gym = embarrasing
Replies
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yopeeps025 wrote: »just to let you know, the people you see at the gym had the same feeling you have now. it'll pass and you'll be in beast mode soon enough like everyone else in there
I have been overweight for the major of my life. I never felt negative feeling about where or what gym I workout at.
I think he was referring to the intimidating feeling of going to the gym for the first few times. I know I felt it, especially when I started lifting. I think the majority of people feel it. Cheers to you if you haven't experienced that because it really is an awful feeling. Haha. But yes, you have to get over it and in no time you're seeing changes, getting stronger, feeling more comfortable in your own skin and in turn feeling more comfortable doin your thing at the gym.
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When I first went I was very embarassed but quickly got over it.
I took my mom for the first time last night. She hasn't been to a gym in probably 30 years. She kept saying "I feel like everyone is staring at me." I would snap at her to stop thinking that way, it's not true. She felt very self conscious and unsure of herself. I realized after a few minutes that it wasn't her fault, it was common. I kept assuring her it was okay because no one there cared what she looked like. I pointed out many other people of similar age and size that were working out there as well to help her feel for comfortable. By the time we left she felt much more at ease.0 -
OP,
Do not worry about what people think at gym. Do your thing and leave. Seriously no one cares and no one bothers. Everyone is trying to get the workout done.
EDTA: I have no idea why in the world everytime ... everytime someone has to even mention about PF and people will charge in to bash. C'mon guys it's getting old and boring.
Every gym has it's ups and downs. Every gym.0 -
No. You only feel embarrassed when you go to the gym without a plan. If you have a solid plan and done your research you shouldn't feel any embarrassment.0
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Dont ever feel self conscious in the gym. No one notices or pays any special attention to your body - but people will notice and compliment you when they see great positive change. My gym is a very social place to me, where I feel among friends. I see the same faces every day, and it feels great. Once I made more friends at my gym, it became easier and easier to go. It was like a treat to get to see all of them.0
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branflakes1980 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »just to let you know, the people you see at the gym had the same feeling you have now. it'll pass and you'll be in beast mode soon enough like everyone else in there
I have been overweight for the major of my life. I never felt negative feeling about where or what gym I workout at.
I think he was referring to the intimidating feeling of going to the gym for the first few times. I know I felt it, especially when I started lifting. I think the majority of people feel it. Cheers to you if you haven't experienced that because it really is an awful feeling. Haha. But yes, you have to get over it and in no time you're seeing changes, getting stronger, feeling more comfortable in your own skin and in turn feeling more comfortable doin your thing at the gym.
Well it helps to have other there to. I had my older brother most of his lifting friends when I started so I never saw this new intimidating place known as the gym to some. Even at my worst when I used to swim at my school pool and to know that my tits were bigger than some of the women there. I still never had a issue. Why be insecure about that?0 -
Nah. I'm not looking at the other people and I doubt they are looking at me. I only look over if someone is doing something really noisy and obnoxious like clanging the weight stack down over and over.0
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yopeeps025 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »just to let you know, the people you see at the gym had the same feeling you have now. it'll pass and you'll be in beast mode soon enough like everyone else in there
I have been overweight for the major of my life. I never felt negative feeling about where or what gym I workout at.
I think he was referring to the intimidating feeling of going to the gym for the first few times. I know I felt it, especially when I started lifting. I think the majority of people feel it. Cheers to you if you haven't experienced that because it really is an awful feeling. Haha. But yes, you have to get over it and in no time you're seeing changes, getting stronger, feeling more comfortable in your own skin and in turn feeling more comfortable doin your thing at the gym.
Well it helps to have other there to. I had my older brother most of his lifting friends when I started so I never saw this new intimidating place known as the gym to some. Even at my worst when I used to swim at my school pool and to know that my tits were bigger than some of the women there. I still never had a issue. Why be insecure about that?
I think that's awesome that you are so comfortable with yourself. For me and many others I think the intimidation comes / came not from being worried about others judging your looks / figure etc. but comes from a place of insecurity about not doing it right, or being lost and looking like a complete moron having no clue what you are doing while surrounded by all of these fit people that know what they are doing. Haha!! But as a poster above mentioned, if you put the time in and the research and have a solid plan when you go that will help alot! !
