RANT. Everyones A Weight Loss Expert

2

Replies

  • mdhummel
    mdhummel Posts: 201 Member
    I'm guessing they are just jealous that you have the self control to only eat half of the burger. Good for you by knowing you can indulge in moderation. Your friends probably have no clue how many calories and fat is in the burger. My mother-in-law always gives me her two cents on dieting. I just smile, nod and tell her thank you.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    when people give me 'advice' like that, i say "yeah, i know."

    "why are you eating an avocado? it has a lot of fat in it."
    "yeah, i know."

    "thats a big hamburger. you must be off your diet."
    "yeah, i know."

    "that much running can't be good for you."
    "yeah, i know."

    "you worry too much about what you eat."
    "yeah, i know."
  • K_Serz
    K_Serz Posts: 1,299 Member
    I went to dinner at PF Changs once. I attempted to order something off of the gluten free menu. The *kitten* server refused to let me order it because he told me that I didnt need it. Yes there was a short and awkward discussion about it. Luckily I was out with 5-6 other associates and didnt want any problems.

    (sans debate over gluten free) Its irrelevant whether I needed it or not. Im a frigging paying customer and its on the menu. Bring it to me now before I Ginsu your face! His tip was $0 /ENDRANT :drinker:
  • jonward85
    jonward85 Posts: 534 Member
    Not much you can do or say in response to telling you that you need fat when you're clearly getting it from half a hamburger. Just ignore it or change the subject. I hate talking about fitness and exercise with friends as I don't want to make people who do absolutely nothing feel bad, but at the same time I don't need their input either. It's about as much fun as talking about religion or politics.



    This
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    when people give me 'advice' like that, i say "yeah, i know."

    "why are you eating an avocado? it has a lot of fat in it."
    "yeah, i know."

    "thats a big hamburger. you must be off your diet."
    "yeah, i know."

    "that much running can't be good for you."
    "yeah, i know."

    "you worry too much about what you eat."
    "yeah, i know."

    :laugh:

    i read that with so much sarcasm.
  • jen_zz
    jen_zz Posts: 1,011 Member
    when people give me 'advice' like that, i say "yeah, i know."

    "why are you eating an avocado? it has a lot of fat in it."
    "yeah, i know."

    "thats a big hamburger. you must be off your diet."
    "yeah, i know."

    "that much running can't be good for you."
    "yeah, i know."

    "you worry too much about what you eat."
    "yeah, i know."

    I do something similar. For anything they think I should do or shouldn't do, I just go "oh!" or "mmhmm!" with a smile that I try my best to fake.:glasses:
  • icimani
    icimani Posts: 1,454 Member
    I usualy don't have that problem with friends or colleagues but I have one sister who is always telling me what I should do. Now, I've lost almost 100 pounds in the last few years and she's gained a LOT of weight in the same amount of time so I have a hard time listening to her weight loss advice.

    On the other hand, we all know what we have to do right? Getting motivated and actually DOING it is another thing!
  • TriciaB04
    TriciaB04 Posts: 9 Member
    You are so right. And it's not just diet and nutrition. Everyone is an expert on everything it seems. A person that knows how to listen and understand is a rare and wonderful thing. Good for you that you stuck to your plan and enjoyed your meal. I'm surprised all the expertise at the table didn't give you heartburn,
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    Not much you can do or say in response to telling you that you need fat when you're clearly getting it from half a hamburger. Just ignore it or change the subject. I hate talking about fitness and exercise with friends as I don't want to make people who do absolutely nothing feel bad, but at the same time I don't need their input either. It's about as much fun as talking about religion or politics.

    exactly. it wasn't like i was eating a handful of carrots for dinner. half of that burger alone was almost 400 calories!! :noway:
  • NatureChik1985
    NatureChik1985 Posts: 79
    I genuinely don't think it is jealously (I think too many people jump to that conclusion on here). I would say since it is your family they probably feel that they can be more open and honest because you are family. My guess is they don't even know it bothers you.
  • Amerielle
    Amerielle Posts: 153 Member
    I never have anyone say a word about what I do or don't eat. Do you talk about losing weight with people?

