WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JULY2015
Options
Replies
-
Had breakfast. The scrambled eggs were over cooked and so were DH'S poached eggs. Awful 70s kitch music. :sad: Otherwise the place is great. Quiet room and an excellent arrangement for going to the bathroom in the night with a small glowing spot on the mirror so you can just about see. Great idea!
So, off to Salisbury cathedral!
Heather UK0 -
Joyce in Indiana. I am a Master Gardener and also took landscaping design classes. How much maintenance are you thinking you want to do? There is no such thing as a maintenance free landscape. Some ideas for your front are bo><wood shrubs- they are slow growing and handle pruning to limit their height well. You often see these in fancy herb garden or mosaic gardens for that reason- they use them to outline the design. Spruce are very slow growing and come in dwarf forms. If you want more color spirea varieties are good since they need to be cut down to about 6 inches in the late winter/ early spring. Often builder's landscapes aren't the best thing to go by since they use the cheapest material and don't worry about the long term so often what they plant quickly takes over. You could also put in a perennial bed along the front. If it is heavily mulched with NO landscape fabric it won't require much care and would add some color. You could "ground" the perennial bed with taller shrubs at the corners of the house, maybe a small slow growing one on either side of the walk. My yard is almost entirely flower/ shrub beds with just walkways of grass and they really require less work overall than weekly mowing. Feel free to message me if you want more suggestions or have questions.0
-
Joyce~ DSIL has infected salivary glands and stones (big ones in there)so she will be sprung from the hospital tomorrow and then go back to the lake and get her car, then come down home here to Portland, then onto Yale-New Haven which is one of the best hospitals in the country..
off to see DFIL and then home to work on the house0 -
simquilts2 wrote: »Oh, I also just found your thread and really like the monthly goals and the support of those who are posting. I am new to the boards, not real sure how this works, but hope to join in and be a part of this.
Welcome.....keep coming back and reading and join in the conversation....bookmark this thread by clicking on the star at the top of the page (it will turn yellow), then when you come to the "Community" tab, click on the gray star next to the bell and you'll find the link to this thread and it will take you back to where you left off reading.
This has been a one day at a time adventure for me. I have created a morning routine that connects me with the important goals of my day so I am anchored and ready to proceed. I have developed other routines that save me from the wasted energy of indecision.
Barbie from beautiful NW Washington
0 -
Miriam, I have 2 son with mental health issues, so we have something in common.
Mary in MN-have fun in Vegas. You know what they say, "whatever happens in Vegas...." lol We'll try to get together when you get back. I don't know anyone at all in MN, so some friends would be nice.
I logged all of my food yesterday and drank all of my water. No real exercise to speak of, but I am down 1 lb today. I'll take it!
My story-We have 2 bio kids. Then we adopted 2 more-they were 2 & 3 yr old boys who were victims of severe neglect and trauma as infants/toddlers and also had prenatal exposure to drugs & alcohol. We were told that when they came to live in our home, they'd be just fine. Well, they weren't.
The older of the two-Chip has bipolar disorder and he was having 3 hour rages monthly. We got him stable at age 8 and he did fine until he turned 18 and went off his meds. He's been manic since.
Our youngest boy is Daniel. When he turned 10 yrs old, his brain disorders manifested in violence and aggression and he was hospitalized 11 times in 2 years for danger to self and others. It was very scary! After the last one, child welfare (DCFS) told us that if we picked him up from the psych hospital they'd charge us with "child endangerment" for failure to protect our other kids. If we left him there, they'd charge us with "neglect." It was a Catch 22. Five therapists recommended residential care, but there seemed to be no way to fund the cost of $150,000 per year. Insurance doesn't cover it.
After many long meetings with multiple state agencies, we still had no solutions. We decided to err on the side of safety for our other kids and "staged an abandonment" at the hospital, allowing DCFS to take custody. We were charged with and indicated for neglect. We fought in juvenile court to get the neglect finding amended to "no-fault dependency" and fought in administrative law court to get our names expunged from the child abuser list. But we were still stuck with this case in juvenile court for 3 1/2 years. It was miserable-they were doing home safety inspections monthly, and over 50 meetings a year over threats of terminating our parental rights. All because we had a mentally sick child-who was sick when they gave him to us. It seemed so unjust, so ethically and morally wrong, but the state people kept telling us-"this is how we do it-get over it!" But I just couldn't. I loved my son and I wanted him back.
