snide comments

I went to visit my friend at the bar she works at, and we were talking about the weight we were losing and how it stalls sometimes and just general stuff like that.

the guy sitting next to me chimed in and said "you girls are crazy. losing weight is EASY. if you don't find it easy, you're not trying hard enough"

i just kinda shot him a look and he back peddled a bit saying "it's all mental, you have to put your mind in the right place"

in return i said "a lot is mental, but if you've been big your whole life, how easy do you think it is?"
then he just kinda agreed with me and continued drinking his beer.

anyone else have rude comments from strangers? i know i've had the general "are you pregnant?" comments but this one kinda annoyed me more than that! lol
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Replies

  • irjeffb
    irjeffb Posts: 275 Member
    People are jerks sometimes. His comment was even self-contradictory. How could you not be trying hard enough if it's so easy?
  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
    Ya know the way he said it was incorrect, but what he told you is 100% correct (about it being all mental).
  • elkahallick
    elkahallick Posts: 1,138 Member
    I have a rule of thumb... Don't comment on my weight if you don't want me to comment on yours..
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    Ya know the way he said it was incorrect, but what he told you is 100% correct (about it being all mental).
    i totally agreed with him, but it was the way he said it.

    no manners, judgemental, contradictory. i didn't invite him into the conversation, and usually i get really uncomfortable talking about weight with strangers, but i really felt the need to make my point to him.
  • pluckabee
    pluckabee Posts: 346 Member
    If it isn't easy... you're not trying hard enough??? WTF?
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
    He's wrong and being a tool. It is simple, but it definitely is not easy.

    The head game is the challenge and if it was easy, everyone would do it.
  • Lesa_Sass
    Lesa_Sass Posts: 2,213 Member
    Umm, I think it has more to do with you were at a bar and he was drinking.

    I am a recovering alcoholic and I used to do that kind of crap when I was sitting at the bar. I would interject my "opinion" into others conversations whether they liked it or not. After all, I was there to help people. :laugh:
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
    "It's all mental... you just have to put your mind in the right place."

    Yes, because getting your mind in the right place is super easy. It's just like rearranging the furniture in your apartment, right? It's not like people have to deal with all the mental issues that were already there in the first place (many of which are exacerbated by dieting and weight loss). People who say stuff like that should be forced to live in my mind with my insecurities for a day while I'm off being awesome without them.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    People are jerks sometimes. His comment was even self-contradictory. How could you not be trying hard enough if it's so easy?
    lol i think he drank a little too much.
  • juliemouse83
    juliemouse83 Posts: 6,663 Member
    We can lose weight, but you can't fix stupid. (which, along with rude, is how I feel about the way the guy came across...)

    Yeah, it's mental, thank you, Mr. Obvious, now get out of our conversation. :angry:

    Some people act like they have no home training.
  • eleqtriq
    eleqtriq Posts: 76 Member
    People are jerks sometimes. His comment was even self-contradictory. How could you not be trying hard enough if it's so easy?

    Yup. ^^ This guy nailed it.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    Umm, I think it has more to do with you were at a bar and he was drinking.

    I am a recovering alcoholic and I used to do that kind of crap when I was sitting at the bar. I would interject my "opinion" into others conversations whether they liked it or not. After all, I was there to help people. :laugh:
    LOL
    i don't think i've ever done that. i know how badly things can turn out.
  • janegeraldine
    janegeraldine Posts: 20 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
  • Evilmuffin666
    Evilmuffin666 Posts: 132 Member
    I think of it this way..... I may be fat, but you are ugly... and I can diet!
  • darkguardian419
    darkguardian419 Posts: 1,302 Member
    Does it count when I paid people to walk up to a girl I know and ask her when she's due?

    In my defense, she deserved it...
  • Bajiggity
    Bajiggity Posts: 88 Member
    I get rude remarks all the time from co-workers telling me to eat a cheeseburger and I need to eat more. pfffft
  • agdyl
    agdyl Posts: 246 Member
    I know this woman who is probably 5'10" and maybe 105lbs - has apparently been rail thin her whole life. She was ranting on facebook about how lazy Americans are and how easy it is to lose weight - just eat moderately and do a little exercise!!!. (I can tell you that never worked for me...) But what made me mad was - what in the hell does she know about it? It is very annoying to have people who have no idea what you're going through belittle your efforts.

