Battling depression
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otherusernamestaken wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »I want to reemphasize that moods are like the weather. Sometimes you have to wait out winter, but Spring will come. Also, even in the summer, there are storms. And they pass. No one stays the same mood all the time.
I know a lot of people are recommending medication to rebalance brain chemicals, but I would urge you to try other things first. Exercise had been shown to be as or more effective in treating depression than meds. The side effects of those medicines can further the depression. (Hair loss, weight gain, suicidal ideation, diabetes, kidney problems). Just hold on to the idea that 1) it will pass and 2) with God, you CAN have joy while you wait 3) It can get better faster than you think if you pursue getting better every day with prayer, gratitude, exercise, staying away from things that make it worse.
Depression has NOTHING to do with moods. It is a physical brain disorder. Physical, not mental.
This...and what if the OP is an atheist? Not everyone believes in the power of prayer.
Just read an article this morning regarding MRI scans of alcoholics. They found that those who prayed showed decreased cravings.
So even science agrees that prayer can change brain physiology for the better.
I'm sorry you are so down on something that 1) works and with 2) has no bad side effects.
I just looked the study up. The participants were long-time AA members who recited an AA prayer. So in other words, people who already found that the AA methods worked for them were scanned, and their brain patterns verified the AA methods worked for them. That's not taking a random selection of alcoholics and asking them to pray. I don't believe in God, and prayer would not help me. It would feel useless. Please don't push your ideology without knowing the OP's beliefs.
OP, I agree with the others who have said to find a psychiatrist who can assess if you would be helped by medication. Even if you don't go on medicine, a psychiatrist may be able to pair you with a therapist who specializes in counseling that will benefit you most. Some people need CBT, some need to understand their brains better, some just need to talk. If your current therapist isn't helping, you need to find someone who can.
Talk to your family. Don't be embarrassed. You shouldn't have to go through this alone.1 -
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KwaziiNeko wrote: »I'm so lonely, it hurts me so much and I'm up all night worrying with anxiety.
I see a therapist but it's not helping me at all.
I don't know what to do anymore
I need help, advice or something
I would talk to a family member but I'm so embarrassed about feeling this way and I don't want them to feel upset because I'm going through this.
Lonliness is painful. Sometimes, physically so.
You may need a new therapist. As in all relationships, not everyone can adhere with who we are.
Seek more help. DO NOT CLOSE YOURSELF OFF. Contact MIND or a like organisation.
See above. You are not at the point of giving up. Recognise that fact and act on it.
There is truly, TRULY, nothing to be embarrased about. I'm so, so grateful that my son opened up to me over how he was feeling(I truly thought two years ago that I would lose him), your feelings are not debateable. Nor unimportant, trite or worthless.
Without knowing anything about you, let me say this: You are loved more than you will ever know. Love yourself. Love yourself to seek out everything you need to put yourself on a happier, healthier path. I wish you all the best in the world.
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otherusernamestaken wrote: »We all have our own beliefs I'd appreciate you respecting mine rather than putting me down because I don't believe what you do.
My father is alive today because of modern medicine. I believe in science.
And that's fine that you take advantage of scientific advances in medicine. There is nothing wrong with that.
And notice I didn't put you down. I'm telling people that there are alternative therapies to conventional medications to depression that are as or more effective that do not carry the risks that medicines do. Medicine is only one tool in the toolbox and sometimes other tools work better and cause less damage.
Choose your words wisely, you have been basically saying anyone who doesn't believe in your God is somehow in the wrong.
Prayer is not a therapy.0 -
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KwaziiNeko wrote: »I'm so lonely, it hurts me so much and I'm up all night worrying with anxiety.
I see a therapist but it's not helping me at all.
I don't know what to do anymore
I need help, advice or something
I would talk to a family member but I'm so embarrassed about feeling this way and I don't want them to feel upset because I'm going through this.