    In the future if you plan to eat half get a to go box along with your meal so you can cut the burger in half right when you get it. If asked, tell people you want to save half for later because it's so big or you aren't too hungry or whatever. Also bonus: you get to enjoy the rest for lunch tomorrow!

    I don't say a thing. They always ask me every week how I did at my weigh in. I don't volunteer information unless asked. I actually find it uncomfortable.

    But see, here is my point. You must have talked about it because otherwise people wouldn't ask how your weigh in went. I must just be much more private than most people because nobody I know even knows that I weigh in. None of their business.

    I like the "Fine, how is your weight this week" response. Really asking about your weigh in is just so rude that it doesn't deserve politeness in return. Set your boundaries now before this becomes a lifetime of intrusiveness.

    By the way, I hope your weigh in went well! :smile:
  • cruzcrzyMarie
    cruzcrzyMarie Posts: 251 Member
    I agree. It is annoying, especially when the advice givers are overweight. HELLO, I've lost the weight, maintained for over a year, and know what I am doing!
  • Melissa22G
    Melissa22G Posts: 847 Member
    Just keep on, keepin' on.

    Unfortunately, you can't catch a break. There's a lot of experts on the forums too :wink:
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    I never have anyone say a word about what I do or don't eat. Do you talk about losing weight with people?

    In the future if you plan to eat half get a to go box along with your meal so you can cut the burger in half right when you get it. If asked, tell people you want to save half for later because it's so big or you aren't too hungry or whatever. Also bonus: you get to enjoy the rest for lunch tomorrow!

    I don't say a thing. They always ask me every week how I did at my weigh in. I don't volunteer information unless asked. I actually find it uncomfortable.

    But see, here is my point. You must have talked about it because otherwise people wouldn't ask how your weigh in went. I must just be much more private than most people because nobody I know even knows that I weigh in. None of their business.

    I like the "Fine, how is your weight this week" response. Really asking about your weigh in is just so rude that it doesn't deserve politeness in return. Set your boundaries now before this becomes a lifetime of intrusiveness.

    By the way, I hope your weigh in went well! :smile:

    They know I go to support meetings, friends of theirs go. But yes, I agree asking about weigh ins are a little uncalled for. The weigh in went great. :)
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Not much you can do or say in response to telling you that you need fat when you're clearly getting it from half a hamburger.

    This was my thought too. Did they think all the fat was in the half not eaten? :huh:

    I don't know where the burger was from, but if it was from a restaurant, rather than a tiny fast food burger, half was likely plenty.
  • coke_bottle
    coke_bottle Posts: 259 Member
    Yesterday a few of us went out for supper. I ordered a burger & fries , cut the burger & half and only ate half of it. (because i knew how many calories were in it & planned what i was going to eat before going out) I was trying to eat slowly, giving myself time to enjoy the treat & give myself time to feel full. I was asked "aren't you going to eat" & I replied that I was trying not to eat the whole serving on my plate. Then I get a "your body needs fats, cause if not anything that you will eat is going to turn into fat if you don't get enough" :laugh: It annoys the hell out of me how everyone is a "weight loss expert". By cutting that burger in half I cut my calories in half & was still able to enjoy a treat within my calories... I wasn't trying to starve myself! Everyone needs to stick they're nose in & tell me what I should & shouldn't do. & then have the guts to ask me how much I ate today like I'm some kind of anorexic. I'm a grown *kitten* woman, I can eat what I want. I am in no way starving myself, I'm just learning & teaching myself moderation.. the thing I lacked before getting fat. I really don't think people realize how many calories they are suppose to have a day & how many calories are in a meal. If you don't know everything ,stop acting like it!! :explode:


    100% AGREED!
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    Just keep on, keepin' on.

