Women shouldn't have muscles......
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Everyone has different tastes for how much muscle they think is attractive on the opposite sex.
You might have more muscle than most men like, just like male bodybuilders have more muscle than most women like. You can't be pissed off that that's what most people like, and think that they should change and like more muscle. Just don't worry about it, focus on what makes you happy and on the guys who do like muscles on their girls.
Also, men not liking muscly women has nothing to do with being insecure in their masculinity... why would u think that?
The only muscles that aren't attractive on women are those that were granted by steroids. Other than that, I've always found it to be a major turn-on !!0 -
heyimamermaid wrote: »nobody's opinion bothers me tbh
Me too. A long while ago I read a quote saying: "Other peoples' opinion of me are none of my business." Try quoting that to them and politely asking them to keep their opinions to themselves from now on. It's helped me get through this kind of thing and a lot more! lol
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I can't relate to your specific problem, since I'm not quite at the point in my fitness where people are seeing me as too muscular! But I can relate to the more general problem of having people critique you for achieving in ways that are supposedly un-feminine. In my case, I have a Ph.D. in a science-oriented field. I've had a lot "Oh you'd have more dates if you would just act a little more dumb and helpless" commentary in my life and truth be told... they are right. A lot of men find brainy women un-sexy. A lot of men find physically strong women like you un-sexy. But the thing is, are these really the type of guys that we want to attract?? I don't.
People who take this approach to life are a little sad to me, always contorting themselves into whatever they think the opposite sex is going to like, in the end winning someone who is attracted to a fake version of who they really are.
My approach is to be the best version of ME, and if that means that I don't win the majority vote in a hotness competition, so be it. When it comes to dating, I'm okay with being in a "niche market". I'm only looking for ONE guy who is compatible with someone like me, not the general population of males. If that one guy doesn't come along, so be it. I'm living the way I want to be living.0 -
How you doin'?Docbanana2002 wrote: »I can't relate to your specific problem, since I'm not quite at the point in my fitness where people are seeing me as too muscular! But I can relate to the more general problem of having people critique you for achieving in ways that are supposedly un-feminine. In my case, I have a Ph.D. in a science-oriented field. I've had a lot "Oh you'd have more dates if you would just act a little more dumb and helpless" commentary in my life and truth be told... they are right. A lot of men find brainy women un-sexy. A lot of men find physically strong women like you un-sexy. But the thing is, are these really the type of guys that we want to attract?? I don't.
People who take this approach to life are a little sad to me, always contorting themselves into whatever they think the opposite sex is going to like, in the end winning someone who is attracted to a fake version of who they really are.
My approach is to be the best version of ME, and if that means that I don't win the majority vote in a hotness competition, so be it. When it comes to dating, I'm okay with being in a "niche market". I'm only looking for ONE guy who is compatible with someone like me, not the general population of males. If that one guy doesn't come along, so be it. I'm living the way I want to be living.
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well said!0
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Docbanana2002 wrote: »I can't relate to your specific problem, since I'm not quite at the point in my fitness where people are seeing me as too muscular! But I can relate to the more general problem of having people critique you for achieving in ways that are supposedly un-feminine. In my case, I have a Ph.D. in a science-oriented field. I've had a lot "Oh you'd have more dates if you would just act a little more dumb and helpless" commentary in my life and truth be told... they are right. A lot of men find brainy women un-sexy. A lot of men find physically strong women like you un-sexy. But the thing is, are these really the type of guys that we want to attract?? I don't.
People who take this approach to life are a little sad to me, always contorting themselves into whatever they think the opposite sex is going to like, in the end winning someone who is attracted to a fake version of who they really are.
My approach is to be the best version of ME, and if that means that I don't win the majority vote in a hotness competition, so be it. When it comes to dating, I'm okay with being in a "niche market". I'm only looking for ONE guy who is compatible with someone like me, not the general population of males. If that one guy doesn't come along, so be it. I'm living the way I want to be living.
Very well said. And a some of the Women who have given me a hard time are exactly the type you described. Always looking to attract Men & make people "jealous" of how good they think they look. I do all this for me & nobody else.
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I share random pictures of fit/muscled women at work and my coworkers don't like that look -- I happen to think it makes women look hot.... I guess it's dependent on individual tastes.
I agree with this. Not everyone will find everyone attractive right? I mean there are some guys who like BIG women . . . like B . I . G . and I just don't get it. I used to be one of them at 340lbs and it's not super attractive (in my mind) but my ex told me when I got to ~270lbs that I was getting too small and I wasn't as attractive as I was before.
It's really dependent on individual preference I think. Just like for me, I like tall guys who are solid build . . . I don't wanna feel like I might break him lol. It's just what each person likes I suppose.0 -
Docbanana2002 wrote: »I can't relate to your specific problem, since I'm not quite at the point in my fitness where people are seeing me as too muscular! But I can relate to the more general problem of having people critique you for achieving in ways that are supposedly un-feminine. In my case, I have a Ph.D. in a science-oriented field. I've had a lot "Oh you'd have more dates if you would just act a little more dumb and helpless" commentary in my life and truth be told... they are right. A lot of men find brainy women un-sexy. A lot of men find physically strong women like you un-sexy. But the thing is, are these really the type of guys that we want to attract?? I don't.