My father has depression and when he talks to others about it , he feels alot better . Supportive friends and family is the key . He takes meds every week to help with it and he is in great form . Never hold back and bottle things up . There is always good people out there willing to help.1 -
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I've suffered from depression since I was 9 and anxiety for the last 10 years. It's great that you are seeking professional therapy, but medications can become necessary due to the chemistry changes that happen in the brain during depression and anxiety. It may be a good idea to take that step at this point. There are lots of great medications on the market and a low dose could be enough to get you back on your feet. It took me a few months to find the right one, but pulling out of depression was simply not possible for me through other means.2
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I have been suffering from depression for awhile now and I am taking zoloft and aderall to fight it; I also have a therapist who has helped me a lot. I know what you are going through, it is awful to see dark clouds all the time but do not give up and see a doctor who can prescribe you something. Go exercise and eat healthy becasuse that's what got me out of bed and after losing 40 pounds I feel alive again, hang in there and do not give up on this beautiful life.1
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Everyone has their beliefs and what works for them. Ive delt with depression yrs back. Meditating/prayer...God. Thats what helped me out and really I had to start thinking positivie, then I started feeling positive. But thats just me. I agree that it could take more than just that there could be harmone inbalance who knows.
Don't feel embarrassed, reach out to someone close to you, having someone just listen is a start.
Lord, You are my portion and my cup of blessings; You hold my future.1 -
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It can't hurt to soak in Epsom salts for 30 minutes. It might help because the skin absorbs magnesium from the water. Most people are very deficient in magnesium in their diets. Magnesium is used in the nervous system to operate properly. Anxiety and depression are work products of the nervous system. It can't hurt and it might help. This is advice I myself took. It didn't hurt and it did help.0
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OP - are you doing what your therapist has asked you to do? Are you genuinely working with him/her or are you just showing up and going through the motions? If you are working and putting in the effort, have you sought out another therapist? Is your therapist qualified to prescribe medication? Have you tried group therapy? You have to find a way that works for you and you still have to put in the effort. Depression is a *kitten* disease because it causes people to resist putting in the effort necessary to get better. You have to fight it enough to get real help and then use it. No therapist can help you without your help.0
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Reaching out here is a great sign. I know what you mean about loneliness and can be truly debilitating.
If you are religious it can be helpful, but I also believe in the power of the medication that is out there when prescribed by a professional.
The two things that have been the biggest help for me are physical activity and my dog. Exercise and getting out of my apartment do help me to feel better. Having to take care of a dog makes me get up and out as well, plus the company a dog gives is really helpful. I can't let depression totally take control because there is something that needs me to take care of him and sitting with a dog in my lap for a couple of hours really is relaxing.0 -
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I can only speak from my own experience, which is that depression sucks and like sunny mentioned above, it causes sufferers to feel unable to do the things that make us feel better. Also, not all suggestions are feasible for everyone. Not everyone can afford therapy or medication. Not everyone believes in following a spiritual practice. There's no one right answer because no one can know what it is that will cause a particular person to get unstuck.
You don't have to talk to your family about your depression, unless you want to and you need them to take you to medical appointments or something. Talking can help, but if you don't trust them to understand, it may make you feel worse.
If you have a primary care physician you do trust, I would talk to that person. They will probably be able to help you (but if not, move on to someone else).
Online, you can find several resources:
There's a depression forum online.
There's All About Depression.
And Depression Understood.
I take medication, go to therapy, and I also have a spiritual practice that works for me. Making healthy choices helps me fight depression and anxiety: eating right, exercising, getting enough sleep all help me feel right in the world. I am also in recovery, but even if you aren't an alcoholic or addict, you may want to consider not drinking or using drugs, since many substances are depressants or at the very least mess with your body chemistry. I find that even sugar causes a reaction in my body, so I am mindful about that.
I hope you are able to find a treatment plan that works for you, OP! Please feel free to message me if you want.0 -
Hi, OP. I was diagnosed with chronic major depression with OCPD and suicidal ideation 18 years ago, at the age of nine. This means I am almost always sad, live a life of rigidly structured routine, and about half of my brain wants me to kill myself at any given time.