    Unfortunately, you can't catch a break. There's a lot of experts on the forums too :wink:

    Yes, they're the ones who scared me off of trying to lose weight here in the first place. Now I'm back & doing things my way.
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    Not much you can do or say in response to telling you that you need fat when you're clearly getting it from half a hamburger.

    This was my thought too. Did they think all the fat was in the half not eaten? :huh:

    lmao. :laugh: really though.
  • VorJoshigan
    VorJoshigan Posts: 1,106 Member
    How did you respond? Maybe they're idiots who don't understand that that is rude. You can't expect any better unless you give them feedback on their behavior.

    I know this is a rant and you don't want constructive feedback, but I can't help myself so here are some ideas:

    Print out your pre-logged diary and show them how this fits in with your eating plan. Flood them with so much information that they regret ever having asked.

    Ask them to tell you about how they obtained their wight loss expertise. Ask them what techniques they used and how they are doing at maintenance. Pump them for so much information they regret opening their mouth.

    Stare at them with a raised eyebrow until they look away and ignore the comment.
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    I guess you could have helpful coworkers like I do. One day we were having cake for someone's birthday. I knew I was working that afternoon and could fit the cake into my calories for the day, so when they asked if I wanted a slice, I said yes. The person cutting the cake cut my slice and then proceeded to scrape all of the frosting off because she thought I didn't need it. I told her to put my damn frosting BACK ON MY CAKE! LOL
  • CBrook04
    CBrook04 Posts: 107
    I guess you could have helpful coworkers like I do. One day we were having cake for someone's birthday. I knew I was working that afternoon and could fit the cake into my calories for the day, so when they asked if I wanted a slice, I said yes. The person cutting the cake cut my slice and then proceeded to scrape all of the frosting off because she thought I didn't need it. I told her to put my damn frosting BACK ON MY CAKE! LOL

    WOW! How do people even get the nerve to do things like that?!
  • juliemouse83
    juliemouse83 Posts: 6,663 Member
    Don't feel alone in this, LOL...

    My dad, whom I adore, flipped when he found out I lift heavy, so I really freaked him out when I told him I'd deadlifted 140 lbs the night before. "You don't need to be lifting all that weight. It's not good for you." This was about a month ago...

    huh? :laugh:

    So the other night we were talking on the phone and I was explaining how I slept wrong and tweaked my neck and he tells me to stop ANY kind of exercise for the next week or two, and I'm like, "Nooooo, I CAN'T not exercise...I stay hungry as it is!" And he tells me... //sigh// "Cut out all your carbs and you'll be fine...

    So I just said, "Ok, dad...I'll do that." and that shut it down right there. Of course, he lives on the other coast so he won't know, but, bless his heart...his idea of healthy living is cutting carbs, eating lots of steak and veggies, and going for leisurely walks. :laugh:

    But I love him and respect him, and know that I won't win an argument with him, anyway, so I smile, nod, and humor him so he doesn't worry.
  • cookiealbright
    cookiealbright Posts: 605 Member
    I've been watching my weight all my life. When I was younger my co-workers (most who were overweight) used to call me Anorexic Annie becasue I would have yogurt & fruit for lunch instead of a burger or hoagie. You are doing the right thing! Mindless eating isn't good. My husband and I are going to Red Lobster tonight and I'm having a baked potato with butter - TODAY...not today and tormorrow. But I'm not having my favorite coconut shrimp because I'm having the baked potato & butter - it's a choice. I know there will be more coconut shrimp, but I don't have to try to eat it every time I eat! Good job in your good choice! By the way...my mother-in-law is always trying to get me to eat something that I don't want to..she knows I like bread, but if I'm not eating it that day she says "Why aren't you eating bread, you like bread?" Gotta love the in-laws!! :flowerforyou:
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    when people give me 'advice' like that, i say "yeah, i know."

