We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....

slimgirljo15

He's a pu$$y

qxana1969

would blare disco first thing in the morning to wake me up

Kvm11628

Wouldn't go to Funky Town

qxana1969

told me I was too freaky

Kvm11628

Her friends were all freaks

WMDemetree

she did not like my friends... really freaky.

Kvm11628

No, no, I wanted to watch Bobby Carnavale. He didn't like Boardwalk Empire

handyrunner

Was always about the tv

Sniper_Chick

painted cartoons on the tv

qxana1969

graffiti'd the house to piss the neighbors off

qxana1969

thought stick figures were artistic

Kvm11628

She wanted me to be a stick. I liked a little meat on my bones.

Sniper_Chick

took all the steaks out of the freezer and duct taped to herself

handyrunner

Encouraged weird meet fetishes

Kvm11628

Wanted me to dress like Lady Gaga

cmDaffy

Wanted me to cover her in hot bacon fat..

Kvm11628

Strangely, dogs were always following her and sniffing around her. Must have been the bacon.

qxana1969

served me bacon even though she knew I was vegetarian

Sniper_Chick

wouldn't eat anything unless it had bacon on it

Kvm11628

Preferred fake bacon bits to the real thing

Sniper_Chick

had to tell her it was fake bacon when really it was chocolate

qxana1969

killed my pet pot belly pig out of desperation for bacon

Kvm11628

Made fun of my pot belly one too many times

Sniper_Chick

thought it was cute to draw pictures on her pot belly and make them dance

handyrunner

Was only interested in pot

Sniper_Chick

tried to tell him Canada wants it legal

qxana1969

put LSD in my kool-aid

srv524

Put roofies into my drink and seduced me. She really wanted to have my kid!

Kvm11628

Never knew when to stop kidding around

GJRicketts

Turns out "my kid" was a reference to my baby goat - she curried it.