"The Time to Make Fun of the Fat Girl...
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i have about 150 pounds to lose. my friend about the same size as me got me into going to the gym with her. its the first time i have ever gone to a gym......i didnt realize how big i really am until yesterday. i have been doing different classes with my friend; Zumba, zumba tone, step and abs and last night we did a weight llifting class. my heart broke in the middle of class. it was very hard for me to continue. i watched myself in the mirror and realized how big i actually am. i was embarassed and surrounded by very fit girls. if my friend wasnt with me i probably would have left. i appreciate your post and i will pretend that everyone is thinking that way. i also try to think that if someone is judging me on my weight then they are just an *kitten* and i dont want to get to know them annyways0
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True. But people will make fun of fat people in public, harsh comments whispered under breaths -- both girls and guys, because people are inherently kind, but also inherently insensitive. The point of this post was to express my belief that the same people that make fun of a fat person Downtown at a club/restaurant, will not make fun of them in the gym.Very well put. I don't think that there is ever a time to make fun of the fat girl because of her weight. Now if she is a terrible person who judges others, that is an entirely different matter. Just don't make fun of her weight.
Men and women are equally cruel. It's a shame that people are so quick to judge others or deem themselves superior.
The gym is an area of commonality. Go. Go because you should. Go because you are safe. Go. You are accepted. You are cheered, not jeered. You are pushed forward. Go.0 -
Now I feel better about going to the gym!0
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nice post.0
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Great post. Im new to the area, hell, Im still fairly new to the country (USA) and I joined a gym close to my job. Im still shy when I go to workout. I just put my headphones on and ipod and just keep my head down when I work out. I'm definitely embarrassed about how I look when I work out but I need to work out to change how I look. Im sure people are watching me jiggle as I walk on the treadmills and cycle but I dont really care. My gym is run by a hospital so I get a free personal training session every 8 weeks to change up my routine and to show me how to use the machines. The thing Im more anxious about is approaching the free weights. I have some bicep curls with dumbells in my routine but for some reason Im embarrased to go over to the weight section and sometime skip that part of my workout all together :frown: :indifferent:
I started out really nervous about venturing into free weights, but in 4 months of lifting no one has ever been anything but nice or indifferent to me. And the changes to my body have been worth getting over my fears. Just do it. Maybe get a friend to go with you. You won't regret it.
It is normal to feel nervous. When I started I think I was 225 pounds, not sure because I didnt get on the scale for years....could have been more. The first time I went in I honestly sat in the women's locker room afraid to go out there. I didnt like what I saw in the mirror.
Then I said Self! Just do it.
and I did...and then did it again.0 -
That is exactly why I have avoided the gym. I've been hiding in my apartment doing work out videos because I'm embarrassed of what people will think watching me try to figure out my way around the gym. Eventually I'll get there. Until then I have 30 day shred and Insanity to get me by.0
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Wish I could say this was true, but at my gym (I live on a military base in Okinawa, Japan) it is a bunch of super fit military members. The only overweight people you see are middle aged men. Plus, the gym is ALWAYS packed...I even tried going at 2 AM and there were 30 some odd people there giving me weird looks for hogging up their weights. I have to go run/walk at the track when it is 108 degrees because no one else is dumb enough to go out and do it.0
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I love your post, OP, and couldn't agree more. I've often said on here that if someone is new to the gym and has questions, to not be afraid of those that are working out and in great shape. I've found my gyms to be very supportive places with people quite wiling to share advice or a spot. Of course the advice is sometimes great and sometimes not so great, but the sentiment is definitely there.0
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Weighing over 300 lbs, I was hesitant to go to the gym. I thought people would make fun of me or judge me. Then I realized, it's where I want to be and need to be, and if anyone wants to make fun of me, I can't really stop them from wasting their time like that. The more I go, the more people recognize me and are friendlier to me, and one super nice man even took the time to show me how to use some of the machines.
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This post reminds me of this post on the Flintland Blog:
http://flintland.blogspot.com/2012/05/hey-fat-girl.html
Also, I agree. If anyone had made fun of me my first month at the gym over a year and a half ago, I would have probably gone home and felt sh*tty about myself. The first year or so I gymmed it up, I purposely went during less trafficked time just to avoid people and their judgements only recently have I actually felt any sense of belonging there.0 -
I just hope the majority of people agree and believe.Could not have said it better myself!! We are all there for a common purpose, to get fit and healthy and meet our goals....just like here on MFP.
Thanks for this post, it helps!
I know I agree and I have felt the exact same things0 -
I think this is a lovely sentiment and I hope it's what most people think.