People who take this approach to life are a little sad to me, always contorting themselves into whatever they think the opposite sex is going to like, in the end winning someone who is attracted to a fake version of who they really are.
My approach is to be the best version of ME, and if that means that I don't win the majority vote in a hotness competition, so be it. When it comes to dating, I'm okay with being in a "niche market". I'm only looking for ONE guy who is compatible with someone like me, not the general population of males. If that one guy doesn't come along, so be it. I'm living the way I want to be living.
You've been told you'd attract more men by acting dumb and helpless?? Where do you live?0 -
Docbanana2002 wrote: »I can't relate to your specific problem, since I'm not quite at the point in my fitness where people are seeing me as too muscular! But I can relate to the more general problem of having people critique you for achieving in ways that are supposedly un-feminine. In my case, I have a Ph.D. in a science-oriented field. I've had a lot "Oh you'd have more dates if you would just act a little more dumb and helpless" commentary in my life and truth be told... they are right. A lot of men find brainy women un-sexy. A lot of men find physically strong women like you un-sexy. But the thing is, are these really the type of guys that we want to attract?? I don't.
People who take this approach to life are a little sad to me, always contorting themselves into whatever they think the opposite sex is going to like, in the end winning someone who is attracted to a fake version of who they really are.
My approach is to be the best version of ME, and if that means that I don't win the majority vote in a hotness competition, so be it. When it comes to dating, I'm okay with being in a "niche market". I'm only looking for ONE guy who is compatible with someone like me, not the general population of males. If that one guy doesn't come along, so be it. I'm living the way I want to be living.
Totally agree! I have a really good job where I make a really good income - I'm single, I'm a runner, I'm at the gym 6 days/week, I've dropped a lot of weight, I have a lot of friends (now) and I travel. I have a lot going for me and I have a promising career (hopefully! lol) ahead of me. From my experience in the dating world there are two kinds of reactions to my situation: 1) oooh she's got a lot of money, I'll use her up for what she's got for now and 2) they find it really emasculating (sp?) that I make as much money as I do and I've even had guys say to me that no one will want to be with a woman who is so independent.
I'm thinking really - you don't want to be with a partner knowing they are with you because they want to be with you and not because financially they have to be?
It means I'm single (for now) but the majority of men (I've gone out with - not speaking for ALL men here ** very important to note) fall into scenario #2 where they find it really intimidating that I make good money and that I am not afraid to be on my own - I don't need a man - scares them, a lot. I'm a no nonsense kind of person - if you want to see me or hang out with me, say it, let me know. I can't read your mind. I'm not going to play hard to get - if I don't text you back it's because I'm busy and I'm not attached to my phone 24/7. I don't play games, if I like you you will know it. The dating world is brutal and I've had very little success but it's mostly because I'm not interested in playing games. I'm not interested in the little dance people do before they can just say hey, I like you and I want to get to know you more. I simply just say it if I feel it. I'm not clingy and I have my own life - yeh I want to see you and hang out with you, but no I do not want to be joined at the hip.
These definitely aren't the men I want to attract and the right one won't care what I make, or if I have debt, or if I own my car, or whatever - he will just be the right person for me. I'm happy with me right now and that's that.0 -
I hate when people say "but men don't like that" Ok and your point? Because all my attempts to better my body are only for the pleasure of men? LOL STFU0
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I hate when people say "but men don't like that" Ok and your point? Because all my attempts to better my body are only for the pleasure of men? LOL STFU
I put those people in the same category who talk about how Men don't like too much make-up & blah, blah, blah. I do nothing for the benefit of pleasing a Man. I am who I am & they cane take it or leave it. Sorry not sorry.
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I hate when people say "but men don't like that" Ok and your point? Because all my attempts to better my body are only for the pleasure of men? LOL STFU
I put those people in the same category who talk about how Men don't like too much make-up & blah, blah, blah. I do nothing for the benefit of pleasing a Man. I am who I am & they cane take it or leave it. Sorry not sorry.
Don't be sorry.
That itself is quite attractive.
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@Riz72 Do you think Dana Linn Bailey is too muscular?0
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There are 2 opinions I care about.....Mine and my hubby's.... He is liking the changes in my muscle definition, and likes to comment on my newly acquired "butt" and "guns".....LOL0
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mitchelsimps wrote: »
I've been trying to look like Yaxeni Oriquen, but it's impossible without PEDs.0 -
mitchelsimps wrote: »
I've been trying to look like Yaxeni Oriquen, but it's impossible without PEDs.
Oh sorry like i said it was personal preference there is nothing wrong with her
never say impossible never give up never back down! If you want to be like her then go for it 0 -
mitchelsimps wrote: »mitchelsimps wrote: »
I've been trying to look like Yaxeni Oriquen, but it's impossible without PEDs.
Oh sorry like i said it was personal preference there is nothing wrong with her never say impossible never give up never back down! If you want to be like her then go for it
No, it really is impossible as a natural athlete to get as big as she is.0 -
I had one lady I was working with she said women are suppose to be soft and real women have curves. WHAT? To me she was saying that to justify remaining on the larger side and her avoiding the fact that she was making very poor decisions about her diet. Also I am a real woman and I do have curves, but they are the curves that you see when you flex.0
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