Spider in my kitchen. Shall I slay it, or show mercy? You decide.

undergloom
undergloom Posts: 531 Member
in Chit-Chat
Alright, first-time homeowner, and I've got my first big creepy spider! I'm debating whether to murder it. Spiders eat bugs, which is helpful and something I just don't have the time to do myself. I feel like I could feasibly let him live here rent-free and be my spider roommate.
However - and this is where it gets personal - I was bitten on the neck by a damned Brown Recluse last year in a remote corner of the Pemigewasset Wilderness, and I'm still carrying a grudge. Spiders owe me $800 for the hospital stay, as well as restitution for cutting an epic hike short by two whole days.
Should this guy pay for others' sins? Is it bad karma for me to kill it, or is it karma biting him in the abdomen for his cousin's jerky behavior?
This is the hardest decision I've had to make all day, which goes to show you that I had a pretty darned easy day. I defer to the Chit-Chat section of the MFP forums to decide the fate of this tiny monster. What say you?
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Replies

  • SwedishSarah
    SwedishSarah Posts: 4,350 Member
    Show mercy!
    Be careful, and try to make sure it isn't poisonous like the previous spider that bit you. Trap it with a clear cup (so you can see where it is underneath) and slip a magazine under to hold it, then throw it outside.
  • GreenGoddess22
    GreenGoddess22 Posts: 3,821 Member
    Dude, just burn the house down!
  • kbkat7
    kbkat7 Posts: 28 Member
    leave the house immediately do not return..
  • undergloom
    undergloom Posts: 531 Member
    Ok, so I ran outside, but I saw another spider out there. Nowhere is safe.
  • SoulOfRusalka
    SoulOfRusalka Posts: 1,201 Member
    edited April 2015
    Mercy! It's not the spider's fault for acting like a spider. Also, the whole punishing-creatures-for-their-ancestors'-sins is so biblical (in the worst way possible). Unnecessary killing is... unnecessary, so it's probably best not to. And if there really is karma you might be reincarnated as a spider a few hundred times in retribution, which seems like a disproportionate risk just to punish a spider :P
    Also, I think spiders can be really cute. I say let the tiny monster live! It's preferable to bugs anyway.
  • earlnabby
    earlnabby Posts: 8,171 Member
    Kill the beast. If you don't, he will crawl all over you in the middle of the night. Do you really want to wake up with a spider in your mouth?
  • SomeGirlSomewhere
    SomeGirlSomewhere Posts: 937 Member
    I normally scoop spiders up on a piece of paper and toss them outside, but you specifically said it was a "big and creepy" spider...depending on the size of the thing I might not be so kind!
  • SoulOfRusalka
    SoulOfRusalka Posts: 1,201 Member
    edited April 2015
    If you still aren't convinced then here are pictures of jumping spiders wearing raindrops as tiny hats.
    jaetxsatok2f.jpg
    cd3zyxwpzcmd.jpg
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    MjAxMi03OTcyNjhkZDQxMDhkODU0.png
  • kbkat7
    kbkat7 Posts: 28 Member
    this could be the end
  • SomeGirlSomewhere
    SomeGirlSomewhere Posts: 937 Member
    SomeGirlSomewhere wrote: »
    I normally scoop spiders up on a piece of paper and toss them outside, but you specifically said it was a "big and creepy" spider...depending on the size of the thing I might not be so kind!

    I just realized the OP is a guy...man up and set the spider free outside!
  • haleklausen
    haleklausen Posts: 1,857 Member
    Kill the creepy thing
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    truly though, if you are serious about opinions, mine is firmly on compassion. be the better creature and seek not revenge. "While seeking revenge, dig two graves - one for yourself."
    Douglas Horton
  • undergloom
    undergloom Posts: 531 Member
    LadyAbsynthe wrote: »
    If you still aren't convinced then here are pictures of jumping spiders wearing raindrops as tiny hats.
    jaetxsatok2f.jpg
    cd3zyxwpzcmd.jpg

    This is adorable
    SomeGirlSomewhere wrote: »
    I just realized the OP is a guy...man up and set the spider free outside!

    I'm trying to think of a manly way to do this.
  • softblondechick
    softblondechick Posts: 1,276 Member
    Kill.

    Call an exterminator tomorrow. One could be a hundred. Your home could be infested with spiders in the walls and duct system.

    Get a cat, they are killers and will do spider hunting and deal with the death penalty. Just don't kiss the cat on the lips.
  • undergloom
    undergloom Posts: 531 Member
    Ok, "murder" is about tied with "set it free". Surprisingly, "make it my roommate" is dead last.

    I believe I will blow smoke from an Oliva Serie V Melanio cigar towards it, forcing it in the direction of an open window, all while wearing a black beaverskin cowboy hat and playing "Spidey's Wild Ride" by Tom Waits on the stereo. This is the manliest way that I can think of to solve this.
  • JeopardyRight
    JeopardyRight Posts: 331 Member
    What if YOU were a spider sir? Show mercy. Unless its venomous, then crush it, burn it and spit on it.
  • haleklausen
    haleklausen Posts: 1,857 Member
    All I know is if it crawls anywhere near me it's getting the boot

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