Vent/rant-so mad and frustrated with myself
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And I also remember someone asking me if all my scales where for drugs ! Lmao !!! At that time I didn't know how to judge portions well at all yet so I needed the scale with me. I had one in my car, one at work and one at home. Lol0
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I know how you feel. It is so much easier to diet when you're by yourself, and only cooking for yourself.
My boyfriend is also a healthy weight, and eats whatever he wants to stay that way. I gained like 50 lbs since our first date and now, 4 years later. Because it's so easy to over indulge when you're watching someone else do it. And that was after losing 50 lbs before I met him
So I've been where you are.
He's super super supportive, to the point that he is cutting out carbs just so we don't have them in the house and I am not tempted. But I know he misses his sweets and pizza, and is struggling with a diet he doesn't even need, which makes me feel a bit guilty.
But anyway, don't beat yourself up over it. I am starting over, and feeling good about it. Just remember that every day you eat healthy, at least your weight isn't going to increase further
I glad to hear that I'm not the only one who has gone through this.
I'm trying not to beat myself up too much but can't help thinking of where my progress would be if I didn't stop. I'd likely be close to my goal weight.
I completely understand thinking this way, but it's not helpful. Try to reframe it as a learning experience and something that will help you later in maintenance. Learning what lets us regain is really valuable, and you know how to lose it again and are motivated to do so.0 -
Weighing food is just a waste of time anyway....
Disagree.
Also....way to be NOT supportive of the OP and her issue.
elphie....you know how to do this, you just stopping doing it. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. It's hard to re-do the hard work you have already done, but I know you can do it. YOU CAN DO IT!
Thank you! Yes I know what worked before so I just need to stop making excuses and do it.thorsmom01 wrote: »Don't be so rough on yourself ! We all have setbacks at times ! Please do not beat yourself up at all !
Just get back to it. You did it once and can do it again ! For me being in a routine helps a lot ! For example - I just weigh my food and go to the gym out of habit now. I do it all without much thought. Its part of my day now. So get yourself back into the routine again ! Once something is part of your daily regiment , its easy to stick to !
I like this saying - fake it until you make it ! You don't have to be perfect . little changes count too ! Just go through the motions even if your not feeling it until it sticks !
Haha, I'm always hard on myself. It's the perfectionist in me. I am trying to just let it go. Easier said than done.I need a listening ear, or two. I am so mad and frustrated with myself. I started this journey at 260lbs in sept 2014. By October 2015, I was down to 190 and was feeling great (was doing the c25k program and was already in the 4 th week). Early September, one of my significant others moved in. He does not have a weight issue so he pretty much eats whatever. Unfortunately I also slipped into eating "whatever" and stopped weighing food (I partially felt embarrassed weight food with them living here). I also got lazy and stopped running. I saw the scale start to go back up, but always found an excuse for why I didn't care. I should have "restarted" weighing my food and what not when I kept seeing the scale increase, but I would always say, well it's just a few lbs, no big deal, I will "restart" tomorrow. Well a few lbs turned into 10, which turned into 20 etc. now I am back at 230 and so annoyed at myself.
Sorry for rant. Typing it all out was kind of my reality check.
I'm hearing a lot of shame in this: ashamed to have gained weight back, ashamed to let someone see you weigh food, ashamed for not working out, ashamed of yourself period. The trouble is, shame is not all that helpful in actually changing behaviour. Instead, you just feel like *kitten*, and worse, that you are a *kitten* person, and of course, *kitten* people don't deserve to treat themselves well or make healthy choices. Shame usually leads to more of the same behaviour that you were originally ashamed of.
Instead, maybe try to see time period in your life this as a source of information for future choices. You learned that weighing food, working out and making different food choices work for you in achieving your goals, and that not doing those things get in the way of your achieving your goals. Sometimes you are going to make choices that support your goals, and sometimes you won't, but it doesn't mean you are a *kitten* person. It means you are a human person with a complicated emotional existence, with goals that sometimes conflict with each other and that health and nutrition are difficult issues to navigate for all of us.
What in the world? I'm assuming "kitten" was supposed to be a different word because that made no sense lol.
Anyway, not so much ashamed as j am mad at myself. And I just find it awkward to weigh food in front of others.
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If you lived here in Italy you wouldn't find it awkward at all. Being on the metric system, everyone has a scale and weighs food. Just tell people you used to live in Europe where you picked up the habit.0
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snowflake954 wrote: »If you lived here in Italy you wouldn't find it awkward at all. Being on the metric system, everyone has a scale and weighs food. Just tell people you used to live in Europe where you picked up the habit.
Really? That's awesome.0 -
I could have written this post, except for the significant other part. For me, it's just all four wheels falling off the wagon and having little resistance. But you and I have both been here long enough to know what needs to be done. And it's time to do that.1
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I could have written this post, except for the significant other part. For me, it's just all four wheels falling off the wagon and having little resistance. But you and I have both been here long enough to know what needs to be done. And it's time to do that.
