Men and Women have different discussions..........

ninerbuff
ninerbuff Posts: 48,989 Member
Okay while getting a haircut today (and being the only one in the shop at the time) the female cutting my hair and her peer, both at least 35 years old, were conversing about their work and people they work with. Lots of "I can't stand her" and "I don't like her" and basic criticism of other females were the topics of conversation between the two. Now some will say it's just a single incident, but I've noticed this with other salons I've gotten my haircut at when females carry on conversations with other females.
If I get it done at a barber shop (rarity since there are hardly any around), the males talk about sports and cut up on each other with laughter amongst all.

So I gotta feel this has an effect on how females view themselves whenever they are assessing themselves.

This is just my observation from experiences I have getting my haircut done in salons. Usually my brother cuts my hair, but on occasion I'll hit up salons in town.

Thoughts?

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
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Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Replies

  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    It's true. Women can be really mean and nasty to each other.








    But I blame men for that.
  • brandiuntz
    brandiuntz Posts: 2,717 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    I've observed men teasing each other relentlessly, and laugh it off. But, at times, it comes across as downright insulting and mean-spirited. I'm just as curious why men kid with each other like that, as you'll rarely find women teasing each other as such.
  • MNA76
    MNA76 Posts: 1,541
    It's true. Women can be really mean and nasty to each other.








    But I blame men for that.



    Ha!! QFT
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Ugh go to a different hair salon if they are talking over you like cackling and gossiping like 12year old school girls. Very unprofessional.

    I know big gossipy women and men though.
  • bonitacash08
    bonitacash08 Posts: 378 Member
    I think we all talk about the same things.. Just in different ways.

    For example:

    Work Related Grievances
    Me: I can't stand Susie. She's always making passive aggressive comments about my work and I hate the way she says the opposite of what I do at staff meetings.

    Him: *Punches Bob in the face and walks away*

    Housework
    Me: Last night, I washed the dishes, folded and put away laundry, took the dog for a walk, fed, bathed and put the kids to sleep and managed to catch my show. What do you think he did? He dropped his plate in the sink and watched TV for the rest of the night.

    Him: I'm learning, man. I care about her feelings. Last night, I put my plate in the sink for her. She didn't even have to do it for me!

    Kid's Accomplishments
    Me: Little Brenda can count to ten, sing her ABCs and 3 different nursery rhymes!

    Him: I taught Brenda how to pick her nose and wipe it on the dog last night.. I recorded it, wanna see?
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    Wait you've never had a gay man go into the mode? I worked with a gay man before and he would go on and on about how only pretty people should be allowed to work and all the ugly people should be sent on an island. He definitely would have sent me to the island in a heart beat.
  • brandiuntz
    brandiuntz Posts: 2,717 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    Wait you've never had a gay man go into the mode? I worked with a gay man before and he would go on and on about how only pretty people should be allowed to work and all the ugly people should be sent on an island. He definitely would have sent me to the island in a heart beat.

    Oh gawd, gay men are their own universe! Yes, I've had them go into "mode". Usually has me rolling in laughter. I was thinking more "lesbian" than "gay". Gay men do it to such an extreme, I can't take it seriously.
  • cassylee
    cassylee Posts: 107 Member
    I think we all talk about the same things.. Just in different ways.

    For example:

    Work Related Grievances
    Me: I can't stand Susie. She's always making passive aggressive comments about my work and I hate the way she says the opposite of what I do at staff meetings.

    Him: *Punches Bob in the face and walks away*

    Housework
    Me: Last night, I washed the dishes, folded and put away laundry, took the dog for a walk, fed, bathed and put the kids to sleep and managed to catch my show. What do you think he did? He dropped his plate in the sink and watched TV for the rest of the night.

    Him: I'm learning, man. I care about her feelings. Last night, I put my plate in the sink for her. She didn't even have to do it for me!

    Kid's Accomplishments
    Me: Little Brenda can count to ten, sing her ABCs and 3 different nursery rhymes!

