Is anyone being told they lost to much weight?
Robinmariesmith
Posts: 3 Member
Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.
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Replies
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i would go by the scales and you can ask your doctor if your weight is in the healthy range your height. this pre-assumes that you haven't gone overboard in your efforts to lose weight too quickly. without knowing what you look like or who is telling you this i would suggest that whoever is telling you this will just have to get used to the look of the new you.0
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I have been told that so I gained 10 pounds back and that stopped the talk. Now I have 35 more pounds to lose but I know some of the 10 pounds I have regained over the past three months is much needed muscle. I can walk longer now.
@Robinmariesmith and @tahn1000 welcome to MFP forums.0 -
Robinmariesmith wrote: »Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.
I'm the opposite. All my jeans are snug in the backside with a huge gap at the waist.
I've had people suggest to me I should stop losing weight. (This was 8 months into maintenance). I've had people tell me they think the best weight for my body is about 25 pounds more than I currently weigh. I've had people tell me I'm too skinny, and people tell me I look great. Fortunately the only person's opinion I care about is my husband's, and he has loved me at each and every weight I've ever been over the past 20 years.
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MissJay you are lucky to have such a wonderful husband. I'm only in the 1st month of my new journey so I am looking forward to someone telling me they think I've lost too much weight. Robin, only you and your doctor know enough to decide what is your healthy weight. Opinions can be helpful but should only be considered suggestions. Maybe a style change is in order now that you thinner. Choose a style that accentuates your cute lil behind and camouflages your fluffy tummy. Feel great, look great.0
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I heard this today from someone who is my same height and weighs 50 lbs less! I'm still 20+ lbs from healthy bmi, so what do they know? Guess I'll just take it as a compliment.0
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I guess I'm doubly blest, I have a husband who has loved me at every weight and the only thing I've heard is how fantastic I look. No one has called me too skinny.0
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It is no ones business, and I find quite offensive when someone brings up my weight without me asking for their opinion specifically.
In case you are wondering if you are reaching that point, I would designate 1 or 2 people that you trust 100% and that you believe they would give you the honest truth regardless of how they feel (because Hey - when you lose weight, some people around you start to get jealous and insecure about their own weight issues).
Have these 1 or 2 people tell you when they think you are getting to the point of being an unhealthy weight, and stick with that opinion, check in with them once in a while and ask them what they think. I know for myself, after losing over 100lbs - my perception is absolutely skewed beyond belief! I can not trust my own eyes to see the progress in the mirror.0 -
Thanks everyone for the advice, it's very helpful, my daughter and sister think I'm fine and I do trust there opinion!0
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So much of it is the old perception others have of you. I have a friend who lost a lot of weight and was at his healthy weight for his build and height. To me? I wondered where my old friend went to. I liked the larger version of him better..because that is what I was used to. That was my problem…not his.0
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Oh yasss a lot. There are people who tell me I'm too skinny, that are "worried" about my health, but also there are people who think i look great, healthy, that i never looked better. When i had more weight some.people were talking i'm fat unhealthy etc... Point is, people will always talk and talk and talk and never stop talking even if you didnt ask for their opinion, people who are always negative, unsupportive... I dont listen anymore. The opinion i care most about is mine. How i feel about myself. On a second place my boyfriends opinion. But he liked me when i had 13kg more and likes me now. I just ask myself, do i feel healthy? Am i satisfied with how i look? And yes, i never felt better, healthier, and finally i'm happy with how i look and finally i love my body after all this time. Thats all that matters0
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I've only been told I've lost too much weight by fat, failed, former dieters.0
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The only people who have told me at times that I'm looking too thin and to eat more/stop losing weight are my mom and my mother-in-law. And they both say that when I'm at the weight I like best for myself and at which I feel most energetic/athletic/good! Everyone else seems to think I look fabulous at those times, though occasionally they sound envious rather than complimentary. My fat lives mainly on my tummy, even when I'm right in the middle of my 3-5 lb maintenance range, so I'm happiest at the bottom of that range. I am very active, I eat a fair amount of food for a petite person, and it's important to me to look and feel good! It's hard not to listen when my mom starts saying she thinks I am too thin, but I was pudgy since I was about 11 and only lost the extra weight a couple years ago (I'm now in my late twenties), so she has seen me at a rather plump size for most of my teen/adult life. So I try hard to stick to what makes me happy.0
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dakotababy wrote: »It is no ones business, and I find quite offensive when someone brings up my weight without me asking for their opinion specifically.
In case you are wondering if you are reaching that point, I would designate 1 or 2 people that you trust 100% and that you believe they would give you the honest truth regardless of how they feel (because Hey - when you lose weight, some people around you start to get jealous and insecure about their own weight issues).
Have these 1 or 2 people tell you when they think you are getting to the point of being an unhealthy weight, and stick with that opinion, check in with them once in a while and ask them what they think. I know for myself, after losing over 100lbs - my perception is absolutely skewed beyond belief! I can not trust my own eyes to see the progress in the mirror.
THIS.
