Embarrassing injuries.

michellechawner

I broke my arm when I was 5 - falling on a pillow. Try having your mom explain that to the ER nurse who happens to be my aunt... and my aunt was laughing. To this day, I still get asked "so how did you break your arm since you fell on a pillow?" (Note - i landed with all my weight on top of my arm...)

When I was a teen I broke 3 toes running into a dining room chair. They were purple and blue for DAYS.

Then in college when studying for pre-nursing school finals (I ended up changing my major anyways) I cracked a bone in my foot while going down the stairs... I twisted it funny and the side of my foot was blue and yellow for about a week. I couldn't wear my boots to work, so they put me on dispatch for about 3 weeks because I couldn't be in the field without shoes (I was an EMT). The minute I tried to put shoes on I would SCREAM in pain.

And this was NOT me, but a kid I went to high school with was playing with his friends and they lived next door to each other and were hopping fences goofing off when he jumped over the fence and landed in a bush awkwardly and he tore his *kitten*. It needed like 3 stitches if I remember. I figured after that he's never jump a fence again without seeing what was on the other side...

aerochic42

this past Saturday, I got headbutted by a friends dog. As i was bending down to pet the dog, my sunglasses slipt off of the top of my head onto my face, and the dog decided to still be bouncy into my face. I have a nice gash on the birdge of my nose healing currrently. Numerous ankle and knee injuries doing to rolling ankles, slipping and falling on ice etc. sprained wrist the first time I went roller skating. Went to get out my mom's van, slipped somehow and cut my ear on the door latch. Most of my injuries are because I'm a clutz and don't have a good story.

parys1

When I was substantially larger, I slipped off my shoe (1 inch heel) and broke my foot.

My husband was fixing his parents' roof, crouched down and impaled his high upper thigh on a lightning rod (lucky miss).

kganc001

Was at the gym...did an epic workout...weights, cardio the whole shebang. Left the gym, stepped off a curb wrong...tore a ligament in my ankle. Womp.

mustang289

I was having a little bit of rough sex and my (now ex) boyfriend ripped me a little.... level 1, 2 stitches and butt pillow.... yowch

the most embarrassing part was telling the er doc why....

Wondering how many FR you will receive asking if he's seeing anyone yet...

Joreanasaurous

I was dancing around and singing in the shower on and slipping and hit head.... I knocked myself out.

fShaw86

Tried shaving the hair off my toes the other day in the shower, and the razor slipped. I somehow managed to slice off a bit of my pinky toe. Worked out in sandals and a band-aid that day.

sleepingtodream

A few years back my husband and I went on a camping/canoe trip. The first night a the site my friend and I stayed up drinking longer than the rest of our friends. We were having a great time by the fire hanging out. I ended up standing with my back to the fire and got too close...as in the back of my knee rested against the fire ring. I was feeling no pain a the time (thank you Corona) and wiped my hand on the back of my leg and felt my skin peal off:( The next day it hurt like crazy...we had no bandages and I was lucky I didn't get an infection in the river. I have a very nasty scar still.

LonLB

Not really an injury but how about cramps (muscle cramps) while doing the deed. Cramps bad enough that things have to come to a screeching halt.

bio01979

Not really an injury but how about cramps (muscle cramps) while doing the deed. Cramps bad enough that things have to come to a screeching halt.

I get bad muscle cramps in my hip flexors, often - I just try to get him to switch positions lol no need to stop :P

PrincessYorga

This was over 10 years ago. I was out of college but still living in a college town. Some friends and I decided to have a night out on the town and I offered to be the DD for the night. Made our rounds at the bars and then decided to go to an after party at a friends house. As we were getting ready to leave, I was walking out the front door to the porch steps and saw a friend I had not seen in AGES. I got so excited that I started bounding down the porch stairs and somehow missed the last two stairs entirely. Remember the 2 stairs part.

Now I'm clumsy and fall a lot anyway and have a tendency to sprain/twist my ankles (I've always said I inherited my grandpa's weak ankles), so I thought this was just another twisted ankle and I'd be fine by morning. I had to call around to find someone to come pick up me and all of my drunk friends since I drove a stick and couldn't press down on the clutch lol. Everyone got home safely and I went to bed.

The next morning I woke up having pretty much forgotten the injury I sustained from the night before. That is until I tried to stand up to go to the restroom. I put weight on my leg and screamed and fell to the floor. Had to call my dad and my brother to come and get me and take me to the ER to get an xray. Find out that I had broken my leg/ankle in three places. Actually split my fibula bone and was told that it required surgery. The surgeon told me that I had to go on bed rest for a month to get the swelling to go down so that he could perform the surgery. Apparently if I had gone right after it had happened he would have performed emergency surgery before the swelling set in. But by that point my leg was so swollen he was afraid he wouldn't be able to sew me back together lol. Oh and nobody in the ER would believe that I was sober when this happened. I was asked multiple times by ER people if I had been drinking.

