lending friends money... and having to ask for it back? :(

PepperWorm

I don't lend money to anyone. Ever. Or items of significant value.

Hope you get your money back.

Mslibb

I've lost small amounts of money on several occasions because I've also felt to awkward to ask a friend to pay it back, so I get where you're coming from. However, isn't it interesting that the lender is always the one who feels awkward and like they are jeopardising the friendship by asking, when it is actually the borrower who's putting the friendship in danger by not paying it back! I think your friend is taking advantage of you and agree with those above - if she doesn't pay quick smart, I'd ask for the items back. Shame on her. Good luck!

EngineerPrincess

You need to be straight forward and tell her you need money as you're moving and it will strain you to not get it. She either has to pay you or give the items back so you can sell them. It's not mean or unfair or even rude of you to do this, she's not borrowing them, she bought them and didn't pay. If you think you won't ever get the money once you move, she's not a good enough friend to step so cautiously around. And if you're truly good friends and she's a good person, she'll understand you need the money. Slightly awkward, but it's the right thing to do.

Margarittia

I hope you get your money or computer back.:noway::explode: :explode: Your friend needs a wake up call, she doesn't feel one bit of guilt:drinker: .......Don't offer to take payments , Tell her I will give you the money for the computer or, if she still wants it tell het you need all the money ASAP or you will be taking all the items back. Don't let her use you and your kindness. It might be time to get a new friend:flowerforyou: as she is not being a nice friend to you.:bigsmile: Good luck has no morals and doesn't value:brokenheart: :brokenheart: you so why should you let her walk all over you:sick: :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: :explode: :explode: My heart goes out to you. All the best. let us know what happens This type of person makes me sick:sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: I will tell her for you if you want

gonnamakeanewaccount

I never lend anyone money. It's just not worth the hassle.

Erikalynne18

Make sure you let us know! Im interested to see how this works out for you!

UPDATE: She never showed up last night or sent me a message on facebook :grumble: My fiancée is giving her till Wednesday before he gets involved since I've asked about the repayment a few times over the past few months. I think I'm more so disappointed in her for doing this and putting us in this situation, but he is getting angry cause he feels she is taking advantage of us which I am beginning to agree with

runner2runner

Here's the way I see it!! By asking her to pay you back, you won't be ruining the friendship!! She's already done that simply by not paying you back when she was suppose to!! And I'm pretty sure she's taking advantage of the fact that you'll be moving to another province and deliberately holding out!!

The fact is, she knew that she was supposed to pay you back for the laptop and it doesn't help the friendship any further now that she also owes your boyfriend!! What you need to do now is put your foot down and demand that she pays you and your boyfriend what she owes the two of you! In fact the two of you should actually do it together so she sees that you're not going to take any more crap from her.

And as I said, you shouldn't worry too much the friendship being ruined!! She ruined it all by herself from the moment she made the decision not to pay you and your boyfriend back. You're the one who was being a good friend and you don't have to feel bad or apologise for that!

onwarddownward

Either consider it a gift to her or just tell her that you need the money now. Either way, the friendship has taken a big hit. You're the meanie for asking for money and she's the dirtbag for not paying you in the first place.

That being said, I hired a person to do my bathroom and paid him on the second day ($1100) thinking that he would be done that afternoon. Well, it is now seven days later, my bathroom is still unusable and guess who is not around?

Never hand over the money (or the laptop) until you know you are they are going to hold up their end of the bargain.

Laura8603

Make sure you let us know! Im interested to see how this works out for you!

UPDATE: She never showed up last night or sent me a message on facebook :grumble: My fiancée is giving her till Wednesday before he gets involved since I've asked about the repayment a few times over the past few months. I think I'm more so disappointed in her for doing this and putting us in this situation, but he is getting angry cause he feels she is taking advantage of us which I am beginning to agree with

You and your fiance just need to go to her place on Wednesday to collect your stuff. Do not tell her because you give her the chance to "leave". Sorry your friend is treating you this way. She should have been honest and offered to return your stuff. Hopefully you have learned a valuable lesson.

labeachgirl

Make sure you let us know! Im interested to see how this works out for you!

UPDATE: She never showed up last night or sent me a message on facebook :grumble: My fiancée is giving her till Wednesday before he gets involved since I've asked about the repayment a few times over the past few months. I think I'm more so disappointed in her for doing this and putting us in this situation, but he is getting angry cause he feels she is taking advantage of us which I am beginning to agree with

I have a childhood friend like this, she's a nice girl, but money flows thru her fingers like water.

I doubt she will ever have the money to pay you back, because it's not a priority for her. The good thing is that you gave her items, which you can demand back. They take no money from her pocket, so I think you'll have better luck demanding the items vs the money.

DalekBrittany

This is why I never loan people money. I won't even loan family money. Possibly my parents but definitely not my fiance's parents. I also don't like owing people, either. A girl at work saw that I was scrounging around in my purse for a dollar for something to drink and she just pulled out a dollar and handed it to me. I came in the next day and carried a dollar around with me until I eventually ran into her. She didn't end up taking it, she was like OMG seriously? Don't even worry about it! But she was happy to know that I am true to my word, I think.

Tiffa0909

Tell her you need the money back and that you will be waiting at her doorstep on her next pay day.

She is either going to pay up or show her true colors , is simply not your problem her money issue.

SteelySunshine

I never ask for loans back. I don't loan more than I can afford so that way if it ends up being a gift I am ok with it. Yeah, it's awkward so I don''t ask. It hasn't come up much either.

But, if I was in your situation. I would go get my stuff and if she didn't give it, then I would call the police to have them assist in collection. Failing that small claims court.

veto1024

I try not to lend out too much money to people, but when I do, it's always under the assumption that I won't get it back. If it's too much for me to lose, I won't lend it. If I get it back, great, but I assume I won't. I would never allow money to come between me and a good friend. My advice to you is to think about how good of a friend she actually is if this can happen in the first place.

whierd

I never loan money. If a friend needs it and I have it, I give it to them. I know how money can affect friendships, so I don't even go there.

Phoenix24601

I loaned money to a friend once to pay for her bridesmaids dress. It wasn't cheap. Eh, in the end I just made it a gift. Money is just money.

TwinkieDong

do you need the money? do you value the money more than the friendship? Either way she is uncomfortable every time she sees you or talks to you. With that stated you have to either forget about the $ or ask for the $ and risk the friendship.

afreelandgti

Only one thing worse than lending money to a friend...lending to a family member

I either give it as a gift or a don't give it at all. No guilt or shame on my part regardless of what I decide.

taiyola

I cannot stand people like that!

I owe my friend a few hundred pounds, and because I've had crappy jobs and no money until I got this new job in October, he always used to say "oh don't worry, I don't need it, so just pay me back whenever you can". So I did.

I also have a laptop that he got on credit in his name and I've only ever skipped a payment twice, but then given him double the next month.

Until October I would give him a few quid here and there, then I started giving him £20 a month on top of the laptop payments. I got a tax rebate and gave him £150. Then my dog got sick, had surgery and cost me just under £1200, so I haven't paid him anything on top of the laptop money since.

I'm paying my dog off over 4 months, and once that is paid off, I will continue to pay every penny off.

If I lent someone money and they couldn't pay it all back in one go, I wouldn't mind... as long as they were making an effort to pay me when they could. It's principle.

taiyola

In regards to 'ruining the friendship' - I wouldn't class that kind of person a friend. That's not what people do to each other.