So, I started researching how things work in other states and found that Medicaid was the general funder for theses cases. Most kids with domestic adoptions get Medicaid as part the the adoption and mine did. I was repeatedly told that his care was not covered under IL. So, I studied the law and from what I learned-his treatment WAS covered all along. I took the law to the Medicaid agency and challenged it, asking them to show me WHERE in the law it was NOT covered-they gave me the politically correct version of "yeah, we know, sucks to be you."
So, we had no choice but to challenge it legally and sued 2 state agencies in a landmark federal case for the state violating federal Medicaid law. They settled up fast! We got our son back. I wrote about the ordeal in my book, "Second Time Foster Child" and my book and my name is well known throughout the state.
9 more families filed similar suits. Theirs became a class action suit still pending.
Last year, I helped draft and pass the Custody Relinquishment Prevention Act (Public Act 98-0808) to stop the state from doing this. I have won a number of awards for mental health advocacy. My congressional award is called "Angels in Adoption."
Yes, it's quite a story. I can't believe it's my life. So, the next book is fiction. I want to start a series of stories about women raising children of trauma based upon truth (which is stranger than fiction) with healthy doses of romance and humor. We call ourselves the "trauma mamas" so I have trademarks on that term and will base the series on it.
Enough about me, I am thankful to have a private accountability place. I am more in the public eye than I ever wanted to be.
Oh-and because I know you will ask-Daniel is now 20 years old. He lived in 3 different residential placements over 5 years. Spent some time in juvi and then adult jail at 17. Then we had him moved to an adult transitional living program where he is actually doing well. Aggression free for 3 years now. Has a nice GF and they are expecting a baby. He works part time at an animal shelter and lives on his own. He still has a team of staff working with him which helps a lot. Some said he was a "throw away kid" that he'd never be better. We are glad we stuck it through with him.
Toni in MN0 -
Wow Toni, we do have a lot in common but my kids were my biological kids. Only one of three boys had severe problems. He had been born with club feet and the corrections made him a miserable baby. So my former husband singled him out for the majority of his abuse, although the other two got some. So he developed PTSD, rage attacks, as well as the family bipolar disorder. And ended up dealing with DHS and the courts to try to get him help. In Iowa at the time, to get a kid declared a child in need of assistance so that the state would pay for residential care, I had to ask his therapist to accuse me of abuse, which was unfounded but that was what was needed to get him in to the "system". Once he was a child in need of assistance (china kid) I did not have custody of him! So the stupid DHS social worker was making all the decisions about where he went. And she was totally clueless about his illnesses. She thought he was oppositional (common with Bipolar) because I was too controlling, which made everyone who knows me laugh! I had three rules- cannot harm your brothers, cannot harm the animals, if you tear up things, do it in your room (he punched holes in the walls). Anyway, this stupid DHS worker tried to send him back to his dad who had caused his PTSD by his abuse of the child! We finally got him in to residential treatment, then independent living where he tried to fit in with the other (criminal) kids and ended up committing crimes with them so he ended up in the juvie system. Then back to independent living when he turned 18. He did learn to control his rages, but partly by just isolating himself. He had a social phobia in the first place, so this just made it horrible for him. And yes, he refuses meds. Oh, and he has OCD too. And ADHD. (I have both bipolar disorder and ADHD as well). And all this was going on when I was the "consumer" advocate for the company that managed Iowa's Medicaid mental health benefits! Needless to say, after I talked about this all over the state, being very high profile in the mental health system, parents no longer lose custody of their child when their child is declared a china kid.
What many people don't realize going in to adoptions is that the parents most likely to end up losing or giving up custody of their kids are the people that do impulsive things and get in to trouble. So there is more than likely going to be a family history of genetic illnesses like ADHD, bipolar disorder, or antisocial personality disorder as well as a propensity to addiction! So you are more than likely going to run in to some sort of problem sooner or later. That said, I am in the process of adopting my two great nieces (my sister's grand-daughters) whose father has the family bipolar disorder, is a severe alcoholic and a severe sociopath (no conscience) and has also used meth and other street drugs. The mom is a meth addict and who knows what else. So I may end up having troubles with these girls too. Girls are more likely to not be aggressive and to be willing to take medication so hopefully I can handle it.
Oh, and I have a masters in Rehabilitation Counseling! Got a bachelors from the U of Chicago in anthropology and behavioral sciences. So I am no dummy about managing behaviors! And still had all this trouble!0 -
dreamwriter wrote: »Back from holidays. I am apparently not very good at balancing my life. I didn't do any kind of a job of keeping track of my food and I certainly didn't post on here. Just starting reading a few pages back so know that I am way behind on news.