    "why are you eating an avocado? it has a lot of fat in it."
    "yeah, i know."

    "thats a big hamburger. you must be off your diet."
    "yeah, i know."

    "that much running can't be good for you."
    "yeah, i know."

    "you worry too much about what you eat."
    "yeah, i know."

    :laugh:

    i read that with so much sarcasm.

    oh, it's said with a lot of sarcasm too.
  • IAteBethDitto
    IAteBethDitto Posts: 98 Member
    Yeah, this sort of discussion is all about power relations. It's the same on the forums here. I think the "I know" response is the best one for stopping it!
  • NumbrsNerd
    NumbrsNerd Posts: 202 Member
    Definitely know what you mean :explode: :explode:

    ..but I guess just don't let them get to you. It's hard to follow your plan when you've got people around you saying stuff like

    "just one bite!" (which then turns into 20 'bites')
    "gain some weight!" (when you just lost 30lbs)
    "are you sure your not anorexic" & *from my mother!* "I hope your not bulimic" (came out of nowhere)

    1) It hurts. People really don't know what it's like to struggle through a weight loss & they are undermining everything you've worked for.

    2) It's none of their business, especially when your doing the right thing by being healthier!

    3) Again, don't let it get to you! Stick it out and be a healthy YOU.

    :heart: :heart: :drinker: :drinker: :heart: :heart:

    Oh my goodness! Nail on the head with my #1 annoyance: those who think SELF CONTROL equates an eating disorder. Just because you scarfed a whole mega burger and I didn't, and I made you feel bad about your choices through no fault of my own doesn't mean you need to accuse me of having an eating disorder. Yes, I've lost A LOT of weight, but I'm still overweight for Pete's sake!

    eta: wording was f'd up
  • sammniamii
    sammniamii Posts: 669 Member
    Remarkably, few have tried to offer me "advice". I get more people asking me what I've done & what they should. I TRY to explain that what works for me may not be best for them, then offer some suggestions (even to my friend who is lifting w/ me). I try NOT to be "that person".
  • NumbrsNerd
    NumbrsNerd Posts: 202 Member
    when people give me 'advice' like that, i say "yeah, i know."

    "why are you eating an avocado? it has a lot of fat in it."
    "yeah, i know."

    "thats a big hamburger. you must be off your diet."
    "yeah, i know."

    "that much running can't be good for you."
    "yeah, i know."

    "you worry too much about what you eat."
    "yeah, i know."

    May I please steal this approach??? :flowerforyou:
  • Pierced
    Pierced Posts: 36 Member
    My peeve is when people ask you how you have lost the weight and you tell them what you have done, and you get the response oh I could never cut the carbs, sugars, white flour, processed foods etc. No matter what it is all you get is the negative. Then they go on to what you should be doing, eating or cutting out of your diet. My response is well you have to do what works for you. This is my journey, and that's what I have done, good luck on yours. Seems to shut them up real fast.
  • pepperpat64
    pepperpat64 Posts: 423 Member
    You know, I think it's a little bit of jealousy/guilt on the part of the other person. They are sitting there wolfing down several hundred (or even a thousand) calories with their burger, and you're eating half the portion. You've got the willpower and they don't. I know this because I used to be that way a little bit. A friend of mine was losing weight really fast on the South Beach Diet. I tried it, but it wasn't for me long-term. I love my carbs and I enjoy food in general. So when this friend would refuse all the baked goodies I brought in to work, even one little bite, I was kind of jealous and hurt. Now I know that each person has to find his/her own way and you're not really being a good friend when you put down others' choices. The best thing to do when someone is offering their weight loss "expertise" is to thank them for their concern and advice, and then keep doing whatever you're doing right. :bigsmile:

    South Beach isn't a zero-carb or even low-carb diet, and every food that can be eaten on it is highly enjoyable. In fact, there are very few foods that are forbidden to begin with. I don't understand why this myth persists that it's a very limited diet.

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