However every time there's one of those gym rant threads, I suspect that people are more judgmental than that. I've made my peace with the fact that I am likely being judged while I'm at the gym. I just try to remind myself that I shouldn't let other people control whether or not I reach my goals, and I go anyway.
The only thing someone looking at you at the gym should think is "Wow, she has an amazing rear! What can I do to look like that?!" You've made amazing progress, and I know that emotionally dealing with the very public space that is the gym is part of it.
:flowerforyou:
OP: it was a wonderful post. While I'm no longer one of the largest, new people at the gym, I remember the feeling. It can be a pretty daunting hurdle.0 -
I think this is a lovely sentiment and I hope it's what most people think.
However every time there's one of those gym rant threads, I suspect that people are more judgmental than that. I've made my peace with the fact that I am likely being judged while I'm at the gym. I just try to remind myself that I shouldn't let other people control whether or not I reach my goals, and I go anyway.
Exactly. Those threads have made me more self conscious than almost anything else. All I can think during my workout is am I breaking unwritten gym etiquette? I just left the horse barn, do I stink too much to be here? What if they don't know I have makeup on because I just left my second job of the day? I hate those threads. And when I'm at the gym, its screw the world, I got this!0 -
awwww! I heart you.0
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as One of the more overweight people at my gym, i Initially I projected because of my own insecurities that they were all going to be judgy mean meat heads, but truthfully...i think most people are more like you, happy to see you trying to change, happy to help.0
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I have definitely felt anxious at the gym, especially if I am trying something new. I worry that the pros are getting a kick out of the fat chick. I am especially wary of venturing into the weight room, even though I would rather do that than cardio. I hope you're right about people being supportive and thinking positive thoughts, but it's hard sometimes to discern why someone is looking at you--is it because they are thinking about how awesome it is that you are there, or is it because they are amused by your jiggly body on that machine?
I have also felt some serious negativity at health food stores and healthy restaurants. There's one in town called Greens and Proteins and it's next door to a gym. I've eaten there many times and I always feel like there is at least one catty woman there who is throwing me sidelong glances because I'm not fit and in workout gear. :ohwell:0 -
I don't. Here's a quote from him on the MFP girl eye candy thread:bump i like this guy
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1037694-mfp-girl-eye-candy?page=2You just pimped out your MFP friends for a limited time to prove you have hot friends. Sadly this was poorly done as all friends are beautiful, but many of yours are not "hot." If I need MFP when I am over 40, London, you have my permission to kill me. Lastly, this is not a dating site for one reason: no one here wants to date a fat person. WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE HERE. That being said, I admit I have made "love" to a pudgy. I make no excuses. I apologize for nothing.0 -
I think this is a lovely sentiment and I hope it's what most people think.
However every time there's one of those gym rant threads, I suspect that people are more judgmental than that. I've made my peace with the fact that I am likely being judged while I'm at the gym. I just try to remind myself that I shouldn't let other people control whether or not I reach my goals, and I go anyway.
Exactly. Those threads have made me more self conscious than almost anything else. All I can think during my workout is am I breaking unwritten gym etiquette? I just left the horse barn, do I stink too much to be here? What if they don't know I have makeup on because I just left my second job of the day? I hate those threads. And when I'm at the gym, its screw the world, I got this!
95% of the gym rants have to do with borish behavior that would be a rant done anywhere. We could do a workplace rant and people would have similar rants...ie not replacing the toilet paper rolls ...my biggest one is like not racking weights...or wiping your nose while typing could be like not wiping down the equipment. I might rant about a history teacher who likes to hog the copy machine to make cool booklet like things when there are lines of people getting ready for the next class or the next day and want to do it quickly...and that would be like the person who is walking super slow talking on the phone on a treadmill when someone is waiting for their turn. Most of the rants are about people at the gym with poor manners.
I have seen no comments about fat people not belonging there. I have seen no one ever make fun of someone working hard. I have heard people think they are being judged but I have never really seen it. I pointed once to a very heavy woman on the track many years ago. I was coaching cross country and I was admonishing my runners for a crappy effort in that day's practice. I pointed to that woman because she worked hard EVERY day and they should be inspired by her effort and determination. I am so sorry now that I thought highly of her and pointed as I am sure I ruined her resolve to work out forever because she likely assumed I was judging her negatively.0 -
I have definitely felt anxious at the gym, especially if I am trying something new. I worry that the pros are getting a kick out of the fat chick. I am especially wary of venturing into the weight room, even though I would rather do that than cardio. I hope you're right about people being supportive and thinking positive thoughts, but it's hard sometimes to discern why someone is looking at you--is it because they are thinking about how awesome it is that you are there, or is it because they are amused by your jiggly body on that machine?
