How to stop binges?

Hey guys,

I haven't been on here in a long time (at least a year or two). For a little backstory, I have been fat pretty much my entire life, except when I went on here in 10th grade and lost about 40 pounds in 4 months, and gave myself an eating disorder. I gained back a necessary 15-20ish pounds, and then maintained a while by religiously exercising and watching what I ate. Unfortunately, the weight crept back on, and over summer vacation (end of Junior year), I binged my way back above my starting weight. I run cross country, and at 5'4 140 pounds (I lost around 6 in the past month or so through MFP), I am very uncomfortable with how I look (read: bat wings, huge hips, tummy pudge, and fat thighs) and it makes me slower, as I am around 10-15 pounds heavier than my comfortable racing weight from last year, and very self-conscious about it.

Anyways, I have never had a chance to correct my poor relationship with food, as I spiral through phases of binging and restricting, with my weight always going up. Last night, I binged again for the first time in a while. I ate and ate, some of it healthy (2 cups cooked broccoli, 3 cups raw carrots, 2 Macintosh apples) and some of it not so much (3 Chobani flips, around 1/2 a container of hummus, 3 slices of fancy whole wheat bakery bread with about 4 oz of Brie cheese and half a jar of blueberry jam). I ate until my stomach was distended and hurt, and this was all after dinner.

I do this a lot. I binge and hate myself for it, I become noticeably fatter and slower each day. I wear my fat like a suit of shame, and so I try to fix it. And then I become hungry or feel deprived, so I ruin my hard work. I'm just down right now, to be honest.

Please guys, any kind words or advice or even tough love would be helpful. I need a reality check, and maybe a hug, and most of all, I need my athletic body back. I don't understand those who have a healthy relationship with food and just eat what they please. I wish I never had this problem. :P

Thanks for listening to my rambling guys;
-Ahem gonna pretend that I'm anonymous when all of you can see my username quite clearly...

Replies

  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    edited September 2016
    Have you tried meal planning, and sticking to the plan?

    Are you getting treatment for your eating disorder and body image issues?
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    Look, if you broke your leg, you wouldn't try to fix it yourself. Why try to fix binge and restrict cycles on your own? Please get professional help.

    Meanwhile, check out this book on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for food issues, which was available in my library system, so perhaps yours as well.

    The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person

    Can thinking and eating like a thin person be learned, similar to learning to drive or use a computer? Beck (Cognitive Therapy for Challenging Problems) contends so, based on decades of work with patients who have lost pounds and maintained weight through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Beck's six-week program adapts CBT, a therapeutic system developed by Beck's father, Aaron, in the 1960s, to specific challenges faced by yo-yo dieters, including negative thinking, bargaining, emotional eating, bingeing, and eating out. Beck counsels readers day-by-day, introducing new elements (creating advantage response cards, choosing a diet, enlisting a diet coach, making a weight-loss graph) progressively and offering tools to help readers stay focused (writing exercises, to-do lists, ways to counter negative thoughts). There are no eating plans, calorie counts, recipes or exercises; according to Beck, any healthy diet will work if readers learn to think differently about eating and food. Beck's book is like an extended therapy session with a diet coach. (Apr.)
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,213 Member
    usmcmp wrote: »

    Some good tips there. I especially liked the suggestion that if you have had binging tendencies you need to avoid any rapid weight loss plans. For me, even a goal of 2lbs a week was too much.

  • GottaBurnEmAll
    GottaBurnEmAll Posts: 7,722 Member
    I agree with goldthistime. I never had a binging problem until the time I tried an eating plan that was too restrictive. Then I found myself binge eating.

    Are your restrictive phases too restrictive? Are you punishing yourself with weight loss?

    Try turning that thinking around and planning a smaller deficit. When I went back to a smaller deficit, my binge problems stopped.
  • Chloe9218160
    Chloe9218160 Posts: 61 Member
    Have you tried meal planning, and sticking to the plan?

    Are you getting treatment for your eating disorder and body image issues?

    I had around 1.5 years of therapy and treatment, but I am far from perfect. My therapy was for when I couldn't eat enough, and had a pretty nice body, and that doesn't apply to eating too much and having a pretty crappy body.
  • singingflutelady
    singingflutelady Posts: 8,736 Member
    Have you tried meal planning, and sticking to the plan?

    Are you getting treatment for your eating disorder and body image issues?

    I had around 1.5 years of therapy and treatment, but I am far from perfect. My therapy was for when I couldn't eat enough, and had a pretty nice body, and that doesn't apply to eating too much and having a pretty crappy body.

