Toddlers are gross

lisahebert186

Chocolate chip cookies, they said. So I have my toddler a chocolate chip cookie. He took one bite and then proceeded to smear it all over everything.

gothchiq

lol yeah. I haven't got the patience. My "kids" are cats.

synchkat

babies are grosser. They spit stuff up and then the diapers. ick
I'm so not maternal

Thisnameischosen

Yep. The mess never.fricken.ends.

ponycyndi

I've got 3 boys. One thing you never want to hear: "that's not mud"

Owlie45

Lol yes they are.
My mom gave my nephew a soft caramel. He put it in his mouth. Everything great right? Nope I look over and it's running down the front of him. WTH kid. Had to be told to chew and swallow it.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

arditarose

That's like...one of the least gross things I've heard of a toddler doing.

I work at early childhood programs. The other day this kid started crying after being scolded, but having just put a big piece of banana in his mouth that he was chewing. He started spitting up the banana which was basically liquid at this point and I caught it in my hand.

lisahebert186

I have three kids and my youngest, the 18 month old, is far messier than the other two were. Don't get me wrong it's all fun and games until a toddler with a mouth full of cookie all of a sudden decides he doesn't want that cookie He wants a new one. Lol.

Shells918

gothchiq wrote: »

lol yeah. I haven't got the patience. My "kids" are cats.

So are mine.

lenoresdream

My older sister took all the mom genes and left me none. I am so not a parent. But I love hanging out with my friend's kids and I learn so much about kids through them.

Like the fact that everything at arms reach level has a permanent coat of "oh god that's sticky and I don't want to know what it is".

Got my first filthy-handed leg-hug (they wrap their little arms around my legs) and ended up with sticky knees from them. This was a phenomenon I'd only ever heard of prior to that.

Dang but they sure are cute sometimes. Sticky faces and all.

lisahebert186

It's been great birth control for my younger sister. Watching her change a dirty diaper was priceless. Lol. My oldest is 10 and my sister is 22. So they have grown up together.

lenoresdream

Great birth control indeed! I get my loving children fix when I need it but when I can't take anymore tantrums I peace out lol.

PS this whole thread has made my night, thank you all!

lisahebert186

That's like my sister. She is taking the oldest two for the day tomorrow and the bringing them home. That's all she can handle.

carlyp79

My toddlers used to chew on dried apricots and then put the squishy chewed remnants aside to discover later. Ew.

Splitbygreg

Kids....eww

Noelani1503

My 2 yr old just discovered he can see some of the things he ate recently in his poop. Yesterday he said kiwi in poop? Eat it? Eat kiwi poop?! Want now!

Yeah. Toddlers are gross.

lenoresdream

Noelani1503 wrote: »

My 2 yr old just discovered he can see some of the things he ate recently in his poop. Yesterday he said kiwi in poop? Eat it? Eat kiwi poop?! Want now!

Yeah. Toddlers are gross.

lisahebert186

Noelani1503 wrote: »

My 2 yr old just discovered he can see some of the things he ate recently in his poop. Yesterday he said kiwi in poop? Eat it? Eat kiwi poop?! Want now!

Yeah. Toddlers are gross.

Lol. That's fantastic.

EmilyEmpowered

My 16 month old discovered how to take his diapers off recently, and his favorite time to do it is when its full.



I don't mean with pee.



Pretty fun when daddy stepped in it, thought it was a cookie the baby left out early, and picked it up to "check it" by smelling it

Noelani1503

EmilyEmpowered wrote: »

My 16 month old discovered how to take his diapers off recently, and his favorite time to do it is when its full.



I don't mean with pee.



Pretty fun when daddy stepped in it, thought it was a cookie the baby left out early, and picked it up to "check it" by smelling it

Lol. I've heard this is a problem with most kids. I guess that's a big benefit of cloth diapering. I can barely get the damn thing off. No way the kid can do it.

kathrynseddon1993

Mine is poorly right now and I MUCH prefer baby puke to toddler puke They are disgusting, mine likes to wait till I've opened her nappy to start smearing her bum all over my bed and try to run away while trying to grab the poo. I can't believe I don't get paid for this *kitten*.

wolverine66

newmeadow wrote: »

Yes, I'll never understand why housetrained, cute, clean, well behaved dogs aren't allowed into restaurants but babies and toddlers are. I think some guy tried to open and operate a baby/toddler-free restaurant once but the parental units caused an uproar about it and he never got it off the ground.

There are a number of restaurants across the country that are "kid free." I think that restaurants that have gone "kid free" have actually flourished. parents and non-parents support the idea. Sure you will always have some dissenters when you make a move like that, but still, they are supported.

As a parent, I know I can definitely appreciate kid free zones and I know other parents who do as well. I mean, if I want to plan a date with my wife, going to a kid free restaurant is definitely a better option. Why would I want to plan a date without my son, and go to a plce that has kids running around? You will find less "parental units" causing an uproar than those who support things like this.

_incogNEATo_

My oldest found the food coloring yesterday. When your children are laughing together and having a good time, you tend to leave them alone. If I ever hear laughing coming from them again while not under direct supervision, you can bet I'll have them in eye's sight within milliseconds.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Char231023

When they are quiet is when you know they are up to something,

lisahebert186

_incogNEATo_ wrote: »

My oldest found the food coloring yesterday. When your children are laughing together and having a good time, you tend to leave them alone. If I ever hear laughing coming from them again while not under direct supervision, you can bet I'll have them in eye's sight within milliseconds.

Lol that is hilarious.

gothchiq

Next time I feel put upon about cleaning the kitty pan, I will just think back to these kid stories. lol.

When people ask me why I never had kids, I try not to offend them by saying frankly "Bleah, don't want them, can't stand them!" Instead, I just bat my lashes and say "oh, you really don't want someone like me raising children." LMAO, it stops that line of inquiry immediately.

I had myself sterilized at 37. Would have done earlier if I could have found a cooperative doctor, but I live in the South...

jlahorn

wolverine66 wrote: »

newmeadow wrote: »

I think some guy tried to open and operate a baby/toddler-free restaurant once but the parental units caused an uproar about it and he never got it off the ground.

There are a number of restaurants across the country that are "kid free." I think that restaurants that have gone "kid free" have actually flourished. parents and non-parents support the idea.

Yeah, I just did a quick Google for childfree restaurants, found a bunch of news stories debating the pros and cons, and all of the restaurants I saw mentioned are still open and in some cases very successful years after they banned kids.

I wish the concept would be more widely adopted. I was out at a nice dinner just a few weekends ago when a free-range toddler ran under some unrelated couple's table and smacked full force into some poor woman holding a full glass of red wine. I was actually pretty impressed with her juggling skills - she recovered completely without spilling a drop If that had been a server with a tray full of food and drinks...

mpkanewske

Now that I have a very young child I wonder how horribly messy I was when I was a kid. Oh well, they have no control over it really.

lisahebert186

I like to let my children be creative and use their imagination. Sometimes this means I'm cleaning the bathroom everyday because I find all sorts of toothpaste "experiments". I found one under the sink.