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My gym embarrassment comes and goes. The fewer people there, the better I feel. I enjoy Zumba but I am a nightmare to be next to. I get claustrophobic when there are too many people in the gym and will sometimes cut my work outs short just so I can leave.
I tried working out with my BF once at the gym and he commented on how many guys were checking me out, which made me even more self conscious about how I looked and my form, or if I looked like an octopus dying in pain.
I have had a few people comment on my form and try to correct it. I have had 2 gentlemen save me from being pinned by a barbell on separate occasions (talk about embarrassing!).
I try really hard not to judge others at the gym, but I am not perfect. People who get judged: Deadlifters in Squat Racks when there is a line, women who wear make up and dangley jewelry trying, and people who drape towels over multiple resistance machines so they can do a circuit. They are judged as Rude, Stupid (jewelry can be super dangerous), and Rude, in that order.
I have run into several people from Outside The Gym and it is hella awkward for me. They want to chat or catch up or w/e and all I want to do is keep moving so my HR stays up and so I can get to work on time.
So bottom line, most people don't give *kitten* about you, just do what you need to do.0 -
I used to feel the same way. It didn't take long before I realized that everyone else at the gym was there to do their own thing, just like I was. Most people are too wrapped up in their own workouts to worry about what you look like or what you're doing there.0
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kassienoriega wrote: »Anyone else feel the same way? I can't shake the feeling of embarrassment everytime I step into the gym though I know with time it will go away. But does anyone share the same feeling?
If it helps, nobody at the gym will be looking down on you, in fact it's more likely the complete opposite. Even the 'meatheads' in gyms are usually really good people who'll either pay you little notice or even give you help and advice. There's generally an unspoken rapport between gym users. Everyone there is there for a good reason, so everyone gets respected for that.0 -
branflakes1980 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »just to let you know, the people you see at the gym had the same feeling you have now. it'll pass and you'll be in beast mode soon enough like everyone else in there
I have been overweight for the major of my life. I never felt negative feeling about where or what gym I workout at.
I think he was referring to the intimidating feeling of going to the gym for the first few times. I know I felt it, especially when I started lifting. I think the majority of people feel it. Cheers to you if you haven't experienced that because it really is an awful feeling. Haha. But yes, you have to get over it and in no time you're seeing changes, getting stronger, feeling more comfortable in your own skin and in turn feeling more comfortable doin your thing at the gym.
Well it helps to have other there to. I had my older brother most of his lifting friends when I started so I never saw this new intimidating place known as the gym to some. Even at my worst when I used to swim at my school pool and to know that my tits were bigger than some of the women there. I still never had a issue. Why be insecure about that?
I think that's awesome that you are so comfortable with yourself. For me and many others I think the intimidation comes / came not from being worried about others judging your looks / figure etc. but comes from a place of insecurity about not doing it right, or being lost and looking like a complete moron having no clue what you are doing while surrounded by all of these fit people that know what they are doing. Haha!! But as a poster above mentioned, if you put the time in and the research and have a solid plan when you go that will help alot! !
Two things
1) I did just wake up one day and be fine that my tits are big. That my tits are where sometimes bigger than women I would talk. I am still not fine with this. It is what it is. It is more acceptance and hoping with weight loss it will finally turn to pecs.
2)I learn to laugh at myself. So when someone pokes fun at me for whatever I have more likely already handle that and laughed at myself about.0 -
I can understand the apprehension, but people arent interested. When I see really heavy people then I hope they keep it up and admire them for doing something about their situation.
When I first went I joined a small gym that had lots of pensioners and people recovering from injuries and it was less intimidating. I was so interested and focused on what I wanted to do and learning about he equipment with mu plan and making note of all the weights and my performance that I was obvliovious to anything else. Knowing what you are going to do when you get there is a big boon and if you record times and weights then you cna see your performance and improvements. I already knew I was unfit, but patted myself on the back for getting my *kitten* into gear and doing something about it.0 -
It's a normal reaction for many people. Once you try and move yourself out of your comfort zone , you ( like me ) will be the better for it.
It can seem daunting , but only lasts a day or 2. There are idiots at the gym , much the same as there are idiots at the supermarket or walking along the street. It wouldn't stop you walking to the shops or getting your groceries ..
