I'm over it.

sunnshhiine

so... here's my story... the short of it...

March-June 2012 -- Weight Watchers
June-October 2012 - nothing
October 2012-February 2013 - MFP
February-May 2013 - MFP (inconsistantly)
May 2013-Present (MFP...ish)

In short, i'm over it. I'm over restricting myself, working my butt off at a gym, fad diets, weightloss supplements, etc and etc. only to hit a plateau and get stuck when I only have 15 more pounds to go. Then I lose motivation, gain 5-10 lbs back, get tired of the weight gain, restrict again... and the vicious cycle goes on and on. I'm tired of feeling like a sow, but at the same time I've lost all motivation to do anything about it. *sigh*

Anyone have any motivation or tips on how to make this better? Because, honestly, I'm over it (which I've said 27 times already).

bonitacash08

Honestly? The best advice I could give would be to dig deep and get over it. Stuff is hard. If you want it bad enough, the difficulty won't stop you.

Looking at the timeline you've written, you haven't stuck with anything long enough to build a lifestyle. Three months isn't long enough. Fad diets, starvation, obsessive exercising--those things don't work in the long term. You have to reevaluate your goals and yourself before you can start again.

It won't get better, easier, or any of that. But it will become worth it. You'll push past the difficult parts and that's when you'll succeed.

JessicaPasieka

I agree. You either want a healthy lifestyle or you don't. You're either going to put the work in or you're not. Sometimes, you won't seem results for a long sprint of time. That doesn't mean that you give up. It means you research and try new things and keep pushing yourself to your best potential.

PlayerHatinDogooder

Honestly? The best advice I could give would be to dig deep and get over it.

I think she's already over it.

My advice would be to get under it.

KatLifter

It's about moderation and a lifestyle change. Set your macros and stick to them. You don't have to cut anything out, just make them fit.
Calculate your TDEE for your calories. Then adjust your macros (protein/carbs/fat) to meet your goals. Then be patient.

That's it. Doesn't have to be dramatic.

mojohowitz

(S)he is able who thinks (s)he is able. -Buddha


Are you able to do this?

kellyw036

Honestly? The best advice I could give would be to dig deep and get over it. Stuff is hard. If you want it bad enough, the difficulty won't stop you.

Looking at the timeline you've written, you haven't stuck with anything long enough to build a lifestyle. Three months isn't long enough. Fad diets, starvation, obsessive exercising--those things don't work in the long term. You have to reevaluate your goals and yourself before you can start again.

It won't get better, easier, or any of that. But it will become worth it. You'll push past the difficult parts and that's when you'll succeed.

THIS. It is not always easy, it is not always fun, but if something is important to you, you commit. Did deep and find it. I finally did 4 months ago and this time feels different because it is....different because you don't give up.
You can do it. Find it!

sunnshhiine

It's about moderation and a lifestyle change. Set your macros and stick to them. You don't have to cut anything out, just make them fit.
Calculate your TDEE for your calories. Then adjust your macros (protein/carbs/fat) to meet your goals. Then be patient.

That's it. Doesn't have to be dramatic.

I'm not familiar with "TDEE" -- what is that?
And how does one adjust their macros to meet goals? Is there a calculator or something that you can enter your stats into to find out what is best for you?

kellykw

If you're really "over it," there's nothing we or anyone else can say or do to help you. You have to kick your own butt and help yourself. It's really not as complicated as we all tend to make it. Expend more than you take in. Work your muscles. Track what you're doing so you know what to adjust if you aren't getting the results you want. Repeat every day.

Pearsquared

Only eat what you enjoy, just eat less if it's calorie-dense. Eat more of the things you enjoy that's less calorie-dense. Don't eliminate any foods.

Only do the exercises you enjoy - even if it's just walking. Don't force yourself to do things you don't want to do just because people say that's the most effective thing.

Lose the weight slowly - set no deadlines, even weekly. The only supplements you should be touching are ones your doctor has asked you to touch.

This is a lifetime change. If you don't feel like you can do it for the rest of your life, it won't work.

1ConcreteGirl

Well now you know what doesn't work: restricting, over-exercising, inconsistent logging, and extremism.

Sounds like you are ready to do what's worked for me and many others: moderation.

Eat what you want, whenever you want it, as long as it fits your macros and calories. As for calories, get online and google a TDEE calculator. Look yours up and subtract 20% from your TDEE. That's how many calories you should be eating. It's not hard. In fact, that's all there is to it.

ETA: I posted this before I saw you respond. TDEE is total daily energy expenditure: the number of calories you need to eat to maintain your weight at whatever your current activity level is. Since you want to drop weight, eat 20% less than your TDEE for slow, steady loss.

Macros: it should be in grams, not percents. Google a lean body mass calculator, figure yours out, then set your macros on MFP to be at least 1gm protein per pound of lean body mass, at least 0.35 grams fat per pound of lean body mass, and the rest can be carbs.

Go to home, then "goals" tab at the top of your page to manually set your goals.

sunnshhiine

Well now you know what doesn't work: restricting, over-exercising, inconsistent logging, and extremism.

Sounds like you are ready to do what's worked for me and many others: moderation.

