Weight loss comments

Zenberry2015

As I have been reading through different threads, I have noticed that some people get really pissed when other people comment on their weight loss and others get pissed when they don't comment.

If you have lost noticeable amounts of weight, which side of this do you fall on? Should people comment or not?

Ninkyou

I don't care either way.

Zenberry2015

To clarify - I mean people like your coworkers, friends, etc. not people on the forums.

FunSizedKJ

For me, it's what the comment is! I've shown people "before" pictures and they say something like, "wow you look great.. I never realized how fat/big/large/etc you were before". To me that's rude. But, I love the comments that are encouraging and from a good place

Ninkyou

Still don't care.

Mycophilia

I don't really care either.

patesq

I waited for that first comment because I wanted to know the loss was visible. I wasn't seeing any loss so it made it seem more real when others could see it. I still (84 lbs of loss out of 112 I hope to lose) really don't see a loss.

100df

I prefer no one to mention it. When someone does say something I try to redirect the conversation as swiftly as possible.

zyxst

I don't like them because it puts me in the center of attention.

Triplestep

100df wrote: »

I prefer no one to mention it. When someone does say something I try to redirect the conversation as swiftly as possible.

Me, too. I can't really put my finger on why, but I dread people mentioning it. It's probably because I feel a lot of shame over how unfit I had become. I'm happy to be losing the weight, but I don't want it to be a topic of discussion at work (or really anywhere.)

tracie_minus100

They don't bother me. I'm awkward when I'm complimented though.

dutchandkiwi

It totally depends on who, how and what. I don't mind positive comments much as that is a case of yes I have lost weight thanks and get on in the conversation.
The people that tell me to stop because I am too skinny (BMI still in overweight) annoy the bejeezus out of me. Specifically if they try to convince my husband that he should stop me. Totally passive aggressive the latter

stormyview

Triplestep wrote: »

100df wrote: »

I prefer no one to mention it. When someone does say something I try to redirect the conversation as swiftly as possible.

Me, too. I can't really put my finger on why, but I dread people mentioning it. It's probably because I feel a lot of shame over how unfit I had become. I'm happy to be losing the weight, but I don't want it to be a topic of discussion at work (or really anywhere.)

This is me. I don't like how I let myself go, so I don't want to have it mentioned. Lucky for me, I live in a very reserved area, and the only people who've ever mentioned it are either from a vastly different culture or are very close friends with whom I'd discussed it.

blossomingbutterfly

I despise when people do because it's always in a huge public setting and it draws so much attention to me and I HATE attention so much. I'm a very private and quiet person. It's awful to me. If I was an outgoing person and an open person, I'd probably not mind at all.

tottie_07

I will happily take the comment as a compliment... and embrace it. And if none is given, that's fine too.

PandoraGreen721

The compliments are nice to hear if given..and I appreciate them..but if none are given/nothing is said it doesn't affect me. I did this for me..anything else is just bonus.

upoffthemat

pandora721 wrote: »

The compliments are nice to hear if given..and I appreciate them..but if none are given/nothing is said it doesn't affect me. I did this for me..anything else is just bonus.

I agree with this

Don't mind the comments one way or the other. Nice to have it noticed, but this is about me and not them. This time around I couldn't care less what anyone else says. I carry my own food, my own water, I pace to get exercise if I want. I don't volunteer that I am losing weight, I don't deny I am.

RoseTheWarrior

I appreciate the comments.

I have noticed that people who are in a good weight range are the ones to mention it and tell me how good I look. Those who have weight problems themselves never say a word, unless it's something like "you make me feel like a loser" (actually had a co-worker say that). My mom never says anything about my weight loss even though I've lost almost 50 lbs - but she is very overweight and eats horribly.

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn

Back in the day, I hated the attention and comments and they would derail me. Every time. This time around, I was armed and ready - and it seemed like they never came! Finally, 100# down and people began to comment. I thanked them and moved on.

Weirdly, now 165# down, EVERYONE comments. Worse yet, I've gotten four "omg, I didn't recognize you"s in the past 2 weeks. Comments I can handle, compliments are great, but the inevitable "how much have you lost" really, really plays in my head. I still, obviously, have more to lose (about 60-70#). I abhor the idea of people doing the math and realizing I was over 400#. I feel like lying and saying 65#, but I just blow past the answer with "a lot." How would you answer that?

seltzermint555

I've lost well over 100 lb and I fall somewhere in the middle on this. I am not super public about my weight loss, for example I was NEVER that person who posts their workouts, goals, and pounds lost on social media (aside from this site obviously). I don't like it when people say things like "I bet you feel so much better now!" because it implies that I felt terrible before, and that's simply untrue (FOR ME...I know others feel differently based on their own experiences). I also get a little annoyed when people go on about it too much and too often. My neighbor for example, she says things that seem complimentary but go too far to sound a bit condescending to me "Oh my gosh look at your long skinny legs in those jeans, you look fabulous!" I like that sort of comment from my best friends but from my neighbor I barely know, it's obnoxious.

But...for the most part, I appreciate the comments & compliments. Most of the people I know simply say "You look great!" if anything, and I don't know how I could possibly find offense in that! When I run into people from my past, for example those who knew me in my teens or twenties, they usually do have a very shocked reaction (since I was 60-70 lb heavier even as a teenager) but it's generally positive. I must admit that I really like it when people I have only "seen" online (facebook) see me irl and comment "WHOA I didn't realize how thin you were now!" because in my observation a lot of women my age (30s-40s) share older or ultra flattering pics of themselves online and then don't get that kind of reaction in person. haha (sounds a bit arrogant maybe but I love that honestly)

tkphotogirl

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn wrote: »

Back in the day, I hated the attention and comments and they would derail me. Every time. This time around, I was armed and ready - and it seemed like they never came! Finally, 100# down and people began to comment. I thanked them and moved on.

