Friends not believing in cico

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Replies

  • dolliesdaughter
    dolliesdaughter Posts: 544 Member
    edited April 2015
    She isn't sick and tired of being sick and tired. When she is, she will do something. She is still the looking for an easy way out phase.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    kimreagan87 wrote: »
    my friend just text me she said I inspired her to loose some weight. She said she went out and get all this healthy food. It's all super healthy but it's all high calorie. She told me what she ate yesterday and while it was super healthy her calories were really high. and she doesn't exercise but she won't believe me that she needs to cut her calories to lose weight not just eat better. She wants me to help her but then argues with me when I try

    I would tell her that the way you lost weight and the only way you know to lose weight is to eat at a calorie deficit no matter what food a person eats. It is great that she is choosing nutritious food. I would avoid the labels healthy and unhealthy and talk about nutrition instead. I would tell her that eating plenty of protein, fiber, fats and drinking water will help her stay satisfied. I would tell her that she doesn't have to cut foods from her diet to lose weight just eat smaller portions of higher calorie stuff. If she wants help figuring out how many calories she should eat and tracking them there are great tools like MFP that make it easy. If she wants to argue that she doesn't need to consider calories or wants to do something else then she is on her own. Good luck to her.
  • slideaway1
    slideaway1 Posts: 1,006 Member
    Sometimes you just have to let people learn their own way, and then once they believe in it, they have to bothered/disciplined to implement it. It's survival of the fittest.
  • s2mikey
    s2mikey Posts: 146 Member
    Yeah - its pretty much CICO. However, with a fairly rigorous workout schedule and some strength training, you CAN certainly eat more and lose some weight or at least recompose with more lean muscle. Not saying you can "out-exercise" a large calorie surplus but very active people who are lean have insane metabolisms and "burn through" calories like flames versus paper.

    So - what Im saying is that she can NOT do what shes doing and lose weight. She'll have to incorporate weight lifting and solid cardio for it work at all.
  • rwhawkes
    rwhawkes Posts: 117 Member
    edited April 2015
    There's a lot of anecdotal evidence and strong opinion on MFP, but my experience is that the only way to lose weight is to pay attention to CICO. That is the one universal principle.
  • Tedebearduff
    Tedebearduff Posts: 1,155 Member
    kimreagan87 wrote: »
    my friend just text me she said I inspired her to loose some weight. She said she went out and get all this healthy food. It's all super healthy but it's all high calorie. She told me what she ate yesterday and while it was super healthy her calories were really high. and she doesn't exercise but she won't believe me that she needs to cut her calories to lose weight not just eat better. She wants me to help her but then argues with me when I try

    Tell her to go do some research herself before you help her, I normally tell people that. After being asked for 500 times what my secret was or sitting down and making meal plans for ppl at work ... or friends .. and having none of them follow it.. I realized I was just wasting my time so I ask others to put in some mental work before I try and help them at all.
  • MyaPapaya75
    MyaPapaya75 Posts: 3,143 Member
    I wouldnt waste my time......lol the energy wasted on her can be better put to use on yourself
  • EvanKeel
    EvanKeel Posts: 1,904 Member
    There's really no point in having a debate with her about it.

    (sarcasm)If she knows so much, then her success will no doubt be forthcoming. (/sarcasm)

    If she doesn't believe you, fine. It's no skin off your nose if she doesn't lose any weight.
  • slideaway1
    slideaway1 Posts: 1,006 Member
    s2mikey wrote: »
    Yeah - its pretty much CICO. However, with a fairly rigorous workout schedule and some strength training, you CAN certainly eat more and lose some weight or at least recompose with more lean muscle. Not saying you can "out-exercise" a large calorie surplus but very active people who are lean have insane metabolisms and "burn through" calories like flames versus paper.

    So - what Im saying is that she can NOT do what shes doing and lose weight. She'll have to incorporate weight lifting and solid cardio for it work at all.

    I agree. I used to run 10 mile a day (for two years) and create a 1200 cal deficit a day which helped for weight loss and allowed me to eat lots of anything I wanted, but it's not very sustainable for the rest of your life. I think it's better to get your diet/nutrition on point (without being overly strict) and then add in exercise (for health) and eat back a portion of those cals if you wish.
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
    We must have the same friend. LOL.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Her results will speak for themselves. Refuse to argue with her.
  • hsmith0930
    hsmith0930 Posts: 160 Member
    Sucks to be her. I mean, if there was any real way to lose weight without going through the rigamarole of counting calories and staying within my goals I'd be doing it, everyone would. But there is no magical cure. There are some tools people like to use to create their deficit, and if it makes them happy, well, kudos. I find that eating "healthier" foods makes it a bit easier for me to stay in my calorie goals because I tend to pick things that are more filling but have fewer calories. So a cup of Pineapple will keep me fuller longer than a cup of ice cream and has a lot fewer calories. But I use it as a tool to meet my CI goal, not a way to get around it.
  • snowflakesav
    snowflakesav Posts: 649 Member
    No worry about what your friend is doing or thinking. Be honest with her that you don't think that is the plan you would recommend following for success. Just keep on being her friend and supporting her.

    If she wants your help you can offer her support in other ways...like going for a bike ride or walk together to burn some calories.

    If people don't seem to get it...I recommend that they find a person they know who has lost and maintains their weight and use them as a role model (not someone in a magazine)

    More important to be a good friend than to be right about weight loss methodology. The less judgemental you are about your friends and family...the less judgemental you will be on yourself.
  • DirrtyH
    DirrtyH Posts: 664 Member
    rocknlotsofrolls wrote: »
    I didn't believe it when my mom and dad told me that my 1st boyfriend growing up would not jump in a well and save me if I fell in! Did I believe them? Heck no! Some people just have to find out the hard way!

    If he jumped in the well, how would that help you? Is he jumping in with a rope tied around his waist like Westley going after Buttercup in the fire swamp? I'm confused.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,668 Member
    We all have these friends - those who see our results, ask about it, then don't believe us when we tell them. I've given up trying to convince them.
  • slideaway1
    slideaway1 Posts: 1,006 Member
    hsmith0930 wrote: »
    Sucks to be her. I mean, if there was any real way to lose weight without going through the rigamarole of counting calories and staying within my goals I'd be doing it, everyone would. But there is no magical cure. There are some tools people like to use to create their deficit, and if it makes them happy, well, kudos. I find that eating "healthier" foods makes it a bit easier for me to stay in my calorie goals because I tend to pick things that are more filling but have fewer calories. So a cup of Pineapple will keep me fuller longer than a cup of ice cream and has a lot fewer calories. But I use it as a tool to meet my CI goal, not a way to get around it.

    I don't log calories or measure/weigh food. Eventually you will get so good at it that you will pretty accurately be able to guess the cals/macros etc of food just by looking at it on the plate. Life gets loads easier.

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