Yes we do. Although it looks like a very steep hill to climb when starting back at the base.0 -
It's just a set back! You've got the right attitude, you'll achieve your goals! Wish you all the best!
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I could have written this post, except for the significant other part. For me, it's just all four wheels falling off the wagon and having little resistance. But you and I have both been here long enough to know what needs to be done. And it's time to do that.
Yes we do. Although it looks like a very steep hill to climb when starting back at the base.
You know, with all the people posting "I have 100+ lbs to lose, please be my friend", 40 doesn't sound too bad. Just don't think about it. Your SO is still with you after the gain and wants to accompany you to the gym. That sounds like a positive.0 -
smotheredincheese wrote: »
And there are so many who say this despite insisting they weigh everything. Mental attitude is the key. If you have the right way, you are more likely to overestimate.
I didn't ask for an opinion as to if I should use a food scale or not. Please take your negativity elsewhere.
i.e. only certain types of response allowed.
Freedom of speech. Negativety just an opinion...0 -
smotheredincheese wrote: »
And there are so many who say this despite insisting they weigh everything. Mental attitude is the key. If you have the right way, you are more likely to overestimate.
I didn't ask for an opinion as to if I should use a food scale or not. Please take your negativity elsewhere.
i.e. only certain types of response allowed.
Freedom of speech. Negativety just an opinion...
He just can't help it.1 -
I lost 100 pounds, and then I gained it ALL back, Plus some. I could have killed myself. (Figuratively). Now I am starting again, and I have realized that until I really forgave myself, and did this WITH my body, from a position of love instead of hate and punishment for my body, that I was not going to get anywhere. I would continue this cycle. Now, I want to be fit, and I am really ready to work for it, and keep it off this time. It has to be a complete lifestyle change, not just a diet. So get back up, brush yourself off, forgive yourself for your mistake, and correct it. Don't waste time being mad about it. (By the way, remember, being mad and stressed increases cortisol and that makes you FAT!).
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OP you have offered so many helpful, sensible, well thought out pieces of advice to so many on these forums. I know you will find the motivation again, it sounds like you also have a new support system at home so that's good too!
I'm another who finds it helpful to put my thoughts Into words so I can see it all in black and white and not the random firework and sparkly distracted neuron firings of my brain...
The good news is that since you've been successful before you know exactly what you need to do. Good luck!0 -
smotheredincheese wrote: »
And there are so many who say this despite insisting they weigh everything. Mental attitude is the key. If you have the right way, you are more likely to overestimate.
I didn't ask for an opinion as to if I should use a food scale or not. Please take your negativity elsewhere.
i.e. only certain types of response allowed.
Freedom of speech. Negativety just an opinion...
First of all freedom speech doesn't apply on private website.
Second- you were the one who jumped in with food scales are a waste of time. And then continued to badger me about it. You're right, only certain types of responses were welcomed. Ones that were helpful, supportive, and are not so negative.0 -
violetness wrote: »I lost 100 pounds, and then I gained it ALL back, Plus some. I could have killed myself. (Figuratively). Now I am starting again, and I have realized that until I really forgave myself, and did this WITH my body, from a position of love instead of hate and punishment for my body, that I was not going to get anywhere. I would continue this cycle. Now, I want to be fit, and I am really ready to work for it, and keep it off this time. It has to be a complete lifestyle change, not just a diet. So get back up, brush yourself off, forgive yourself for your mistake, and correct it. Don't waste time being mad about it. (By the way, remember, being mad and stressed increases cortisol and that makes you FAT!).
Wow. I really like your mentality and going to try it.WinoGelato wrote: »OP you have offered so many helpful, sensible, well thought out pieces of advice to so many on these forums. I know you will find the motivation again, it sounds like you also have a new support system at home so that's good too!
I'm another who finds it helpful to put my thoughts Into words so I can see it all in black and white and not the random firework and sparkly distracted neuron firings of my brain...
The good news is that since you've been successful before you know exactly what you need to do. Good luck!
I am slowly regaining my motivation which is good. That is very true, now I just have to do it.
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Wow, nasty much? Go troll someone's thread. Stop trying to bait me please.0
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Thank you everyone who was supportive and had kind words. Made me feel significantly better about the whole thing.0
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Had another huge wake up call today. Went to get a bathing suit for the gym. Unfortunately I had to shop in maternity.
trying not to be upset but not being able to pick a bathing suit out of the regular woman's section, but it's still devestating. I never want to have to do that again. I had found a swimsuit in regular woman's that I loved, but even the XL didn't fit. It's sad not being able to fit into something you like. 0 -
Elphie, you've got this. You've lost the weight before, so you definitely have that fight within you.
I was in a similar situation... started at 260 and got down to 170 a couple of years ago thanks to depression, anxiety and stress...and lazyness. One thing lead to another, and I had gained my way to 220lbs. It was hard to push myself back into it, but I am under 180lbs now. I started slow by weighing foods, then moved onto exercising, although, the first time around I did it the opposite way.
You can do this!!! Go kick some butt. 0
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