Advice for someone who hates exercise?

cnbbnc · December 2015

You've gotten plenty of great suggestions, but I just wanted to comment on your eating vs your friends. I too thought something was different for me because no matter what I did, weight wouldn't come off. (I'm small stature too) I attributed it to getting older, but....I was wrong. I was simply eating over my calories. Once I got good with weighing/logging food, the weight started falling off me. Ultimately this is what will get you where you want to be for dropping pounds.

ninerbuff · December 2015

aggelikik wrote: »

nytoco wrote: »

I don't know how you can say that's impossible. I know for a fact that when I was younger, I would eat all the calories in the world and it didn't catch up to me for years. I barely moved either -- I'd stay inside all day on my computer. Yet I was underweight for my height until I physically matured and ballooned up.
I'm not saying I have any metabolic disorders. In fact, every woman on my dad's side of the family for a few generations has had a phase in their life around my age where they gained a lot of weight very quickly and then lost it and stayed thin until middle age. So I'm sure this is normal and will pass when I get more active. However, I'm just saying that I'm not fortunate enough to be able to eat whatever I want anymore without facing repercussions when I step on the scale the next day.

YOU ARE 18! When you were younger, you were growing.

This. As a kid I ate basically everything and stayed skinny...............till I turned 19 and started working out and eating more to gain weight.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

scolaris · December 2015

Find what you like. Cast a WIIIIDE net...
I like walking for some of the reasons you pointed out. I actually only sweat deeply a couple of times a week when I dance or hike. The rest of the time I'm in regular clothes walking. No shampoo, shower or costume changes necessary when I'm finished! And for resistance I do some body weight moves, usually in jammies. I just started yoga. No way would I have done that a few months ago! You live in a body. I'm convinced there's a way to move out there that can spark passion in every inhabitant of a human body. You just need to find what lights YOU up...

MostlyWater · December 2015

And, some of this lifestyle is maturity. Today I would have loved some cookies. Instead I had yogurt.

kshama2001 · December 2015

I may have been at my all time high weight when I started yoga 19 years ago. I wore baggy clothes and was in the back of the class. I took classes that were appropriate for my fitness level. It sounds like you push yourself too hard.

I developed body acceptance over the years and lost 30 pounds swimming in the pool at the Y in the most hideous suit ever sold by Walmart. But if you're not ready for that, that's fine - there are lots other activities you can do. Does walking aggravate your shins? Maybe start with walking and build up to running if you want. I personally have no desire to ever run again.

kshama2001 · December 2015

nytoco wrote: »

Wow, I really didn't expect this many responses when I posted this - thank you so much for all the advice and kind words.

I do try to eat healthy and I don't need many calories or much food at all, seeing as I'm quite short. But what bothers me about diet is that it's so, so easy to lose track of how many chips you ate, or to get an extra slice of cake and set yourself 400 calories behind, etc. It's just not very forgiving and losing weight just through eating healthier moves at a snail's pace for me, I have a pretty slow metabolism so I've found I have to combine eating less with exercising or it'll take the weight 10 times as long to come off.

As for what I can do to exercise - campus gym is a possibility, but even with music, I really hate the gym and associate it with negative things. I could always go just once a week or something so I don't feel like I'm forcing myself to go every day.
I have done Zumba and it's really fun, my school offers some group fitness classes and I plan to do Zumba once a week next semester and beginner level ballet twice a week. I could also add running once a week, and that would be 5 days of exercise, it's just that I have the tendency to talk myself out of it because of my low self-esteem. I think part of my issue is that I'm a perfectionist, so I tell myself that working out isn't even worth it if I know I'm going to be bad at it.

I think if I can overcome my negative mindsets (which result from over a decade of beating myself up over being unathletic, even when I was the skinniest kid in my class) I can achieve new levels of fitness and the weight loss will be an added bonus.

Prelogging helps with the first bolded. If I want chips, I make sure there is room in my calorie budget, weigh out no more than an ounce (and sometimes as little as 1/4 ounce), and put the bag away. "Away" is out of sight and out of reach unless I use a stool.

Re the second bolded - sounds like you tend to be an all-or-nothing type of person. Seek the middle path, grasshopper. Are there free Buddhist classes available?

Re the third bolded, while it is possible to overcome negative self talk on your own, because you have shown so much of it on this thread, therapy would be helpful to quickly teach you strategies to overcome this. They have therapy for free on campus, yes?

Capt_Apollo · December 2015

nytoco wrote: »

It's so counterproductive - shouldn't working out make me feel fit and proud? - but I just can't go on, and I end up crying in front of my mirror pinching at all my rolls.

I like dancing, but I feel so awkward in my body when I try. I like Pilates and yoga, but I feel fat and inflexible. I like swimming, but I feel ashamed of the way my body looks in a swimsuit.

Does anyone have advice on overcoming these hurdles and getting used to a routine?
(By the way - I'm a college student and I'm broke. I need something that doesn't cost money.)

