Should I feel bad?
incisron
Posts: 550 Member
My mom saw me eating four starbursts and said I'm going to be unhealthy and she fears ill go back to the way I ate before. She asked what happened to my diet. When I said I was just going to eat a little bit, she said I don't just eat a little bit of junk. I ate ten starbursts yesterday since the serving is 8 and I had a couple more calories. I have been trying to stick to my calories, but I did mess up badly on Christmas day, even though we don't even celebrate it, and the day before because of bad choices and emotions. I'm not sure how my mom knew that, or if she knew.
I was planning to just eat a little bit, but should I stop eating the candy?
I was planning to just eat a little bit, but should I stop eating the candy?
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The day before Christmas I got hungry and used most of my calories to eat a huge bunch of chips instead of waiting for dinner. The scale went up from sodium and I spent that day drinking tons of water, then got upset the next day because my weight just went up after the water and I didn't pee it all off, then I tried to guess how many calories were in a dinner mom made. I couldn't, so then I gave up and used it as an excuse to eat alot. I'm ashamed about being stupid. I bought some chicken and fruit yesterday to make myself. I used to try not to eat junk at all, except on weekly "cheat days." I realized "cheats" were a bad idea and not having any junk the rest of the time was making it hard, so I started fitting some junk into my calories and then I started turning too many calories into junk. That was recent. I don't want to do that anymore, and want to just eat a little, but feel like I'm doing badly regardless.0
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How old are you OP?0
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Draw a line under any bad eating at Christmas. Life happens.
Have you tried planning your meals in advance? I plan three meals and then the calories that are left (usually about 200 ish) can be used on "junk". I pre log too. I'm no expert, I've been trying to lose for a year and go up and down. I'm only 7pounds down but I class this as part of the journey rather than giving up. I'm still trying to find what works for me long term and it is tough. I believe I can get there though.0 -
19. Sorry if I seem whiny.0
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lilypond45 wrote: »Draw a line under any bad eating at Christmas. Life happens.
Have you tried planning your meals in advance? I plan three meals and then the calories that are left (usually about 200 ish) can be used on "junk". I pre log too. I'm no expert, I've been trying to lose for a year and go up and down. I'm only 7pounds down but I class this as part of the journey rather than giving up. I'm still trying to find what works for me long term and it is tough. I believe I can get there though.
Yeah, I plan my meals and save them in my email app. I planned out some fruit, a turkey hot dog, a serving of Pringles and candy and a curried chicken recipe i found. For the past couple weeks before my Xmas failure I didn't stick to my plans and used too many calories on junk.0 -
Eating large amounts of calories at Christmas time is normal. Doing so every once in a while will not hurt. Just make sure you go back to eating normally after the holiday. I know for a fact I ate ~3000 calories on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The 26th and 27th I went back to eating less that 2000 calories a day.0
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I messed up four days in a row.... chocolate, potato chips, wine, you name it, I consumed it in non-recommended quantities. Did I try walking any of it off? Nah... mostly binge-watched TV for the long weekend. I have no idea what my calorie totals were; I wrote off those four days to "get it out of my system", and now I'm back on track this morning. Stuff happens. You wouldn't be human if you were perfect all the time. I have four days off this week too, but I no longer feel like bumming around and eating too much; I'm going to be fine and so will you. Keep working at it!-1
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Thanks every1.0
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I just feel kind of bad for eating starbursts. I thought I was doing ok but I'm not so sure anymore.0
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No. I ate three a while ago; yesterday I had ten. I feel bad because mom saw me eating candy and didn't approve and she might think I just sit and stuff junk into my face all day. She thinks I'm not trying to watch my food anymore. The bad part is I DID stuff junk into my face for a couple weeks before the Xmas problem, spending alot of my 1300 something calories on junk.0
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No. I ate three a while ago; yesterday I had ten. I feel bad because mom saw me eating candy and didn't approve and she might think I just sit and stuff junk into my face all day. She thinks I'm not trying to watch my food anymore. The bad part is I DID stuff junk into my face for a couple weeks before the Xmas problem, spending alot of my 1300 something calories on junk.
I ate 1/4lb+ of reeses cups last week in one sitting...it's really hard to find that in a measurement on that site. So don't feel bad, and don't let others make you feel bad. Your mom isn't the one you have to answer to (weight loss wise...don't know what the living situation is), you only have to answer to yourself.
