Depressed and nobody to talk to...

Francl27

How do you deal with it? I can't turn off my brain and I've been crying all day... and trying really hard to hide it from everyone else...

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kpeterson539

This happens to me more often than I'd like to admit. My brain never stops and I overthink everything.

I try to get out of the house, even if it's just to go to a coffee shop to sit for a bit or just walk through Home Depot. As long as I'm around people, although I may not interact, I generally feel a bit better.

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Francl27

kpeterson539 wrote: »

This happens to me more often than I'd like to admit. My brain never stops and I overthink everything.

I try to get out of the house, even if it's just to go to a coffee shop to sit for a bit or just walk through Home Depot. As long as I'm around people, although I may not interact, I generally feel a bit better.

Ugh actually it's been rough today. Had to pick up the kids at school and had nobody to talk to while the kids played (I have one friend there but I don't want to pester him every day), and tonight is the school PTA meeting and I'm just going to sit alone again... I don't know why I said I'd go

kpeterson539

Put a smile on your face. It's like tricking yourself that everything is ok.

I always feel conspicuous sitting alone but I try to take the time to be observational.

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2MuchTyme

We are here.....if you want interactive let me know...ill chat

Francl27

LiftingLady5 wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

kpeterson539 wrote: »

This happens to me more often than I'd like to admit. My brain never stops and I overthink everything.

I try to get out of the house, even if it's just to go to a coffee shop to sit for a bit or just walk through Home Depot. As long as I'm around people, although I may not interact, I generally feel a bit better.

Ugh actually it's been rough today. Had to pick up the kids at school and had nobody to talk to while the kids played (I have one friend there but I don't want to pester him every day), and tonight is the school PTA meeting and I'm just going to sit alone again... I don't know why I said I'd go

Ahhh....the emptiness years. I'm there too. It's rough with kids as I live for them, do everything for them. People say stop and do stuff for yourself.....and I just want to say I don't even know who I am anymore. Plus there isn't time for that. You get lost somewhere along the way. Maybe try to start thinking of little things that you enjoy during the meeting....plan something for you....for some positive thoughts to spend your time and it might help reduce your stressful feelings.

How do you not go nuts? I guess it doesn't help that my marriage has been pretty much going downhill for 2 years and that I really don't have any friends to talk to. I just feel that nobody cares about me or respects/appreciates me...

Also I'm PMSing so it really doesn't help, but today has just been completely awful.

aalixandruh

Go seek help. I'm going to see a therapist on Thursday because I've felt so horrible and anxious lately. Don't be ashamed of it. Everyone needs a little "bump" back into their norm every now and then. Good luck to you.

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ClubSilencio

Find some meetup groups in your area and explore new activities.

Sounds like you need more social interaction. Perhaps volunteering would be beneficial.

lexi3500

I'm the same boat as u mad

lexi3500

You can talk to me

strozman

LiftingLady5 wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

kpeterson539 wrote: »

This happens to me more often than I'd like to admit. My brain never stops and I overthink everything.

I try to get out of the house, even if it's just to go to a coffee shop to sit for a bit or just walk through Home Depot. As long as I'm around people, although I may not interact, I generally feel a bit better.

Ugh actually it's been rough today. Had to pick up the kids at school and had nobody to talk to while the kids played (I have one friend there but I don't want to pester him every day), and tonight is the school PTA meeting and I'm just going to sit alone again... I don't know why I said I'd go

Ahhh....the emptiness years. I'm there too. It's rough with kids as I live for them, do everything for them. People say stop and do stuff for yourself.....and I just want to say I don't even know who I am anymore. Plus there isn't time for that. You get lost somewhere along the way. Maybe try to start thinking of little things that you enjoy during the meeting....plan something for you....for some positive thoughts to spend your time and it might help reduce your stressful feelings.

Beautiful reply LiftingLady5

KennyDL

Sometimes, I like being alone but the thoughts are so annoying. My brain keeps thinking about what's the future is going to hold. I think for you, distraction is the key. I suggest volunteering.

Francl27

ClubSilencio wrote: »

Find some meetup groups in your area and explore new activities.

Sounds like you need more social interaction. Perhaps volunteering would be beneficial.