    But it seems your problems stem from restriction so it does apply. Your post has many, many, many red flags and you need to get back into therapy asap
  • Chloe9218160
    Chloe9218160 Posts: 61 Member
    Have you tried meal planning, and sticking to the plan?

    Are you getting treatment for your eating disorder and body image issues?

    I had around 1.5 years of therapy and treatment, but I am far from perfect. My therapy was for when I couldn't eat enough, and had a pretty nice body, and that doesn't apply to eating too much and having a pretty crappy body.

    Oops, forgot to add, I had a meal plan for when I needed to gain weight, and then for one to maintain, but I don't have one for when to lose. I will email my nutritionist about that. :)
  • Chloe9218160
    Chloe9218160 Posts: 61 Member
    I agree with goldthistime. I never had a binging problem until the time I tried an eating plan that was too restrictive. Then I found myself binge eating.

    Are your restrictive phases too restrictive? Are you punishing yourself with weight loss?

    Try turning that thinking around and planning a smaller deficit. When I went back to a smaller deficit, my binge problems stopped.

    By restrictive, I just mean the 1,200 calorie setting on MFP. I run around 3-4 miles a day with a long run (6-7 miles) once a week, so I usually end up eating more than 1,200 total. I will use MFP and then feel deprived or something I guess, and then just go hog wild on my entire pantry.
  • This content has been removed.
  • singingflutelady
    singingflutelady Posts: 8,736 Member
    I agree with goldthistime. I never had a binging problem until the time I tried an eating plan that was too restrictive. Then I found myself binge eating.

    Are your restrictive phases too restrictive? Are you punishing yourself with weight loss?

    Try turning that thinking around and planning a smaller deficit. When I went back to a smaller deficit, my binge problems stopped.

    By restrictive, I just mean the 1,200 calorie setting on MFP. I run around 3-4 miles a day with a long run (6-7 miles) once a week, so I usually end up eating more than 1,200 total. I will use MFP and then feel deprived or something I guess, and then just go hog wild on my entire pantry.

    You can eat more than 1200 calories though! Also you need to quit labelling foods good and bad. Nothing wrong with bread, hummus, cheese, etc. If you restrict everything that you consider bad then that leads to binging too.
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
    Love the Totoro, by the way.

    Two tricks I have to stop myself (and admittedly, sometimes they work better than others:
    1. WATER SLAM: When I feel a binge coming on, I drink 3 or 4o glasses of water no ice AS FAST AS I CAN. To the point that it makes me physically ill and almost nauseous. My thought is, "all right brain, you want so bad to put something in your mouth? FINE! Take at (gulp!) and THAT (gulp!) "
    2. MIRROR TALK: I go into the bathroom, look at myself in the mirror and then say OUT LOUD (thinking it doesn't seem to work as well) and talk myself down. "You don't REALLY want to do this, do you? This is not the way to deal with your emotional stress, now, is it? No of course not. Let's stand her for a minute and figure out what's going on that is making you want to eat right now. There there. See? It's going to be OK! "
  • greena
    greena Posts: 36 Member
    I understand what you're going through - I've had a problem since I was a teen with binge eating. #1 - you are eating too few calories!!! Remember this adage: athletes train - other people diet. You are an ATHLETE - you need to eat like one. I would stay in the 1,500-1,800 range minimum. Then:
    1) Read Beck Diet Solution. Never, never eat standing up (unless it's some carrots or veggies you've set aside to nosh on and you've tracked it). Concentrate when you're eating on your food, not other things.
    2) track ALL your food. You have to get familiar with portion sizes and normal amounts.
    3) Make sure you're getting enough protein.
    4) Weight train - keep up your muscle mass.
    5) Drink a lot of water before meals.
    6) If you have a real bad time for binges (mine is always around dinner), plan to take a walk or something else during that time.
    Good luck!! Feel free to friend me if you're looking for support on here -- I am too!!
  • Danika
    Danika Posts: 11 Member
    I support all of the posters that say you should consider re-enlisting some sort of professional guidance.

    As a case study, I started this go around at exactly your weight and height and I am losing comfortably on 1,650 calories and similar exercise levels. 1,200 would be way too low for me. Also, 5'4'' and 140 lbs is within a healthy BMI. I understand you want to be slimmer for race weight and aesthetics. I also felt chubby at this weight and height but it hardly felt 'huge' or any of the other very negative words you're using. I'd also consider how this can be addressed with a professional.

    Please seek the support you require.

    ~Danika
  • GottaBurnEmAll
    GottaBurnEmAll Posts: 7,722 Member
    edited September 2016
    I agree with goldthistime. I never had a binging problem until the time I tried an eating plan that was too restrictive. Then I found myself binge eating.

