The struggle is REAL!

Erika2011MaBelleFille

Hi. I've recently set a goal to maintain my current weight, but after years and years of losing weight and always wanting to see the scale go down, I find it difficult to stop trying to lose weight. My fear is gaining weight...does anyone else find it difficult to change mentality and stop trying to lose the weight? How do you deal?

Christine_72

I know exactly what you mean. The excitement of seeing the scale numbers going down is replaced by hum drum same numbers everyday, It's as if we have nothing to strive for or look forward to anymore.

You eventually get used to it, or find some other goal to excited about.

Erika2011MaBelleFille

Yes! You get it. I will have to be content with my weight AND hopefully find something else to get excited about. Thanks

leejoyce31

erika60007 wrote: »

Hi. I've recently set a goal to maintain my current weight, but after years and years of losing weight and always wanting to see the scale go down, I find it difficult to stop trying to lose weight. My fear is gaining weight...does anyone else find it difficult to change mentality and stop trying to lose the weight? How do you deal?

At first I was scared of gaining. Wasn't too worried about seeing the scale go down because I actually lost more than I needed to. My biggest fear was getting accustomed to eating more and not being able to return to a deficit if I needed to. Was really stressed the first month or so of maintenance. The stress passed and I'm not scared anymore. I just monitor closely.

Christine_72

Oh, and every week that I don't gain is a victory

healthy491

Hi , I am going through the EXACT same thing right now ! Add me if you want

kommodevaran

I too had that fear for a long time into maintenance. Losing weight is something I know how to do; maintaining weight has always been the difficult part. So I actually decided (found that tip in here) to see maintenance as "micro-yoyo-dieting" - let my weight reach top of my range and then get more strict for a while and get it down again. Losing a couple of pounds is no big deal. But then, soon after, I realized that I just didn't worry about weight gain anymore: I'm eating and moving in a way I like (I would do this even if it didn't make me keep a stable, healthy weight), and I'm weighing myself every day, so there's no way the weight can sneak up on me.

But - if you can't stop thinking you have to keep losing more weight, (not just that "normal" fear of regaining), you should seek professional help. Eating disorders are real. Be careful.

TavistockToad

set yourself a fitness goal so you have something to aim for which isn't scale-related.

and don't forget you should have a maintenance range not one number, to account for fluctuations.

Return2Fit

Oh yes!

I totally feel you...
I just set a weekly weight goal and make weight as always, allowing myself a 4 pound margin either below or above my "maintain" weight.

RoxieDawn

I do believe that most people that have been dieting or eating a deficit for a quite a long time have a natural fear of gaining weight. IF you were to search here in MFP on this topic you will see a lot of threads created by people just like yourself. I am one of those. I even took the upping calories a bit exetrme and just cut off the deficit and starting eat more right off the bat. I gained it too fast and had to go right back to the deficit.

Reverse slowly is best. Up calories a small bit each week to allow your body to get used to a little more food, and get used to the sway on the scale upwards (and downwards) from water retention.. Also trending your weight in maintenance is a good thing so that you can use a weight range (i.e. +3/-3 pounds) instead a spot on weight. This is true even more being female and the surges on the scale that occur. Doing this allowed me to make peace with the scale. I still keep up with body measurements etc, and change up exercise when needed.

Erika2011MaBelleFille

Thanks Everyone. It is quite the struggle. I learned a lot from all the good advice on here. In the end, it is about health so keeping that in mind it's best not to be consumed by worry and know I can lose weight IF I have to:)

ericatoday

Yup. Im at my goal weight at still set at a deficit. Idk when ill be happy with my weight. Im happy when i look in the mirror but not ready to be happy with the scale for the same fear as you gaining weight.

Erika2011MaBelleFille

ericatoday wrote: »

Yup. Im at my goal weight at still set at a deficit. Idk when ill be happy with my weight. Im happy when i look in the mirror but not ready to be happy with the scale for the same fear as you gaining weight.

I see your point. It's like you're finally happy with the person staring back in the mirror, and you end up thinking...if I don't watch it I may end up gaining weight...it's a process. We'll get there:)

STEVE142142

I know exactly where you're coming from. It took me about a month-and-a-half to figure out my maintenance and I finally reached a comfortable place. I'm not awake I could never imagine my way now less than I was in high school.

