Chuck Norris Facts

TheRoadDog
TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
edited November 2024 in Chit-Chat
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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Replies

  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet, he scares the *kitten* out of it.
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Chuck Norris,s real name is Jessica .....big jess for short :D
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris….the cop was lucky to leave with a warning.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
  • tat2cookie
    tat2cookie Posts: 1,899 Member
    Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Death once had a near Chuck Norris event
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn’t dead it is just afriad to move.
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Im fackin crying lol
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
  • Feeline666
    Feeline666 Posts: 56 Member
    http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
    :D
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
  • barry1992
    barry1992 Posts: 692 Member
    most excellent website.............i never laughed so much
  • Feeline666
    Feeline666 Posts: 56 Member
    Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris.
    ^^^ my fave.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
  • CJisinShape
    CJisinShape Posts: 1,404 Member
    Chuck Norris decided he would get a pet. Here's a pic:















    lrdei2p3qc54.jpg
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    The following is a short list of things Chuck Norris cannot do:

    1.
    2.
    3.
    4.
    5.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Mr Miyagi waxes Chuck Norris's car.
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    Yesss!!!!
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    Chuck Norris once ran backwards from a fight. He did that so he could kick that dude's *kitten* from the other side.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris Won "Iron Chef America" with only one dish and an expired, unheated microwave burrito from 7-Eleven.
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    A giraffe became a girafffe because Chuck Norris kicked a horse under the mouth
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Chuck Norris is the reason NWA ran Straight Outta Compton.
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    Chuck Norris had sex in a semi. Some of his sperm got into the engine, and now the truck is known as Optimus Prime
  • tat2cookie
    tat2cookie Posts: 1,899 Member
    Chuck Norris once strangled a man with a cordless phone.
This discussion has been closed.

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