How to cook for 4 people when I am the only one that wants to be healthy.
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If my wife tried this with me, she would be out on her ear, regardless of how much I love her!! LOL
If you love your husband and he is out working as hard as he is, then doesn't he deserve to have what he wants to replenish his body? You don't say if you are at work as well though? If not, then give them what they want and have a smaller amount of what they do and (as my wife does) cooks a few vegetables that she wants separately. Carrots & broccoli can be cooked in the same pan of water so it is ONE extra pan that is no hassle at all to have on a hob. You get the additional bits you want, and the men are kept happy. Problem solved & common sense prevails!!!!0 -
I'm still working on this but asked my trainer this same question about a a month ago. She said food prep is a big help. She preps food on Sunday's (chicken, rice, vegetables, etc.) that way no matter what the menu she will always have her food. Say everyone has chicken one night as the main meat, you can eat your quinoa and vegetables that you already prepped earlier in the week while they eat the potatoes. If you have burgers make yours out of leaner meats. Breaded chicken parmesan? Pan cook or grill yours instead. I also keep frozen mixed vegetables (california blend is delicious) in the freezer for me to microwave.0
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That works with kids. Adults have money and will go out and buy something else to eat and more than likely have animosity created between each other at dinner time.This is how i'd deal with it. I'd make the food i want and i'd say "this is what i made for dinner." If someone says, "i don't want that" i'd use the same line my grandma used to tell me, "well don't eat."
The OP is trying to lose weight, not the others. No reason to insist putting them on the same "health kick" as the others.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Agreed!0 -
marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.0 -
hollyrayburn wrote: »
Or go out and buy something else. Not unusual for men to do rather than argue. The standoff approach rarely works when it comes to food.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Then they're free to do so, IMHO. I work long hours, i'm active in my job. And I come home and cook. Generally, BF is satisfied with what I make, so I don't have that issue. But, were than an issue, i'd point him to the bread and sandwich meats.
Oh nevermind...0 -
Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling.
LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!0 -
hollyrayburn wrote: »Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling. LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!
I do see your point, however, OP did make the point that she is the cook for all these people. We could, of course, take it a step further, and ask if she works, who shops, etc. That would provide the bigger picture. Assuming does get us nowhere.0 -
Steph38878 wrote: »My husband, too, works hard. I basically will fry whatever meat then bake or grill mine. I roast, grill or steam veggies or for my side or eat smaller portions of the other.
I know what justifies healthy is a big debate. I have high cholesterol so I try to limit fried foods. As far as eat it, or go hungry. Well, in my opinion (just mine), my husband works hard to provide for our family so I try to make him an enjoyable meal. Just because I'm cutting back on calories and eating different doesn't mean he has to also.
This. I have the same opinion and I work full-time outside the house the same as my husband and have two older teen boys at home. Luckily though I can get away with not alot of frying since for years I always baked things and now that it's warm weather I grill alot. Glad to see I'm not the only one without the "if you don't shop/cook you eat what I serve mentality".
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hollyrayburn wrote: »Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling. LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!
I do see your point, however, OP did make the point that she is the cook for all these people. We could, of course, take it a step further, and ask if she works, who shops, etc. That would provide the bigger picture. Assuming does get us nowhere.
Yeah, and I haven't noticed that she's come back yet. Perhaps just quietly stalking our somewhat heated responses, lol.
Again, the above was simply my opinion, and my life. There's plenty of suggestions in the thread! my SO has bee out of town; it's time like this that I save my tofu or sushi or avocado based meals, since he doesn't care for those. I'm really not munching on tuna and screaming at him to make his own food. But the time he said he preffered my spaghetti with beef instead of turkey, I mentioned that we have a ton of sandwich makings. 0 -
hollyrayburn wrote: »Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling. LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!
I work 50 plus hours a week too...I still do most of the cooking and make sure the food I make for my men is what they will like and eat because they work hard and need it.
When my husband is on his down shift he makes food he knows we all like too...ie tonight bbq'd hb with cheese bacon guac with greek pasta salad...I will eat it just not as much as they do.
If it was fried chicken I would eat it...just not as much as him or my son.
