Problem with alcohol
jaycich
Posts: 44 Member
Hi everyone,
I made this profile a little over a year ago with intents to lose 15-20 lbs. Well, life happened. I won't get into details, not because it's privite, (it's just too long of a story) but rather than lose belly fat, I got used to drinking a 6 pack a day, often with added shots of liquor and I think it's taken a toll on me, physically and mentally. I'm having a hard time focusing and getting motivated, not just for losing weight, but for doing everything. I sleep until 11 everyday, I procrastinate, I have a hard time reading and writing anything longer than 2 paragraphs and I keep drinking everyday mainly out of boredom. I don't talk to my friends anymore (they never call for that matter) I feel a little spaced out when I'm out in public. I've gotten so light complected since I don't go outdoors much. I've taken up a very expensive hobby (fire arms) I have more than I need, I've spent a lot on guns, ammo and trips to the shooting range.
I'm drinking a beer as I write this. How do I shake this habit?
I made this profile a little over a year ago with intents to lose 15-20 lbs. Well, life happened. I won't get into details, not because it's privite, (it's just too long of a story) but rather than lose belly fat, I got used to drinking a 6 pack a day, often with added shots of liquor and I think it's taken a toll on me, physically and mentally. I'm having a hard time focusing and getting motivated, not just for losing weight, but for doing everything. I sleep until 11 everyday, I procrastinate, I have a hard time reading and writing anything longer than 2 paragraphs and I keep drinking everyday mainly out of boredom. I don't talk to my friends anymore (they never call for that matter) I feel a little spaced out when I'm out in public. I've gotten so light complected since I don't go outdoors much. I've taken up a very expensive hobby (fire arms) I have more than I need, I've spent a lot on guns, ammo and trips to the shooting range.
I'm drinking a beer as I write this. How do I shake this habit?
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Replies
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Talk to a professional, now. Overcoming a drinking problem is difficult. I just completed 30 days sober. The guns frighten me. Please don't use then while drinking. I wish you luck.0
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Well I drank only 2 yesterday and woke up at 9 this morning. I think this is a start. I'm going to see if I can sell some of my firearms.0
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talk to a professional. Don't go near a shooting range or anywhere else with a firearm with alcohol in your bloodstream. Find a local AA group and TALK to them.
Focus on the alcohol, the reasons you drink, and work on getting into a regular routine. See your doctor for referrals if need be.0 -
There are many ways to get help, the first thing is wanting to change the habit...and you've realized that!0
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call up one of your friends, people get busy and I suspect they would like to hear from you.0
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I had written much more but it seems that it didn't post. Feel free to msg me if you want. You can turn things around!!
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You definitely have a drinking problem. Schedule a doctor's appointment and start looking into resources in your area for alcoholism. Remember that this won't change unless you really WANT to change. Good luck!0
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I'm an addict myself in recovery. Though I didn't have a drinking problem I had a drug problem. I am now at a methadone clinic with about 7 months clean. You can turn things around if you really want to trust me. It's definitely not easy but it's worth it. I wish you the very best of luck.0
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I wanna thank everyone for the replies, you gals are so kind. Here we go, I'm on a mission! I'll keep updating this thread.0
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You sound similar to my husband, except he eats instead of drinking. Getting motivated is tough for anyone-- so it's important to take it one day at a time.0
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I would certainly recommend substance abuse counseling, if you feel like rather than you being in control of your drinking it is the other way around - because if you can't stop now, it's not likely to get any easier. There are usually both individual and group counseling opportunities, and it can be a good way to create a network of other people struggling with the same difficulties. Everyone needs help sometimes, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with reaching out.
That being said, if you are able to continue cutting back and controlling your drinking on your own like you had mentioned, I'd really recommend that you find other ways to stay busy and other things that you enjoy. Having no structure and no routine in your day is going to make it that much harder to resist drinking, whether out of boredom, loneliness, what have you. I know that I sometimes teeter on the edge of alcoholism, and have gone through periods of heavy drinking every single day for lengthy periods; what helped me ultimately control this tendency was signing up for a self-defens/fitness class that meets in the evening. I love the class, I find it challenging, and I find punching and kicking and throttling the bejesus out of people to be extremely cathartic. But most importantly, I can't drink beforehand for obvious reasons and the class runs late enough that by the time I've come home, showered, and eaten dinner I'm too tired to feel like mixing a drink.