    I think it's a rare person who can declare any significant weight loss to be "easy" if they've actually done it themselves. I'm sure there are a few, but most people who claim it to be easy are just reading about it in a book and telling you that it sounds easy from an academic standpoint. Just because it's not rocket science doesn't mean it doesn't take a lot of hard work and determination.
  • iamkass
    iamkass Posts: 122 Member
    People are jerks sometimes. His comment was even self-contradictory. How could you not be trying hard enough if it's so easy?

    He probably meant it's an easy concept. Because it is! You need to burn more energy than you eat; easy! Of course, actually doing it requires hard work. I work hard at the gym and but I would agree that with the right mindset I don't feel like it's hard, especially when you get into a routine. It's just becomes life at that point. When people ask me how I'm losing the weight I don't go "ugh, it's sooo hard. I'm eating right and going to the gym 4-5 times a week". I say "I'm watching what I eat and working out. It's that simple". And I plan to continue doing the same thing once I'm at maintenance.. Changing your lifestyle is hard, but once it's changed it just becomes life.

    He may have said it a rude way, but I don't think the actual remark is rude or snide.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
    my family celebrates every single pound or half-pound i lose with me. i surround myself with uplifting, supportive, positive people.
    my issue is this guy didn't once think that hey, maybe, JUST maybe i really don't need his opinion on my personal conversation.
    and i don't need him telling me how easy it is when i've been stalled for about 2-3 weeks (which i found out is due to an ulcer/bloating)
  • sugboog29
    sugboog29 Posts: 630 Member
    You can fix your weight....he can't fix his stupid!!
  • antdogs
    antdogs Posts: 191 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
    my family celebrates every single pound or half-pound i lose with me. i surround myself with uplifting, supportive, positive people.
    my issue is this guy didn't once think that hey, maybe, JUST maybe i really don't need his opinion on my personal conversation.
    and i don't need him telling me how easy it is when i've been stalled for about 2-3 weeks (which i found out is due to an ulcer/bloating)

    was he a big guy ?
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    People are jerks sometimes. His comment was even self-contradictory. How could you not be trying hard enough if it's so easy?

    He probably meant it's an easy concept. Because it is! You need to burn more energy than you eat; easy! Of course, actually doing it requires hard work. I work hard at the gym and but I would agree that with the right mindset I don't feel like it's hard, especially when you get into a routine. It's just becomes life at that point. When people ask me how I'm losing the weight I don't go "ugh, it's sooo hard. I'm eating right and going to the gym 4-5 times a week". I say "I'm watching what I eat and working out. It's that simple". And I plan to continue doing the same thing once I'm at maintenance.. Changing your lifestyle is hard, but once it's changed it just becomes life.

    He may have said it a rude way, but I don't think the actualy remark is rude or snide.
    yeah i agree with you. i must be living in my own little bubble, because i can never seem to get used to rude people.
  • born2drum
    born2drum Posts: 731 Member
    I went to visit my friend at the bar she works at, and we were talking about the weight we were losing and how it stalls sometimes and just general stuff like that.

    the guy sitting next to me chimed in and said "you girls are crazy. losing weight is EASY. if you don't find it easy, you're not trying hard enough"

    i just kinda shot him a look and he back peddled a bit saying "it's all mental, you have to put your mind in the right place"

    in return i said "a lot is mental, but if you've been big your whole life, how easy do you think it is?"
    then he just kinda agreed with me and continued drinking his beer.

    anyone else have rude comments from strangers? i know i've had the general "are you pregnant?" comments but this one kinda annoyed me more than that! lol

    Unfortunately, he was right. It's mental. How you feel is most of the time mental. At the end of the day, you either lose weight or you dont. It's a choice. Thus, mental. Simple, lol.