Thanks.

i'll let you in on a secret: most people, from the soccer mom getting in a jog to the pro-athlete making a living working out, do not always like working out and often don't feel fit and proud in the middle of the workout. yes, at the end of a workout you can have a great sense of euphoria, and sometimes a person can have an amazing workout where everything is right and the playlist is perfect and you are just smashing it.

i think you might just be putting too much pressure on yourself at every workout. that *this* workout will be the one that gets you to love exercising, that will reshape your body, and it'll be effortless from now on.

another secret: it is never effortless. even the pro-athlete knows he's got to work harder because his team didn't make the championship last year

there are a million ways to exercise. i understand feeling fat and inflexible, and ashamed of what you look like in workout clothes, but i think i might have an answer for you: cycling. i didn't want to run when i first started either. i would quickly get out of breathe, and i could go far, and i felt people would laugh at me in workout clothes. so i dusted off my old mountain bike one day, thinking i'd go for a quick loop around the block. thirty minutes later i was home and in love. i was sweaty, but i wasn't out of breathe. i felt great. it didn't even feel like i had been working out because i was basically sight seeing in my neighborhood. and i was moving quick enough that no one could really see me and point and laugh.

so yeah, go get a bike.

jgnatca · December 2015

Lots of good stuff here I'll just add a few thoughts.

- read up on cognitive distortion and all or nothing thinking.
- I read recently that procrastination is an adult way of saying "I don't wanna." That really resonated with me, so I thought I'd save you thirty years of struggle and pay attention to your deep feelings why you don't want to exercise.
- The negative self talk is a huge bummer. You should be your biggest cheerleader. If you won't be gentle on yourself, who will?

OldAssDude · December 2015

nytoco wrote: »

Hi all. I'm a newbie to this whole fitness thing, but not really. I've started, and stopped, many a workout routine. The longest time I've ever stuck with one was 4 months, maybe, if I'm being generous to myself. I know I need to work out regularly because I'm now slightly overweight and I hate it so much, and every time I start a routine the pounds start falling off my body so clearly they aren't supposed to be there. But my problem is - and I know it's stupid - I really, really hate working out.

Here's a list of what I dislike the most about exercise, in no particular order:
• Makes you sweaty and out of breath
• You have to prepare to go do it, which takes extra time
• Takes a while to see results
• Often boring
• Can be painful (I like running but I get terrible shin splints, even when buying shoes made for my feet)

But the biggest thing for me is:
• I feel "trapped" in my body when I do it.
When I work out, I feel fatter, lazier, and less accomplished than I did before. I know it's stupid, but the fact that I'm out of shape makes me feel less motivated. Sometimes I have to stop a workout to sit down and cry because I feel so disgusted with myself, especially now that I'm at an all-time high body weight. It's so counterproductive - shouldn't working out make me feel fit and proud? - but I just can't go on, and I end up crying in front of my mirror pinching at all my rolls.

I like dancing, but I feel so awkward in my body when I try. I like Pilates and yoga, but I feel fat and inflexible. I like swimming, but I feel ashamed of the way my body looks in a swimsuit.

Does anyone have advice on overcoming these hurdles and getting used to a routine?
(By the way - I'm a college student and I'm broke. I need something that doesn't cost money.)

Thanks.

I was obese when I started. I weighed 225 lbs. I started out by walking a mile. After 1 mile at a slow pace (about 3mph) I had to lay down for an hour. I was drenched in sweat, my feet hurt, my shins hurt, my knees hurt, my hips hurt, my back hurt, my heart was pounding, and I could not catch my breadth. I hated it so much that I begged my wife to shoot me in the head.

But I kept doing it every day and sometimes two or three times a day. After a couple months I could walk 2 miles at a 3.5 mph pace, then 3 miles, and the pain got less and less. Then I got a bike and started doing that 2 or 3 times a week in addition to the walking. Then I got a kayak and started doing that 1 or 2 times a week in addition to the biking and walking. But mostly I just walked every day.

Now I power walk every day, and I can go over 7.5 miles at a 4.5 mph pace with no problem at all and keep my heart rate in zone 4 and 5 the entire walk. I lost 57 lbs. but gained 2 lbs. back over the holidays because I slacked off a little on the walking and ate more, but that was to be expected.

Did I hate it at first? ... hell yes.
Did I have to prepare for it? ... not really.
Did it take a while to see results? ... yes, but only a matter of months.
Is it boring? ... not really if you walk outside where other people are walking.
Is it painful? ... at first, but once you are conditioned it actually is the perfect amount of impact to maintain joint health.
Did I feel trapped in my body when I do it? ... at first I did because I thought that other people where thinking... oh... look at that big fat guy trying to exercise. But now I feel great because those same people are thinking... wow that big fat guy ain't fat anymore... I got to start walking.

If you want to feel fit and proud, you need to get over that hump.

My motto is... If you ain't huffing and puffing and sweating, you ain't doing it right...

I admire your honesty, and I guarantee if you get over that hump you will be crying tears of joy in front of the mirror because you look so good...

tomatoey · December 2015

nytoco wrote: »

it's just that I have the tendency to talk myself out of it because of my low self-esteem. I think part of my issue is that I'm a perfectionist, so I tell myself that working out isn't even worth it if I know I'm going to be bad at it.

So you don't want to risk failure. You're not where you "should" be, so there's no point. Ok - at least you recognize that that's not productive.

What about working to accept the idea that you are a beginner. No one can be great at everything the first time they try it.

Also, if you try something that's much beyond your current ability, that's going to be discouraging, of course.

Find a safe space, whatever that means to you, and a low-challenge activity, and allow yourself to make a few mistakes. Zumba sounds like a good idea. I'm sticking by walking over running. I'm not a fan of running, but if you're going to do it, at least work up to it. Literally: you have to walk before you can run. Especially if you're getting shin splints.

Good luck.

Advice for someone who hates exercise?

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