I went camping/fishing with DH at beginning of vacation. The fishing was the pits but the bird watching was great. Geese, ducks, loons, bald eagles, osprey, swan and one big old pelican. Saw Mama Bear and her twins. Heard there was a cougar in the area but never spotted it which was okay with me. Nice sunny days out on the boat. DD brought DGC and their friends up for one day. We fished, roasted wieners, played at the playground and played baseball. A perfect day.
Unpacked the trailer, washed clothes , packed and gone the next morning. We drove to Keremeous on that day. It was a quaint little stop. Ate at a Thai restaurant but DH was left hungering so we went to a different restaurant where he could get a drink and fries. Lol We explored the back roads enjoying vicariously how the other half lives on their acreages. Some beautiful but massive houses.
We were greeted enthusiastically in Richmond. It always feels a little odd when the first night we are there my DDIL invites her friends for supper with us. Don't get me wrong they are nice people but the first night we just want to catch up with DS, DDIL and the DGSs. C'est la vie.
We went to Hicks lake and had an enjoyable day. First trip ever that I forgot my swim suit. I did wade in the water. It was nice that our DGD , her girlfriend and our DGGS were able to join us. Nice day except for the drive. Next day we went to an adventure playground, appointment with accountant and a ride on the Sea Wall around Stanley park. I rented a trike but that museum piece weighed a ton and was hard to control, nothing at all like my Sparkle Orange. I did make the ride though.
DGS came back with us. We stopped in Okanogan to see some friends and family. I was so proud of the way he introduced himself and put up with all our visiting. We are home now and he is anxious to be with his cousin. Plans call for long boarding, cycling, swimming , jamming together and movie watching. Long talks into the evening. I think Gramps wants to take them camping and fishing also.
Toodle Ooh for now.
- Sharon in Lethbridge (hoping to get back on track)
Sharon - I missed you!! Sounds like you had a great vacation. Camping is always fun, so relaxing, even if you spend all that time getting it organized and then cleaning it up when you get home. We have relatives in Keremeous. Where they live it is such peaceful place, away from the traffic and just close enough to little orchards.
Lillian in West Central Saskatchewan0 -
Miriam and Toni ~ Kudos to both of you for the hard work you have done in order to get your children the care they need.
Sharon ~ Sounds like you had a lovely holiday with many fun outdoor activities.
I find that I dislike long drives the older I get. Even going to the beach (Daytona hopefully) seems so far away (a 7/8 hour drive).
Joyce ~ Your house will look so much better when you remove the shrubs out front. We built our first house in 1975 and now rent it out. We had all the overgrown shrubs removed in the front a few years ago and it gave it a fresh look. Low growing shrubs across the porch would be a good way to go. Do low growing azaleas do well in your area? They would look very pretty in the spring and stay green all year long.
Lenora ~ We never get calls from the NRA. My DH loves his guns and would totally support them.
Carol - GA0 -
fanncy0626 wrote: »Hello everyone! I mowed my lawn for the first time today it was over 23,000 steps and a lot of woman handling in the very neglected yard. I also did my strong lift 5x5 routine. So I logged over 1,100 calories. Our old house has been reroofed and should be reinspected tomorrow. If all goes well we may close on both houses next week. Hopefully before Friday. Friday we will be flying to LasVegas on a trip that my DH won through his hard work at selling this was a nation wide company promotion so he did really well. We don't gamble so am going for sun and fun.
Have a great day everyone!
Mary from Minnesota
hold on to the handrails when you are trotting down those steps!!0 -
looks like a purdy house behind the bushes.
hey peeps -
gonna go workout for 1/2hr or so then taking the kids to the ocean to our "SUMMER CABIN" for the day... couldn't sleep at all in the beginning of the night, had foot cramps that wouldn't go away!! if you've never had them, you don't want them. later peeps0 -
Sharon sounds like a great vacation.
Joyce I agree the although the bushes are neatly groomed, they are too big for your home. They also present a security problem in that provide too much cover if someone decided to rob your home. I agree with Miriam to be careful with a landscape company, they sometimes are only interested in the short term and want to put in as many plants as they can because it means more money for them. One possibility is to look in your own neighborhood and find homes you like their landscaping. Find out what those plants are and how they went about it. Also find out how much maintenance the plantings create.
For us most of our bushes only need to be pruned once a year before the fourth of July. Then there is the diva hedge we inherited from the previous owner. It is over 50 feet long and needs to be pruned about every three weeks long, treated for Japanese Beetle, protected from rabbits in the winter, cleaned out at the base once to twice a year. The reasons we put up with it: One is it would be such a massive job to take it out. Two it provides us with wonderful natural privacy from a neighbor who has only mowed their yard twice this summer. (Love them anyway)
Miriam the garden tour I just went on was the Master Gardeners of Dakota County. It was so much fun to share my passion with them. Continued prayers for your son.