You wouldn't know any of this to look at me, and this is mainly because I have an amazing and attentive therapist, exercise a lot, and participate in activities where others watch me--all the time. I also participate in weekly volunteer service work because my illnesses manifest themselves worst when I'm alone. My issues stem from some pretty severe childhood trauma experiences that I will likely never recover from. I am not on medication, but was for a while (under a previous therapist) and it did very little for me.
Your physical pain sounds a lot like a chronic depression symptom. I'd encourage you to build out your support network. I know it can feel like no one cares about or understands the issues you're experiencing, but your oldest friends and most-loved family will definitely be willing to help you. However, they may not know *how* to help you--you will have to be very clear, direct and honest about what it is you need. Most people do not suffer from severe depression and never will, so getting them to understand your disease is pointless. The actionable thing to do is to get them to provide you with what you need so that your illness is manageable--whether that's active listening, tenderness, a shared activity/time, etc., are things you need to determine.
If your therapist isn't helping, figure out why. If it's because you haven't been honest about what it is you really need, try that. If it's because the therapist is a poor listener or a bad fit, find someone else. You have to be an active participant in your recovery. People can tell you to cheer up in a thousand different ways, but until you want to get better for your own self, you won't process anything they say.
My two cents.1 -
Try to get a walk in every day on top of your therapy if you aren't already. Studies show walking can be just as effective as a medication regimen and can also be done while on medications. Talk to your family, even if they don't understand at first. Try and keep a journal of your moods, goals, and blocks in your life.
I've been suffering from chronic depression for over 15 years. It's the small steps that help the most.1 -
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otherusernamestaken wrote: »Kasner1975 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »We all have our own beliefs I'd appreciate you respecting mine rather than putting me down because I don't believe what you do.
My father is alive today because of modern medicine. I believe in science.
And that's fine that you take advantage of scientific advances in medicine. There is nothing wrong with that.
And notice I didn't put you down. I'm telling people that there are alternative therapies to conventional medications to depression that are as or more effective that do not carry the risks that medicines do. Medicine is only one tool in the toolbox and sometimes other tools work better and cause less damage.
Choose your words wisely, you have been basically saying anyone who doesn't believe in your God is somehow in the wrong.
Prayer is not a therapy.
Completely with @synchkat
The belief in religion is not for everyone. If you believe in prayer, then that acts as a placebo effect for your benefit. However, it is useless for those who are not of the faith minded. It's foolish to think that a non-believer who prays suddenly could gain the peaceful elements from said prayer, to alleviate depression.
I myself have been mediated in the past, for clinical depression, PTSD, and several forms of anxiety. I chose not to be now as a personal choice. I try to find my peace from within. The point is, there are many ways to battle mental health issues, and no one can tell you what is right for you. Suggesting that someone is wrong for not agreeing with your views is preposterous and childish.
I don't expect everyone to agree with my views. Quite the opposite. What I am suggesting goes against what you have been taught in school and reinforced in the media all of your lives.
That doesn't change the fact that prayer works, and doesn't do the harm that medicine does, because they all have side effects.
I am not anti-medication. Take medication if you have to. I had surgery, they gave me Valium for pain. I took it for a few days and weaned myself off it with Tylenol, because I understand the benefits of meds come with risks. Even over the counter medicines I take only when really needed, but if I really need it, I am not against taking it.
But if there is another way, I'd suggest exploring it. Why have invasive back surgery if two weeks of specialized exercise would work better without the risk of paralysis? Similarly, a combination of prayer, gratitude journaling, exercise, low caffeine, low sugar, no chemical depressants like alcohol or pot would work better than Seroquil and has a much lower risk of death and disease. Some people need medication. Many do not.
I have no expectation that you would try prayer to help you do or overcome anything. My advice wasn't for you. Do what works for you. Have the back surgery, take the painkillers for the pain, then the Adderall for the focus you lost from the painkillers, then take Ambien for the sleep you lost from the Adderall, take the Lipitor for the cholesterol that got raised on the previous others, take the Viagra for the erections you lost from the Lipitor, take the methadone to rid yourself of the addictions to the drug cocktail that no longer work in reasonable quantities. It's your life, I'm not telling you how to live it.