The only time I cook seafood (which my husband doesn't like) is when he is working night shift...it's call allowing for compromise with your partner, hard working husband who btw maintains on about 3500 a day and my son on 4k a day...
you are missing the point really....0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »I haven't seen anyone suggest this, but it might help. I make a lot of meals in bulk, then freeze or refrigerate leftovers so that I can eat it several times over (not necessarily the same meal every day). When I don't have enough calories to eat the same meal as my husband (or if I'm eating by myself that day, or if I don't feel like cooking, whatever) I'll heat up one of those and eat that instead of whatever I made for him. It saves me from making two meals, and gives me more variety, since he doesn't like some of the foods that I like.
This also. Many people I work out with do the food prep over the weekend too.
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hollyrayburn wrote: »hollyrayburn wrote: »Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling. LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!
I do see your point, however, OP did make the point that she is the cook for all these people. We could, of course, take it a step further, and ask if she works, who shops, etc. That would provide the bigger picture. Assuming does get us nowhere.
Yeah, and I haven't noticed that she's come back yet. Perhaps just quietly stalking our somewhat heated responses, lol.
Again, the above was simply my opinion, and my life. There's plenty of suggestions in the thread! my SO has bee out of town; it's time like this that I save my tofu or sushi or avocado based meals, since he doesn't care for those. I'm really not munching on tuna and screaming at him to make his own food. But the time he said he preffered my spaghetti with beef instead of turkey, I mentioned that we have a ton of sandwich makings.
lol.... I slipped turkey into several things I make and it turns out my hubs likes them just as much or better with the turkey, so we've made the switch. I will admit there have been times I've made the offer for him to find something that suits him if he doesn't like what I took out of the freezer for the evening.
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RunRutheeRun wrote: »If you are the cook in your house then tough cookie for them, they have to eat what you make
keep presenting them with new foods/veg etc, they'll be eating everything before you know it
Uhm, they are three grown men who bust their a$$es all day, I really don't think they will be satisfied eating veggies and new foods. They want their meat and potatoes. If we were talking about small children, then I would agree with your advice.
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hollyrayburn wrote: »
Or go out and buy something else. Not unusual for men to do rather than argue. The standoff approach rarely works when it comes to food.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Then they're free to do so, IMHO. I work long hours, i'm active in my job. And I come home and cook. Generally, BF is satisfied with what I make, so I don't have that issue. But, were than an issue, i'd point him to the bread and sandwich meats.
Per her profile, she travels with her boyfriend. My guess is she's not out working long hours and her job is to take care of the family, meaning cook for her bf along with his dad and uncle. It's completely reasonable for them to expect her to make them food they like/want.
Thank you for paying attention lol. I do not work. The guys work 12 hours/day at the moment, but they will be working 16 hours/day pretty soon. The do this for months at a time with no off days. I don't feel like I have to do anything, I do this for them because they work hard. My bf's dad and uncle do not travel with their wives. His dad and uncle give me $100/each, each week to get groceries. My cooking for them isn't the problem I have. It's cooking for them, and change my eating habits. I'm not trying to change theirs. I don't "owe" them anything, I do it out of the kindness of my heart.
Someone suggested a food scale, do those really help? When I calorie counted before, a few years ago, I was single. I ate frozen "health" entrees, things like that. Anything that had calories on the label was easy. But it's hard to measure calories for something you've cooked. Does that make sense?
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wretchedeinstein wrote: »hollyrayburn wrote: »
Or go out and buy something else. Not unusual for men to do rather than argue. The standoff approach rarely works when it comes to food.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Then they're free to do so, IMHO. I work long hours, i'm active in my job. And I come home and cook. Generally, BF is satisfied with what I make, so I don't have that issue. But, were than an issue, i'd point him to the bread and sandwich meats.
Per her profile, she travels with her boyfriend. My guess is she's not out working long hours and her job is to take care of the family, meaning cook for her bf along with his dad and uncle. It's completely reasonable for them to expect her to make them food they like/want.
