Not feeling attractive anymore

jacobs18201

Oh hello to no response lol

yopeeps025

I am in for later read. Because as life goes on people do get to points like this. I have been the same. My first profile pic I though people were crazy. I did't see what everyone else saw.

acorsaut89

FitnessTim wrote: »

Being and feeling attractive is a state of mind. Your weight doesn't define you.

A 200 pound woman who is strong and committed to improving herself for herself can feel sexier than a 90 woman who starves herself to maintain an image she thinks others want.

My wife is currently overweight and was even heavier before. In regards to sex, it has never been a problem for me. I do want her to lose weight for health reasons but I can't imagine our sex life being any better than it is now.

If your husband claims he has no issue with your weight it is because he has no issue with your weight and finds you sexy and attractive no matter what.

That's all besides the point. Controlling your weight is something you need to do for yourself not for someone else.

Approach your sex life like you would a workout. Give it everything you got, don't hold back and don't doubt that you'll achieve whatever you want.

I totally agree with this! When I have clothes on, I'm super confident and show it - I've got a great job, I'm good at my job, I wear nice clothes, I spend time getting ready, I know my stuff - I am confident in who I am. When we're in the bedroom, I'm always super self conscious. However, I've had partners who look at me and tell me that while physically they think I'm hot it's not just my body that made them come after me, it's the way I hold myself and the confidence I project that makes me hot - sure I don't look like the girls on tv or whatever, but I'm real - and I'm really confident in who I am as a person. Bonus, for a lot of guys, is I work hard to get better and they know I'm sweating it out 5 days a week at the gym. The fact that I'm driven and I want more for myself and my life is so much more important than someone who doesn't eat to be a size 0. I eat, I'm real, and I was huge . . .but I have the motivation to get healthy - our partners, if they suggest we lose weight, are coming from a good place: they want us to be healthy so we will be around for a long time; they don't want to see us go through huge amounts of health problems or really struggle. I am 250lbs . . . no where near what I should be and I have a lot left to lose . . .but I'm coming from 340lbs. I look way better than I used to and I feel better . . . men aren't going to look at you and be like oh, look at those rolls EEEK!, or man she's got a little extra flab on her tummy . . . just gonna watch some more tv. No most men are probably gonna be like hey, my wife is naked and I'm going to join her lol. I'm quite sure your husband is being honest when he says he finds you attractive no matter what because he probably genuinely does - he knows who you are as a person and that's what he fell in love with.

Good luck! And feel free to add me . . . I'm always here to chat or vent or whatever you need It's a hard but rewarding journey.

lilbitoftrouble

Hey Jen I think most of us can relate to how you feel. I know I still feel quite unattractive and I am 5 lbs away from my goal. I would love to be friends and I will do my best to help you with plenty of encouragement. Please anyone feel free to add me.

pasandoval

You've already become more attractive by wanting to get fit, changing your state of mind, etc. Ultimately you will look in the mirror, see someone physically attractive, and radiate attractiveness to others because of your confidence but also because you give a damn about your health. It's that last part---the health part--that will give you confidence that you and others will notice. Have fun on your healthy journey--it's a never-ending one, really.

farfromthetree

well, I can relate...or used to. No matter how many times I hear" the scale doesn't matter", for me it does. I feel wayyyyy more attractive after losing 45 lbs. I am much healthier and happier. I exercise regularly, and watch my calories. This in itself has a huge effect on my happiness, and I do not plan on stopping. Surround yourself on MFP and in life with optimistic people who motivate you. Feel free to friend request me if you like. I log daily.

CherylanneCorsini

You've taken a HUGE step just by posting this, saying out loud that you want change. The hardest part is always "getting started" and it sounds like you want to be thinner and you know you can do it!!! Walking has helped me greatly, it's easy, anyone can do it and I have consistently lost every time summer I do it. I use the Pacer App to track my steps. Seeing your progress in black and white is very motivating.
Good Luck, you will do great! Add me if you want to.

Neededchange

I can relate but have made it a point not to take my lack of confidence in my appearance out on my hubby! he tells me he is attracted to me and shows it. I am working on loosing baby weight and managing my diabetes so he is very understanding and supportive. Sometimes a bit more grabby then when I was 130 lbs :-) Just do your best to ensure you aren't pushing your hubby away because intimacy with him may boost your confidence and it burns calories LOL

jacobs18201

Oh no. I never push him away, but the lights are always off Lol & it makes me uncomfortable to feel him knead my rolls Lol.. the fat is just so disgusting feeling to me..

langelieremma10

I completely hear you