Log the starbusts and move on. If they are a "tigger food" (like the pb cups are for me) get them out of your house asap so the temptation is gone.0 -
Mmmmm, sounds kind of gr8. I stopped eating pb cups for months because I stuck a bag in the fridge for a week after a "cheat day" to get them out next "cheat day" and they were hard with gritty peanut butter and I ended up vomiting. Reeses is starting to sound good now, though.No. I ate three a while ago; yesterday I had ten. I feel bad because mom saw me eating candy and didn't approve and she might think I just sit and stuff junk into my face all day. She thinks I'm not trying to watch my food anymore. The bad part is I DID stuff junk into my face for a couple weeks before the Xmas problem, spending alot of my 1300 something calories on junk.
I ate 1/4lb+ of reeses cups last week in one sitting...it's really hard to find that in a measurement on that site. So don't feel bad, and don't let others make you feel bad. Your mom isn't the one you have to answer to (weight loss wise...don't know what the living situation is), you only have to answer to yourself.
Log the starbusts and move on. If they are a "tigger food" (like the pb cups are for me) get them out of your house asap so the temptation is gone.
Yeah, they're not a trigger food, but my stupidity is one.
I wish id never told mom about watching what I eat. I didn't think of it as a "diet," but I guess she does.
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I sound so whiny. Thanks for advising and making me feel better, every1.
On the bright side, it looks like the water weight is coming off fast this morning. I don't want to eat sodium like that anymore.0 -
My mom didn't understand at first either. She used to make all kinds of comments when she caught me eating things she didn't believe belonged on a diet menu. If you let that get to you, it's going to affect your eating. What I did was say "yes mom I understand what you are saying, but the diet I'm on allows me to eat sweets and such in small portions". That wasn't a good enough answer for her, but time was the best answer. I kept getting thinner and healthier despite the kinds of foods I ate.
Just give it time and don't let it affect you. When she sees you are getting healthier she will stop the unnecessary comments, or at least they will get less intense like my mom's did. Instead of dragging an argument she now rarely comments, and when she does it's something like "You're not doing it right in my opinion, but do whatever you want" and it ends there.0 -
don't let people judge you based on what you eat. A starburst is going to be carbs, and mostly nutritionally devoid, but who cares if you get your nutritional needs and these are just calories you have to spare. People judge what you eat based on a lack of knowledge, all the while thinking they know that a certain food will make you fat (which it won't). I eat "junk" food every day, and I don't care one bit. If anyone got on my case and told me I wasn't going to lose weight eating something like that I'd shove my 45lb weightloss and food log in their face and ask me to tell me that I didn't lose weight eating it before.
Also, even if you have a calorie goal of 1300, having days you go over is not a big deal. For starters, if you only go over by a few hundred calories you are probably eating at maintenance (depends on your set rate of lose). Secondly, it is good to have breaks once in a while. I intentionally ate at maintenance on Christmas, Thanksgiving, and other vacations (didn't sweat it if I went over that too) because the difference in food quantities between losing weight and not losing weight is enough for me to really feel like I ate everything I wanted. However, I do try to keep my days over intentional so that I remain in control.0 -
Thanks amused. Guess I shouldn't let it bother me.amusedmonkey wrote: »My mom didn't understand at first either. She used to make all kinds of comments when she caught me eating things she didn't believe belonged on a diet menu. If you let that get to you, it's going to affect your eating. What I did was say "yes mom I understand what you are saying, but the diet I'm on allows me to eat sweets and such in small portions". That wasn't a good enough answer for her, but time was the best answer. I kept getting thinner and healthier despite the kinds of foods I ate.
Just give it time and don't let it affect you. When she sees you are getting healthier she will stop the unnecessary comments, or at least they will get less intense like my mom's did. Instead of dragging an argument she now rarely comments, and when she does it's something like "You're not doing it right in my opinion, but do whatever you want" and it ends there.
My family doesn't eat healthy at all. They had fried chicken last night and mom startled me by getting sick in the middle of the night after eating two pieces of cake. I guess that's why she says she doesn't want me to have those same health problems,as both my parents are overweight. Still it did make me feel bad that I was trying and was considered unhealthy for eating starbursts. But I'm over it, I guess. Thanks, every1.