I now have 11 screws and a large plate in my leg from falling down 2 stairs while completely sober. My family still teases me about it.

I had a year and a half of physical therapy before I was able to walk "normally" again. I have no ankle to speak of on my left leg. I can feel the screws inside my leg (I still gag when I have to shave over the area where the plate is). My leg aches when the weather changes and sometimes the screws feel like they get a little out of place and I have sharp pains and trouble walking. I've thought about having the screws and plate removed but can't stomach the idea of another surgery like the last one!

Needless to say I am much more careful these days when going down the stairs. :-)

lilRicki

I was loser pissed at the bar when I was 18, wearing platform shoes and dancing like only a white small town girl can . I decided to take my shoes off and put them in the middle of the circle so I could get my groove on, and I ended up stepping on them and twisting my ankle. The next day I couldn't put any weight on it, so I crawled up the stairs, called for my dad and he took me to emergency...I ripped the crap out of my ankle. The doctor told me it would have been better if I just had a clean break. To this day it gets angry...so stupid :blushing:

PJ64

two years ago, I was having a little bit of rough sex and my (now ex) boyfriend ripped me a little.... level 1, 2 stitches and butt pillow.... yowch

the most embarrassing part was telling the er doc why....

You win.

Ouch,Agree WINNER!

JUDDDing

All of my injuries have been embarrassing to some degree.

Some highlights:

1. I'm 7 - my tree fort collapses and I fall, breaking my arm. Embarrassing part? It collapsed from the weight of the cinderblock wall I was building in it.
2. I'm 10 - I get a 4 inch scar on the side of my face. Embarrassing part? I get it from riding a _cow_ (actually a beefalo) when she scrapes me off on one of the stalls in the barn.
3. I'm 19 - I tear my meniscus after doing squats. Embarrassing part? I tear it 10 minutes later jumping up off the couch when an attractive insurance saleswoman rings my doorbell.
4. I'm 20 - I break my big toe playing basketball. Embarrassing part? I lost control of the ball during a lay up and then ran smack into the pole while trying to recover it.

There are, of course, many more from my late teens and early 20's with the normal "I was drunk" excuses. These ones are particularly bad because I was sober.

Mia_RagazzaTosta

I tried photobombing one of my friends by jumping (literally) into his video, but landed in a pothole and rolled my ankle so badly I let out a bloodcurdling scream that was caught on his tape. We were in a public place and I had to be carried out.

Two years later during the Insanity warmup, I rolled the same fcuking ankle. It didn't break either time and now it's just ugly and huge.

LonLB

When I was a kid I:

Tried to use the back of the couch as a balance beam, took a header off and hit the coffee table, missing my eye by a fraction of an inch. Stitches.

Slammed my hand in a sliding van door. Broken fingers.

Sat on a light bulb. Stitches. Yes, in my asscheek.


More recently

I put a squeeze bottle of honey in the microwave to remelt it down a teeny bit so it would squeeze out. Left it in there way too long, and when I went to take it out, the bottle collapsed in my hand. Boiling hot honey all over the back of it. Still have the scar.

I pulled out a stick blender (also called an immersion blender), plugged it in, and then noticed some gunk stuck in the blades. I tried to swipe a paper towel in there to clean it. Accidentally turned it on with my finger in there. Oddly enough, the paper towel didn't provide much protection. Stitches.

WOW.
You NEED to be careful. You sound like an accident waiting to happen.

tomomatic

I was about 13 when I was at a restaurant and saw a rat behind the toilet. Zipped up fast... too fast and ran out the door with my hands covering my unmentionables screaming like a little girl. I'm just glad everything still works.

LisaKunz

My uterus fell out while doing Jillian's 30 DS. Pulled the bladder down with it. Now 4 months post surgery. Very embarrassing to go to the doctor and tell them that I had parts hanging out...

PJ64

I had a vasectomy, the Doc told me to take a week off , no heavy lifting, blah,blah,blah

I played a Hockey tournament 5 days afterwards, the moring after the tournament
I woke up to one regular sized testicle and one the size of an orange. Telling the FEMALE ER doc was very interesting/embarrassing

mikee007

Was making a cup of tea once ( yes i am from England)

In the morning not long got up and was totally naked;)))

As i was squeezing the tea bag against the side of the cup ( yes you know whats coming) lol

It slipped out of my hand and went all over my wedding tackle (((

Had to drive to the chemist to get some burn cream with it all hanging out of my trousers (pants for our us friends)

With the air con on full trying to keep it cool lol

The worst bit was trying to tell the lady who was trying not to laugh what had happened lol

True story,Mikee

McCelmer

I was using resistance bands to do arm curls. I wanted to up the resistance so I thought I'd give myself less band and pull harder. At some point, the band snapped and I punched myself in the head.

lmao!