Weirdly, now 165# down, EVERYONE comments. Worse yet, I've gotten four "omg, I didn't recognize you"s in the past 2 weeks. Comments I can handle, compliments are great, but the inevitable "how much have you lost" really, really plays in my head. I still, obviously, have more to lose (about 60-70#). I abhor the idea of people doing the math and realizing I was over 400#. I feel like lying and saying 65#, but I just blow past the answer with "a lot." How would you answer that?

"I have no idea, I never used to weigh myself"

amusedmonkey

I don't mind either. If someone doesn't comment, I don't really care. I'm not doing this for the comments. If someone comments I just thank them, regardless of the comment. I generally tend to not over-analyze what people say because they most likely did not mean it in a bad way and just happen to have a "foot in mouth" issue.

Maybe it's just me, because I have a very high offense threshold and it takes more than most people are capable of to offend me.

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn

tkphotogirl wrote: »

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn wrote: »

Back in the day, I hated the attention and comments and they would derail me. Every time. This time around, I was armed and ready - and it seemed like they never came! Finally, 100# down and people began to comment. I thanked them and moved on.

Weirdly, now 165# down, EVERYONE comments. Worse yet, I've gotten four "omg, I didn't recognize you"s in the past 2 weeks. Comments I can handle, compliments are great, but the inevitable "how much have you lost" really, really plays in my head. I still, obviously, have more to lose (about 60-70#). I abhor the idea of people doing the math and realizing I was over 400#. I feel like lying and saying 65#, but I just blow past the answer with "a lot." How would you answer that?

"I have no idea, I never used to weigh myself"

Great answer!!

Triplestep

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn wrote: »

I feel like lying and saying 65#, but I just blow past the answer with "a lot." How would you answer that?

I tell people that I've lost some, but mostly "rearranged" it with resistance training. You can always tell them you don't know exactly how much you've lost - that you stopped weighing yourself at 50# lost (or whatever number you pick.). Not exactly true, but it subtly tells people not to be concerned with the exact number because you're not.

Mavrick_RN

MimiOfTheLusciousLawn wrote: »

Back in the day, I hated the attention and comments and they would derail me. Every time. This time around, I was armed and ready - and it seemed like they never came! Finally, 100# down and people began to comment. I thanked them and moved on.

Weirdly, now 165# down, EVERYONE comments. Worse yet, I've gotten four "omg, I didn't recognize you"s in the past 2 weeks. Comments I can handle, compliments are great, but the inevitable "how much have you lost" really, really plays in my head. I still, obviously, have more to lose (about 60-70#). I abhor the idea of people doing the math and realizing I was over 400#. I feel like lying and saying 65#, but I just blow past the answer with "a lot." How would you answer that?

"Let's just say over 100 and leave it at that, shall we? and thank you very much"

amusedmonkey

I don't know, when I'm asked how much weight I lost I reply with the exact number. Just like I answered with my real weight back at my highest if asked without even blinking. People aren't blind. They have seen me at my heaviest. That was ME, not some kind of distant alternate universe version I talk about in 3rd person. I wasn't ashamed of being fat back then and I don't personally see the point of being ashamed of how fat I used to be now.

Now there is the "none of their business" perspective if I want to play the devil's advocate, so I do understand it. It's just not a big deal for me personally.

RedLipsRedDress

amusedmonkey wrote: »

I don't know, when I'm asked how much weight I lost I reply with the exact number. Just like I answered with my real weight back at my highest if asked without even blinking. People aren't blind. They have seen me at my heaviest. That was ME, not some kind of distant alternate universe version I talk about in 3rd person. I wasn't ashamed of being fat back then and I don't personally see the point of being ashamed of how fat I used to be now.

Now there is the "none of their business" perspective if I want to play the devil's advocate, so I do understand it. It's just not a big deal for me personally.

I agree. I used to dislike the idea of sharing the exact numbers with people but honestly, it's so much easier to just say it and let go. For me it's a part of the process- I don't want to hate my body or be ashamed of anything about it.

Osiris275

I don't mind people noticing but I'd rather they didn't make a big deal of it. I find it embarrassing that I had to lose weight and don't particularly like to talk about it.

Maybe that will change once I reach my goal weight

bisky

I would rather people say oh you look healthy....not skinny or focus on the weight loss itself but on making healthy lifestyle changes. Hate it when people say oh you can ......(cookies, cakes, desserts, blah, blah blah) because no I can't...l don't want to be Type 2 diabetes or pre diabetes or heavy. I want to stay out of hospitals, dR offices, be strong and healthy.

If it is someone with a weight problem and struggling then I am more than happy to share more info.

Triplestep

helenapanda wrote: »

... I don't want to hate my body or be ashamed of anything about it.

Well, I don't WANT to be ashamed over anything about my body, either ... but I am so I'll just try to focus the attention on something else when someone comments

mistress8956

I don't really care either way. If someone mentions it it makes me feel good that it's noticeable, but at the same point if they don't say anything that's fine too because it's not about them it's about me. I'm pretty open with it with friends/family and even coworkers who see me/ and what I eat every day. I wouldn't go posting it or bragging about it all over Facebook/Twitter or something though