Is anyone being told they lost to much weight?

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Robinmariesmith
Robinmariesmith Posts: 3 Member
in Goal: Maintaining Weight
Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.
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Replies

  • tahn1000
    tahn1000 Posts: 10 Member
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    i would go by the scales and you can ask your doctor if your weight is in the healthy range your height. this pre-assumes that you haven't gone overboard in your efforts to lose weight too quickly. without knowing what you look like or who is telling you this i would suggest that whoever is telling you this will just have to get used to the look of the new you.
  • GaleHawkins
    GaleHawkins Posts: 8,160 Member
    edited November 2015
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    I have been told that so I gained 10 pounds back and that stopped the talk. Now I have 35 more pounds to lose but I know some of the 10 pounds I have regained over the past three months is much needed muscle. I can walk longer now.

    @Robinmariesmith and @tahn1000 welcome to MFP forums.
  • MissJay75
    MissJay75 Posts: 768 Member
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    Robinmariesmith wrote: »
    Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.

    I'm the opposite. All my jeans are snug in the backside with a huge gap at the waist.

    I've had people suggest to me I should stop losing weight. (This was 8 months into maintenance). I've had people tell me they think the best weight for my body is about 25 pounds more than I currently weigh. I've had people tell me I'm too skinny, and people tell me I look great. Fortunately the only person's opinion I care about is my husband's, and he has loved me at each and every weight I've ever been over the past 20 years.

  • Living360
    Living360 Posts: 223 Member
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    MissJay you are lucky to have such a wonderful husband. I'm only in the 1st month of my new journey so I am looking forward to someone telling me they think I've lost too much weight. Robin, only you and your doctor know enough to decide what is your healthy weight. Opinions can be helpful but should only be considered suggestions. Maybe a style change is in order now that you thinner. Choose a style that accentuates your cute lil behind and camouflages your fluffy tummy. Feel great, look great.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
    edited November 2015
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    I heard this today from someone who is my same height and weighs 50 lbs less! I'm still 20+ lbs from healthy bmi, so what do they know? Guess I'll just take it as a compliment.
  • BikeTourer
    BikeTourer Posts: 191 Member
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    I guess I'm doubly blest, I have a husband who has loved me at every weight and the only thing I've heard is how fantastic I look. No one has called me too skinny.
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    It is no ones business, and I find quite offensive when someone brings up my weight without me asking for their opinion specifically.

    In case you are wondering if you are reaching that point, I would designate 1 or 2 people that you trust 100% and that you believe they would give you the honest truth regardless of how they feel (because Hey - when you lose weight, some people around you start to get jealous and insecure about their own weight issues).

    Have these 1 or 2 people tell you when they think you are getting to the point of being an unhealthy weight, and stick with that opinion, check in with them once in a while and ask them what they think. I know for myself, after losing over 100lbs - my perception is absolutely skewed beyond belief! I can not trust my own eyes to see the progress in the mirror.
  • Robinmariesmith
    Robinmariesmith Posts: 3 Member
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    Thanks everyone for the advice, it's very helpful, my daughter and sister think I'm fine and I do trust there opinion!
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,287 Member
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    So much of it is the old perception others have of you. I have a friend who lost a lot of weight and was at his healthy weight for his build and height. To me? I wondered where my old friend went to. I liked the larger version of him better..because that is what I was used to. That was my problem…not his.
  • jelenacrnic
    jelenacrnic Posts: 15 Member
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    Oh yasss a lot. There are people who tell me I'm too skinny, that are "worried" about my health, but also there are people who think i look great, healthy, that i never looked better. When i had more weight some.people were talking i'm fat unhealthy etc... Point is, people will always talk and talk and talk and never stop talking even if you didnt ask for their opinion, people who are always negative, unsupportive... I dont listen anymore. The opinion i care most about is mine. How i feel about myself. On a second place my boyfriends opinion. But he liked me when i had 13kg more and likes me now. I just ask myself, do i feel healthy? Am i satisfied with how i look? And yes, i never felt better, healthier, and finally i'm happy with how i look and finally i love my body after all this time. Thats all that matters
  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,811 Member
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    I've only been told I've lost too much weight by fat, failed, former dieters.
  • Linnaea27
    Linnaea27 Posts: 639 Member
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    The only people who have told me at times that I'm looking too thin and to eat more/stop losing weight are my mom and my mother-in-law. And they both say that when I'm at the weight I like best for myself and at which I feel most energetic/athletic/good! Everyone else seems to think I look fabulous at those times, though occasionally they sound envious rather than complimentary. My fat lives mainly on my tummy, even when I'm right in the middle of my 3-5 lb maintenance range, so I'm happiest at the bottom of that range. I am very active, I eat a fair amount of food for a petite person, and it's important to me to look and feel good! It's hard not to listen when my mom starts saying she thinks I am too thin, but I was pudgy since I was about 11 and only lost the extra weight a couple years ago (I'm now in my late twenties), so she has seen me at a rather plump size for most of my teen/adult life. So I try hard to stick to what makes me happy.
  • Cahgetsfit
    Cahgetsfit Posts: 1,912 Member
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    dakotababy wrote: »
    It is no ones business, and I find quite offensive when someone brings up my weight without me asking for their opinion specifically.

