Why is this ok?
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Body shaming isn't ok. Two wrongs don't make a right. I'm sorry you're being shamed for being small/thin. If your friends are doing this I would say something to them. Tell them that it makes you uncomftable.0
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Just say, "I understand your concern, but commenting on my weight is inappropriate. I assure you I am a healthy weight for my size and level of activity. Thanks again for caring." Then change the subject.0
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sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
That's not even what my question was about. WTF
Quite frankly, I don't care what your question was. I was underweight for a number yrs due to my kidney disease going undiagnosed. If you are an adult you sure don't know how to act like one. I was not being rude at first just stating facts which you obviously didn't like.
My weight is a very big button and people have always said things, like your first comment, in ways were it's snobby and rude.
All I said was for 5'4 you are underweight. That my dear is a fact! Not snobby or rude but, FACT!
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My sister is a little shorter and smaller than you. I don't think she is quite 100 pounds. It is very hard for her to gain weight and she is very into fitness. You didn't mention anything about wanting to be smaller. So I don't see any cause for alarm. It might be a little embarrassing, but since it is a normal body function I am going to talk about it anyway. As long as you are having a steady menstruation you have nothing to worry about. If you don't you might lack a healthy amount of body fat and you should see your doctor.
Mental health is just as important physical health, I wish you a bright future.0 -
^The period thing is actually a very good measure of a healthy weight for a smaller woman. Your hormones get confused if you are truly in trouble.0
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Also, to answer your question, it's not okay. It's very rude. I've also gotten comment like this when I was a tad younger (before the curves grew in), and I'd just look them straight in the eye and say, "But I don't want to be bigger.". Not in a rude way, just a statement. I didn't want to be bigger, or smaller. I was happy, and perplexed at why someone thought I should change. That normally ended the conversation.0
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sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »lishie_rebooted wrote: »
Calling bluff on being an adultsk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
That's not even what my question was about. WTF
I'm actually 19 for your information
The older you get usually the less you care about what other people think.
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Body shaming is never ok.0
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Technically, you told her she's unhealthy:ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
That's not even what my question was about. WTF
Quite frankly, I don't care what your question was. I was underweight for a number yrs due to my kidney disease going undiagnosed. If you are an adult you sure don't know how to act like one. I was not being rude at first just stating facts which you obviously didn't like.
My weight is a very big button and people have always said things, like your first comment, in ways were it's snobby and rude.
All I said was for 5'4 you are underweight. That my dear is a fact! Not snobby or rude but, FACT!ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
Yes, she overreacted a bit, but telling her flat-out she's not healthy wasn't called for. I'm assuming you based your statement on BMI tables, yes? They're not absolute, meaning that 108 isn't a hard-and-fast health cutoff point for someone at 5'4" ("at 108 you're healthy and at 107 you're not" is obviously ridiculous). They're meant to gauge populations and aren't necessarily meaningful when applied to individuals.
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It's not OK. I have a daughter who lost weight and got to be 101lbs, no muscle, 5'4" like you. She was struggling with stomach issues and stress, which caused the weight loss. She was really upset every time she lost weight because her whole life she was called "Skinny". But when she started she had comments from a dance teacher, oh your measurements went down, she came home and cried. Because most people want to lose, they think its OK to tell teens this.
When she was really little, like 10, even had parents comment on her being skinny to her. One of her friends actually asked her how to lose weight. she was 12 the friend was 14.
Other people were like she can eat anything, no she can't she has stomach problems and gets sick if she doesn't eat healthy. Fatty foods really make her sick. So why is that OK. Don't you think everyone should eat healthy.
It was a real struggle for me being overweight to balance the fact that I needed to watch what I ate and not focus on pounds or weight. My daughter is 21 now and gained 20lbs back, which makes her look healthier. I didn't care about the skinny, but she was pale and looked sickly (which she kinda was). Yes she takes Zumba classes with me, to be healthy, not skinny. Yes she eats salad, its her favorite food, again to be healthy.
FYI, the first time was the comment from a Doctor, does she eat? I was like yes she just ate an entire McDonald's Cheeseburger on the way here. Its just that she gets excited when I buy her fruit and veggies, doesn't eat cake or cookies. So yes she does, but she slowed down on weight gain because she is very healthy.
It isn't just body shaming the things they are saying to you, it is a true fault in our society that people think its OK to be thin and eat junk, you will be fine. Trust me my daughter and husband are both thin because of genes and really they eat smaller portions than I do. My husband eats lots of junk and has high cholesterol, I eat healthy and have perfect cholesterol. He is finally at the perfect weight for his height (underweight most of his life) and I am still 40lbs overweight. So weight and size should not be the only things we judge people on. Its not right no matter what size you are. And if I were there when they said it to you I would tell them how wrong they are for passing judgement!!!!
We are who we are and if we are active and eat healthy overall, no one has right to talk about our size!!!!
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^Yes, BMIs are bunk on an individual scale. I'm 5'9" and 125lbs, but I'm not even close to being underweight for my bodytype. So long as your doctor and your mirror are happy, you're just fine.0
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Technically, you told her she's unhealthy:ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
That's not even what my question was about. WTF
Quite frankly, I don't care what your question was. I was underweight for a number yrs due to my kidney disease going undiagnosed. If you are an adult you sure don't know how to act like one. I was not being rude at first just stating facts which you obviously didn't like.
My weight is a very big button and people have always said things, like your first comment, in ways were it's snobby and rude.
All I said was for 5'4 you are underweight. That my dear is a fact! Not snobby or rude but, FACT!ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
Yes, she overreacted a bit, but telling her flat-out she's not healthy wasn't called for. I'm assuming you based your statement on BMI tables, yes? They're not absolute, meaning that 108 isn't a hard-and-fast health cutoff point for someone at 5'4" ("at 108 you're healthy and at 107 you're not" is obviously ridiculous). They're meant to gauge populations and aren't necessarily meaningful when applied to individuals.
To be fair I have paralyzed calf muscles which basically means they never ever get bigger. When I was 98 lbs I was unhealthy. And I am also 5'4. I know bmi doesn't work for everyone but, it is normally the other way around. Ppl with excessive muscles are considered overweight when they obviously aren't. Very very very rarely does it work the other way. I tokd her it was her problem(business) not anyone else's. I was agreeing with her and she got an attitude. I can't help that she has no reading comprehension.
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Technically, you told her she's unhealthy:ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »sk1nnyf0rm3 wrote: »ForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
That's not even what my question was about. WTF
Quite frankly, I don't care what your question was. I was underweight for a number yrs due to my kidney disease going undiagnosed. If you are an adult you sure don't know how to act like one. I was not being rude at first just stating facts which you obviously didn't like.
My weight is a very big button and people have always said things, like your first comment, in ways were it's snobby and rude.
All I said was for 5'4 you are underweight. That my dear is a fact! Not snobby or rude but, FACT!
THIS! I know I'm underweight. I GET TOLD IT ALL THE TIME. That was the whole point of this thread. Thank you for (finally) being someone who understandsForeverSunshine09 wrote: »Well the smallest you should be at 5'4 is 108 to be healthy. So you aren't healthy but, that is no one's problem but, yours.
Yes, she overreacted a bit, but telling her flat-out she's not healthy wasn't called for. I'm assuming you based your statement on BMI tables, yes? They're not absolute, meaning that 108 isn't a hard-and-fast health cutoff point for someone at 5'4" ("at 108 you're healthy and at 107 you're not" is obviously ridiculous). They're meant to gauge populations and aren't necessarily meaningful when applied to individuals.
As I mentioned earlier, also, weight is a BIG button for me because many people say it in snobby/rude ways0
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