Eat what you want, whenever you want it, as long as it fits your macros and calories. As for calories, get online and google a TDEE calculator. Look yours up and subtract 20% from your TDEE. That's how many calories you should be eating. It's not hard. In fact, that's all there is to it.

This is the first I've heard about how to figure out your TDEE. I'll google one now. I've only ever done what MFP tells me to do -- and most of the time I felt like I was starving myself. Thanks for the suggestions -- I appreciate them.

KatLifter

It's about moderation and a lifestyle change. Set your macros and stick to them. You don't have to cut anything out, just make them fit.
Calculate your TDEE for your calories. Then adjust your macros (protein/carbs/fat) to meet your goals. Then be patient.

That's it. Doesn't have to be dramatic.

I'm not familiar with "TDEE" -- what is that?
And how does one adjust their macros to meet goals? Is there a calculator or something that you can enter your stats into to find out what is best for you?

BMR = How many calories your body burns just by staying alive (coma patient)
TDEE = how many calories you use a day based on your activity level. TDEE-15 or 20% is a pretty good base to lose weight in a safe and steady way. You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.

40%protein/30% carbs/30% fat or 30%protein/40% carbs/30% fat are pretty standard splits for macros. Some people eat more carbs or fat, it depends on how your body reacts to things.

1ConcreteGirl

It's about moderation and a lifestyle change. Set your macros and stick to them. You don't have to cut anything out, just make them fit.
Calculate your TDEE for your calories. Then adjust your macros (protein/carbs/fat) to meet your goals. Then be patient.

That's it. Doesn't have to be dramatic.

I'm not familiar with "TDEE" -- what is that?
And how does one adjust their macros to meet goals? Is there a calculator or something that you can enter your stats into to find out what is best for you?

BMR = How many calories your body burns just by staying alive (coma patient)
TDEE = how many calories you use a day based on your activity level. TDEE-15 or 20% is a pretty good base to lose weight in a safe and steady way. You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.

40%protein/30% carbs/30% fat or 30%protein/40% carbs/30% fat are pretty standard splits for macros. Some people eat more carbs or fat, it depends on how your body reacts to things.

Clarification: TDEE is how many calories you use a day in order to STAY THE SAME WEIGHT

Since you want to drop weight, eat 20% less than your TDEE for slow, steady loss.

Macros: You should set these in grams, not percents. Google a lean body mass calculator, figure yours out, then set your macros on MFP to be at least 1gm protein per pound of lean body mass, at least 0.35 grams fat per pound of lean body mass, and the rest can be carbs.

The protein helps you maintain lean body mass (so you don't get flabby) and the fat ensures proper hormone function (really important for women).

sunnshhiine

You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.

Ok, when I did the calculator, this is what I got:

BMR: 1436
TDEE: 1975

TheHorribleBlob

Screw moderation, calorie counting and restricting. Add more veggies to your diet. I would avoid frozen vegetable (mostly because I think that gross). Stop worrying about how much you're eating and start focusing on what you're eating. Vegetables are good for you and they're low in calories.

1ConcreteGirl

You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.

Ok, when I did the calculator, this is what I got:

BMR: 1436
TDEE: 1975

So you should be eating approximately 1750 calories per day to lose weight

It sounds like a lot, I know. But you already know that over-restricting didn't work for you, so it's time to try something better.

Slowly increase your calories by about 100 per week until you get to 1750, then sit there for a month. The weight will start dropping.

Be super accurate with your logging. Respect your macros. This truly works.

BrainyBurro

OP,

get into the Eat Train Progress group and start learning WHY things work and you won't ever have to worry about being frustrated about any of this again.

start by reading all the important threads linked from here:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/833026-important-posts-to-read

those will help you figure out what your real calorie goal should be, what your macros should be, the various things that can help you with your weight loss, what won't, etc.

break the yo-yo'ing cycle forever.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/10118-eat-train-progress

sunnshhiine

Screw moderation, calorie counting and restricting. Add more veggies to your diet. I would avoid frozen vegetable (mostly because I think that gross). Stop worrying about how much you're eating and start focusing on what you're eating. Vegetables are good for you and they're low in calories.

I'm a Vegetarian... so veggies are a huge staple in my diet. Well, correction -- i "was" a vegetarian. I recently added chicken back into my diet to up my protein.

thanks for the suggestions.

Pamela117e

I'm with you -- the constant struggle without success is very wearing on the psyche. Shutting down the negative dialog in my head is difficult so every now and then I give myself a breather for a couple of days and then come back feeling better and more psychologically ready to fight on. Do for yourself what you would do for a friend and give yourself a pep talk drowning out that negative voice, then pick up the mantel and soldier on. Success is important to you otherwise you wouldn't have asked for help and wanting it is half the battle!

sunnshhiine

You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.

Ok, when I did the calculator, this is what I got:

BMR: 1436
TDEE: 1975

So you should be eating approximately 1750 calories per day to lose weight

It sounds like a lot, I know. But you already know that over-restricting didn't work for you, so it's time to try something better.

Slowly increase your calories by about 100 per week until you get to 1750, then sit there for a month. The weight will start dropping.

Be super accurate with your logging. Respect your macros. This truly works.

THANK YOU! I really appreciate all of your help! I will do this!