    Him: I taught Brenda how to pick her nose and wipe it on the dog last night.. I recorded it, wanna see?


    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: - So True - :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    Shocking. I thought men also talked about periods, nail polish, and had pillow fights.

    You mean to tell me men are different from women???

    ixVqgIo.gif
  • Marley2310
    Marley2310 Posts: 304
    "Don't try to understand women , women understand women and they hate each other "
  • Isnt it sad I use to feel bad cause I didnt have alot of girl friends beings that I hung out with men more. Now I know why I rather go to a barber then a salon. Its not fun listening to women cut other women down
  • Joehenny
    Joehenny Posts: 1,222 Member
    "Don't try to understand women , women understand women and they hate each other "

    Funny a woman actually told me that. Lol
  • saschka7
    saschka7 Posts: 577 Member
    I'm a woman but throughout my life my best friends have almost always been guys (except for one woman). Women can be all sorts of dull, boring and nasty creatures, it's true. Not all, but in my opinion...an over-whelming majority are just catty shrews.

    And as far as conversation....guys talk about STUFF: movies, TV, books, music, sports, cars, video games...whatever. In my experience, most women I work with talk CONSTANTLY about their kids, buying a new handbag or shoes, or cooking. :yawn:

    I'd hang out with the guys any day of the week over that. It's not that I don't appreciate kids or shoes or cooking....it's just that I feel there's more to life than talking care of everybody else 24/7 and decorating myself like a cheap (or expensive) *kitten*. I've got a brain and I want to use it by talking about stuff not people.

    I'm really not putting down any of those topics...it's just that when that's ALL that some women talk about, it's kinda....well...shallow and very dull for some of us.
  • nicoleashley_24
    nicoleashley_24 Posts: 144 Member
    I'm a hairstylist and I know there's a lot of "gossip" that *can* go in salons, but I think it all comes down to the person. And I happen to think my mom was right when she told me that the ones with the meanest things to say, are usually the most insecure. If someone gossips to me, I change the subject as quickly as possible. I love to chat with clients about their lives but I'm not going to be condone bad-mouthing in my chair.
  • NikkiSixGuns
    NikkiSixGuns Posts: 630 Member
    So I gotta feel this has an effect on how females view themselves whenever they are assessing themselves.

    Absolutely.
    Kid's Accomplishments
    Me: Little Brenda can count to ten, sing her ABCs and 3 different nursery rhymes!

    Him: I taught Brenda how to pick her nose and wipe it on the dog last night.. I recorded it, wanna see?

    Absofrickinlutely.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    Wait you've never had a gay man go into the mode? I worked with a gay man before and he would go on and on about how only pretty people should be allowed to work and all the ugly people should be sent on an island. He definitely would have sent me to the island in a heart beat.

    Oh gawd, gay men are their own universe! Yes, I've had them go into "mode". Usually has me rolling in laughter. I was thinking more "lesbian" than "gay". Gay men do it to such an extreme, I can't take it seriously.

    LOL thats the truth
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I'm a woman but throughout my life my best friends have almost always been guys (except for one woman). Women can be all sorts of dull, boring and nasty creatures, it's true. Not all, but in my opinion...an over-whelming majority are just catty shrews.

    And as far as conversation....guys talk about STUFF: movies, TV, books, music, sports, cars, video games...whatever. In my experience, most women I work with talk CONSTANTLY about their kids, buying a new handbag or shoes, or cooking. :yawn:

    I'd hang out with the guys any day of the week over that. It's not that I don't appreciate kids or shoes or cooking....it's just that I feel there's more to life than talking care of everybody else 24/7 and decorating myself like a cheap (or expensive) *kitten*. I've got a brain and I want to use it by talking about stuff not people.

    I'm really not putting down any of those topics...it's just that when that's ALL that some women talk about, it's kinda....well...shallow and very dull for some of us.