Beth continued prayers for your son.
Toni just read your story after I e-mailed you. Your strength amazes me. Yes I have seen too many children as an educator struggling with the challenges you described. I would love to get together with you. Finding solutions that are effective that bring these children to wellness will take the whole village. All of us will benefit from your work. Thank you. You are on the right site. Yes this is a site about setting goals for weight loss. I am also finding it a site that advocates total health. Mind body spirit emotional . Because for me at least to really maintain weight loss/health all of these need nurturing.
Miriam I have learned the hard way the only behavior I can really manage is my own and sometimes for me it take Herculean effort.
Whew after all this time for me to go garden. MNMargaret 0 -
Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .
Good Morning Ladies,
Michele NC, just enjoy that Hot Flash and remember why you are thankful that you rarely have them anymore.
Remember, we get opportunities all the time and just have to realize them. It’s funny, I have been through that stuff for years and still occasionally have a flash. Ya just never know?
Lenora, I did actually consider taking a few things to see about being altered, but in looking at them, realize they would practically have to be remade, so just don’t think it is worth it. Just a few years ago, you could get things altered at a reasonable price, but those people have become real proud of their skills.
Becca, what do you mean in Oregon you cannot pump your own gas? Does the attendant do it for you? Strange that my DD didn’t mention that to me after she moved there last year. And where were you when you did pump your own recently? I do like the shoes, but vote for checking out Pay Less before spending that kind of money on them. I just hate to spend that on something I would wear only on occasion.
Pip and Barbie, ya’ll just keep up that great exercise. Maybe if I read about it often enough some of the good results will rub off on me? Ya think? Huh? Maybe? Hopefully!
Sylvia, I know how you feel about eating chili after the last two times. Even though you know it had nothing to do with the problems, it’s a very mental thing. Been there done that.
Mary, so glad the roof is done and keeping my fingers crossed for the closings. You enjoy that sun and fun in LV. You deserve it along with DH.
Dimmom, welcome. Please tell us about yourself so we can get to know you. Also please end each post with a name that you want us to call you as well as a location. If you can log your food, you can use this site. When I started, I thought I’d starve to death on just 1200 calories a day, so I began by looking up the calories in lots of foods that I like. From there, I got a list of can eat and never eat foods that I used as a base. Planning ahead is a big help to stay in your calorie allotment. Exercise of any kind helps. Oh and staying away from ice cream, alone or in a crowd, is a good idea.
Come often and post when you want. We are here for support.
Sue, do pop in to say Hi once in a while and let us know how you are doing. No one will fuss at you for not getting any exercise, that’s for sure.
Katla, sorry for the sore back. I hope Santa is happy in his new spot. Feel better soon.
Joyce, I laughed about you saying “it’s a bad thing for me to know” about the brownie bites at Walmart. Ain’t that the truth?? Some really yummy things are just better for us if we don’t even know about them. Wow Wee, those bushes have become overgrown. It will look like a different house when they are gone and something new and small is in their place. Please remember to show us a picture of that.
Simquilts, welcome. Please tell us about yourself and sign each post with a name you want to be called. It is also helpful to put a location, general or specific. Come often, this thing works and this group of ladies is great for support and information.
Sharon, your vacation sounds great and certainly not dull. Glad you are home safely so not we can see more of you.
Heather, being the great cook that you are, I’m sure you will occasionally have a bad meal out. I like the light idea in your room.
Allison, what is the prognosis for your DSIL? That sounds pretty serious.
Toni, thanks for sharing your story with us. I’d say Daniel is one lucky kid to have found you and have you fight for him. It is so frustrating that you had to go through all that crap!
to any Newbies that I missed. Come often and join in the chat. This thing works!! Please sign your post with what you want to be called. It makes it easier for us to respond to you. Also a location is great, be it specific or general. We are happy to have you join us.
At my last Doctor’s appointment, he did an x-ray of my shoulder which has been getting worse and worse lately. I thought it was arthritis but he said there was just a little there. It is bad enough that it is keeping me from sleeping well lately. I’m doing specific exercises for it and if it doesn’t improve soon will probably break down and get a shot in it. Going to be a beautiful day here, with lower humidity for a day, so will try to get out and enjoy it.
I hope you all have a happy and healthy day.
Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC
0 -
AKC dog show in town today so we're going to spend part of the day wandering around and looking at dogs. 0 -
Wow what a week- three days gone from home but I stayed on track- no food temptation to snack on and i had a burner to cook just what I would eat. My weigh loss was good for the week.