My advice was to give her what worked for me. It is very childish to disagree with that.
The OP didn't ask for your religious voodoo BS. She's seeking help. She needs to get help from qualified professionals, not people who are so backwards and stupid as to still be following a book written thousands of years ago and disproven during the Enlightement. Have you ever actually read that piece of trash? Without selectively ignoring the parts you don't like? I guaranty you're not following it. No sane person would.
Children believe in fairy tales. Adults look at evidence based medicine.2 -
Change therapist
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otherusernamestaken wrote: »sunnybeaches105 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »Kasner1975 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »We all have our own beliefs I'd appreciate you respecting mine rather than putting me down because I don't believe what you do.
My father is alive today because of modern medicine. I believe in science.
And that's fine that you take advantage of scientific advances in medicine. There is nothing wrong with that.
And notice I didn't put you down. I'm telling people that there are alternative therapies to conventional medications to depression that are as or more effective that do not carry the risks that medicines do. Medicine is only one tool in the toolbox and sometimes other tools work better and cause less damage.
Choose your words wisely, you have been basically saying anyone who doesn't believe in your God is somehow in the wrong.
Prayer is not a therapy.
Completely with @synchkat
The belief in religion is not for everyone. If you believe in prayer, then that acts as a placebo effect for your benefit. However, it is useless for those who are not of the faith minded. It's foolish to think that a non-believer who prays suddenly could gain the peaceful elements from said prayer, to alleviate depression.
I myself have been mediated in the past, for clinical depression, PTSD, and several forms of anxiety. I chose not to be now as a personal choice. I try to find my peace from within. The point is, there are many ways to battle mental health issues, and no one can tell you what is right for you. Suggesting that someone is wrong for not agreeing with your views is preposterous and childish.
I don't expect everyone to agree with my views. Quite the opposite. What I am suggesting goes against what you have been taught in school and reinforced in the media all of your lives.
That doesn't change the fact that prayer works, and doesn't do the harm that medicine does, because they all have side effects.
I am not anti-medication. Take medication if you have to. I had surgery, they gave me Valium for pain. I took it for a few days and weaned myself off it with Tylenol, because I understand the benefits of meds come with risks. Even over the counter medicines I take only when really needed, but if I really need it, I am not against taking it.
But if there is another way, I'd suggest exploring it. Why have invasive back surgery if two weeks of specialized exercise would work better without the risk of paralysis? Similarly, a combination of prayer, gratitude journaling, exercise, low caffeine, low sugar, no chemical depressants like alcohol or pot would work better than Seroquil and has a much lower risk of death and disease. Some people need medication. Many do not.
I have no expectation that you would try prayer to help you do or overcome anything. My advice wasn't for you. Do what works for you. Have the back surgery, take the painkillers for the pain, then the Adderall for the focus you lost from the painkillers, then take Ambien for the sleep you lost from the Adderall, take the Lipitor for the cholesterol that got raised on the previous others, take the Viagra for the erections you lost from the Lipitor, take the methadone to rid yourself of the addictions to the drug cocktail that no longer work in reasonable quantities. It's your life, I'm not telling you how to live it.
My advice was to give her what worked for me. It is very childish to disagree with that.
The OP didn't ask for your religious voodoo BS. She's seeking help. She needs to get help from qualified professionals, not people who are so backwards and stupid as to still be following a book written thousands of years ago and disproven during the Enlightement. Have you ever actually read that piece of trash? Without selectively ignoring the parts you don't like? I guaranty you're not following it. No sane person would.
Children believe in fairy tales. Adults look at evidence based medicine.
You sound like an angry atheist. I'm not telling you what to do. I'm not even telling the OP what to do.
I'm telling the OP what worked for me.
Other people told them what worked for them.
Maybe your medication needs adjusting so you can be a little calmer. And insulting someone and their beliefs is a very intolerant thing to do. Perhaps you can use some sensitivity training or a prescription for Valium.