    You need to find some more interesting females to associate with. Look for childless females who have big feet and enjoy playing WOW or some other rpg. They cant talk about cute shoes because there are none for them, no kids, and if they like games like that chances they are a big nerd and have some interests in life other than the mall..
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
    I recall girls in high school gossiping like that with one another about other girls and/or other girls' cliques.

    In college (I attended an all women's college) I don't recall that type of gossip; however given the economic class differences among study body members,some women were not too subtle about how important that was to them. Women snubbing other women was based upon $ Daddy made or family lineage (New England blue blood). I attended college during the "sisterhood is powerful" era so backstabbing conversations went underground.

    Since I was in an overwhelmingly male dominated profession most of my career I didn't have too many female cohorts and colleagues. I do think though that professionally some women judged their peers harshly, and participated in the same male speculation as to how did SHE get that promotion. But I also sensed that when it came to competition at work, the guys were pretty harsh behind one another's backs too.

    I understand your observation about female subtefuge, cattiness, what ever you want to call it. However, I can't even recall women in my family (my mom talking about her female relatives, or co-workers that way, my sisters, cousins). Maybe I was lucky or just dumb not to be exposed and participate in that kind of self hatred.
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
    I've never encountered this. Granted, I don't visit salons much, but my girlfriends are the coolest people I know. We don't talk about people. Like not even celebrities. We have drinking games while watching Grandma's Boy or Hot Rod or something. We talk about real-world things we're going through, or planning to do, or thinking about. We just have too much *kitten* going on individually to talk about instead of other people.

    I like to believe the most women are this way and what you're seeing is an exception, not the rule.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    I think we all talk about the same things.. Just in different ways.

    For example:

    Work Related Grievances
    Me: I can't stand Susie. She's always making passive aggressive comments about my work and I hate the way she says the opposite of what I do at staff meetings.

    Him: *Punches Bob in the face and walks away*

    Housework
    Me: Last night, I washed the dishes, folded and put away laundry, took the dog for a walk, fed, bathed and put the kids to sleep and managed to catch my show. What do you think he did? He dropped his plate in the sink and watched TV for the rest of the night.

    Him: I'm learning, man. I care about her feelings. Last night, I put my plate in the sink for her. She didn't even have to do it for me!

    Kid's Accomplishments
    Me: Little Brenda can count to ten, sing her ABCs and 3 different nursery rhymes!

    Him: I taught Brenda how to pick her nose and wipe it on the dog last night.. I recorded it, wanna see?

    A-Frickin-MEN! This is so perfect. I don't think women have more troubles than men, or that they are eviler as a whole, I just think they deal with their problems more vocally. When women have grievances, they air them publicly and share their feelings with others. Men just tend to deal with problem outright and forget about it.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    Wait you've never had a gay man go into the mode? I worked with a gay man before and he would go on and on about how only pretty people should be allowed to work and all the ugly people should be sent on an island. He definitely would have sent me to the island in a heart beat.

    Hell, why do the uggos get to kick it on their own private island, while the hot people have to work? Bullsh!t, I say!!
  • chunkydunk714
    chunkydunk714 Posts: 784 Member
    Which is why I dont have many chick friends...and the ones I do have are some bad *kitten* bitc hes......:blushing:
  • amandapye78
    amandapye78 Posts: 820 Member
    I agree with your assessment, I don't like most other women. I worked at a scrap booking company and I hated it!! It was almost all women and the jealousy,cattyness, back stabbing and general hatred of each other made me glad I am not a lesbian.
  • GiddyupTim
    GiddyupTim Posts: 2,819 Member
    I think that the motivating impulse for this putting others down is competition. Men compete in other ways -- sports, etc.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    I've often heard it said that "women could rule the world, if only they could learn to get along".