I always get told "stop losing too much weight you're getting too skinny" by the larger ladies in the office. Not by the thin ones.
And I'm not "too skinny" - nowhere near it. I'm currently at a normal range where if I wanted to stop and maintain it would be adequate (20% BF). BUT - I want muscles so I'm still "dieting" and all that stuff. Just wait till I start looking like a HUlk and see what their comments will be... LOL!!!!
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The majority of the world is overweight.
People don't know anymore what a healthy weight looks like. Or they want everyone to stay as fat and miserable as them.0 -
The majority of the world is overweight.
People don't know anymore what a healthy weight looks like. Or they want everyone to stay as fat and miserable as them.
This. Exactly. I have gained 10 lbs in the last few years (which is almost 10% of my body weight--Im a petite one) and people tell me I look "wonderful, perfect, so fit and if I were to lose weight I would be too skinny." What is important is how you feel, everyone else's opinion is colored by their own feelings about their own body and perhaps some jealousy.
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Robinmariesmith wrote: »Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.
I'm the opposite. All my jeans are snug in the backside with a huge gap at the waist.
I've had people suggest to me I should stop losing weight. (This was 8 months into maintenance). I've had people tell me they think the best weight for my body is about 25 pounds more than I currently weigh. I've had people tell me I'm too skinny, and people tell me I look great. Fortunately the only person's opinion I care about is my husband's, and he has loved me at each and every weight I've ever been over the past 20 years.
What about your own opinion?
If my husband didn't like my weight it would literally mean nothing to me and he would be in the wrong.
If one hinges a partner's approval with their own satisfaction, then they must also yoke that person's dissatisfaction with one's own.
Dangerous games.
It works for you in practise which is great. It isn't very good in principle because it lowers our estimation of our own worth to only as high as someone else's.
To the OP: if you like your weight and feel healthy and strong, screw em all. Your weight and your body are no one's business but your own. Keep up the great work.
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Tbf as a younger adult I lived in a place where the majority of people are obese and I was fairly curvy but was constantly told how tiny and thin I was. I am much thinner and healthier now. Compared to them, I was indeed tiny. In my own body I was actually slightly too heavy.
A lot of those expectations are 100% social and based on what the others around you look and feel like.0 -
I've had people tell me that they hope I'm done losing weight but I think they were so used to seeing me so overweight for so long, they aren't used to seeing me thin. I just hit a normal BMI so it's not like I'm anywhere near too thin. I have 6 more pounds to my goal and many roll their eye when I tell them that. My goal is 125 and I'm only 5'1" so that's not too skinny!0
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I haven't been told I've lost 'too much' but that I should 'stop' because I'm 'fine now'. Gee, thanks!0
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I get that all the time. My face, stomach and arms are where I want them to be but I still have HUGE thighs, and buttocks. People see you differently then you see yourself I guess. I know these comments are usually meant as a compliment but they sure can be taken the wrong way.
Being told I am skinny wouldn't bother me much, being told I am 'fine' now...would piss me off. I'd be like.."fine is exactly what I was going for...jerk"PinkPixiexox wrote: »I haven't been told I've lost 'too much' but that I should 'stop' because I'm 'fine now'. Gee, thanks!
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I am 70 yrs young ! 6 yrs ago my family did a biggest loser challenge...I lost a much needed-to-lose 60 lbs !
Since then I slowly gained back 30 lbs....this year with the help/support of my younger family, we began a quest to get back in shape and lose those unwanted lbs...I began walking,doing floor exercises, and dumbells for an overall fitness routine...I am within 2 lbs of my weight loss of 2009. My POINT BEING...at that time, I was tired of exercising...I lost 60 lbs in a year...I had a great routine...but by the time it was over I was DONE ! I took 6 months off and began gaining it back! I began my new routine about 7 months ago. I dropped 10 lbs...in July I got serious when the 'kids' said lets do a challenge ! I signed up with FitnessPal, another tracking app all coupled with my bracelt ! Keeping myself accountable each day is my key to weightloss and maintenance...I know some folks weigh weekly...I weigh daily...it is part of my routine when I rise in the morning. It drives me nuts when I plateau and do not lose ... or gain a lb ... during a week....but I continue my routine. What will I do when I lose the final 5 lbs? I dont know...It depends on whether or not those size 12's, which have been laying on the shelf of my closet for a few yrs, fit me. I do not want to go back to where I was ! I read on another blog...DO NOT EAT THE CALORIES YOU EXERCISED! that makes sense. I pay attention to my food consumption via FitnessPal, my weight and exercise time. At this time I walk an hour+ at least 5 days a week, plus the extra's.
FIND A MAINTENANCE PROGRAM WHICH WORKS FOR YOU AND STICK TO IT ! Don't experience the pain of gaining back those lbs you worked so hard to lose !0 -
When I lost a lot of weight row years ago my grandma was "worried" I was starving myself and over-exercising.. This was said while we were eating McDonald's and at that stage I was only doing 3 crossfit sessions a week haha0
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Hhhhmmm. My situation is a little different. My sweet Mom is 79 and her filter is fading as fast as her memory. We live in different cities, so we connect via phone most of the time. Here's part of our conversation from Monday:
MOM: Are you still on that diet?