    Not really lol but still.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
    my family celebrates every single pound or half-pound i lose with me. i surround myself with uplifting, supportive, positive people.
    my issue is this guy didn't once think that hey, maybe, JUST maybe i really don't need his opinion on my personal conversation.
    and i don't need him telling me how easy it is when i've been stalled for about 2-3 weeks (which i found out is due to an ulcer/bloating)

    was he a big guy ?
    he was very skinny, no muscle. he was about mid 40's and he looked kinda not well put together.
  • born2drum
    born2drum Posts: 731 Member
    I have a rule of thumb... Don't comment on my weight if you don't want me to comment on yours..

    LOL this guy knows what's up!

    Do you even lift, though? lol (love that line, damn bro lines)
  • socajam
    socajam Posts: 2,530 Member
    Ya know the way he said it was incorrect, but what he told you is 100% correct (about it being all mental).

    I agree with you and him. It was just the way he said. But losing weight is all mental. You have to be in the right frame of mind, be focused and really want the change. It is not something one can go into half heartedly, otherwise you are going fail.
  • garber6th
    garber6th Posts: 1,890 Member
    People can be d!cks. It's amazing to me how many people have something to say and advice to give now that I am losing weight, when they didn't have a word to say to me before. Also, the old saying is true - nobody wants unasked for advice.

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  • socajam
    socajam Posts: 2,530 Member
    I went to visit my friend at the bar she works at, and we were talking about the weight we were losing and how it stalls sometimes and just general stuff like that.

    the guy sitting next to me chimed in and said "you girls are crazy. losing weight is EASY. if you don't find it easy, you're not trying hard enough"

    i just kinda shot him a look and he back peddled a bit saying "it's all mental, you have to put your mind in the right place"

    in return i said "a lot is mental, but if you've been big your whole life, how easy do you think it is?"
    then he just kinda agreed with me and continued drinking his beer.

    anyone else have rude comments from strangers? i know i've had the general "are you pregnant?" comments but this one kinda annoyed me more than that! lol

    Unfortunately, he was right. It's mental. How you feel is most of the time mental. At the end of the day, you either lose weight or you dont. It's a choice. Thus, mental. Simple, lol.

    Not really lol but still.

    People are really missing the point. Everything one does is mental. Was he right to butt in probably not, but as the end of the day, get over it and move on. I have friends who can see that I have lost weight, refuse to congratulate me, does it bother me of course not. My goal is the next time we meet up, I plan to be at least double what I have lost now. People need to start using negative comments (especially concerning weight loss) and turn them into a positive, life is too short to be harping over something that is not going to enhance your life.
  • socajam
    socajam Posts: 2,530 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
    my family celebrates every single pound or half-pound i lose with me. i surround myself with uplifting, supportive, positive people.
    my issue is this guy didn't once think that hey, maybe, JUST maybe i really don't need his opinion on my personal conversation.
    and i don't need him telling me how easy it is when i've been stalled for about 2-3 weeks (which i found out is due to an ulcer/bloating)

    was he a big guy ?
    he was very skinny, no muscle. he was about mid 40's and he looked kinda not well put together.

    That was your opinion of him and he gave you his opinion on losing weight. I bet if you told him the above he might be offended, but cannot do anything about it.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    It seems as if he maybe meant that if you are doing everything right and working hard at it, then the weight comes off easily, which in general seems to be true. It isn't "easy" to stay in the mental place that yields results, but if you stay there, the weight loss itself isn't that hard.

    Why get worked up over someone who is inconsequential to you? People will always have obnoxious opinions, even your friends and family, and definitely people on this website. But if you know you are doing everything right, what someone else says doesn't matter. Just nod and smirk to yourself that you know you you are doing the right things while someone else is still stuck in the negative phase.
    my family celebrates every single pound or half-pound i lose with me. i surround myself with uplifting, supportive, positive people.
    my issue is this guy didn't once think that hey, maybe, JUST maybe i really don't need his opinion on my personal conversation.
    and i don't need him telling me how easy it is when i've been stalled for about 2-3 weeks (which i found out is due to an ulcer/bloating)

    was he a big guy ?
    he was very skinny, no muscle. he was about mid 40's and he looked kinda not well put together.

    That was your opinion of him and he gave you his opinion on losing weight. I bet if you told him the above he might be offended, but cannot do anything about it.
    but the difference is i didn't tell him what i thought?