Can you believe your significant other?

Options
2

Replies

  • Boogage
    Boogage Posts: 739 Member
    Options
    My partner has always said I look good. I don't believe him lol.

    I think he prefers me when I'm bigger anyway. I don't really understand it but I know he doesn't like other people to say I look good so maybe he thinks I'll run off with someone else!
  • zephtalah
    zephtalah Posts: 327 Member
    Options
    Yes, I can believe him. He is VERY honest. I don't set him up for failure (asking questions I don't want the truth for), but when I ask him a blunt question he gives me a blunt answer. I would rather have that then someone who lies to me to make me falsely feel better.
  • bgelliott
    bgelliott Posts: 610 Member
    Options
    My husband and I are brutally honest with each other and it's wonderful. When I was fat, he told me I was fat and he knew it would not hurt my feelings because it was the truth. Had he not been honest I may not have been motivated to get my butt in gear!

    I don't understand why women ask this question if they are not happy with a truthful answer. I have several friends who are very unhappy with the appearance of their overweight spouses but when asked their input, they are not 100% truthful because it has caused many a fights in the past.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Options
    i dont get much feedback, and have quit asking. I'm always surprised when he compliments. he says he doesnt notice a change in my weight, but I dont either.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    Options
    My husband is totally honest. He says my boobs need work cause they're a little saggy (which is ok, they got ruined from nursing. We're going to get them lifted when we're done having kids) but he says my butt, thighs and abs look even better than when we were dating. And I believe him. I have before-and-after pics, and too-large jeans as proof. :)

    typos
  • vhuber
    vhuber Posts: 8,779 Member
    Options
    I'll admit that I ALWAYS think I look fat. It is something that is very hard to not think when you have been chubby or fat most of your life even though you have been in all sorts of sports & fitness. I don't always believe my husband but I am getting better. I do tell him when his gut is getting mushy & he get's busy & starts eating less. He does NOT like fitness like I do but he does very laborous work that slims him down. I want to know the TRUTH even if it hurts!!!!
  • lesspaul
    lesspaul Posts: 190 Member
    Options
    Tip for guys regarding the classic loaded question from your beloved of "Does this dress make me look fat?"

    It is a trick question. Neither a yes nor a no will go unpunished.

    Even the seemingly innocent "You look great in that dress," or "That dress looks good on you" replies have pitfalls. You might be caught unawares with her reply of "Oh, so what do I look like normally? Chopped liver?" or "So it is the dress that looks good, not me?"

    The only correct answer is: Only YOU could make THAT dress look THAT good.

    You can thank me later.
  • carriespence1
    carriespence1 Posts: 70 Member
    Options
    My hubby only answers when I ask he also tells the truth! I don't pull that set up thing though either. When I'm less than my best he doesn't complain or seem unhappy with me either. He is a real mans man but has told me before " its you I love no matter what" sometimes I could just kiss him
  • MrsJ1105
    MrsJ1105 Posts: 34 Member
    Options
    My husband is very, very honest. Very. He will tell me if i look good, bad, whatever. I definitely believe him.
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
    Options
    My boyfriend is very supportive of me, and while he's honest, he doesn't slap my hand when I reach for ice cream or tell me I shouldn't have something. He lets me make my own decisions... however, since he's not aiming to lose weight himself, nor place any restrictions on his diet, so there's where the problems come in.

    He'll eat whatever I cook, but when we go grocery shopping he still wants to pick out Swiss Rolls, chips, frozen burritos, and the like. Which he's fully entitled to eat, but man, it makes it hard for me not to go overboard on those things! If I had it my way they'd be out of the house and only purchased on a special occasion, but, I'm just trying to develop stronger willpower.

    But he is proud of me for what I'm doing, he likes going on walks with me (and it's finally warm enough for the outdoor pool, so we're gonna do that together too), and he's quite liberal with the compliments whenever I'm feeling sexy. And often times when I'm not, too.