Not angry but I'm incredibly intolerant of uneducated crazies. Your religion is an award winner in that category. So I have a better idea here, is it your belief that prayer and medication work together for depression like snake oil together with eating at a calorie deficit work for weight loss? Unlike you, I don't need voodoo to treat me as I'm healthy.
The power a prayer:
http://time.com/8750/faith-healing-parents-jailed-after-second-childs-death/
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2016/04/21/idaho-woman-blames-parents-for-health-woes-seeks-change-in-law-protecting-faith-healers.html
http://www.quackwatch.com/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/faith.html
https://www.sciencebasedmedicine.org/faith-healing/
The good acts of priests:
http://bishop-accountability.org/priestdb/PriestDBbylastName-A.html
http://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/what-pope-benedict-knew-about-abuse-in-the-catholic-church
Honesty and good intentions:
http://www.forbes.com/sites/walterpavlo/2013/11/18/fraud-thriving-in-u-s-churches-but-you-wouldnt-know-it/#f434d1c6feaf0 -
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otherusernamestaken wrote: »sunnybeaches105 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »sunnybeaches105 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »Kasner1975 wrote: »otherusernamestaken wrote: »We all have our own beliefs I'd appreciate you respecting mine rather than putting me down because I don't believe what you do.
My father is alive today because of modern medicine. I believe in science.
And that's fine that you take advantage of scientific advances in medicine. There is nothing wrong with that.
And notice I didn't put you down. I'm telling people that there are alternative therapies to conventional medications to depression that are as or more effective that do not carry the risks that medicines do. Medicine is only one tool in the toolbox and sometimes other tools work better and cause less damage.
Choose your words wisely, you have been basically saying anyone who doesn't believe in your God is somehow in the wrong.
Prayer is not a therapy.
Completely with @synchkat
The belief in religion is not for everyone. If you believe in prayer, then that acts as a placebo effect for your benefit. However, it is useless for those who are not of the faith minded. It's foolish to think that a non-believer who prays suddenly could gain the peaceful elements from said prayer, to alleviate depression.
I myself have been mediated in the past, for clinical depression, PTSD, and several forms of anxiety. I chose not to be now as a personal choice. I try to find my peace from within. The point is, there are many ways to battle mental health issues, and no one can tell you what is right for you. Suggesting that someone is wrong for not agreeing with your views is preposterous and childish.
I don't expect everyone to agree with my views. Quite the opposite. What I am suggesting goes against what you have been taught in school and reinforced in the media all of your lives.
That doesn't change the fact that prayer works, and doesn't do the harm that medicine does, because they all have side effects.
I am not anti-medication. Take medication if you have to. I had surgery, they gave me Valium for pain. I took it for a few days and weaned myself off it with Tylenol, because I understand the benefits of meds come with risks. Even over the counter medicines I take only when really needed, but if I really need it, I am not against taking it.
But if there is another way, I'd suggest exploring it. Why have invasive back surgery if two weeks of specialized exercise would work better without the risk of paralysis? Similarly, a combination of prayer, gratitude journaling, exercise, low caffeine, low sugar, no chemical depressants like alcohol or pot would work better than Seroquil and has a much lower risk of death and disease. Some people need medication. Many do not.
I have no expectation that you would try prayer to help you do or overcome anything. My advice wasn't for you. Do what works for you. Have the back surgery, take the painkillers for the pain, then the Adderall for the focus you lost from the painkillers, then take Ambien for the sleep you lost from the Adderall, take the Lipitor for the cholesterol that got raised on the previous others, take the Viagra for the erections you lost from the Lipitor, take the methadone to rid yourself of the addictions to the drug cocktail that no longer work in reasonable quantities. It's your life, I'm not telling you how to live it.
My advice was to give her what worked for me. It is very childish to disagree with that.
The OP didn't ask for your religious voodoo BS. She's seeking help. She needs to get help from qualified professionals, not people who are so backwards and stupid as to still be following a book written thousands of years ago and disproven during the Enlightement. Have you ever actually read that piece of trash? Without selectively ignoring the parts you don't like? I guaranty you're not following it. No sane person would.