ME: Yes Mom. I've lost 51 lbs so far!
MOM: WOW, How much do you weigh now?
ME: I weigh 196 (said proudly).
MOM: Ohhh (dramatic pause), well you've got some more to do then don't you.
ME: Yes Mom. I've got 16 more lbs to lose, my target weight is 180 (said less proudly).
MOM: Are you sure that's enough?
ME: Mom, I'm 53 years old and 6' tall and I've been lifting weights for 9 months - 180 will be awesome. I haven't weighed 180 since I got married.
MOM: Well, I'll let you know when we see each other at Thanksgiving.
I just smiled to myself and shook my head. She cracks me up. Can't wait to see her and give her a big hug. This would make a great SNL skit - I can just imagine being a bystander and watching this conversation unfold.0 -
cdcllcga01 wrote: »Hhhhmmm. My situation is a little different. My sweet Mom is 79 and her filter is fading as fast as her memory. We live in different cities, so we connect via phone most of the time. Here's part of our conversation from Monday:
MOM: Are you still on that diet?
ME: Yes Mom. I've lost 51 lbs so far!
MOM: WOW, How much do you weigh now?
ME: I weigh 196 (said proudly).
MOM: Ohhh (dramatic pause), well you've got some more to do then don't you.
ME: Yes Mom. I've got 16 more lbs to lose, my target weight is 180 (said less proudly).
MOM: Are you sure that's enough?
ME: Mom, I'm 53 years old and 6' tall and I've been lifting weights for 9 months - 180 will be awesome. I haven't weighed 180 since I got married.
MOM: Well, I'll let you know when we see each other at Thanksgiving.
I just smiled to myself and shook my head. She cracks me up. Can't wait to see her and give her a big hug. This would make a great SNL skit - I can just imagine being a bystander and watching this conversation unfold.
I love this! lol reminds me of my Grandmother. When I lost weight she would talk so positively to me about it and congratulate me every time she seen me. Then 6-12 months later I started gaining some back. Like 15 pounds I guess and I visited her on Christmas last year and she hugged me and said "You're not pregnant again are you?" sooooo serious. I was like ... 'No Granny, just gaining a little weight back' she looked me over 2 times and said "Well you sure are aren't you." I LOL'd so hard.0 -
Shereewhitney88 wrote: »cdcllcga01 wrote: »Hhhhmmm. My situation is a little different. My sweet Mom is 79 and her filter is fading as fast as her memory. We live in different cities, so we connect via phone most of the time. Here's part of our conversation from Monday:
MOM: Are you still on that diet?
ME: Yes Mom. I've lost 51 lbs so far!
MOM: WOW, How much do you weigh now?
ME: I weigh 196 (said proudly).
MOM: Ohhh (dramatic pause), well you've got some more to do then don't you.
ME: Yes Mom. I've got 16 more lbs to lose, my target weight is 180 (said less proudly).
MOM: Are you sure that's enough?
ME: Mom, I'm 53 years old and 6' tall and I've been lifting weights for 9 months - 180 will be awesome. I haven't weighed 180 since I got married.
MOM: Well, I'll let you know when we see each other at Thanksgiving.
I just smiled to myself and shook my head. She cracks me up. Can't wait to see her and give her a big hug. This would make a great SNL skit - I can just imagine being a bystander and watching this conversation unfold.
I love this! lol reminds me of my Grandmother. When I lost weight she would talk so positively to me about it and congratulate me every time she seen me. Then 6-12 months later I started gaining some back. Like 15 pounds I guess and I visited her on Christmas last year and she hugged me and said "You're not pregnant again are you?" sooooo serious. I was like ... 'No Granny, just gaining a little weight back' she looked me over 2 times and said "Well you sure are aren't you." I LOL'd so hard.
Nice! They both make great accountability buddies don't they? God love 'em!0 -
I have been told this a lot. SW was almost 300 pounds, so i had a lot of weight to lose, but people see me now and automatically assume that i weigh less than i do because i carry my weight well. So i have been told that my 208 pound body looks like i am 150 pounds, so it is time to stop now, because i am too thin. I laugh every time. When i tell them they have no idea what they are talking about, and how much i actually weigh, they dont believe me.!!I love being tall, it fools the eye!!! Besides, my husband , my opinion is the only opinion that matters, and i want to at least get out of the 200's, then i will be happy, and if they dont like what they see,.....dont look!!!0
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While people certainly develop negative images of themselves and sometimes can't see how good they look, people also tend to react badly to change and are used to a heavier you. Just remember they're just looking out for you
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My mom told me she was worried when I wasn't losing weight in a healthy manner. If anything, I kinda wish more people would have said something about it sooner.0
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I get it all the time. I carry weight on my stomach which seems to be the last place it's shifting from. I don't really care what people say though
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