    He called me pretty when I was supersick with a cold... I can't really ask for more than that! :heart:
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    Options
    i love when my s.o. will ask with a straight face if some random super model is prettier than she is. my first thought is "she's messing with me right"?
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    Options
    well i know i'm not fat,
    but i like to ask BFs if they think i am,
    just to see the look of utter panic on their faces :devil:
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Options
    My husband is honest with me because he knows that's what I want. I work very hard on my fitness. I have a low bodyfat, my weight and BMI are low, I have visible muscle definition, and I am healthy and look healthy. If I ask, if there is a little bit of fat right here? He will say, "Yes, there is a little bit of fat right there". He is kind and he helps me also to see myself realistically because sometimes I zero in on the little bit of fat and think it is more than it is. He explained to me that it is not as much as I seem to think it is. But, he also doesn't want me to think I'm crazy. I'm not stupid. I know I have a little bit of fat on a part of my thighs (the way most women do). I have 18% bodyfat or so. I'm not down in the 11-15% range. And I'm ok with that.

    If I ask him how something looks on me I want an honest opinion. I'm not going to spend money on something that doesn't look good on me. And I don't want to walk around looking bad or being deluded. I want to look good and feel good. If I can't count on my husband to tell me, then who can I count on?

    It is important to know that I can trust my husband, so I prefer honesty. I'm honest with myself and I want the same from him.

    If a person wants their significant other to not be honest with them, they are probably also not being fully honest with themselves either.

    Because my husband is honest with me, it also means I can trust his compliments as well. I also know from all of my experience with him that he is indeed attracted to me and my body. Also when he looks at naked women, he looks at women that have a body type like mine (not that that is a frequent occurrence or anything, just the normal amount).

    Sometimes I do think that my husband sees me as being more attractive than I see myself. But, he (and others) say I am too hard on myself. And when I am on a good day, I do see what he sees. But, even if my husband does see me different than I see myself, that does not mean he is being dishonest. He is being honest, even if he could be wrong. He is honest about how he sees me. That does not mean other people see me that way (even though he thinks they do).
  • jennyrebekka
    jennyrebekka Posts: 626 Member
    Options
    well i know i'm not fat,
    but i like to ask BFs if they think i am,
    just to see the look of utter panic on their faces :devil:

    sadistic! and probably very entertaining
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Options
    He thinks I am far too hard on myself, so honestly I try not to ask him. I try to trust the fact that to him I am the most beautiful woman.
    I tell him that I'd like to lose 10lbs, he says "from where" so I'll take it.
    I'm nowhere near overweight and he is a a bit. So honestly I think the more I say I look fat and terrible it makes him feel like "I wonder what she thinks of me"....

    So I just trust.
  • alladream
    alladream Posts: 261 Member
    Options
    My partner is sweet but says literally that he would think I am beautiful even if I weighed 500 pounds, which is nice, but is no help at all when I weigh far far less than that but am still heavier than I want to be. So, the affection is nice, but no good for a reality check.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    Options
    well i know i'm not fat,
    but i like to ask BFs if they think i am,
    just to see the look of utter panic on their faces :devil:

    sadistic! and probably very entertaining
    i'm horrid, it's endearing.
  • zephtalah
    zephtalah Posts: 327 Member
    Options
    Tip for guys regarding the classic loaded question from your beloved of "Does this dress make me look fat?"

    It is a trick question. Neither a yes nor a no will go unpunished.

    Even the seemingly innocent "You look great in that dress," or "That dress looks good on you" replies have pitfalls. You might be caught unawares with her reply of "Oh, so what do I look like normally? Chopped liver?" or "So it is the dress that looks good, not me?"

    The only correct answer is: Only YOU could make THAT dress look THAT good.

    You can thank me later.

    Why? What's wrong with the dress? :laugh:
  • mkakids
    mkakids Posts: 1,913 Member
    Options
    If I ask him how something looks on me I want an honest opinion. I'm not going to spend money on something that doesn't look good on me. And I don't want to walk around looking bad or being deluded. I want to look good and feel good. If I can't count on my husband to tell me, then who can I count on?

    I agree with this. He thinks im beautiful even when I dont see it. I never ask "am I fat?", but I do ask "does this top look good?" Or "which top looks better?" Sometimes a second opinion is needed.

    Eta...my husband needs to lose weight too. He is about 50lbs overweight, and while I still love him, I found him much more physically attractive when he was lighter. I would never tell him he is fat or has to lose weight. He knows he is (as I know I am as well) and we are both working on it.
  • skparker2
    skparker2 Posts: 132
    Options
    Mines really supportive like for example right at this moment hes sitting infront of me eating my ben & jerrys ice cream describing how good every spoonful is :tongue:

    Sounds JUST like my boyfriend! He's all like, "Parker, you don't need that---that's what I ATE it."

    Makes me wanna SMACK him! <3