I have also felt some serious negativity at health food stores and healthy restaurants. There's one in town called Greens and Proteins and it's next door to a gym. I've eaten there many times and I always feel like there is at least one catty woman there who is throwing me sidelong glances because I'm not fit and in workout gear. :ohwell:
It may be that I'm just lucky or in a great mood when I'm at the gym, but the gyms I have worked out in have been pretty supportive places. Just like in other areas, if someone has become successful at something then they're often quite willing to lend a hand. Out of the truly big guys at my current gym we only have 1 *kitten* hat and he was recently kicked out. That day was pretty funny because everyone was celebrating and surprised that we all agreed he was a menace. Then we all went back to our workouts.
Health food stores and health food restaurants are an entirely different thing though. I avoid them like the plague.0 -
I don't. Here's a quote from him on the MFP girl eye candy thread:bump i like this guy
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1037694-mfp-girl-eye-candy?page=2You just pimped out your MFP friends for a limited time to prove you have hot friends. Sadly this was poorly done as all friends are beautiful, but many of yours are not "hot." If I need MFP when I am over 40, London, you have my permission to kill me. Lastly, this is not a dating site for one reason: no one here wants to date a fat person. WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE HERE. That being said, I admit I have made "love" to a pudgy. I make no excuses. I apologize for nothing.
Yeah I was thinking this post was a bit out of character. I agree with the sentiment, though.0 -
I have anxiety in general. I always went to a small 24 hour gym but waited until late so nobody would be there. When I moved the only thing close its a much larger LA FITNESS, I've always felt insecure like people see judging me so when my husband and I had passes to try it out and went, I couldn't even go inside. They've got large windows and you can see inside the gym. Seeing other people ment other people, just other people driving/ walking by would see me!! So we never went. Just this past month after already losing 30 lbs, I decided I needed a change from my trail walking and just dieting,a friend takes me into trying a class there with her.So I went, loved it and joined the gym that day. I've noticed how little I notice other people, so I assume nobody else pays me any attention. I can go alone to work out, but I can't bring myself to go to the class alone when she's not available, maybe one day I will get up the nerve. Thank you for this post.
I've been at this for a while now (almost two years) and I still get nervous. I was going to sign up for a weight lifting class next fall (didn't fit into my schedule) and I kept thinking to myself "Omg, I'm going to be the only girl in the class and I'm going to probably be the fattest one... What am I thinking?!" I signed up anyway and then had to drop it because it interfered with another class I was taking. Still taking a 5k training class, though!
ps, taking that class despite being a terrible runner. I can run for probably 4-5 minutes straight if I push myself...0 -
"I have made love to a pudgy" Lol!0
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great post.. it's nice to see there are people with heart and souls out there... I have realized that fitness is a culture unto itself.. and we embrace anyone who wants to evolve and grow to a healthier self... Thank you for adding something very positive to the message boards.. :flowerforyou:0
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I think this is a lovely sentiment and I hope it's what most people think.
However every time there's one of those gym rant threads, I suspect that people are more judgmental than that. I've made my peace with the fact that I am likely being judged while I'm at the gym. I just try to remind myself that I shouldn't let other people control whether or not I reach my goals, and I go anyway.
Exactly. Those threads have made me more self conscious than almost anything else. All I can think during my workout is am I breaking unwritten gym etiquette? I just left the horse barn, do I stink too much to be here? What if they don't know I have makeup on because I just left my second job of the day? I hate those threads. And when I'm at the gym, its screw the world, I got this!
95% of the gym rants have to do with borish behavior that would be a rant done anywhere. We could do a workplace rant and people would have similar rants...ie not replacing the toilet paper rolls ...my biggest one is like not racking weights...or wiping your nose while typing could be like not wiping down the equipment. I might rant about a history teacher who likes to hog the copy machine to make cool booklet like things when there are lines of people getting ready for the next class or the next day and want to do it quickly...and that would be like the person who is walking super slow talking on the phone on a treadmill when someone is waiting for their turn. Most of the rants are about people at the gym with poor manners.
I have seen no comments about fat people not belonging there. I have seen no one ever make fun of someone working hard. I have heard people think they are being judged but I have never really seen it. I pointed once to a very heavy woman on the track many years ago. I was coaching cross country and I was admonishing my runners for a crappy effort in that day's practice. I pointed to that woman because she worked hard EVERY day and they should be inspired by her effort and determination. I am so sorry now that I thought highly of her and pointed as I am sure I ruined her resolve to work out forever because she likely assumed I was judging her negatively.