    I've worked for powerful women, and the level of politics, and how personal they made it, was astounding. They were in a group of three peers, heading three important divisions of the company. Two women, one man, all reporting directly to the company president (also a woman). The women were so completely incapable of working together, and the president got so sick of their bickering, that she ultimately promoted the guy above both of them to give herself a buffer. One of them left shortly thereafter.
  • Lifting_Knitter
    Lifting_Knitter Posts: 1,025
    "Don't try to understand women , women understand women and they hate each other "

    Truth! :laugh:
  • rlmadrid
    rlmadrid Posts: 694 Member
    I'm a woman but throughout my life my best friends have almost always been guys (except for one woman). Women can be all sorts of dull, boring and nasty creatures, it's true. Not all, but in my opinion...an over-whelming majority are just catty shrews.

    And as far as conversation....guys talk about STUFF: movies, TV, books, music, sports, cars, video games...whatever. In my experience, most women I work with talk CONSTANTLY about their kids, buying a new handbag or shoes, or cooking. :yawn:

    I'd hang out with the guys any day of the week over that. It's not that I don't appreciate kids or shoes or cooking....it's just that I feel there's more to life than talking care of everybody else 24/7 and decorating myself like a cheap (or expensive) *kitten*. I've got a brain and I want to use it by talking about stuff not people.

    I'm really not putting down any of those topics...it's just that when that's ALL that some women talk about, it's kinda....well...shallow and very dull for some of us.

    You need to find some more interesting females to associate with. Look for childless females who have big feet and enjoy playing WOW or some other rpg. They cant talk about cute shoes because there are none for them, no kids, and if they like games like that chances they are a big nerd and have some interests in life other than the mall..

    I have big feet! Can we share shoes?? Let's be besties!
    <goes and tells everyone how much your feet smell>

    Ya, I don't get along well with girls. I want to talk about a kick-*kitten* play my team made last night off of one of my punts. I don't really care how much their new dress cost.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I agree with your assessment, I don't like most other women. I worked at a scrap booking company and I hated it!! It was almost all women and the jealousy,cattyness, back stabbing and general hatred of each other made me glad I am not a lesbian.

    nah lesbians and bi women usually have a totally different mind set. Lesbian couples are always more interesting than a hetero catty woman. oh and a lot more fun
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I'm a woman but throughout my life my best friends have almost always been guys (except for one woman). Women can be all sorts of dull, boring and nasty creatures, it's true. Not all, but in my opinion...an over-whelming majority are just catty shrews.

    And as far as conversation....guys talk about STUFF: movies, TV, books, music, sports, cars, video games...whatever. In my experience, most women I work with talk CONSTANTLY about their kids, buying a new handbag or shoes, or cooking. :yawn:

    I'd hang out with the guys any day of the week over that. It's not that I don't appreciate kids or shoes or cooking....it's just that I feel there's more to life than talking care of everybody else 24/7 and decorating myself like a cheap (or expensive) *kitten*. I've got a brain and I want to use it by talking about stuff not people.

    I'm really not putting down any of those topics...it's just that when that's ALL that some women talk about, it's kinda....well...shallow and very dull for some of us.

    You need to find some more interesting females to associate with. Look for childless females who have big feet and enjoy playing WOW or some other rpg. They cant talk about cute shoes because there are none for them, no kids, and if they like games like that chances they are a big nerd and have some interests in life other than the mall..

    I have big feet! Can we share shoes?? Let's be besties!
    <goes and tells everyone how much your feet smell>

    Ya, I don't get along well with girls. I want to talk about a kick-*kitten* play my team made last night off of one of my punts. I don't really care how much their new dress cost.

    you stole my shoes before i could tell you about that nasty fungus I got going on.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I know there's articles out there discussing the psychology of why some women do this. Not all do, but I've observed it as well. I also have a different perspective. I'm a lesbian, and among my gay/lesbian friends, we don't have those kinds of conversations, either. Not to say we can't gossip, though.:laugh:

    Wait you've never had a gay man go into the mode? I worked with a gay man before and he would go on and on about how only pretty people should be allowed to work and all the ugly people should be sent on an island. He definitely would have sent me to the island in a heart beat.

    Hell, why do the uggos get to kick it on their own private island, while the hot people have to work? Bullsh!t, I say!!

    I think his ideal of an island was like gitmo bay private island for us uggos