How to Avoid Getting Discouraged.

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  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
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    kk811 wrote: »
    So, I understand that fitness is a journey and weight loss is a challenging thing. But how do people keep from feeling upset or even embarrassed by their lack of progress or how bad things have gotten?

    Ive been to the gym almost every day for the last 3-4 weeks. I usually stick to cardio and weight machines, but today a friend (who is super in-shape) offered to help teach me about free weights. We did weighted squats, and I felt absolutely pathetic and embarrassed that I could barely do 100lbs. Afterwords we did crunches and box steps and that was a mess too. All I could think was how bad of shape I was in and how did I ever let myself get to the point where simple things like this were so hard? Im going to keep going to the gym and not stop, but im just really in a negative headspace regarding today.

    Maybe that's how you can motivate yourself. Realising and remembering how unfit your are and comparing it to how unfit you were.

    Maybe after a month 6 month a year you can look back and laugh at how you couldn't do 130kg leg press and now your doing 240kg leg presses.

    Got to start somewhere. That super fit friend wasn't always able to do what he can now.

    Just got to start and head in the right direction.
  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Dude... I can't even do one actual press up. So you are already a winner in my eyes!
  • Foamroller
    Foamroller Posts: 1,041 Member
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    Accept your noobness at the new training. Understand that being bad at something and trying it out is an opportunity for GROWTH. It's actually smart and good to try new stuff on a regular basis. Body adapts pretty fast. Enjoy the victories when your muscle memory kicks in and the exercise that used to feel like hell, suddenly feels easy and too light :) Babysteps and incremental progress.
  • opalsqueak007
    opalsqueak007 Posts: 433 Member
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    Don't hammer yourself with negative thoughts! One year ago I could not get up the stairs or get in and out of the bath. Now I can run, do sit-ups, press-ups and lift heavy weights. Unlike me, you have youth on your side - you can do it! :)
  • lalabrucey
    lalabrucey Posts: 243 Member
    edited April 2015
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    kk811 wrote: »
    So, I understand that fitness is a journey and weight loss is a challenging thing. But how do people keep from feeling upset or even embarrassed by their lack of progress or how bad things have gotten?

    Ive been to the gym almost every day for the last 3-4 weeks. I usually stick to cardio and weight machines, but today a friend (who is super in-shape) offered to help teach me about free weights. We did weighted squats, and I felt absolutely pathetic and embarrassed that I could barely do 100lbs. Afterwords we did crunches and box steps and that was a mess too. All I could think was how bad of shape I was in and how did I ever let myself get to the point where simple things like this were so hard? Im going to keep going to the gym and not stop, but im just really in a negative headspace regarding today.

    Remember your friend has already worked themselves up to where they are now, and probably worked hard too. You will get there but its like climbing a ladder - you gotta work your way up.

    Might I suggest keeping a tracker of exercise/weight/reps in each set each time you do it. Then next time aim to do a little better - you will be so happy when you look back realise you are progressing. Doesn't have to be a novel, just print a grid and write on it - Its what I do.
    Eg
    Dumbell Curl, 10kg, 3 sets of 15: completed = 15, 14, 11

    Next time try for 15, 15, 13... then when you can do all/close to all reps up the weight to keep pushing yourself.

    Comparing yourself to others will just set you up to either feel super awesome or super bad. In my experience it's not a healthy thing to do. Focus on *your* progress. I am sure your friend is just excited you are there and to share their knowledge.

    Hope this is helpful

    L.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    Everyone start somewhere. Your friend probably understands that since he showed you something new. Can't expect to go from 0 to 60 in nothing flat (unless you're in a Tesla). You gotta hit the lower numbers first before you reach 60.
  • SergeantSausage
    SergeantSausage Posts: 1,673 Member
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    It can't be avoided. Can't. We ALL get disvouraged.

    The key is to have the commitment to get through the discouraging times.

    Commitment and simple discipline.