    In case you are wondering if you are reaching that point, I would designate 1 or 2 people that you trust 100% and that you believe they would give you the honest truth regardless of how they feel (because Hey - when you lose weight, some people around you start to get jealous and insecure about their own weight issues).

    Have these 1 or 2 people tell you when they think you are getting to the point of being an unhealthy weight, and stick with that opinion, check in with them once in a while and ask them what they think. I know for myself, after losing over 100lbs - my perception is absolutely skewed beyond belief! I can not trust my own eyes to see the progress in the mirror.

    THIS.

    I always get told "stop losing too much weight you're getting too skinny" by the larger ladies in the office. Not by the thin ones.

    And I'm not "too skinny" - nowhere near it. I'm currently at a normal range where if I wanted to stop and maintain it would be adequate (20% BF). BUT - I want muscles so I'm still "dieting" and all that stuff. Just wait till I start looking like a HUlk and see what their comments will be... LOL!!!!
  • siluridae
    siluridae Posts: 188 Member
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    The majority of the world is overweight.
    People don't know anymore what a healthy weight looks like. Or they want everyone to stay as fat and miserable as them.
  • amillenium
    amillenium Posts: 281 Member
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    siluridae wrote: »
    The majority of the world is overweight.
    People don't know anymore what a healthy weight looks like. Or they want everyone to stay as fat and miserable as them.


    This. Exactly. I have gained 10 lbs in the last few years (which is almost 10% of my body weight--Im a petite one) and people tell me I look "wonderful, perfect, so fit and if I were to lose weight I would be too skinny." What is important is how you feel, everyone else's opinion is colored by their own feelings about their own body and perhaps some jealousy.
  • lifeandleaves
    lifeandleaves Posts: 97 Member
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    MissJay75 wrote: »
    Robinmariesmith wrote: »
    Is anyone else being told they lost to much weight, I struggle with this because I hold my weight in my stomach which I don't like, but I lose my butt when I lose the weight, I look healthy, but just have a small backside.

    I'm the opposite. All my jeans are snug in the backside with a huge gap at the waist.

    I've had people suggest to me I should stop losing weight. (This was 8 months into maintenance). I've had people tell me they think the best weight for my body is about 25 pounds more than I currently weigh. I've had people tell me I'm too skinny, and people tell me I look great. Fortunately the only person's opinion I care about is my husband's, and he has loved me at each and every weight I've ever been over the past 20 years.

    What about your own opinion?

    If my husband didn't like my weight it would literally mean nothing to me and he would be in the wrong.

    If one hinges a partner's approval with their own satisfaction, then they must also yoke that person's dissatisfaction with one's own.
    Dangerous games.

    It works for you in practise which is great. It isn't very good in principle because it lowers our estimation of our own worth to only as high as someone else's.

    To the OP: if you like your weight and feel healthy and strong, screw em all. Your weight and your body are no one's business but your own. Keep up the great work. :smile:
  • lifeandleaves
    lifeandleaves Posts: 97 Member
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    Tbf as a younger adult I lived in a place where the majority of people are obese and I was fairly curvy but was constantly told how tiny and thin I was. I am much thinner and healthier now. Compared to them, I was indeed tiny. In my own body I was actually slightly too heavy.

    A lot of those expectations are 100% social and based on what the others around you look and feel like.
  • haydiz70
    haydiz70 Posts: 56 Member
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    I've had people tell me that they hope I'm done losing weight but I think they were so used to seeing me so overweight for so long, they aren't used to seeing me thin. I just hit a normal BMI so it's not like I'm anywhere near too thin. I have 6 more pounds to my goal and many roll their eye when I tell them that. My goal is 125 and I'm only 5'1" so that's not too skinny!
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
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    I haven't been told I've lost 'too much' but that I should 'stop' because I'm 'fine now'. Gee, thanks!
  • riffraff2112
    riffraff2112 Posts: 1,757 Member
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    I get that all the time. My face, stomach and arms are where I want them to be but I still have HUGE thighs, and buttocks. People see you differently then you see yourself I guess. I know these comments are usually meant as a compliment but they sure can be taken the wrong way.
    Being told I am skinny wouldn't bother me much, being told I am 'fine' now...would piss me off. I'd be like.."fine is exactly what I was going for...jerk"
    PinkPixiexox wrote: »
    I haven't been told I've lost 'too much' but that I should 'stop' because I'm 'fine now'. Gee, thanks!

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