Gr8ChangesAhead

Tore my gastrocnemicus (aka - calf muscle) playing kickball after a few to many jello shots on Memorial Day, still in therapy, sucks !

matchbox_girl

I was moving a twin box spring in too much of a hurry, stepped off of a curb and, yes, broke my foot.....I wasn't convinced it was more than just a bad sprain until I could no longer put on my shoe and my foot was the color of a nasty black eye.....

cmpollard01

i'm a klutz, so i have tons of embarassing stories...here are the good ones!

1. senior year of college, stone cold sober, fell down three shallow steps at my apartment complex taking out the trash before Thanksgiving break. my poor tiny roommate couldn't help me get back up the stairs, so she had to call my best friend and get him to help. yeah-broke my ankle and barely missed bashing my head open on a crome bumper.

2. walking across a parking lot (dry), re-broke the same ankle...and to this day we don't know how that happened!

3. not too long in the past, my bf and i were...enjoying one another's company (so to speak)-with me in his "lap." i went to climb off, my leg slid, and i strained my hip and sprained my knee. i so didn't want to go to the dr, but he made me since this is a knee i've already had surgery on twice. it was really interesting to answer the "how did the injury occur" question!

kylamaries

When I was younger, my mom and I were going grocery shopping together. I stepped out of the car and the door began closing before I could stop it. My entire right hand was stuck in the locked door so there was absolutely nothing I could do. My mom assumed I was right behind her and hadn't noticed until she was already a few cars over and heard me begin screaming for her. Of course, she then had to simultaneously quiet me and fish the keys out of her purse to unlock the door (and we all KNOW how most moms' purses are a bottomless pit). I stood there sobbing uncontrollably until she could pry my fingers from the inside of the door. It was utterly humiliating at the time (and painful too)!

neandermagnon

I had one season of ice hockey where all the injuries I had were caused by messing around either off ice or messing around on the ice when not training or playing

they included:

- I did this thing that involved walking on the ceiling/somersault type thing on the bus (away trip) while holding the luggage rails, I fell off and landed so my shin was on the arm rest of one of the seats, i.e. the impact of my shin on the arm rest was with the force of my entire weight. Yes it hurt, I couldn't walk at all initially, I thought I'd broken my leg but actually I hadn't, seems my tibias are pretty strong.

- my team mate had a photo of me that was embarrassing (can't remember what was in the photo) anyway she was holding it out of my reach (I'm not very tall) and I was jumping up to get it, this was in the dressing room before training, anyway she was jumping up to stop me getting it, and she was wearing skates and I wasn't.... that ended with me in A&E getting my foot stitched up, having to miss training, having to miss a ladies' game at the weekend, having to explain to the under 19's boys team coach why I couldn't play that weekend (they had some rule whereby women could subtract 2 years off their age to play in the junior boys' teams, which I did) so basically I got told off by two coaches, not just one

- I was playing football on ice with a bunch of guys (not in kit), and this boy did a sliding tackle on me and his skate went into my leg. Fortunately I was wearing jeans so it wasn't an actual skate cut, just an abrasion from denim where his skate hit my leg. That could have been a lot worse.

- I hurt my wrist playing take-down British bulldog on ice. (also not in kit and I was the only female playing) the technique was to grab the guy by the shirt on the back of his shoulders as he skated past to take him down. You were out if someone took you right down so you were on your back. I played this many times and was good at it, but one time I hurt my wrist taking some guy down. That was an interesting one to explain to the coach....

All in the same season.

brevislux

When I was five I climbed on a huge empty metal container (we grew fruit for sale and it's meant to go on a tractor or truck). I fell in and broke my arm.

I sprained my ankle on a school trip at age 16 when we were locked inside the room for too long. I didn't know how high the window was and jumped out. I landed right at the kids who were hiding and smoking behind the building. They ran away screaming into the woods.

TinaRoberts67

Last week I was getting up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I guess I was closer to the side than I thought because when I rolled out I fell onto my knees and smacked myself right between the eyes with corner of my nightstand.

Then a couple days later I took a tumble stepping down of a step and skinned the heck out of my knee, the embarrassing part of that was it was an a** over head type fall I wasn't hurt bad but I was glad there was no one around to see me flop around like a fish out of water.

12skipafew99100

There was that little episode I had with the French courtesan, 23 pounds of strawberry jam, a tricycle and a pair of dice. But it is such a common tale I don't want to bore you with the details.

Oh yea that................I hate when that happens.

hOw2lozeAgiN10dAze

About a year and a half ago I had a lapse in judgment, and jumped off this 50 foot cliff into an abandoned quarry.



Botched my landing and ended up looking like this:





From my knees to waist. I couldn't sit down for over a month.