should I fight for him ?

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  • JaneSnowe
    JaneSnowe Posts: 1,283 Member
    edited July 2016
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    My opinion? You need to let this go and focus on your own personal growth.
  • chocolate_owl
    chocolate_owl Posts: 1,695 Member
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    xmichaelyx wrote: »
    If he'd leave his gf for you, he's a douche. Move on.

    Also, you're 22. When you're 30, you'll laugh about him and this post.

    He's a douche for saying he'd leave his girlfriend and not already doing it. He's not being honest to someone about his feelings, one way or the other.
  • Koldnomore
    Koldnomore Posts: 1,613 Member
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    Aggree with Binary..
    Not ALL men, but quite a few, are happy to have tag alongs. I have never seen it end well. If he is willing to string you along when he already has a girlfriend, will you ever really trust him not to do the same to you with some other woman in the future?

    You shouldn't have to 'fight' for anyone. When the right one comes along you will know, You will be the world to him, and he to you.
  • KassiesJourney
    KassiesJourney Posts: 306 Member
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    If he doesn't leave this other girl then he doesn't care for you as much as he says. Don't wait for him. I am sorry for being so blunt but it just isn't worth it.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,948 Member
    edited July 2016
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    If it were me, I would lay down one ground rule. And that would be to not hang out at all unless he ends it with his other girlfriend and wants to truly be with you. It's not good being stuck in the middle getting hurt. Make him make a decision. It doesn't have to be rushed, but he needs to be CLEAR.

    That being said... if it's meant to be, you and he would have already known. I'm not a believer in second chances, unless you're already married. The reason for breaking up the first time is always a good reason. Even if you get together with him again... you know his family doesn't want you around either. It's hard to build a life together when you dislike the other's family.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,089 Member
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    I'd go for it. Tell him exactly how you feel. If he says he feels the same way then he will break it off with the other girl.
    If he doesn't immediately break it off with her then you'll have your answer. If he doesn't break up with her then move on and try to forget about him, at least you tried. If he does break up with her then go for it and give it a chance
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    edited July 2016
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    This is why I'm glad the internet wasn't a thing when I was a young lass.


    If he liked you, he'd be with you. Or at least be single and willing to put effort in. He doesn't love you -- his wants his cake and eat it too.

    Scrap up all the self respect you can muster, tell him you like him a lot - but he's involved with somebody else and NOT AVAILABLE. Stop seeing and communicating with this man until he is single or you have gotten over your feelings.
  • Rage_Phish
    Rage_Phish Posts: 1,508 Member
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    nah, go out and catch a buncha d and make him sorry

    easy peasy
  • queenofpuppies
    queenofpuppies Posts: 189 Member
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    if he has a girlfriend still he is jerking you around; keeping you on deck in case things go sour. It sounds like he wants to know he can have you without actually having to do anything to support the relationship. I would be asking "will he fight for you?" If he isn't even willing to cut this other girl lose then move on. It will be hard, and you may always have a squishy place for him in your heart, but you don't have to have drama to have love and you will find love again.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    meritage4 wrote: »
    Take a year overseas. He's history and let's face it-you weren't good together. Too much fighting and drama.

    Block him from your social media. quit calling him on his birthday and welcome the rest of your life.

    Seriously, think outside the small town you are in. Life if so much bigger then G+J

    Go discover who you actually are outside this dude.
  • Constant_Nova
    Constant_Nova Posts: 108 Member
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    In the words of Ida Mae from the movie ghost " you in danger girl!" or at least you will be if you fight for this dude. Any man that has respect for his self as well as women, would leave his current situation and take time to heal from it first- before moving on to a new situation. I read this to my Partner btw..... Our Advice- Fall far back and work on your self. if he truly cares about you, He will leave his current relationship and take time and then come find you.

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