How does anyone actually commit to this?

Cheeky_0102

Maybe don't do it for the clothes. Do it to live longer, do it to feel better in your skin, so it so you can go anywhere and do anything without getting too winded (that's my big thing, i don't want to be the fat chick waddling up to the climbing wall and having everyone stare, but i want to climb the freaking wall!)

If you think of it as a diet, you'll likely fail. If you make livable changes to your lifestyle, there's nowhere but up to go!

I do best if i think in terms of fitness. I pulled a bike trailer up a super nasty hill, there was a couple of bylaw bike cops at the top, and they had walked up! and they ride bikes all day!!! That is what I'm working for. Eat a little better every day, plan some splurges so you can keep your sanity, figure out why you are eating so badly in the first place (is it boredom, depression, habit, etc) and work on it!

MelsAuntie

Do you really WANT to lose weight and get healthier? If yes, then you'll commit. If you don't want to, then you won't. The choice is yours. Period.

lilcassers

That was a rude comment that he said to you. Joke or not... not cool. Please don't give up. Add me, look at my diary and others' diaries. Get advice, seek motivation. We are all here for you. That is what this group is for.

But most of all, YOU need to do this on your own. It is all on you.

cwolfman13

It's not that hard...unless you consider diet to be severe calorie restriction and completely abstaining from things you enjoy and have an unhealthy relationship and misunderstanding of dietary fat...then it's a ***** and pretty much impossible. But really, it's pretty damned easy when you...

eat a lot of this..



and a lot of this...



and let's not forget this...



and eat a lot less of this...



while occasionally indulging in a little of this...



all the while gettin' some of this...



and this...



and don't forget this...



and never, ever, ever forget this...



Good Livin' visualized....go get some!

TheRealParisLove

Honestly nobody can help you. If you don't want this bad enough yet all the encouragement and motivation in the world won't make you do it. Sorry you have to do this all by yourself and when you are truly ready the commitment and motivation will come.
Good luck.

She is asking how to change her mindset. It can be done. We all have had those moments when we look in the mirror and say, "Hey, you! What the hell are you doing? Why do you keep doing this to yourself?"

Then sometimes, all of the sudden, we have a burst of inner strength that seems to come out of nowhere and we accomplish what we would have previously thought impossible. The real question is: How to consistently tap that inner strength? Ultimately, it comes down to practice. You also must be willing to forgive yourself should that inner strength fail. Think of building that inner strength like building physical strength. At first you can only do so much. But after a while, you become stronger. So long as you keep working at building up that inner strength, you will get better.

The human body is a marvel. Some people have trained themselves to hold their breath for 15 minutes or more. Some people have learned how to memorize a string of numbers 10,000 digits long (normal people, not just Rainman types). A man with no legs won a gold metal in the ParaOlympics (ok, then he murdered his girlfriend, but still...).

Lrdoflamancha

Do or do not.... There is no try

MyChocolateDiet

Throw away the clothes. It doesn't sound like you're ready. Anyways when you are you will be excited and feel like you deserve brand new clothes that are in style at the moment, and you'll be right you do! It's okay if you're still knocking things around in your head right now? Getting your ducks in a row. Use that time to research on this site all the methods people use and hone in on the best ones so when your motivation kicks in you can hit the ground running. Meantime with no skinny clothes to look at husband will have nothing to talk *kitten* about and your house will have room for all the things you'll need once you get started. Workout gear or wear or whatnot. The past is the past. The future is what you make it and you'll be ready when you're ready and when that time comes nobody or no comment will stop you. Nothing will.

If I were trying to get my head on straight to start something I'd be on google looking at motivational gif's. Something might resonate with you and get you going. Also old pic's of yourself as thin, makes it beleivable. Also there's a site where you can put in all stats like height weight body shape and real people have posted their pic's. This is a great way to see yourself from the outside to get perspective on what you actually look like now. That "Oh man" moment might be the impetus for getting started. You can do it. Just get started.

refinedredbird

Honestly nobody can help you. If you don't want this bad enough yet all the encouragement and motivation in the world won't make you do it. Sorry you have to do this all by yourself and when you are truly ready the commitment and motivation will come.
Good luck.

This! Also, if you form some sort of goals and a plan on how to reach those goals it will be more motivating to get out there every day.

born2drum

You can force yourself if and only if you get to a point where you have had enough with yourself. If you are content the way you are then thats that. My motivation is to simply look and feel better and to wear size 32 jeans and have abs

heatherloveslifting

In the beginning you pretty much just have to want it badly enough to suck it up and do it. Over time it gets easier and your healthy body becomes its own reward.

