Food For Thought: There's Not One Right Way

ashleyisgreat

You're all making me blush. :blushing:

schmidty13

Well said, what a great post and absolutely right. Everyone has a difference of opinions and there are people on these forums that can be extremely rude in my experience on this site for just a week. It has been very interesting replying on these forums and not a very pleasant one. I think these forums should be more about encouragement and support, and less attacking when someone has an opinion you might disagree with.

Do you think bull **** should not be corrected....just rainbows and ponies and whatevs, as long as we all get along....

There is opinion and there is fact...you have to know the difference. If someone is giving a completely nonfactual, bull**** opinion...pretty much every vet on this forum is going to call them on it. There's bro-science and then there's science. When you don't call bull**** when calling bull**** is warranted...well, that's the exact opposite of true support.

Yup.

eautrey124

I've been here for about a month now, but I'm not new to weight loss and I am certainly not new to the basic techniques of research, reading, and learning. What comes across as "mean" or as "bullying" on MFP is often just a total lack of tolerance for idiocy. People come on here day in and day out and post stupid things, and obviously they are going to get reamed for it. Should they? ABSO-****ING-LUTELY. Why should we tolerate stupidity, misinformation, and broscience on a site designed for health and fitness advice/support/motivation? Sometimes people do deserved to get torn apart for propagating dumb ideas. Occasionally it might even inspire someone to read something from a trusted source and learn who was right--the OP or the bullies. If you can't understand that, then you should find yourself a place that can and will tolerate ignorance. Or maybe just stick to the success threads, where it's nice and cozy (well...except for the "clean eating" thread....don't go there either because it might hurt your feelings).

I'm not saying we don't need to correct those who are propagating false facts. But, if they are doing it out of ignorance, as in a lack of knowledge, then maybe it would be better to inform them, and not rip them apart. If I were to use this process when trying to help any misinformed or unknowledgeable, it wouldn't really help them learn. For example, my brother recently asked for help on factions because he was doing it wrong... Should I just say "You're stupid. They are fractions. Not that diffictult, idiot." No. I am not expecting a world of rainbows and ponies. I don't expect everyone to agree with me, but I just want to encourage people to give criticism in a more tactful way than some of the ways I've seen demonstrated in these forums.

schmidty13

This thread is a perfect example of the OP point.

I don't think my original response warranted any of the negative responses it received

Well said, what a great post and absolutely right. Everyone has a difference of opinions and there are people on these forums that can be extremely rude in my experience on this site for just a week. It has been very interesting replying on these forums and not a very pleasant one. I think these forums should be more about encouragement and support, and less attacking when someone has an opinion you might disagree with.

its just another example of how these threads get completely derailed by others, I simply agreed with the Original Posters comment. Some will never grasp the concept that what they view as fact is actually just their opinion.

And just as many have difficulty understanding why their opinions get hammered around here when they are put up against fact. Fact vs opinion, the win will always go to the fact.

delaniecastillo

Nice sentiments, I think you had the best of intentions and people can be dogmatic. But what I tend to see when things get nutso on here isn't one person demanding that another subscribes completely to their lifestyle and choices. It goes more like this:

OP: Help! I'm struggling with (issue)

Respondent: Okay, well (requests for more information)

OP: (elaborates)

Respondent: Okay you might want to (suggestion)

OP: But (reason that's unacceptable)

Respondent: But what you're doing now isn't effective because (reasons)

OP: Not everyone is the same

Respondent: But you asked for help because (thing) isn't working

OP: Bully

Third Person: Yeah Bully

Crazy Person: I've never had that problem, always been slim.

Fourth Person: (defends Respondent)

Fifth Person: IN

Respondent: (posts gif)

OP posts second thread about how mean people are.




A lot of people here ask questions they don't want the answers to.

A. This is the truth. People ask questions and then add things like "I don't want to be told to eat more" "Don't tell me to do more/less of..." "I want nutrition advice, not advice on how much to eat." "I'm not going to stop working out a million hours a day so..." And it's just like....well why bother? Do you really want help, or do you want people to back you up and make you feel good about your choices?

B. I'm person 5 and I suddenly feel very exposed....

oooh, I'll be the giffer!

brower47

Nice sentiments, I think you had the best of intentions and people can be dogmatic. But what I tend to see when things get nutso on here isn't one person demanding that another subscribes completely to their lifestyle and choices. It goes more like this:

OP: Help! I'm struggling with (issue)

Respondent: Okay, well (requests for more information)

OP: (elaborates)

Respondent: Okay you might want to (suggestion)

OP: But (reason that's unacceptable)

Respondent: But what you're doing now isn't effective because (reasons)

OP: Not everyone is the same

Respondent: But you asked for help because (thing) isn't working

OP: Bully

Third Person: Yeah Bully

Crazy Person: I've never had that problem, always been slim.

