People can be so unnerving...

Leana088

SLLRunner wrote: »

Liftng4Lis wrote: »

Tell her nothing and tend to yourself. Unless you're with her 24/7, you have no idea what she's eating.

This.

Leana, why do you care about your friend's diet?

She's like a sister to me. I don't want to see her mess up her body. But they're right. It's not my place. Unfortunately. I'll just try to lead by example.

blossomingbutterfly

Karen_libert wrote: »

All you can do is share your knowledge. What she does with it is her business. If you do well and enjoy your diet she may want to copy you. If not, it's up to her.

This.

williamwj2014

Worry about yourself please. You have good intentions in caring about your friends health but you also come off as trying to control her and have her do it your way. Just stop.

brower47

Leana088 wrote: »

The frustrating part is she's two glasses of milk away from eating the same amount as me, but nope. Stubborn.

Why do you want her to eat the same amount as you? I think you need to back off. She's a grown woman. I'd get irritated with any of my friends if they started nit picing my diet.

callsitlikeiseeit

despite my comment, i do understand.

when we start to better ourselves, we want our loved ones to do the same for THEMSELVES. Unfortunately, our journey is not theirs- and vice versa.

My neighbor constantly whines about not losing weight yet she doesnt monitor her intake at all, doesnt work out, etc etc . She knows how i do things and how its working for me. shes choosing her own path.No matter how much i want her to succeed, it is HER journey, not mine.

Spyer116

So you're asking advice on how to be an even more nosey / in-your-face / controlling 'friend'? Its her diet. If she prefers to not exercise and eat less, thats her choice. At 5 foot, her bmr can hardly be that high. So being at 1-1.1k calories / day with little or no exercise isn't that bad.
Just because she prefers to go about her weightloss differently than you, with different tastes in food or happy with eating a small variety, is none of your concern.

maidentl

I'm just surprised that so many people hate chicken breasts. Am I the only one who likes them? :huh:

brendak76

OP, I don't know if you have a spouse or significant other in your life, but maybe you can take the comments in this thread as a learning experience so this doesn't happen in a relationship. I can't imagine what my life would look like if I tried to monitor my husbands caloric intake like that or if he tried to monitor mine. It would not be pretty. Even with your best intentions for your friend at heart, monitoring another persons food intake does not make for a healthy relationship. Learning to give up control of the things you shouldn't and don't have control of in the first place is a lesson well learned.

healthygreek

maidentl wrote: »

I'm just surprised that so many people hate chicken breasts. Am I the only one who likes them? :huh:

Chicken thighs are more tender, juicy and flavorful IMO.

allaboutthecake

Sisters are bossy....even the taller ones.

Leana088

Wow this thread sure turned out interesting while I wasn't here.

For the record, I never said anything to her. I was just thinking among myself.

Also:

newmeadow wrote: »

I think it's sad though that young healthy people like OP are pre-occupied with the imagined effects of perfectly healthy food in reasonable amounts on "health". Precisely at the healthiest times of their young lives and the lives of their friends.

Media induced brainwashing. Too bad.

Wuut??

Sorry. English is my second language.

Leana088

newmeadow wrote: »

Leana088 wrote: »

Wow this thread sure turned out interesting while I wasn't here.

For the record, I never said anything to her. I was just thinking among myself.

Also:

newmeadow wrote: »

I think it's sad though that young healthy people like OP are pre-occupied with the imagined effects of perfectly healthy food in reasonable amounts on "health". Precisely at the healthiest times of their young lives and the lives of their friends.

Media induced brainwashing. Too bad.

Wuut??

Sorry. English is my second language.

I'll put it this way. You are the picture of glowing vibrant health and in your early to mid twenties if I remember correctly because you mentioned your age in one of your other discussions. Your friend probably falls into the same category.

Yet in your posts about your friend, you repeatedly mention concerns for her "health" as it relates to what she's eating and how much she's eating. To me it sounds like she's eating good food in reasonable amounts.

Health is constantly harped on in the media and consequently, the general public is all wigged out about it. It's one thing for a middle aged or elderly person with chronic health abnormalities to be worried about health, but...

Personally, unless someone your age is already sick, I don't think you should be concerned about her health at all. Because she's healthy and she will probably stay that way throughout her 20s and 30s and maybe even her 40s without having to do anything special at all. Just my perspective.

The reason I was worried about it is because she's eating 1000-1100 calories a day. The minimum number for a short, sedentary woman is 1200. And even then it's difficult to get adequate nutrition without being really careful.

You're right. She's strong now. But if she messes things up with her body she can feel the effects of it when she's older.

Mistraal1981

I can't see a single thing wrong with what she is eating. Fish, chicken, veg in reasonable portion sizes for a sedentary shorty. Come see us again when your friend is eating her body weight in donuts and pizza and washing it all down with the equivalent of a full bathtub worth of cola. Only then will I be able to see there is cause for concern.

Leana088

Mistraal1981 wrote: »

I can't see a single thing wrong with what she is eating. Fish, chicken, veg in reasonable portion sizes for a sedentary shorty. Come see us again when your friend is eating her body weight in donuts and pizza and washing it all down with the equivalent of a full bathtub worth of cola. Only then will I be able to see there is cause for concern.

Sounds heavenly...maybe I should try that...Lol

maidentl

Also, you say you don't know how many almonds she eats. She could easily eat 100 more calories than you think in almonds and be at 1200.

Leana088

Right then. I'll stop worrying. Good night MFP !

brower47

maidentl wrote: »

I'm just surprised that so many people hate chicken breasts. Am I the only one who likes them? :huh:

I love breasts. But I love thighs, too.

lillyrose2020

For what it's worth I think you're being a decent friend by showing concern and asking for the communities thoughts, that is what its here for.
I'm worried about a family members eating habits at the moment (extremely restricted diet <800 per day, excessive laxative use, possible ED, very thin) so I know how it feels to be worried about someone you care about.

jennifershoo

I'm more concerned about chicken cooked in light margarine...Barf!!!!!

rainbowbow

Dear god, i am so glad i don't have a friend on MFP pronouncing to the world how "unhealthy" they think i am because they've been overanalyzing my food choices.

bejeezus.



Nice answer: go! OP, please focus your efforts on the things within your control. In life, there is only one person whom we can control and that is ourselves. Not your partner, nor friends, nor family, can be controlled. Their actions (and said consequences) are their own personal problems and separate from you and your life.

Trying to control others eating habits, feelings, vices, etc. is only going to lead to personal dissapointment. Let it go.

If you are truly concerned that her HEALTH is at risk, then approach her about it from that angle and provide her means to seek guidance and help. She doesn't have to do anything because you suggest it.

I truly wonder though, are you concerned because she is lighter than you and it brings up your own insecurities? Or do you act this same way everytime your friends, partners, family members, etc. eat mcdonalds for lunch? Or order pizza? Or do anything else that is "unhealthy?" Or are you only concerned because she DOESN'T eat junk?

SoulOfRusalka

.

snowflakesav

I don't see anything wrong with what she is doing. I couldn't eat that low fat.

SergeantSausage

None of your beeswax.

Nor ours.

iwantmydenimback

How about your friend is a grown woman who is supporting herself, feeding herself, and in good health, so you can go ahead and stop mothering her and trying to force changes in her already healthy habits?