GettinSwoler

depression is a great appetite supressant

trisH_7183

Here's the thing. You're going to commit to something. If you delete your MFP account, stop worrying about what you eat, stop exercising, and throw away your skinny clothes that's committing. Committing to staying fat. We often delude ourselves and say that we didn't make a choice but choosing to do nothing (or to do the wrong thing) is a choice just like counting calories and running 20 miles a week is a choice.

Make a conscience decision about what you want to commit to.

This says it .

sarahertzberger

Just keep pushing, once you see the results even if it's very small you will be stuck you will have bad days but you won't give up a huge tip I can give is take pictures and take measurements you won't regret it!!!!!!!!!!

sms670

I didn't really start out by committing to the whole thing. I started out committing to tiny positive changes. The only thing I committed to at first was to log everything I ate, not actually reduce it. Just doing that is a learning experience that for me lead to more commitments... drink more water, walk every day, eat at or near my calorie goal, and it has slowly built into a lifestyle change.

This is exactly what I did. I started logging EVERYTHING for a month, then gradually reduced net calories via lifestyle changes. At almost a year in, I've been able to RUN a 5k, before this I've never been able to run ever (I literally failed gym in high school twice). Even though I'm not to my goal weight I feel so much better all the time, all my old clothes are way too big, and I can't imagine eating like I had been for 24 years. It was a gradual process, and I'm still working on it, but it's worth it.

Alwayssohungry

Sounds like you're not actually ready for it. Try again later in life.

MB_Positif

I had a friend on here tell me in the beginning when I was wavering like you are about my commitment that she didn't think I was ready. Boy did I want to prove her wrong. Got myself together quickly and now I have been maintaining a 50 pound loss for over a year. I still have a few pounds to go, but I had some snags in the last year or so that caused me to take a long break from exercise. If I can stick to this, you can too.

rbccg1979

I think something has to either happen or a realization comes that makes a person decide they can't live how they have been anymore. I've been going through diets and exercises for years now and I can truely say this is the first time I'm really dedicated to giving it a shot. You just have to hit that point where enough is enough and you are ready to really commit and get the weight off.

Mario_Az

watch this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYOkSG6HWf4&list=FLLF0TZt5Ymhp_247Im2QGug&index=12

MamaCatO

Try taking baby steps. First off, don't think of it as a diet. It's healthier eating, a lifestyle change, anything but a diet. Then change slowly. Start by say, adding more veggies, then decrease the amounts of starchy sides, just as an example. Take a 10 minute walk in the evenings, increase it by 5 minutes every couple of days. When I figured out that I could do this at my own pace, with what feels comfortable to me, I started making all sorts of little changes and my weight just started dropping off. Not saying it will be that easy for you, but don't try doing it all once.

"Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain."

bonniecarbs

CWOLFMAN that is some darn good advice.

liesevanlingen

Start with small steps. For the evening binges, you could make a list of several things you could do instead of eat (brush your teeth, go for a walk, call a friend, put on some music and dance, drink a BIG glass of water, sit down and write out your reasons for wanting to lose weight, etc) Pick one and do it first.
--Make up "snack attack packs" --basically, cut-up fruits and veggies that you enjoy, to munch on instead. Berries, apples, peaches, pears,or peppers, celery, carrots, cherry tomatoes, and so on. You know what you like.
--Commit to a 10 minute walk a day for a week. Next week, bump it to 15 or 20 minutes, and so on. You should probably be aiming for a 30 to 40 minute brisk walk at least 5 times a week. .

Ultimately you have to do this for you. These are just some suggestions that will hopefully make it a little easier.

NavyKnightAh13

I committed to this for one very good reason: when my mom died I had to decide if I was going to change or if I was going to follow her to the grave. Well, for about 2 years, I chose the latter because it was just "easier" to do then to change.

When my husband and I found out we were having a child, I wised up very quickly. I was once again faced with the decision but this time it wasn't about me. It was about whether or not I wanted for my little boy to have a mommy when he turned 20 or face not having one. Well, I decided my little one needs a healthy momma.