I too have a son with MH issues. He is socially behind. Tried to go to work for the first time and had a panic attack. So Psych eval and now in counseling which the counselor wants us to go too. So still learning how to parent when my "baby" is 24. He is also working with Voc Rehab. He has Psoriatic Arthritis too.0 -
The manager was fired yesterday, thank the good Lord for small favors.
And, speaking of getting exactly what's necessary, I was also allowed to promote the hostess to crew chief, which I did yesterday. Moves from part-time to full-time and from $11 to $15 an hour and I need her there... Tomorrow is the big cleaning day, shutting down at 4 p.m. until 11 a.m. the next day. Will be tearing apart the kitchen, degreasing and power washing all of it, and putting it all back together, as well as the rest of the restaurant.
Back to my family--daughter, grandbabies - 4 mo girl and 4 year old boy-- and my son-in-law are here for a week, as well, and the daughter and SIL will come in and assist. Taking today off, and taking a nap. Later, guys.0 -
-
Well added another 5 min to working out, so up to 40 min. Loss another lb so 5 lbs under my original goal weight. On the road heading for the ocean and a campfire.
Welcome to all the new peeps
Congrats to all who loss some weight
Bummer to all who gained weight, keep at it, don't give up we r here for u!!
Hugs and best wishes to everyone else0 -
Gayle, my son has trouble reading faces (partly due to poor eyesight) and that makes it really hard, so he is also socially behind. He is 31 and sometimes acts like he is 16 still. I knew some of the psych docs in Boise very well, twenty years ago, since I worked on the psych unit at St. Al's. I was doing "peer support" decades before it became well known. I hope your therapist is one of the good ones! Skill teaching, not hand holding!0
-
Joyce: I'm with you! Heather can have my share of Indian food, too. Spicy foods don't agree with me. I agree with your advice to Pip regarding the MS ride. I don't have MS but DH does. Pip can ride in the event twice next year. I had a chocolate lava cake for my birthday this year. It was the very first time I've tasted it, and I'll be happy to make that a tradition! Yum! Your azalea will likey grow to a better shape after it has the space it needs, but it will take a little time. :flowerforyou:
slmquilts: Welcome! You join by posting. You can find us again if you click on the star at the top of our page.
miriamwithcats: I graduated from a Master Gardener course, too, in the mid 1970's. It has served me well all these years. I was more focused on growing food than landscape design at the time, but my interests have broadened and the skills I learned have been invaluable. Your suggestions for Joyce are excellent ideas. Kudos for your skill, courage and persistence with the courts & child welfare system. That takes intelligence, determination, and grit. :flowerforyou:
Toni in MN: Wow! Your courage and persistence are inspirational. I think your Trauma Mama series will find an enthusiastic readership. :flowerforyou:
Pip: My mama suffered from foot cramps at night most of her life. I was having issues as I entered menopause but I've rarely had them since I started taking calcium and vitamin D. :flowerforyou:
Barbie: Enjoy the dog show! We missed the Portland dog show this year. I particularly enjoy the agility events. :bigsmile:
Lestan: You will be missed and I hope you decide to come back soon.
We have a cloudy and misty morning here with mild temperatures. We surely need a bit of rain. Photos and messages from DS and DDIL indicate they're having a great time sailing in the San Juan and Gulf Islands. They're headed to Canada today and I wonder where they'll be going through customs. We have liked Bedwell Harbor as a port of entry, and have also gone into Victoria as a port of entry. We have stayed aboard the boat eating apples more than once before going through customs at Bedwell. :bigsmile: I am enjoying their trip vicariously. The places they're going have happy memories for me.
Katla in Beautiful NW Oregon
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” Thomas A. Edison
July Goals:
1. Log every bite and swallow.
2. Cardio exercise at least 3 days a week. Work on flexibility and back strength.
3. Have fun every day.
4. Drink at least three glasses of water daily, preferably more!
5. Eliminate alcohol.
6. Monitor sleep. Try to average 7 or more hours of sleep nightly.
0 -
@Peachstategal - I'm not saying we don't love our guns; I'm just tired of the constant barrage of calls we get from NRA - when we already support them. We get at least 12 - 15 calls a day from them, showing different versions of their name on different number. Of the 12 #s I can block - they take up 3/4th of them; when I hit 12 I have to take some off; then the calls on increase. To me, this is harassment and nothing can or will be done about it. Actually, there is really no way to know if it is NRA calling or someone else - big brother. We chose not to answer them. Just wish they'd take the hint.0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392K Introduce Yourself
- 43.6K Getting Started
- 259.8K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.7K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 402 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.8K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.4K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 998 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.4K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions