everyone is on the same page. Regarding your pain, is it simply muscle soreness or is it more? You need to gauge if you should visit the Dr. - don't hesitate if you think you should. Things could get worse.
  • RoseTears143
    RoseTears143 Posts: 1,121 Member
    punch her in the throat and find another trainer.

    I 2nd this :D
  • PinkNinjaLaura
    PinkNinjaLaura Posts: 3,202 Member
    punch her in the throat and find another trainer.

    ^^^^^ this is my favorite answer

    I work out with a trainer. I get sore and sometimes will hurt for a few days, but (1) never to the point where I'm in tears and (2) if I am that sore he adjusts my workout accordingly.
  • Leah_Alexis
    Leah_Alexis Posts: 139 Member
    Find another trainer!
  • Hezzietiger1
    Hezzietiger1 Posts: 1,256 Member
    Get another trainer. She should be for you not against you. And it should be about holistic wellness not just to kick your *kitten* in the gym. Sounds bad. I'm let her go.
  • HealthWoke0ish
    HealthWoke0ish Posts: 2,078 Member
    Find a new trainer.

    Amen. Agree with her and say, "You're right...this IS a professional relationship," continue with..."Sadly, YOU are not".
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,659 Member
    I am sorry to hear you had to go through that OP. Find another trainer, one that wants to help you and is professional rather than one that is trying to be like one of the trainers on The Biggest Loser programmes.

    Secondly, soreness and lactic acid buildup is one thing, but if part of you really is in pain and it is a sharp sort of pain, get that sorted, you may have hurt yourself.
  • Mrs_Bones
    Mrs_Bones Posts: 195 Member
    You pay money for someone to help you get to where you need to be; not belittle you or hurt you. If I were you, I would fire her and find someone with someone else. You do not want to go through everyday with her having it be like that. FInd someone else. :)

    Agreed! You are paying for her to HELP you, not yell at you and make you feel stupid. Good for you for showing up to your workout even though you're sore, that shows dedication! She should have nutured that drive and seen it as a teaching opportunity for healing techniques.
  • jody664
    jody664 Posts: 397 Member
    First, fire her. Second go to club manager. Muscle soreness is fine for a few days. If you are in this much pain you may have hurt yourself. Did you see a doctor? Be your own advocate here and tell the trainer to go pound sand. She sucks.
    ^^ This. Definitely make sure you talk to the club manager. Make a stink. Tell the manager you are very disappointed in the PT. The club manager doesn't always know how a PT is treating clients and needs to know. Demand that you be refunded the amount you paid this PT and that they assign a new one to you promptly.
  • laughingdani
    laughingdani Posts: 2,275 Member
    Clearly she has lost the "professional" part in your professional relationship.
    She obviously has some issues in her life that she's taking out on you. And probably
    others, since they are cancelling sessions.

    Find someone else. You deserve to have someone push you to be your best; not BULLY you.
    That's what she's doing.
  • elleloch
    elleloch Posts: 739 Member
    Yep - it is a professional relationship, you WILL be sore after a really good workout with a trainer but it's perfectly clear that your personalities are not working well together. If the work was too much for you, she needed to be able to listen to your concerns and work with you on making it right. Find a new trainer.
  • SkinnyMsFitness
    SkinnyMsFitness Posts: 389 Member
    Sorry that you're dealing with this trainer... My response would be, yes, it IS a professional relationship - maybe you should start acting more professional. Although you were not in the wrong to show up without canceling (where's the logic in that anyways?), but she should have never demeaned you like that...esp in front of others.

    I agree with other commenters - find a new trainer! Good luck and don't let her put you down. Don't let anyone in life put you down.

    About the soreness, there may be no shame in taking it easy for another week. Is your whole body sore? Can you work out other problem areas that aren't affected right now? Just remember, you will rip your muscles, but they need time to heal too.

    Good luck!
  • kcrxgirl
    kcrxgirl Posts: 114 Member
    She's correct, it's a professional relationship. You are not satisfied with the job performance that you're paying for, so she should be fired.
  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
    I've always been a slow to recover person (a good leg workout can have me sore and walking funny for a week). So, don't get too wrapped up in that. The trainer should have been open to listen to your concerns and help you assess whether you need to lower the intensity of sessions or mix in more active rest between sessions. I've found that eating more spinach, kale and berries and taking multivitamins helps reduce my recovery time.

    Since you're not her only client, I would have a talk to with the club management. Tell them you don't think the PT you have is a good match and you'd like their help finding another one. This allows the club management to get in the middle and they should support you in getting transitioned to a new trainer (and getting back any prepaid sessions).
  • Sactown900
    Sactown900 Posts: 162 Member
    I have been lifting for 47 years. I never found it necessary to get an attitude on anyone I taught how to lift weights. Find a PT with better communication skills.

    To quote a trainer I had on an 8 Man Crew team, "If I wanted to get yelled at again, I would call my parents for free."
  • JodieP13
    JodieP13 Posts: 94 Member
    Fire that hooker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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