For me it was all about structuring my day, and my life, to reduce the opportunities and temptation to drink. I will still indulge in weekends, but I now feel entirely in control.0 -
CaffeinatedConfectionist wrote: »I would certainly recommend substance abuse counseling, if you feel like rather than you being in control of your drinking it is the other way around - because if you can't stop now, it's not likely to get any easier. There are usually both individual and group counseling opportunities, and it can be a good way to create a network of other people struggling with the same difficulties. Everyone needs help sometimes, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with reaching out.
That being said, if you are able to continue cutting back and controlling your drinking on your own like you had mentioned, I'd really recommend that you find other ways to stay busy and other things that you enjoy. Having no structure and no routine in your day is going to make it that much harder to resist drinking, whether out of boredom, loneliness, what have you. I know that I sometimes teeter on the edge of alcoholism, and have gone through periods of heavy drinking every single day for lengthy periods; what helped me ultimately control this tendency was signing up for a self-defens/fitness class that meets in the evening. I love the class, I find it challenging, and I find punching and kicking and throttling the bejesus out of people to be extremely cathartic. But most importantly, I can't drink beforehand for obvious reasons and the class runs late enough that by the time I've come home, showered, and eaten dinner I'm too tired to feel like mixing a drink.
For me it was all about structuring my day, and my life, to reduce the opportunities and temptation to drink. I will still indulge in weekends, but I now feel entirely in control.
On man I haven't done MMA since 2007. That's something I could get back into, although I was looking into mountain biking. I need to at least get out to the track, I haven't exercised since September.0 -
Alcohol is a major depressant, too. Your lack of motivation might be an underlying bout of depression, which is made infinitely worse with drinking. I'd definitely start with your doctor. Depending on how much you're drinking every day, you might need medical assistance. My boyfriend dried out in the hospital. They watched him for seizures, sucicidal ideation, etc. he didn't always drink a lot, but he drank a fair amount every day (ok, probably a lot by most standards). He was super nauseated and had the shakes/hot flashes. So once he had dried out, it was a lot easier to eat with the other issues around it.
I have a really hard time losing weight when I'm drinking. So that's another reason to consider drinking less. Even if you get down to 1 beer a day, which is reasonable.0 -
CaffeinatedConfectionist wrote: »I would certainly recommend substance abuse counseling, if you feel like rather than you being in control of your drinking it is the other way around - because if you can't stop now, it's not likely to get any easier. There are usually both individual and group counseling opportunities, and it can be a good way to create a network of other people struggling with the same difficulties. Everyone needs help sometimes, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with reaching out.
That being said, if you are able to continue cutting back and controlling your drinking on your own like you had mentioned, I'd really recommend that you find other ways to stay busy and other things that you enjoy. Having no structure and no routine in your day is going to make it that much harder to resist drinking, whether out of boredom, loneliness, what have you. I know that I sometimes teeter on the edge of alcoholism, and have gone through periods of heavy drinking every single day for lengthy periods; what helped me ultimately control this tendency was signing up for a self-defens/fitness class that meets in the evening. I love the class, I find it challenging, and I find punching and kicking and throttling the bejesus out of people to be extremely cathartic. But most importantly, I can't drink beforehand for obvious reasons and the class runs late enough that by the time I've come home, showered, and eaten dinner I'm too tired to feel like mixing a drink.
For me it was all about structuring my day, and my life, to reduce the opportunities and temptation to drink. I will still indulge in weekends, but I now feel entirely in control.
On man I haven't done MMA since 2007. That's something I could get back into, although I was looking into mountain biking. I need to at least get out to the track, I haven't exercised since September.
Seriously, starting Krav maga was the best thing I ever did to limit my drinking. It's almost like being an entirely different person. But anything, mountain biking, MMA, running, lifting, swimming... non-exercise things like joining meetups, reconnecting with friends, finding someplace to volunteer, whatever - as long as it helps you find a routine and something worth spending your time on and staying sober for, it's bound to be worth doing.0 -
call up one of your friends, people get busy and I suspect they would like to hear from you.