You'll be fine
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Sorry, but no. I don't want to start another PF bashfest here, but it's the most judgmental gym around.I have also felt that way at gyms but recently I joing Planet Fitness and love it. It's a "No judgement Zone"
The worst part is that they try to foster the same insecurities that the OP posted about. They will tell you that other gyms are filled with amazingly buff people who will sneer at and ridicule average folks. The reality is that the vast majority of gyms are filled with everyday people, and the more advanced folks are often among the most supportive. After all, they know that getting in shape takes hard work, and they have a passion for doing so.
Don't want to be judged? That's great, but Planet Fitness is NOT the solution. They're the problem.
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Sorry, but no. I don't want to start another PF bashfest here, but it's the most judgmental gym around.I have also felt that way at gyms but recently I joing Planet Fitness and love it. It's a "No judgement Zone"
The worst part is that they try to foster the same insecurities that the OP posted about. They will tell you that other gyms are filled with amazingly buff people who will sneer at and ridicule average folks. The reality is that the vast majority of gyms are filled with everyday people, and the more advanced folks are often among the most supportive. After all, they know that getting in shape takes hard work, and they have a passion for doing so.
Don't want to be judged? That's great, but Planet Fitness is NOT the solution. They're the problem.0 -
OP,
Do not worry about what people think at gym. Do your thing and leave. Seriously no one cares and no one bothers. Everyone is trying to get the workout done.
EDTA: I have no idea why in the world everytime ... everytime someone has to even mention about PF and people will charge in to bash. C'mon guys it's getting old and boring.
Every gym has it's ups and downs. Every gym.
I agree, gym bashing along with philosophy bashing and opinion bashing, etc ...its old and boring and a waste of a post.
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Yes, A lot of people feel this way. No, you really shouldn't, but human nature being what it is, sometimes you just do. My best advice to you would be to summon up as much confidence as you can and engage some of those in the gym, ask for help, ask if they can demonstrate proper form to you....anything, just get engaged. I posted in a different thread, I am still the scrawny guy in the gym I go to, but I have engaged the people there and found they are, for the most part, really good people. I think I am now the mascot or something. But whatever, Don't. Ever. Quit.0
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well I do feel embarrassed, I actually think girls behind me where laughing at me, because I was struggling with the exercises. its hard enough to start going to the gym but to have people make fun of you is just stupid, and it makes you not want to do. But I will be sad today, and im going back tomorrow.0
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kassienoriega wrote: »Anyone else feel the same way? I can't shake the feeling of embarrassment everytime I step into the gym though I know with time it will go away. But does anyone share the same feeling?
I used to get this way. It fades with time. Especially, if you become a gym regular and the staff starts getting to know you by name. Then it can feel really welcoming.
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branflakes1980 wrote: »There are a lot of people in there in your state, and a lot of fit people in there that used to be overweight. When I see very overweight people in the gym I think "AWESOME FOR THEM", they are taking the first steps. When I see overweight people waddle out of Dennys I think...."DISGUSTING....they don't have to be like this". Be more embarrassed about not being in the gym The hard work will pay off, if you honestly put your all in.....I promise it will pay off.
That's a pretty arrogant judgement to make. How do you know that one or two or several of those "fat people waddling" aren't doing something to lose weight and maybe they were just out with their family. My family and I stop at Dennys when we're on a road trip..or Cracker Barrel, or IHOP....how do you know I didn't order an egg white omelette and black coffee??!
People like you making judgments like that are the reason overweight people DO feel embarrassed when they go to the gym. My friend told me her husband often makes remarks about "look at the fattie" if they see someone overweight trying to walk or jog along the road. I had a huge fear of being judged when I first got my bicycle and was riding out in public for everyone to see me.
What if I had just finished a 20 mile bike ride, went home, got changed into regular clothes and stopped at the diner on my way to work for a cheeseburger because I was starving and needed the protein and energy? Yeah, you'd probably sit there in judgement of me.
You should be ashamed. You don't know the stories of random strangers.