I'm an introvert and pretty awkward socially... I feel very uncomfortable in groups... It's very hard for me to approach people and I wouldn't even bother a friend if she was talking with someone I don't know... I only had a few good friendships in my life and was always let down, sometimes badly, so it doesn't help... and I don't want to be needy with the people that I like and lose them too... even though I'do anything for them... I've honestly forgotten what it's like to have people there for you... my family was never there and my husband just doesn't seem to care anymore.

I joined a hiking meet up actually and loved the first hike, but we had 10 people... 20 people signed up for this week end's and I'm really not sure I'm going to go. Nothing worse for me than being alone with other people who are interacting. I'd much rather be alone.

So yeah... it sucks...

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Francl27

LiftingLady5 wrote: »

Cutaway_Collar wrote: »

Why don't you come to the beautiful ones selfie thread and post selfies and indulge in the online vanity project?

I don't recommend this if you are a sensitive soul however.... @projectsix made fun of my pajamas and I cried when I accidentally posted in this one

Aww.

Yeah I don't look good enough for selfies...

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Domino_75

I feel like I could have started this thread. I feel just like you do @FrancI27. In my home town I felt like an outcast, even though most of the people I was around was family. We moved a couple months ago and that has actually helped. I have no expectations that people will talk to me. I have actually had more conversations with complete strangers in the last two months than I had in two years in my home town. MFP has made a world of difference. I can vent here and have people to talk to and have fun with on my terms. I'm an introvert as well, so there are days I don't feel like interacting, but most days this is where I come to have a good time and get out of my depressive moods.

Timshel_

Meditation/prayer/centering...there is always someone there is how I have learned to cope. I also found a counselor that I could go to that I could vent to when needed.

Francl27

Domino_75 wrote: »

I feel like I could have started this thread. I feel just like you do @FrancI27. In my home town I felt like an outcast, even though most of the people I was around was family. We moved a couple months ago and that has actually helped. I have no expectations that people will talk to me. I have actually had more conversations with complete strangers in the last two months than I had in two years in my home town. MFP has made a world of difference. I can vent here and have people to talk to and have fun with on my terms. I'm an introvert as well, so there are days I don't feel like interacting, but most days this is where I come to have a good time and get out of my depressive moods.

I have stalkers here unfortunately... people who keep posting things in my threads... they're on ignore but their posts appear when they are quoted, so it's unfortunate. I've found that very often, there are so many mean spirited people online, it really doesn't help with my mood either.

PowerMan40

I am very much an intovert as well, it has taken me many years of practice. However I d like to tell you there is hope. I started by talking to the chashers at grocery stores, They always say how you doing, and I started saying nice things back to them. Instead of just saying good and looking away, I would notice something and comment on it. Standing straight and smiling helped me too. People dont want to approach a 280 lb man who is not smiling. lol. Look up into the eyes of folks walking around, and smile, 100 out of 100 they will smile back. You will start feeling better about everything, and you smiled at a stranger, and may have made their day better as well.

Francl27

PowerMan40 wrote: »

I am very much an intovert as well, it has taken me many years of practice. However I d like to tell you there is hope. I started by talking to the chashers at grocery stores, They always say how you doing, and I started saying nice things back to them. Instead of just saying good and looking away, I would notice something and comment on it. Standing straight and smiling helped me too. People dont want to approach a 280 lb man who is not smiling. lol. Look up into the eyes of folks walking around, and smile, 100 out of 100 they will smile back. You will start feeling better about everything, and you smiled at a stranger, and may have made their day better as well.

I didn't use to be that way, honestly, but life kicked me in the *kitten*.

PowerMan40

Francl27 wrote: »

PowerMan40 wrote: »

I am very much an intovert as well, it has taken me many years of practice. However I d like to tell you there is hope. I started by talking to the chashers at grocery stores, They always say how you doing, and I started saying nice things back to them. Instead of just saying good and looking away, I would notice something and comment on it. Standing straight and smiling helped me too. People dont want to approach a 280 lb man who is not smiling. lol. Look up into the eyes of folks walking around, and smile, 100 out of 100 they will smile back. You will start feeling better about everything, and you smiled at a stranger, and may have made their day better as well.