    Marathon training was mine. 7 years ago I had to stop halfway into the first mile at a 17 minute pace (basically walking). Talk about discouraging... Now I run Full Monte 26.2 at 6:45-ish/mile pace and can burn through a 5k at damned close to the 1 mile pace that made me stop.

    The commitment to get out there every day... for 7 years... The discipline to do it, even when it sucks.

    It's not magic, right? There's no secret.

    The old Nike ads said it best: just do it.

    Tony Horton says it in his P90X videos: Just keep hitting play... (hit the play button on the DVD every day)

    Just do it.

    That's it.

    Easy Peasy.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    kk811 wrote: »
    So, I understand that fitness is a journey and weight loss is a challenging thing. But how do people keep from feeling upset or even embarrassed by their lack of progress or how bad things have gotten?

    Ive been to the gym almost every day for the last 3-4 weeks. I usually stick to cardio and weight machines, but today a friend (who is super in-shape) offered to help teach me about free weights. We did weighted squats, and I felt absolutely pathetic and embarrassed that I could barely do 100lbs. Afterwords we did crunches and box steps and that was a mess too. All I could think was how bad of shape I was in and how did I ever let myself get to the point where simple things like this were so hard? Im going to keep going to the gym and not stop, but im just really in a negative headspace regarding today.

    You have posted about this before and your friend. I was surprised becayse I hought it was just that thread being bumped. You got a lot of good advice previously about this. Just acpet you are where you are, stop comparing yourself to others and start focusing on making small amounts of progress by trying to improve in a reaslistic manner. Try and go that little bit longer or faster from wherever you are. Keep a record and you will see through consistent effort you will improve. Just keep on doing that and you will go a long way.

    I have never felt embarassed by my lack of progress, it takes time, so patience and dtermination will get you a long way. Be your own biggest cheerleader and supporter. With weights you shouldnt be focusing on how heavy , but the correct form and taking in the information your friend is trying to help you with. Time out and stop stressing becayse you are making it harder than it need be.
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
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    SergeantSausage wrote: »
    It can't be avoided. Can't. We ALL get disvouraged.

    The key is to have the commitment to get through the discouraging times.

    Commitment and simple discipline.


    Along with just about everything else mentioned, especially this ^.


    OK, so you didn't hit the numbers/speed/whatever you wanted. Get on a solid, tried-and-true plan that will help get you to your goals. Of course, it's important to take a step back and figure out if your goals are reasonable.


    Set a reasonable goal.
    See that/where you need/want improvement.
    Find a plan that will help.
    FOLLOW IT - DON'T TRY TO CHANGE WHAT IS KNOWN TO WORK.
    Succeed.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,576 Member
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    wils5150 wrote: »
    you are out there trying that puts you miles ahead of those that are still on the couch

    This ^^
  • yiscaht
    yiscaht Posts: 25 Member
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    Well done for getting out there and doing it! Keep going. It will get better. You will get stronger.

    I just started working out a few weeks ago and while I'll admit, I've been embarassed a few times at what I couldn't do, I'm becoming amazed now at what I can do! Things that were impossible week 1 are now not only possible, but I'm kind of rocking them lol. It's an awesome feeling. I've still got so far to go, but I'm off the couch and that in itself is an amazing feat!
  • DeguelloTex
    DeguelloTex Posts: 6,658 Member
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    Just try to do a little more next time. And the time after that. And so on.

    If you could squat 100 pounds last time but can do 105 this time, or can do one more rep at 100, that should be encouraging, not discouraging.
  • jcondeee
    jcondeee Posts: 72 Member
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    You have to start somewhere! Be positive, the beginning will be the hardest but in a month, I bet you'll be doing this with ease! Keep at it and having a support friend is great! You are on the right path!
  • crosbylee
    crosbylee Posts: 3,450 Member
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    I want to thank you for even starting this thread. I keep psyching myself out about even getting started. I like to lift and want to start. That needs to happen now, not when I decide to get over myself. You can do this. As others have said, we are all works in progress and we all have our own starting point. As the Sarge above says-- Just Do It.

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