Would it have been less arrogant had he said "when I see overweight people at Denny's eating an order of Moons over My Hammy, with 2 sides of pancakes and a plate of bacon", or if he would have said "when I see overweight people eating a big mac from McDonalds". I think you missed the point completely because you were so quick to jump on the defensive. Losing weight and being healthy is a lifestyle change, so when I, you, he or anyone for that matter sees an overweight person walking out of the gym that is awesome as that person clearly is trying to better themselves. Should he have said waddle? Probably not, but he was giving a compliment to people that are trying. That is all, no need to over think it.
Oh and if someone is in need of Protein and energy I can think of much healthier alternatives than popping into Dennys for a cheeseburger after a run. Don't get me wrong, I eat all the food, cheeseburgers, cheese cake, pizza etc. but in Moderation and because i am far enough along in my journey to do so without comprimising my "lifestyle change" for a person new to that journey Denny's cheeseburgers aren't really the greatest source of protein.
IIFYM and it's NYOB. Period.
Err..NOYB.
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There's a reason why Planet Fitness is routinely bashed here and in other fora. Sure, every gym has its problems. Planet Fitness, however, actively spreads misinformation, exploits and fosters its members' insecurities, and actively prevents people from doing the things that will help them the most.
No gym is perfect, but the vast majority of them do operate in a way that's consistent with the general mission of fitness. Planet Fitness is one of the few that actively works against that goal. Can you get in shape there? Sure, but it's DESPITE their methods, not because of them.
They are a unique case. There's no excusing this on the grounds that "every gym has its problems."
What's more, consider the nature of the OP. The original poster expressed concern about feeling intimidated in the gym. The vast majority of posters here have affirmed that there's no real reason to feel intimidated. In that light, It's only fair to point out that Planet Fitness actively promotes such insecurities by saying "Oh, don't go to those other places! You'll just experience gymtimidation there. Come to our place where it's safe."0 -
It will pass the more you go and the more comfortable you get there. I thought when I first started everyone was saying "what the heck is that fat girl think she is doing here?" Come to find out no one really paid me any attention and then ones that did...well they have been coming up to me lately and saying what an amazing transformation I have made and they love my dedication.
Keep going!
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branflakes1980 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »There are a lot of people in there in your state, and a lot of fit people in there that used to be overweight. When I see very overweight people in the gym I think "AWESOME FOR THEM", they are taking the first steps. When I see overweight people waddle out of Dennys I think...."DISGUSTING....they don't have to be like this". Be more embarrassed about not being in the gym The hard work will pay off, if you honestly put your all in.....I promise it will pay off.
That's a pretty arrogant judgement to make. How do you know that one or two or several of those "fat people waddling" aren't doing something to lose weight and maybe they were just out with their family. My family and I stop at Dennys when we're on a road trip..or Cracker Barrel, or IHOP....how do you know I didn't order an egg white omelette and black coffee??!
People like you making judgments like that are the reason overweight people DO feel embarrassed when they go to the gym. My friend told me her husband often makes remarks about "look at the fattie" if they see someone overweight trying to walk or jog along the road. I had a huge fear of being judged when I first got my bicycle and was riding out in public for everyone to see me.
What if I had just finished a 20 mile bike ride, went home, got changed into regular clothes and stopped at the diner on my way to work for a cheeseburger because I was starving and needed the protein and energy? Yeah, you'd probably sit there in judgement of me.
You should be ashamed. You don't know the stories of random strangers.
Would it have been less arrogant had he said "when I see overweight people at Denny's eating an order of Moons over My Hammy, with 2 sides of pancakes and a plate of bacon", or if he would have said "when I see overweight people eating a big mac from McDonalds". I think you missed the point completely because you were so quick to jump on the defensive. Losing weight and being healthy is a lifestyle change, so when I, you, he or anyone for that matter sees an overweight person walking out of the gym that is awesome as that person clearly is trying to better themselves. Should he have said waddle? Probably not, but he was giving a compliment to people that are trying. That is all, no need to over think it.
Oh and if someone is in need of Protein and energy I can think of much healthier alternatives than popping into Dennys for a cheeseburger after a run. Don't get me wrong, I eat all the food, cheeseburgers, cheese cake, pizza etc. but in Moderation and because i am far enough along in my journey to do so without comprimising my "lifestyle change" for a person new to that journey Denny's cheeseburgers aren't really the greatest source of protein.
IIFYM and it's NYOB. Period.