That's true, but I have seen plenty of people have a go at women who wear make-up, or people who take selfies, or people who check their phone between sets, or people who told on to the sides/top of the treadmill when they walk, etc. I think all of these examples are perceived as people not working hard. Whether or not it's justified criticism isn't for me to say, but the point is that people are critical, and it's not just about gym etiquette (I also get annoyed when people don't rack the weights).
You do have a point though that I've never read a comment about fat people not belonging there. I think that one is more a case of someone projecting their own insecurity onto others.0 -
That's why I didn't go for a long time...I knew that I knew nothing about the machines and that I would be winded after 5 minutes on the treadmill. It just so happened that my brother (who is a trainer) was in town when I had my "Oh my god I'm FAT" moment. He literally took me to the gym every day for a week and showed me how to do everything. Because of him I went from a 16 to an 8 (and I cried in the dressing room when those 8's fit
) I don't know where I would be now had in not been there.
You were afraid to go to the gym because you were a size 16? I'm a 16 and I think I look pretty darn good, but its strange how different the same sizes are on different people. When I was a size 8 thirty years ago I was extremely frail and bony. Back then a size 8 was really a size 8. congrats to you for breaking that 16 in half.0 -
great post.. it's nice to see there are people with heart and souls out there... I have realized that fitness is a culture unto itself.. and we embrace anyone who wants to evolve and grow to a healthier self... Thank you for adding something very positive to the message boards.. :flowerforyou:
Its nice to step away from all the bullsh*t that goes on in these threads to see something uplifting such as this.
Thanks doll, great post!! :flowerforyou:0 -
I don't like people using MFP as a dating site or to prove their friends are hot. As I said, all friends are beautiful here. But thank you for following my posts. Not that I blame you..
I don't. Here's a quote from him on the MFP girl eye candy thread:bump i like this guy
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1037694-mfp-girl-eye-candy?page=2You just pimped out your MFP friends for a limited time to prove you have hot friends. Sadly this was poorly done as all friends are beautiful, but many of yours are not "hot." If I need MFP when I am over 40, London, you have my permission to kill me. Lastly, this is not a dating site for one reason: no one here wants to date a fat person. WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE HERE. That being said, I admit I have made "love" to a pudgy. I make no excuses. I apologize for nothing.
Yeah I was thinking this post was a bit out of character. I agree with the sentiment, though. 0 -
I am intimidated of the gym, because I have never been an "endurance" girl,,and I feel like the other gym goers will look in disgust at me after I quit the treadmill after 10 or15 minutes because I am out of breath.
Once, I worked up the nerve to go check out a gym to see if I would feel comfortable. I asked the trainer showing me around about the clients, if they were diverse, if they were generally supportive, etc. He walked me out of his office and pointed to a very heavy woman that was working out, and said, "Well, she is here, so you shouldn't feel bad". Needless to say, I did not sign up for that gym, I didn't want to be the girl he was pointing out to the next potential client.0 -
I don't. Here's a quote from him on the MFP girl eye candy thread:bump i like this guy
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1037694-mfp-girl-eye-candy?page=2You just pimped out your MFP friends for a limited time to prove you have hot friends. Sadly this was poorly done as all friends are beautiful, but many of yours are not "hot." If I need MFP when I am over 40, London, you have my permission to kill me. Lastly, this is not a dating site for one reason: no one here wants to date a fat person. WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE HERE. That being said, I admit I have made "love" to a pudgy. I make no excuses. I apologize for nothing.
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NP, not only are you my fitness hero, you are an awesome human. I was going to say a damn nice guy...but you are more than that - and no apologies requried.
I am grateful that you have become my MFP "pal" in the truest sense of the word. I will think of your words when I am giggling down the street looking like a sweaty beet and feeling so out of shape and self-conscious.0 -
Remembering one of your posts and following your posts are two separate entities. Maybe if you got over yourself and came back to reality, you'd realize that not everybody has you up on that pedestal on which you've placed yourself :flowerforyou:
I don't like people using MFP as a dating site or to prove their friends are hot. As I said, all friends are beautiful here. But thank you for following my posts. Not that I blame you..
I don't. Here's a quote from him on the MFP girl eye candy thread:bump i like this guy
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1037694-mfp-girl-eye-candy?page=2You just pimped out your MFP friends for a limited time to prove you have hot friends. Sadly this was poorly done as all friends are beautiful, but many of yours are not "hot." If I need MFP when I am over 40, London, you have my permission to kill me. Lastly, this is not a dating site for one reason: no one here wants to date a fat person. WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE HERE. That being said, I admit I have made "love" to a pudgy. I make no excuses. I apologize for nothing.
Yeah I was thinking this post was a bit out of character. I agree with the sentiment, though.0
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