Granted there is you know the clothes and the asthma and blah blah, but for me, I want to be around for my kiddo. I had to start small, but then I started to think "what more can I do?" and started to strive for more. You have to do this for yourself, and having support is great, but in the end you have to say to yourself "what am i working towards?"

doubleduofa

Does your boyfriend eat healthy? I ask because sometimes night time "binges" are due to having food around that you don't want... I have so many friends that want to eat healthy but have a hard time once their significant other wants pizza or fast food. They lost their resolve once the order is made. He should be supporting you. I started out just making sure that I had something else in the fridge to eat - something delicious. Now, I do the same thing, but I do it because I really don't want to eat pizza or fast food. It honestly sounds gross to me - never thought that would happen!

Second thing, in my experience, the night time hungries are from not eating enough at breakfast and sometimes lunch. I would make sure you are getting a good amount of protein in your breakfast, with some fat. Make sure you have enought for lunch as well and a snack 2-3 hours after lunch. This helps me tame the night time beast.

Good luck!

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I do think that you have to make a commitment. I've locked onto the idea of not relying on motivation because motivation comes and goes. You make a choice to do what needs to be done so that you can have the life you want.

But I also think there are things you can do to make it easier. For one thing, make sure your calorie goal is reasonable. If you're stuck eating 1200 calories and then trying to burn 300 at the gym then yeah, you're going to be hungry and exhausted and miserable. Don't cut out all the foods you love. At least in the beginning find exercise that you enjoy. Now, that said, as you progress you may find that your "fun" exercise just doesn't give you the results you want, in which case you may need to suck it up and do something you're not crazy about to get the results. Set goals for yourself and have a reward system in place to give incentive.

But if you're doing all those things and still feeling like you just don't want it, then maybe you just don't want it. That's okay too.

rosemaryhon

Honestly nobody can help you. If you don't want this bad enough yet all the encouragement and motivation in the world won't make you do it. Sorry you have to do this all by yourself and when you are truly ready the commitment and motivation will come.
Good luck.

Yea, my thoughts and personal experience as well.

CarlieeBear

For me, this change has felt very natural and easy at times. I let myself binge one month and gave in to my crazy hormones and it let to about 3 months of sporadic recording (at best). Fortunately, I kept working out and only gained about 5 lbs. Those are off now plus 2 more.

I got myself back on track, by committing to recording for one day, then one more, etc. I'm back on track now and losing. I was also inspired by seeing that one of my mfp friends is doing really well and thinking about all the trials she's been through since I've "known" her and how she's never given up. That inspired and encouraged me to get back at it! I have very few friends on here (by choice, though I'm open to new friends), so I know most of their stories. I have a super supportive guy so don't need a ton of friends, but they do help.

Just as I was getting back to recording another friend came back from months of not logging on. It was encouraging to see her return.

You need to find what motivates you. You also need to want it for you. My main motivation is my health. Yes, I want to look better, but mostly I want to be healthy. It's harder for me to stop working out, because I love what I've built and don't want to lose any of that hard work!

salladeve

Time goes by so fast, so I look at it as how am I going to feel in 6 months? Am I going to be happy and pat myself on the back for the xxx number of pounds I lost, and how much better I feel. Or am I going to be really depressed and think if you had only stuck to it, you'd be so much further along by now.

It really is just a mindset, that you have to commit to. Don't be discouraged if you have an off day, just get back to it the next day.

TRMite

maybe fit into those clothes isn't the best goal. It might not be realistic. I've found that I have the hardest time eating toooo much at night when my overall allotment is too low. maybe you need to up your calories and make sure you are eating more throughout the day? It will lead to more success overall. In terms of motivation, an open diary helps. others can give specific feedback that way.

TRMite

Does your boyfriend eat healthy? I ask because sometimes night time "binges" are due to having food around that you don't want... I have so many friends that want to eat healthy but have a hard time once their significant other wants pizza or fast food. They lost their resolve once the order is made. He should be supporting you. I started out just making sure that I had something else in the fridge to eat - something delicious. Now, I do the same thing, but I do it because I really don't want to eat pizza or fast food. It honestly sounds gross to me - never thought that would happen!

Second thing, in my experience, the night time hungries are from not eating enough at breakfast and sometimes lunch. I would make sure you are getting a good amount of protein in your breakfast, with some fat. Make sure you have enought for lunch as well and a snack 2-3 hours after lunch. This helps me tame the night time beast.

Good luck!

this happened to me last night actually. Yes, what others bring around makes a huge difference!

Capt_Apollo

he probably needed the closet space.


also, this way, you can buy yourself new clothes when you get down to that weight