The probability of someone new to this journey having a clue what IIFYM is small, and I think you meant "it's NOYB" because NYOB doesn't make sense. And it is my business because you posting things on a public internet forum makes it not only my business but everyone elses business as well, so if you do not want other peoples opinions on your misjudgements please keep your opinions to yourself. Have a lovely day!
What I EAT is NOYB. What anyone eats is NOYB. I am very new to this with 90 lbs to lose and I know what I I FYM means. You really are full of assumptions about people. And I apologize for my typo with NOYB.0 -
I have found myself embarrassed in the past. But I always think of it this way: All these great looking, fit, muscular people started where I started. No one is judging us. You're only wrong if you don't go to the gym/stay active.0
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I did, but got over it real quick. Actually one of my fave places now and I consider myself on the shy side.
Smile a lot, go in with a positive attitude and things will take care of themselves0 -
branflakes1980 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »There are a lot of people in there in your state, and a lot of fit people in there that used to be overweight. When I see very overweight people in the gym I think "AWESOME FOR THEM", they are taking the first steps. When I see overweight people waddle out of Dennys I think...."DISGUSTING....they don't have to be like this". Be more embarrassed about not being in the gym The hard work will pay off, if you honestly put your all in.....I promise it will pay off.
That's a pretty arrogant judgement to make. How do you know that one or two or several of those "fat people waddling" aren't doing something to lose weight and maybe they were just out with their family. My family and I stop at Dennys when we're on a road trip..or Cracker Barrel, or IHOP....how do you know I didn't order an egg white omelette and black coffee??!
People like you making judgments like that are the reason overweight people DO feel embarrassed when they go to the gym. My friend told me her husband often makes remarks about "look at the fattie" if they see someone overweight trying to walk or jog along the road. I had a huge fear of being judged when I first got my bicycle and was riding out in public for everyone to see me.
What if I had just finished a 20 mile bike ride, went home, got changed into regular clothes and stopped at the diner on my way to work for a cheeseburger because I was starving and needed the protein and energy? Yeah, you'd probably sit there in judgement of me.
You should be ashamed. You don't know the stories of random strangers.
Would it have been less arrogant had he said "when I see overweight people at Denny's eating an order of Moons over My Hammy, with 2 sides of pancakes and a plate of bacon", or if he would have said "when I see overweight people eating a big mac from McDonalds". I think you missed the point completely because you were so quick to jump on the defensive. Losing weight and being healthy is a lifestyle change, so when I, you, he or anyone for that matter sees an overweight person walking out of the gym that is awesome as that person clearly is trying to better themselves. Should he have said waddle? Probably not, but he was giving a compliment to people that are trying. That is all, no need to over think it.
Oh and if someone is in need of Protein and energy I can think of much healthier alternatives than popping into Dennys for a cheeseburger after a run. Don't get me wrong, I eat all the food, cheeseburgers, cheese cake, pizza etc. but in Moderation and because i am far enough along in my journey to do so without comprimising my "lifestyle change" for a person new to that journey Denny's cheeseburgers aren't really the greatest source of protein.
IIFYM and it's NYOB. Period.
The probability of someone new to this journey having a clue what IIFYM is small, and I think you meant "it's NOYB" because NYOB doesn't make sense. And it is my business because you posting things on a public internet forum makes it not only my business but everyone elses business as well, so if you do not want other peoples opinions on your misjudgements please keep your opinions to yourself. Have a lovely day!
What I EAT is NOYB. What anyone eats is NOYB .
Again, no one was saying anything about what you eat or what anyone eats. The general statement was made that someone overweight leaving the gym is a much more inspirational thing to see than someone overweight leaving a Denny's. Is that wrong? I don't think so but clearly you have a problem with it so maybe agree to disagree? Carry on!
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branflakes1980 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »branflakes1980 wrote: »There are a lot of people in there in your state, and a lot of fit people in there that used to be overweight. When I see very overweight people in the gym I think "AWESOME FOR THEM", they are taking the first steps. When I see overweight people waddle out of Dennys I think...."DISGUSTING....they don't have to be like this". Be more embarrassed about not being in the gym The hard work will pay off, if you honestly put your all in.....I promise it will pay off.