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nordlead2005 wrote: »don't let people judge you based on what you eat. A starburst is going to be carbs, and mostly nutritionally devoid, but who cares if you get your nutritional needs and these are just calories you have to spare. People judge what you eat based on a lack of knowledge, all the while thinking they know that a certain food will make you fat (which it won't). I eat "junk" food every day, and I don't care one bit. If anyone got on my case and told me I wasn't going to lose weight eating something like that I'd shove my 45lb weightloss and food log in their face and ask me to tell me that I didn't lose weight eating it before.
Also, even if you have a calorie goal of 1300, having days you go over is not a big deal. For starters, if you only go over by a few hundred calories you are probably eating at maintenance (depends on your set rate of lose). Secondly, it is good to have breaks once in a while. I intentionally ate at maintenance on Christmas, Thanksgiving, and other vacations (didn't sweat it if I went over that too) because the difference in food quantities between losing weight and not losing weight is enough for me to really feel like I ate everything I wanted. However, I do try to keep my days over intentional so that I remain in control.
thanks.
Anything good tasting?0 -
I think this is an important question. Are you able to eat just a few or is it a gateway to you binging? For some strange reason I eat more gummy bears now than I ever did in my life. However, they all fit within my calorie budget.
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Your an adult so it really doesn't matter what your mom thinks about eating starburst candy.
If you find yourself going off track often, maybe try to prelog your day. Plan out a healthy well balanced day and log it, include a treat in it. Maybe you'll find it easier to stick to if its already planned out.0 -
Thanks, every1.
Starbursts aren't a trigger food, but my stupidity was one. I heard there's a low carb version I can have with any treat.0 -
Just remember that one "unhealthy" food doesn't negate the healthy food that you are eating. It's not like you're eating healthy and that one choice makes your entire diet unhealthy. Once you hit your nutrition goals, you don't get extra credit for going over them.0
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You know what concerns me most, my dear? How often you describe yourself as "whiny" or "stupid." If your family has got eating issues, and you're only 19 but already taking responsibility for changing that in yourself, then you're neither whiny nor stupid. You're getting some puzzling and hurtful messages from people who are incredibly important to you, so you're getting a reality check from adults outside your home. That's a very good idea. It's part of growing up. I'm sure your mom means well when she wants to protect you from her own mistakes, but sometimes it's easier for people to focus on their own mistakes in others, and it's not always that comfortable or helpful for the "others"! It's important to remember that she's really talking to herself, and that you're in charge of your own behavior. You might try reassuring her that your results are looking good and thanking her warmly for her concern, but otherwise kind of letting what she says roll off your back. I know that's easier said than done, especially at 19, but you'll have to learn to do it eventually--everyone does--or else their families would make them crazy forever. Don't worry, one day you'll probably do the same to your kids without meaning to.0
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You, and everyone in your life needs to know that a 'diet' doesn't mean you can't ever go overboard and eat high sugary sweets. I think most people on this sight slip up on a fairly regular basis, and go to town on a treat once in awhile.
Mom maybe needs to be told that you know what you are doing, and that you deserve a treat now and then. Unless of course you need someone giving you the evil eye to keep you accountable.0 -
One small hill doesn't determine that you should give up. People will always talk about the things you do but you do what you believe is whats best for you. I ate so much over the weekend. I gained 4 lbs and I'm pretty sure that is because of my sodium intake but hey I didn't let that get to me because I'm jumping right back on this bandwagon and going at it again. Key-Don't give up because you went over a hill you didn't like. Just keep going.0
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No. I ate three a while ago; yesterday I had ten. I feel bad because mom saw me eating candy and didn't approve and she might think I just sit and stuff junk into my face all day. She thinks I'm not trying to watch my food anymore. The bad part is I DID stuff junk into my face for a couple weeks before the Xmas problem, spending alot of my 1300 something calories on junk.
Stop caring what your mum thinks0 -
Hugs thanks every1. I know mom didn't mean anything bad by it and didnt want me to make her mistakes but it did make me feel a bit bad. I do feel better now. You all are nice
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Lol I was saying a low carb version of stupid. I was joking. But I'm done with self disparaging stuff, I was just nervous.0
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