Just a vent about stupid comments

2

Replies

  • blc1971
    blc1971 Posts: 170 Member
    I've gotten similar comments for the past 18+ months I've been in maintenance, although less the more time passes. I'm 5'6", about 140lbs, with a very slim/not curvey figure. Most recently, my mother in law (who is 89 years old and who I absolutely love!!) said that I don't need to work out because I'll blow away. She doesn't realize that working out is what keeps me slim and healthy...I'm not trying to lose more weight. Often things are said out of ignorance, but sometimes they are said out of jealousy because you are where they want to be. The rude and jealous stuff used to really tick me off, but I've started to consider the source and let things roll off. It's about them, not me. I think you look amazing, and as another commented, I'd love to go on vacation and have a beer with you!!
  • vixtris
    vixtris Posts: 688 Member
    edited July 2016
    I'm sorry you're being treated that way :( Is it your friends that are saying these things to you, or strangers? If its your friends, then they don't seem much like friends to me. If its strangers, have you noticed their appearance? Almost any time someone makes a comment to me about my weight, they're twice my size - and that only means they are jealous. Hell, I admit I get a little jealous when I see more fit women than me lol. I'm the same height as you and weigh 20 lbs less, I have yet to receive a comment that mean - and I would say I look more like a 12-year-old than you do (lets just say I have no curves on top). By looking at your picture, you absolutely do not look like you are 12. You look very fit and strong, and I admire that, and I know there are others out there who do, too.

    I'd also like to add that America has the highest rate of obesity than anywhere else in the world. Thin people are the minority, so we will be made fun of for it. But, us more fit folks will have the last laugh as those who make fun of you die from obesity related illnesses.
  • wi_maint_man
    wi_maint_man Posts: 99 Member
    As they say on the internet " Haters gonna hate"
  • jeanlake
    jeanlake Posts: 130 Member
    Any wonder why the world is in the mess it is? People can be heartless and mean. Especially if they hide behind a keyboard. Good news -- more good people than bad in the world. Give better than you get and you'll be alright. Have a great week. :)
  • CindyFooWho
    CindyFooWho Posts: 179 Member
    jenj1313 wrote: »
    You look fit and active to me, and given the setting and giant beer in your profile pic, I'd love to go on vacation with you! I understand that it can be hard to ignore stupid comments, but seriously... you look great! Don't let the haters get to you!

    That really was a giant beer, in Grand Cayman. Pretty heavy, too. Pic shows off my "beer lifting muscles."
  • STEVE142142
    STEVE142142 Posts: 867 Member
    CindyFooWho wrote: »
    jenj1313 wrote: »
    You look fit and active to me, and given the setting and giant beer in your profile pic, I'd love to go on vacation with you! I understand that it can be hard to ignore stupid comments, but seriously... you look great! Don't let the haters get to you!

    That really was a giant beer, in Grand Cayman. Pretty heavy, too. Pic shows off my "beer lifting muscles."

    You have very nice arm muscle tone. Without knowing your age or seeing the rest of you in a picture it's hard to tell but one of the things you have to remember is you don't fit into society's standard perception of what someone your age is supposed to look look like.

    What you have to remember is you're doing this for yourself and that's the only opinion you should be really concerned about. The positive compliments I say thank you the negative compliments I go okay whatever.

    All you have to do is spend the day at the beach or downtown people watching and see what the average person looks like. It's like the old Japanese proverb the nail that sticks out gets hammered down. Why you looking the way you do you take away their excuses and a lot of people can't deal with that
  • billglitch
    billglitch Posts: 538 Member
    i have talked to other women who get similar comments...usuall from women. maybe jealousy
  • dia77
    dia77 Posts: 410 Member
    You look awesome. Why do you care?
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    People come out with all sorts of pointless, mindless crap, in my experience. The fact that these people are family, friends, or people we like doesn't seem to make much difference alas.
  • griffinca2
    griffinca2 Posts: 672 Member
    I agree w/Amber and the other comments; some folks see you becoming healthier and taking care of yourself and want to make themselves feel better by putting you down. I'm 65 and lost 11 lbs last year by cutting back on overly processed food, watching my portion sizes and sugar intake (natural & added). I don't consider myself under weight (I'm 5'3"), but don't want to lose any more weight; overly skinny when you're older makes you look older. From what I can see of your pic, you don't look 12; I think they're just jealous.
  • girlgroves
    girlgroves Posts: 235 Member
    TerriRichardson112 wrote: »
    My reply to remarks like this is always to say, with a big smile, "Yes! Isn't it great! And I feel fabulous too! You should try it yourself!"

    I love this response - going to try this myself!
  • _sacar
    _sacar Posts: 80 Member
    CindyFooWho wrote: »
    the most recent one really kind of bothered me. It was "you look like a 12 year old." I'm sorry, was that at all supposed to be flattering? I look like a CHILD?

    That wasn't meant to be flattering. It's a crappy comment from a jealous person. "REAL women have CURVES blah blah blah"...

    I tell people I am changing my diet and use that as a reason that I can't go for pizza or eat five cupcakes or whatever, and even though I am still overweight, people go, "YOU'RE dieting? Come on." Like what do I need to look like for you to approve me bettering myself? Geez.

  • victoria_1024
    victoria_1024 Posts: 915 Member
    I get a lot of people telling me that I need to be done losing weight. The funny thing was people started in with those comments a long time ago when I was definitely still overweight. I lost 90 lbs though total so i think it was hard for people to get used to. Now that I'm on maintenance people still make those comments but it's weird because their weight goals are even less than mine, or they want to weigh the same as me but they are two inches taller. Yet I "need to be done"? Don't get it.
  • ptipton520
    ptipton520 Posts: 83 Member
    Smile sweetly and say "Thank you - I feel younger too."
  • lizzieloo934
    lizzieloo934 Posts: 57 Member
    I like to challenge comments like this in a casual manner.

    Asked with sincere curiosity "What do you mean by that?" If they are being a jerk then they will get embarrassed or stumble over their words trying to defend themselves and probably not make these comments again to you (yay) or more likely they will clarify what they mean which can be either a compliment or an ignorant belief. If the former you can either take it as a compliment or let them know (respectfully) that you don't appreciate it and why and if the latter you can have a genuine discussion about the misplaced belief ie that slim built woman aren't womanly. I find these discussions to be quite interesting and you both grow as a person!

    You are doing awesome! Keep it up!!
  • Wolfena
    Wolfena Posts: 1,570 Member
    I don't have time right this very minute to read everybody else's comments, and I agree that it stinks- and have also had to deal with rude statements from people that I love in the past regarding my weight / weight loss or eating or exercise habits.

    One suggestion I have to you is not to talk about it. Obviously the people around you who know you well are going to realize that you have lost weight or are a fitness fanatic, but the rest of the world does really not need to know about how often you run, how many calories you eat or how conscious you are of your body size, you know?? It's none of their business for one, and for two it just gives them the opportunity to voice their potentially rude opinions.

Categories