That's a pretty arrogant judgement to make. How do you know that one or two or several of those "fat people waddling" aren't doing something to lose weight and maybe they were just out with their family. My family and I stop at Dennys when we're on a road trip..or Cracker Barrel, or IHOP....how do you know I didn't order an egg white omelette and black coffee??!
People like you making judgments like that are the reason overweight people DO feel embarrassed when they go to the gym. My friend told me her husband often makes remarks about "look at the fattie" if they see someone overweight trying to walk or jog along the road. I had a huge fear of being judged when I first got my bicycle and was riding out in public for everyone to see me.
What if I had just finished a 20 mile bike ride, went home, got changed into regular clothes and stopped at the diner on my way to work for a cheeseburger because I was starving and needed the protein and energy? Yeah, you'd probably sit there in judgement of me.
You should be ashamed. You don't know the stories of random strangers.
Would it have been less arrogant had he said "when I see overweight people at Denny's eating an order of Moons over My Hammy, with 2 sides of pancakes and a plate of bacon", or if he would have said "when I see overweight people eating a big mac from McDonalds". I think you missed the point completely because you were so quick to jump on the defensive. Losing weight and being healthy is a lifestyle change, so when I, you, he or anyone for that matter sees an overweight person walking out of the gym that is awesome as that person clearly is trying to better themselves. Should he have said waddle? Probably not, but he was giving a compliment to people that are trying. That is all, no need to over think it.
Oh and if someone is in need of Protein and energy I can think of much healthier alternatives than popping into Dennys for a cheeseburger after a run. Don't get me wrong, I eat all the food, cheeseburgers, cheese cake, pizza etc. but in Moderation and because i am far enough along in my journey to do so without comprimising my "lifestyle change" for a person new to that journey Denny's cheeseburgers aren't really the greatest source of protein.
IIFYM and it's NYOB. Period.
The probability of someone new to this journey having a clue what IIFYM is small, and I think you meant "it's NOYB" because NYOB doesn't make sense. And it is my business because you posting things on a public internet forum makes it not only my business but everyone elses business as well, so if you do not want other peoples opinions on your misjudgements please keep your opinions to yourself. Have a lovely day!
What I EAT is NOYB. What anyone eats is NOYB .
Again, no one was saying anything about what you eat or what anyone eats. The general statement was made that someone overweight leaving the gym is a much more inspirational thing to see than someone overweight leaving a Denny's. Is that wrong? I don't think so but clearly you have a problem with it so maybe agree to disagree? Carry on!
Making rude assumptions about people you don't know...yes I'm sorry I do have a problem with it.0 -
theres a lot of replies so maybe you said, but why do you feel embarrassed?
i go to zumba every friday. the rest of the women have been going MONTHS (maybe more lol) longer than I have. they know all the moves and effortless float between songs without missing a beat. Meanwhile, im in the back, making up my own moves half the time cause im an uncoordinated wanna be dancer. LOLOL but it doesnt bother me. the ladies are nice, and we chat before and after class, and im getting my workout in (no matter how much i laugh at my inability to jumoandtwirlandtwistandbend all at the same time)
at the GYM.... im there to work out, just like everyone else. Some might have been at it longer than me and look better than me, others are newer and look ' worse'. it doesn't matter and I don't put any thought into anything, other than how long I'm going for on the machine And... I don't really think other people do, either.
you do you. don't worry about other people.0 -
That must be hard for you to feel shame or embarressment about the gym. I believe some of these fears are a product of our childhood and the feedback we got growing up about "self" so you aren't alone in trying to work out issues with feeling shame that aren't reasonable as an adult.
I have the same sorts of issue when I go to the Dr and try to verbalize pain or discomfort...I feel embarressed and the feelings aren't always reasonable. I'm over 50 and avoiding the Dr when I'm sick isn't just crazy making.
I have learned that if I kinda pretend that I'm an "adult" taking my 7 year old "self" to the Dr and reassuring myself that I'll always be there to love and take care of myself it seems to help.
If you have kids- What would you say to them to set them at ease about going to the Gym?
Of course other's aren't judging you harshly in any way at the gym. Lots of people see the gym as where they go to make friends and socialize so they are more likely to want to be your friend than judge you.0
This discussion has been closed.
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