Misspelled name - big deal or not?

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  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,855 Member
    I was dating a girl "Sarah". Occasionally I would call her "Heather". . Heather is my ex-wife's name :/. . so yeah. .we're not dating anymore. .

    The funny thing is I would sometimes call my ex-wife "Sarah". . and there's a Sarah at my job that I always want to call "Heather". . So there's something about those two names.. they're stored in the same place in my brain or something. . Basically, I can never date another girl named Sarah or Heather.
  • trainingformordor
    trainingformordor Posts: 11 Member
    It has to be more irritating that it's an ex's name. My husband and I have been married for 9 years and a bunch if his family still don't spell my name correctly. It's Cheyenne, which shouldn't be that difficult especially when they are all active on my Facebook and stuff. So yeah, it's not even someone else's name and it's still very annoying. Glad he's a good sport though, it is an understandable mistake.
  • MsAmandaNJ
    MsAmandaNJ Posts: 1,248 Member
    @crazymama2both His mother called me Amy once (his ex-wife's name). I laughed it off, it was early in our relationship. She called me by his brother's ex-wife's name recently, I know he heard that and it hurt to hear her name used so soon after she left him.

    @Cameron_1969 Oh yes, I've had that plenty growing up...grandparents and parents. They'd just use any name until they stumble on the right one - brother, pets, cousins, nieces, nephews. It happens. Also, sometimes it just feels like another name suits a person, hence your Heather-Sarah dilemma.

    @trainingformordor You're right, it's an understandable mistake, but still annoying.

    I like that everyone is sharing stories :-)
  • saramickeydee
    saramickeydee Posts: 115 Member
    crazymama2both wrote: »
    We are sharing stories? People call me Amy which is the name of the girl my exhusband knocked up while we were married. IDGAF anymore but it used to piss me off. I have a Brian with an I too :)

    *gasp* awful

    Some people call me the space cowboy.
  • Peter_Brady
    Peter_Brady Posts: 3,750 Member
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  • yayamom3
    yayamom3 Posts: 939 Member
    TavistockToad wrote: »
    if we're sharing, last time my mum was round for dinner she saw some post on the table, and said in a really annoyed/confused voice " why does that say Mrs Smith on it?"

    because that's my married name, and I've been married for nearly 4 years....

    We've been married for 25 years, and my mom wrote me a check the other day with my maiden name on it. I thought it was hilarious!
  • JeepHair77
    JeepHair77 Posts: 1,291 Member
    People are forever getting my name wrong - misspelling it, mispronouncing it, or shortening it to a common nickname (which I do not care for). It's irritating.

    I used to let it go, and just respond to whatever, but I've gotten cranky in my old age, I suppose, and now I correct people. Politely and nicely and with no judgment, the first time, because everybody makes mistakes (including me) but if they can't be bothered to get it right after I've told them nicely once or twice? It ticks me off.
  • wrknonmedaily
    wrknonmedaily Posts: 203 Member
    I once heard someone say, "Never let anyone mess up your name. Always correct them. For some of us, that's all we got is our name."
  • _John_
    _John_ Posts: 8,646 Member
    I bet OP has totally called out her ex's name during *kitten*.
  • MsAmandaNJ
    MsAmandaNJ Posts: 1,248 Member
    _John_ wrote: »
    I bet OP has totally called out her ex's name during *kitten*.
    I actually haven't, it's awkward for me to use someone's name at that time. I did it once in a previous relationship and it felt weird so I never did it again. He knows I'm talking to him, there isn't anyone else in the room...except maybe a cat or two.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    _John_ wrote: »
    I bet OP has totally called out her ex's name during *kitten*.

    :laugh:
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    How does your husband feel about it? You're really offended for him, but have you asked how he feels?
  • MsAmandaNJ
    MsAmandaNJ Posts: 1,248 Member
    nutmegoreo wrote: »
    How does your husband feel about it? You're really offended for him, but have you asked how he feels?
    He says it's no big deal, but I'm not sure he's being totally truthful there. He doesn't focus on little things like that, more of a "bigger problem" thinker.
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    MsAmandaNJ wrote: »
    nutmegoreo wrote: »
    How does your husband feel about it? You're really offended for him, but have you asked how he feels?
    He says it's no big deal, but I'm not sure he's being totally truthful there. He doesn't focus on little things like that, more of a "bigger problem" thinker.

    Men really react differently to these things than women. It's not like their names are dissimilar and people are calling him something completely different. People often add an "h" to my name. It annoys me, but I don't feel the need to take it personally. Maybe send some PMs to people to remind them, but this seems to be taking more of your energy than it needs to. If he was clearly upset, that would be different. It honestly sounds like you are taking it on more than you need to. Just my opinion on it, of course.
  • MsAmandaNJ
    MsAmandaNJ Posts: 1,248 Member
    @nutmegoreo You're spot on! I appreciate your opinion, makes a lot of sense. Thank you!
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    MsAmandaNJ wrote: »
    @nutmegoreo You're spot on! I appreciate your opinion, makes a lot of sense. Thank you!

    Cool! I'm often worried about sharing my thoughts because some people can take it really personally and get offended. Now to think about what you can do about it to reduce your own response. Best of luck!
  • alyssa0061
    alyssa0061 Posts: 652 Member
    I guess I disagree with Brian and Bryan being two separate names. They're the same name, they're just spelled differently. My name is Alyssa. It's the same name as Alissa, Allissa, Allysa and so on. My name is NOT Alisia, Alicia, Alyce and it is most certainly not Melissa. I couldn't care less if someone spells it wrong. And I rarely correct anyone who pronounces it wrong unless they call me Melissa. I really can't see anyone spelling it incorrectly with malicious intent. People call me Melissa because they know it bugs the *kitten* out of me.

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