Thank you for paying attention lol. I do not work. The guys work 12 hours/day at the moment, but they will be working 16 hours/day pretty soon. The do this for months at a time with no off days. I don't feel like I have to do anything, I do this for them because they work hard. My bf's dad and uncle do not travel with their wives. His dad and uncle give me $100/each, each week to get groceries. My cooking for them isn't the problem I have. It's cooking for them, and change my eating habits. I'm not trying to change theirs. I don't "owe" them anything, I do it out of the kindness of my heart.
Someone suggested a food scale, do those really help? When I calorie counted before, a few years ago, I was single. I ate frozen "health" entrees, things like that. Anything that had calories on the label was easy. But it's hard to measure calories for something you've cooked. Does that make sense?
Oh, yes. You can't be accurate on calorie counts without one. you need to weigh foods prior to cooking them.
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hollyrayburn wrote: »hollyrayburn wrote: »Scenario.
If the one that was attempting a more nutrious lifestyle worked many hours a day, and the eats more calorie person(I won't say unhealthy-food eating, since I look at no food as unhealthy) was preparing the meals, and they always made butter-laden potatoes, fried chicken, cheesecakes, rolls, macaroni, etc, should the person that needs less calories eat what they have prepared for them, or should meal-maker be required to buy/prepare other foods, because they don't like that? Not trying to ruffle feathers, I am just curious. I feel that a person who requires/wants a higher calorie meal plan would not be as accomodating. Not sure, though.marilandica wrote: »Either they eat what you put on the table or they cook for themselves.
Wow, you must be so caring and loving. These men have serious caloric needs based on the work that they do. If she's going to take on the responsibility of cooking for everyone, she needs to make sure they meet those caloric needs. There are ways to cook meat and potatoes without them being considered what some would label 'unhealthy'. They can have larger portions and she can have smaller portions. I can't eat a lot of foods, so I make different meals for myself and my husband. Or, as many have suggested, she can make salad for herself to go along with the meal. There are workarounds for every situation, if a person is willing to take the time.
I am. four years together, including in the same dwelling. LIke I said, I generally don't have that issue. When I make his burger, I don't put lettuce and tomato on it like I do mine, since he does not like those veggies. His stuff has some extra cheese on it, because he's a little rat, lol. If I have a salad planned, he will make a sandwich or order pizza.
If OP does not work, then no, I don't see an issue with perhaps preparing her stuff in a way that gives her less calories. But if all someone wants is meats/taters, they best be helping with the grocery bill....and the dishwashing!
I do see your point, however, OP did make the point that she is the cook for all these people. We could, of course, take it a step further, and ask if she works, who shops, etc. That would provide the bigger picture. Assuming does get us nowhere.
Yeah, and I haven't noticed that she's come back yet. Perhaps just quietly stalking our somewhat heated responses, lol.
Again, the above was simply my opinion, and my life. There's plenty of suggestions in the thread! my SO has bee out of town; it's time like this that I save my tofu or sushi or avocado based meals, since he doesn't care for those. I'm really not munching on tuna and screaming at him to make his own food. But the time he said he preffered my spaghetti with beef instead of turkey, I mentioned that we have a ton of sandwich makings.
lol.... I slipped turkey into several things I make and it turns out my hubs likes them just as much or better with the turkey, so we've made the switch. I will admit there have been times I've made the offer for him to find something that suits him if he doesn't like what I took out of the freezer for the evening.
lolol. I've tried that whole turkey switcharoo thing. It didn't work.0 -
Do you guys think my problem could be "semi-solved" by going vegan? What I mean is, do you think it'd just make things easier for me?0
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Why don't you use lean ground beef instead of turkey? I use turkey and always have because I hate the smell of beef when it cooks, and it's cheap!0
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Queenmunchy wrote: »Why don't you use lean ground beef instead of turkey? I use turkey and always have because I hate the smell of beef when it cooks, and it's cheap!
I already do
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wretchedeinstein wrote: »Do you guys think my problem could be "semi-solved" by going vegan? What I mean is, do you think it'd just make things easier for me?
Why? Just do smaller portions of meat, you need the protein. The only reason people go vegan is for beliefs or if they can't eat meat for some reason. Or don't like it.0
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