I like where I am but I still want to lose a few pounds but I'm not stressing over it. What I'm beginning to realize and you have to realize is that you have to be happy with where you are and if you are it's just a matter of changing your mindset as far as losing weight. To me, you really have to make a decision that I'm happy where I am and once you reach that decision the process becomes easy. We all are our worst critic and you are the last person to realize what we've accomplished. You stated it perfectly you have to like the person looking back at you in the mirror

You already learned the success principles to lose the weight now it's just a matter of transferring those success principles and learning how to maintain the weight.

mommarnurse

The mental stress of this is All but killing me. And maybe More so the stress of trying to keep up/increase my fitness in my already way busy life. I get it. I think we all feel this way. Most of us, anyway.

leejoyce31

mommarnurse wrote: »

The mental stress of this is All but killing me. And maybe More so the stress of trying to keep up/increase my fitness in my already way busy life. I get it. I think we all feel this way. Most of us, anyway.

At first I felt stressed about maintenance, but I found that wasn't making me happy. So, I decided that I had to try to relax and not let this cause me so much angst. It wasn't worth that. I find it challenging to increase my fitness too. I would like to do more than 45 - 60 minutes of cardio 6 days a week. I add light weights on the day I do my pilates. I'm just not up to the challenge right now to do more. It would be cool to be more active and be able to increase my TDEE. Maybe one day.

I've been maintaining at slightly below my BMI for about 4 months now.

NancyYale

I'm 5 pounds below Goal (which was a little high), and can't decide if I want to lose more, or just maintain. So far, I have maintained below goal for 4 months, which is a first. It's a little scary, but I weigh in every 3-4 days, and have stopped scale creep several times now, so I KNOW I can do it.

Changing the mindset from lose to maintain is a tough thing for a lot of us.

slim168mfp

I also am going through that. I still find myself watching the scale, or looking in the mirror...telling myself numbers dont lie, remember what you have accomplished. The fear of getting fat again is real even at maintenance. I hate it, but I understand the struggle. So I live with this cross by sticking to the point. Cause its all in my head about my body. Those around me are always telling me that I am shriveling down to nothing. But I am still very very watchful of what I eat and when I eat...I still rigorously count cals...no matter what. This is my 3rd year. I have dropped over 100lbs, but I wont allow myself to go back to that PRISON of being fat!!! EVER !!!

ercarroll311

Definitely having this struggle! I'm having to find new goals to focus on, such as new workouts to tighten up or really being good about my macros and finding high protein recipes I like... I've had the mentality for more than year to see the number going down, but I'm 10 lbs below my original goal and know it's time to level out. I'm having issues getting to my maintenance calories bc I'm so active and eat really high protein and fiber, so it keeps me full. Again that year plus of eating less has me in a routine that I'm afraid to break from. I've gained weight back in the past, don't wanna be there again!

slim168mfp

ercarroll311 wrote: »

Definitely having this struggle! I'm having to find new goals to focus on, such as new workouts to tighten up or really being good about my macros and finding high protein recipes I like... I've had the mentality for more than year to see the number going down, but I'm 10 lbs below my original goal and know it's time to level out. I'm having issues getting to my maintenance calories bc I'm so active and eat really high protein and fiber, so it keeps me full. Again that year plus of eating less has me in a routine that I'm afraid to break from. I've gained weight back in the past, don't wanna be there again!

Absolutely Right!

T0M_K

I am in the struggle of being able to stay the course of losing. hard to imagine me "being at goal weight" despite it not really being all that far away. 20 lbs probably. I feel like once I get there, i'd be so happy with the non flabby body, that would be motivation enough and seeing the scale staying at the same goal weight is a victory.

maybe my mind with change, we'll see when i get there.

by the way @ecarroll311, your puppy is awesome :P

Abm4n

As a maintainer, my goal now is "efficiency" - that means reaching the same output i.e. same weight range with less input. Inputs might include food and exercise and general "worry" and obsession about food. That means greater simplicity and reliability. Yes, it also means exercising LESS and eating the same food most days. After a while I find that I get more satisfaction from a stable, simple diet with less ingredients than I do from eating an unrestricted diet that I then have to work off.

After a while, I have found the worry goes away (to be replaced by vigilance).

slim168mfp

Abm4n wrote: »

As a maintainer, my goal now is "efficiency" - that means reaching the same output i.e. same weight range with less input. Inputs might include food and exercise and general "worry" and obsession about food. That means greater simplicity and reliability. Yes, it also means exercising LESS and eating the same food most days. After a while I find that I get more satisfaction from a stable, simple diet with less ingredients than I do from eating an unrestricted diet that I then have to work off.

After a while, I have found the worry goes away (to be replaced by vigilance).

Absolutely Right!!