I didn't use to be that way, honestly, but life kicked me in the *kitten*.

So you know then that you can, but you just wont trust, and go for it. I am this way, just becase I am, always have been, All you need to do, is one foot in front of another, and change small things you do. If I can do it, Im sure you can, since you have not always been this way.

chocolate_owl

Are you feeling any better today? How was the meeting last night?

jonnucke

I understand, its hard for me to make friends (i'm very awkward) especially with my kids' friends' parents. Also since i live in a super rural area, a lot of my passions are FAR away. the only way i make it through is sharing my passions with my kids.

Francl27

chocolate_owl wrote: »

Are you feeling any better today? How was the meeting last night?

Drama happened with my kids and I didn't get to go. I wasn't exactly heartbroken about it (I went to the last one, it was just awkward with me not really knowing anyone) and I got to spend an hour chatting with my friend instead (kids do the same activity). Didn't really help but I suppose it got my mind off things for a bit. I like him a lot but he's not a very close friend - I don't have any of those. We just see each other all the time as our kids are good friends, so I suppose it's a good thing that we get along well.. I just don't want to bother him with my problems anyway. I appreciate the irony that it's because of depression that I lost most of my friends when I was 22, and that now I'm just trying hard to hide it so that I don't lose the few people I care about.. which of course doesn't do anything to help with my depression as I can't talk to anyone.

The rest of the night kinda sucked but we just watched TV.

Now, I know that it's a big part due to my hormones (I get crazy PMS symptoms) and TOM showed up today... but still. I'm still crying today and really don't want to do anything... no appetite even though my stomach's growling. My husband's trying to make me feel better but I really don't want to talk to him and I just want to be left alone. Just been watching some shows while on the stationary bike. It hasn't been that bad for years. Sigh. Hoping it will just go away when my hormones calm down.

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chocolate_owl

Francl27 wrote: »

chocolate_owl wrote: »

Are you feeling any better today? How was the meeting last night?

Drama happened with my kids and I didn't get to go. I wasn't exactly heartbroken about it (I went to the last one, it was just awkward with me not really knowing anyone) and I got to spend an hour chatting with my friend instead (kids do the same activity). Didn't really help but I suppose it got my mind off things for a bit. I like him a lot but he's not a very close friend - I don't have any of those. We just see each other all the time as our kids are good friends, so I suppose it's a good thing that we get along well.. I just don't want to bother him with my problems anyway. I appreciate the irony that it's because of depression that I lost most of my friends when I was 22, and that now I'm just trying hard to hide it so that I don't lose the few people I care about.. which of course doesn't do anything to help with my depression as I can't talk to anyone.

The rest of the night kinda sucked but we just watched TV.

Now, I know that it's a big part due to my hormones (I get crazy PMS symptoms) and TOM showed up today... but still. I'm still crying today and really don't want to do anything... no appetite even though my stomach's growling. My husband's trying to make me feel better but I really don't want to talk to him and I just want to be left alone. Just been watching some shows while on the stationary bike. It hasn't been that bad for years. Sigh. Hoping it will just go away when my hormones calm down.

Hormones related to PMS are really bad for me too. Have you talked to your OB/Gyn about (a different) birth control? I was on antidepressants when I started a daily pill (estrogen + progesterone), and 2 months later I was able to wean off the antidepressants. I was more or less okay for years. 2 years ago I switched to an implant (progesterone only) and started having super emotional PMS (uncontrollable crying, constant suicidal thoughts), so I was able to confirm birth control/estrogen levels being a factor for my mental health. (Unfortunately I couldn't go back on the pill because it gave me migraines, but that's another rant for another time.)

When I go through my really dark days, my brain tells me I shouldn't tell my friends or husband what's going on, but they want to know. They want to be there for me and make sure I'm safe. They want to tell me they love me. It's hard, but there's nothing wrong with asking a friend to come over and be with you because you're struggling and you don't want to be alone.

Also, I know right now everything is miserable, but maybe in a couple of days when the hormonal fog lifts, remember that your husband was trying to make you feel better? You've said you feel stuck in your marriage, but at least there's moments like that where he shows he cares.

I really, really feel for you. I'm glad you posted on here... You need the support, and there are people who care.