IDK, 2 years ago, I lost my job, at the time I had a fancy car and an apartment. In order to save money and not get into the habit of being out while unemployed, I stopped going out. I was just doing a lot of reading and cooking. Well, that unemployment lasted a lot longer than I thought and I ended up selling my car and breaking my lease. This was about a year into it. My old man passed away back in August. When that happen happened my friends called me and met up with me. Well I started to exercise and started feeling good. I started to hit them up again, but every time it was like they had something going on. I tried for 3 weekends in row, like hey let's do something, they say yeah and then wouldn't return my calls. I don't think they were purposely avoiding me, what it is, is that the crew broke up and they each have a set of their own friends who they normally hang with now.0 -
Katiebear_81 wrote: »Alcohol is a major depressant, too. Your lack of motivation might be an underlying bout of depression, which is made infinitely worse with drinking. I'd definitely start with your doctor. Depending on how much you're drinking every day, you might need medical assistance. My boyfriend dried out in the hospital. They watched him for seizures, sucicidal ideation, etc. he didn't always drink a lot, but he drank a fair amount every day (ok, probably a lot by most standards). He was super nauseated and had the shakes/hot flashes. So once he had dried out, it was a lot easier to eat with the other issues around it.
I have a really hard time losing weight when I'm drinking. So that's another reason to consider drinking less. Even if you get down to 1 beer a day, which is reasonable.
Yeah that seem to be the common problem from most of what I've read. However I'm not especially depressed, my drinking comes from my love for craft beer and sports. It's like anytime there's a game I pick up some beer to drink while I watch the game. I used to watch sports sober during the week, but got used to drinking.0 -
Alright guys, I had 0 drinks last and I woke up at 6 this morning. I sold one of my fire for just a pinch less than I bought it for. I'm going to make a listing and see if I can get rid of another one.
The bad news is I ate pizza last night and this morning. Lol0 -
It's a slippery slope, but at least talk to a group or professional and figure out what is going on. I abused alcohol for years, but would stop myself at times to prove I could shake it. Then I'd go right back to drinking. I've had a decent bit of tragedy in my family and I think it was a self medicating thing, but somehow in my mind I justified it and didn't deal with it since I still made it to work and paid my bills. So being that I was a responsible alcohol abuser made it ok in my mind somehow.
In a clinical sense, I'm not an alcoholic, and have had plenty in recovery set me straight on the differences. A few times I had myself convinced that I was, but would quit drinking for a few weeks to prove to myself otherwise.
For me, I more or less quit all drinking when my daughter was born. I just didn't want it in my life. Now we have a drink or a few socially, but very rarely.
Though I was never abusive or anything like that, I'm lucky my wife put up with my crap through my drinking years. Really lucky. And I'm sure there are other things I screwed up beyond my relationship with her during that time. If I could just have the beer money back I'd be a lot closer to retirement, and the list grows easily from there.0 -
Lots of respectable honesty here, props to all of you for seeing and wanting (and some accomplishing) these changes.
I have a tendency to drink too much too but with an autoimmune disorder that flares with alcohol use, it has started to set me straight. Pretty, smooth, healthy skin > tasty wine. Sometimes, I find it's the physical habit of drinking something that isn't coffee or water so I try to replace the actual drink - tea, juice, diet soda, something that is 'different' but not liquor.
Also agreed on other habits. Soccer is my 'drug of choice' the only downside is the occasional team beer post game, but I'll offer to drive and it keeps me accountable.
If you feel the want to have a craft beer here or there, don't deprive yourself but moderate yourself. Instead of guzzling it and reaching for another, perhaps start a craft beer journal/blog where you sip the beer and write about it. My issue was always that I don't want to stop after the first glass of wine so I finish the bottle. Now, although it's more expensive, I'll buy those single serve glasses. It helps with moderation (and calories!)
Great luck on your journey. As others have mentioned, the fact that you WANT to fix it, is a huge step in the right direction.0 -
talking to a professional or finding an AA group or other group for people who want to stop drinking can help greatly
They say that alcohol is but a symptom...get to the root of the issues-either medical or emotional or both
also, getting out and getting busy can help you feel better. make new friends. take up new hobbies. maybe a cooking class?0 -
Lots of respectable honesty here, props to all of you for seeing and wanting (and some accomplishing) these changes.
I have a tendency to drink too much too but with an autoimmune disorder that flares with alcohol use, it has started to set me straight. Pretty, smooth, healthy skin > tasty wine. Sometimes, I find it's the physical habit of drinking something that isn't coffee or water so I try to replace the actual drink - tea, juice, diet soda, something that is 'different' but not liquor.
Also agreed on other habits. Soccer is my 'drug of choice' the only downside is the occasional team beer post game, but I'll offer to drive and it keeps me accountable.
If you feel the want to have a craft beer here or there, don't deprive yourself but moderate yourself. Instead of guzzling it and reaching for another, perhaps start a craft beer journal/blog where you sip the beer and write about it. My issue was always that I don't want to stop after the first glass of wine so I finish the bottle. Now, although it's more expensive, I'll buy those single serve glasses. It helps with moderation (and calories!)