Children believe in fairy tales. Adults look at evidence based medicine.
You sound like an angry atheist. I'm not telling you what to do. I'm not even telling the OP what to do.
I'm telling the OP what worked for me.
Other people told them what worked for them.
Maybe your medication needs adjusting so you can be a little calmer. And insulting someone and their beliefs is a very intolerant thing to do. Perhaps you can use some sensitivity training or a prescription for Valium.
Not angry but I'm incredibly intolerant of uneducated crazies. Your religion is an award winner in that category. So I have a better idea here, is it your belief that prayer and medication work together for depression like snake oil together with eating at a calorie deficit work for weight loss?
I am well educated, and tested in the 99th percentile.
So you are wrong in that assessment. Your intolerance blinds you in more ways than you are aware.
If you'd like my view on medication it is this: take it if you must, but only if you must, and for only as long as you must. The reason for that view is scientific, not religious. With the benefits come the risks of serious side effects. The key is to get the benefits and mediate the risks. To help and not harm. You know, like doctors swear in their oaths. So I vaccinate, take antibiotics when battling bacterial infections, etc.
As an example, when I get a headache, I drink a glass of water and close my eyes - many headaches come from dehydration or eye strain. If that doesn't work, I give my temples a massage with my fingertips. If that doesn't work, I go deeper. I note my thought patterns - was I thinking stressful thoughts?
If so, then I think about all the things I'm thankful for, and give God thanks. Prayer, for me, is the best stress reliever I've ever experienced. (Even more than pot, orgasm, comfort foods).
95% of the time the headache quickly disappears. The other 5% of the time, the headache worsens, and I take a Tylenol or aspirin. The medicine would have blocked the pain from 99% of the headaches, but I would not have dealt with the dehydration, eye strain, pressure or stress issues that the pain was alerting me to take care of. Doing those things saved my kidneys 95% of the load of handling the medicines, since I used Tylenol only 5% of the time I have headaches. In addition, long term use of painkillers increases a person's sensitivity to pain. If that is what I do to avoid Tylenol, whose risk is stomach bleeding and kidney problems, what do you think I'd do to avoid taking something that has the risk of suicide?
The only way to know if other, less harmful approaches would work is to try them. At worst, it won't help. Medicine, at worst, can kill.
The medicine is always available as an option. But I see it as a last resort, not the first.
You clearly didn't read the links above if you don't think belief in religion can kill. The difference between medicine and religion is that various approved medications have been through a rigorous process to demonstrate their effectiveness. During testing side effects are identified and the manufacturers are required to include warnings in the packaging. It's a shame that religion isn't subject to a similar process. Then again, in contrast to your pushing the OP to pray, you seem to be taking a pretty mild approach to religion in your own life. You use medication in a reasonable way and supplement it with prayer as a form of meditation to relax you. That's hardly a testament to the prayer's ability to cure depression. Interestingly enough though, your final statement regarding religion (if that is what you are referring to) isn't much different than many of alternative medicine's proponents, i.e. "it can't hurt." If you're as intelligent as you claim then you know that.
Your religion is your business and if you kept it that way, I would have never come in here with the responses I posted. You are preying on a person who may be suffering from a serious illness and you are offering "prayer." Perhaps rather than coming in here preaching, you should push the OP to seek professional and qualified help. You're right about one thing, if the OP follows her doctor's advice and takes any medication that may be prescribed to help her by a M.D., then a little additional meditation and/or prayer to whatever diety floats her boat probably won't hurt.0 -
Thanks y'all for the advice!
I'm seeing a psychiatrist on the 31st, I think I need to change my medication, this is my first time being on medication.
Yes I am a Christian, I have a problem about praying and meditating, which is something I need to work on.
I also need to start journaling but I don't know how to write put my emotions on paper.
Anyways
Thank y'all from the bottom of my heart!
I thought my post was going to get ignored and I also thought I'm the only person in the world that feels this way.
- Bianca4
This discussion has been closed.
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