Sometimes family can really make u feel like crap

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  • AliciaStinger
    AliciaStinger Posts: 402 Member
    Basically ditto to everything I read so far. My parents got married in their back yard under their orange tree on July 4th. They had a large crowd and a rabbi do the ceremony (even though my mom isn't particularly religious, and was raised with Christian traditions as well as Jewish ones), but still, it wasn't your traditional expensive rent-a-hall, religion-based wedding. (Not that there's anything wrong with those, either! As others said, what kind of wedding is for the bride and groom to decide, and nobody else.) My mom's dress was like $30 or something. If I ever get married, it'll be a small, family-and-close-friends-only event. I don't care if the guests dress up. I don't even really care if there they're. I don't care if there's a theme, I don't care if it's done in a backyard, a park, a courthouse, or on a boat. All I care about is whether the dude I marry and I are both happy and want to be there. It's financially practical, and it's more my style.

    So anyway, I know what they said hurts - but a wedding is about coming together with the person you want to spend your life with. You may be stuck with your family, but you're choosing to be with this man - and if they don't want to be happy for you, be with you on your special day, or respect your wishes...as much as it hurts, you just have to ignore them and do what's best for you. As long as you and the groom don't have any regrets, it's all good! :-) Good luck.
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
    I suggest you and your guy decide the particulars of your big day, civil ceremony or not, jug band, beach, Church, etc. Then you matter of factly tell your family what you decided and that it would please you if they attended. (if it would). Regardless of their response, do what you want to do, and enjoy your day. Dont let anyone take that away from you. Don't let anyone hijack your happiness.

    As another poster mentioned, the wedding industry is a multi billion dollar business(including the diamond market --way overpriced) Personally, I would set aside whatever funds you were planning to spend on a wedding, give yourselves a catered party when you set up wherever you will be living and have a great time; and either invest the funds or travel. Hire a professional photographer for formal or casual pics of the two of you, maybe of your first days together wherever you are living.

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