Great luck on your journey. As others have mentioned, the fact that you WANT to fix it, is a huge step in the right direction.
Yeah I understand a beer here and there is fine, but before I can do that, I need to go cold turkey for a few months and least get my tolerance back down. I used to drink 4 and didn't need anymore, now it's more like 8.0 -
Absolutely seek professional help and go to an AA meeting. They are everywhere. Seriously, all day everyday there is a meeting. Even if you aren't convinced you need to go, I am. If it's not right for you, then do something different, but still seek help. Hoping the best for you my friend. It starts with you tho. Only you can make yourself get help. We can't do it for you.0
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It looks like you have taken the first steps, acknowledgement. I am much older now, and frankly can't keep up with the younger guys, but you will get to a point where you don't want to feel like crap anymore. You'll find that you enjoy being sober and clean headed. Things taste better and more interesting in my opinion.
I do wish you the best of luck, purpose driven life man, purpose driven life!0 -
If AA isn't your thing, there's a great site to help with alcohol abstinence: https://www.hellosundaymorning.org It's free. You sign up for a self-governed period of time to quit or reduce your alcohol consumption. You can set other goals if you like, or join in others' promises to themselves. It's a great community of people who have been where you are, where ever that is. It's nothing but supportive. Please consider it. Just go take a look. It helped me immensely!0
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TechOutside wrote: »It looks like you have taken the first steps, acknowledgement. I am much older now, and frankly can't keep up with the younger guys, but you will get to a point where you don't want to feel like crap anymore. You'll find that you enjoy being sober and clean headed. Things taste better and more interesting in my opinion.
I do wish you the best of luck, purpose driven life man, purpose driven life!
Thank you.0 -
If AA isn't your thing, there's a great site to help with alcohol abstinence: https://www.hellosundaymorning.org It's free. You sign up for a self-governed period of time to quit or reduce your alcohol consumption. You can set other goals if you like, or join in others' promises to themselves. It's a great community of people who have been where you are, where ever that is. It's nothing but supportive. Please consider it. Just go take a look. It helped me immensely!
I think AA is a bit excessive. I'll definitely check out that site. Thank you very much0 -
I also recommend Hellosundaymorning.org It has helped me to kick my nightly wine for about 50 plus days now and I am pretty excited about that Very supportive people on there. 0
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I tried to keep drinking in moderation but couldn't get my exercise or weight loss on track. I stopped drinking for a month, and now just drink on "special occasions". Both my parents were alcoholics so I was nervous, but have managed moderation (with no set schedule, like drinking on just the weekends). I also rarely drink my favorite- wine. It's easy for me to have a single ounce of scotch, but not just one glass of wine.0
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Well it's good to see that you acknowledge a problem exists, now is about changing your habits. If you're bored, find something to occupy your time! I saw you mentioned mountain biking as a hobby, and I see a very cute little kitten in your profile pic, why not see if you can volunteer at an animal shelter? When I lived in Montana, I made friends by joining roller derby, so a new group hobby might open up your social life a bit. But most importantly - if you have the resources to seek professional substance abuse help, try it out. It might also help to find a friend to be sober with. One of my friends quit drinking for the month and we hung out on a Friday night, got dinner and went to a museum and neither of us had any booze and we still had a good time! Her not drinking made me want to abstain as well.0
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boegeholda wrote: »Well it's good to see that you acknowledge a problem exists, now is about changing your habits. If you're bored, find something to occupy your time! I saw you mentioned mountain biking as a hobby, and I see a very cute little kitten in your profile pic, why not see if you can volunteer at an animal shelter? When I lived in Montana, I made friends by joining roller derby, so a new group hobby might open up your social life a bit. But most importantly - if you have the resources to seek professional substance abuse help, try it out. It might also help to find a friend to be sober with. One of my friends quit drinking for the month and we hung out on a Friday night, got dinner and went to a museum and neither of us had any booze and we still had a good time! Her not drinking made me want to abstain as well.
I tried to volunteer, but I was hired at a job right after the orientation so I was never able to show up. It's a far out of the way, about an hour in traffic so I couldn't make it after work. I found that kitten outside under my car, she was just 6 weeks old and would've been by herself even after I got off work so the volunteer thing didn't work out. My friends........ Let's say I call or text one of my friends now, I'll get a call back at 8:30 saying he was with his girl or working on his car. Another friend will say he's meeting some of work buddies for drinks, another going to the gym then home. I have to get my own the thing going like I had in the past.0
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