Fourth Person: (defends Respondent)

Fifth Person: IN

Respondent: (posts gif)

OP posts second thread about how mean people are.




A lot of people here ask questions they don't want the answers to.

This multiplied by a googaplex!!!!!!!!!!

VeinsAndBones

Man the forums are filled with rustled jimmies today! Ain't it great?

liftingheavy1

I've been here for about a month now, but I'm not new to weight loss and I am certainly not new to the basic techniques of research, reading, and learning. What comes across as "mean" or as "bullying" on MFP is often just a total lack of tolerance for idiocy. People come on here day in and day out and post stupid things, and obviously they are going to get reamed for it. Should they? ABSO-****ING-LUTELY. Why should we tolerate stupidity, misinformation, and broscience on a site designed for health and fitness advice/support/motivation? Sometimes people do deserved to get torn apart for propagating dumb ideas. Occasionally it might even inspire someone to read something from a trusted source and learn who was right--the OP or the bullies. If you can't understand that, then you should find yourself a place that can and will tolerate ignorance. Or maybe just stick to the success threads, where it's nice and cozy (well...except for the "clean eating" thread....don't go there either because it might hurt your feelings).

must be so nice to be above above the fray, and be so omnipotent. ok you did your brownnosing good job.

ashleyisgreat

I've been here for about a month now, but I'm not new to weight loss and I am certainly not new to the basic techniques of research, reading, and learning. What comes across as "mean" or as "bullying" on MFP is often just a total lack of tolerance for idiocy. People come on here day in and day out and post stupid things, and obviously they are going to get reamed for it. Should they? ABSO-****ING-LUTELY. Why should we tolerate stupidity, misinformation, and broscience on a site designed for health and fitness advice/support/motivation? Sometimes people do deserved to get torn apart for propagating dumb ideas. Occasionally it might even inspire someone to read something from a trusted source and learn who was right--the OP or the bullies. If you can't understand that, then you should find yourself a place that can and will tolerate ignorance. Or maybe just stick to the success threads, where it's nice and cozy (well...except for the "clean eating" thread....don't go there either because it might hurt your feelings).

must be so nice to be above above the fray, and be so omnipotent. ok you did your brownnosing good job.

How does brown-nosing on the internet work, exactly? I want explicit details.

cmeiron

I've been here for about a month now, but I'm not new to weight loss and I am certainly not new to the basic techniques of research, reading, and learning. What comes across as "mean" or as "bullying" on MFP is often just a total lack of tolerance for idiocy. People come on here day in and day out and post stupid things, and obviously they are going to get reamed for it. Should they? ABSO-****ING-LUTELY. Why should we tolerate stupidity, misinformation, and broscience on a site designed for health and fitness advice/support/motivation? Sometimes people do deserved to get torn apart for propagating dumb ideas. Occasionally it might even inspire someone to read something from a trusted source and learn who was right--the OP or the bullies. If you can't understand that, then you should find yourself a place that can and will tolerate ignorance. Or maybe just stick to the success threads, where it's nice and cozy (well...except for the "clean eating" thread....don't go there either because it might hurt your feelings).

You. I like you.

Same

Me three.

likitisplit

I think some of the posts could be more tolerant - I've seen people get called on stuff when they really are just that ignorant. I post a list of healthy foods to add calories regularly - copy and paste it - and each time I do, I get at least 2 PMs thanking me. However, I see a lot of stupidity - for example arguing with people like Sarauk. You get somebody like that giving you insight, you thank them even if you aren't ready for their advice.

MissyBenj

It's saddening to see that within the first page people are already trying to argue with such an innocent, uplifting post. It further proves the points that you've made. Thank you for posting this! It's incredibly positive, and if people take the time to absorb it rather than pick it apart to argue it, it may go a long way

It is odd, what I read as discussing, you read as arguing. Isn't it weird how that works?

The beauty of the internet.

Azurastar

Thanks so much for posting this. I was just reading through a forum and was appalled with the way some people treat each other. It started with a simple question and ended with so many post attacking the poor girl. It's a shame when someone comes for support they are ridiculed and judged. Makes me not want to post anything, for fear of being made out like an idiot. So thanks again for putting this out there:)