    Are your restrictive phases too restrictive? Are you punishing yourself with weight loss?

    Try turning that thinking around and planning a smaller deficit. When I went back to a smaller deficit, my binge problems stopped.

    By restrictive, I just mean the 1,200 calorie setting on MFP. I run around 3-4 miles a day with a long run (6-7 miles) once a week, so I usually end up eating more than 1,200 total. I will use MFP and then feel deprived or something I guess, and then just go hog wild on my entire pantry.

    I'm thin, short and old and I eat more than 1200 calories to lose. That *is* restrictive, and likely TOO restrictive for you! You can eat more than 1200. How old are you? I'd like to plug your stats into a calculator. I'm sure I'm older and I know I'm shorter than you and weigh less than you.
  • d4_54
    d4_54 Posts: 62 Member
    Hey guys,

    I haven't been on here in a long time (at least a year or two). For a little backstory, I have been fat pretty much my entire life, except when I went on here in 10th grade and lost about 40 pounds in 4 months, and gave myself an eating disorder. I gained back a necessary 15-20ish pounds, and then maintained a while by religiously exercising and watching what I ate. Unfortunately, the weight crept back on, and over summer vacation (end of Junior year), I binged my way back above my starting weight. I run cross country, and at 5'4 140 pounds (I lost around 6 in the past month or so through MFP), I am very uncomfortable with how I look (read: bat wings, huge hips, tummy pudge, and fat thighs) and it makes me slower, as I am around 10-15 pounds heavier than my comfortable racing weight from last year, and very self-conscious about it.

    Anyways, I have never had a chance to correct my poor relationship with food, as I spiral through phases of binging and restricting, with my weight always going up. Last night, I binged again for the first time in a while. I ate and ate, some of it healthy (2 cups cooked broccoli, 3 cups raw carrots, 2 Macintosh apples) and some of it not so much (3 Chobani flips, around 1/2 a container of hummus, 3 slices of fancy whole wheat bakery bread with about 4 oz of Brie cheese and half a jar of blueberry jam). I ate until my stomach was distended and hurt, and this was all after dinner.

    I do this a lot. I binge and hate myself for it, I become noticeably fatter and slower each day. I wear my fat like a suit of shame, and so I try to fix it. And then I become hungry or feel deprived, so I ruin my hard work. I'm just down right now, to be honest.

    Please guys, any kind words or advice or even tough love would be helpful. I need a reality check, and maybe a hug, and most of all, I need my athletic body back. I don't understand those who have a healthy relationship with food and just eat what they please. I wish I never had this problem. :P

    Thanks for listening to my rambling guys;
    -Ahem gonna pretend that I'm anonymous when all of you can see my username quite clearly...

    I used to be where you are and I am not anymore. You can be here to.

    First I had to break the binge diet cycle. I did this by eating what I wanted without restriction or illumination. I made sure I was not walking around tired or hungry as this leads to binging. When you decide you will eat and enjoy every meal then you can look forward to these meals and this will help with binges. Important that you are mentally and physically satisfied every meal. Forget about your weight at this point. You will probably lose weight at this point anyway. You may want to binge but you will know it's not because you are hungry.

    Next
    Then I changed my mindset. Get work on learning how to totally accept yourself. You are enough now!

    Next
    Now that you are starting to realise you are enough and hopefully dealing with the reasons you are binging (if you still are but I bet you are not at this point) then you can start to make better choices with food. (Get help with this)

    Do not exercise too much
    Do not focus too much on the food
    Try and be happy doing things you like

    Your body will love this and you will balance out to a normal weight.

    I tell you this works. I know the first stage is hard. I hope you have the strength to start this.
  • d4_54
    d4_54 Posts: 62 Member
    Elimination not illumination
  • d4_54
    d4_54 Posts: 62 Member
    greena wrote: »
    I understand what you're going through - I've had a problem since I was a teen with binge eating. #1 - you are eating too few calories!!! Remember this adage: athletes train - other people diet. You are an ATHLETE - you need to eat like one. I would stay in the 1,500-1,800 range minimum. Then:
    1) Read Beck Diet Solution. Never, never eat standing up (unless it's some carrots or veggies you've set aside to nosh on and you've tracked it). Concentrate when you're eating on your food, not other things.
    2) track ALL your food. You have to get familiar with portion sizes and normal amounts.
    3) Make sure you're getting enough protein.
    4) Weight train - keep up your muscle mass.
    5) Drink a lot of water before meals.
    6) If you have a real bad time for binges (mine is always around dinner), plan to take a walk or something else during that time.
    Good luck!! Feel free to friend me if you're looking for support on here -- I am too!!

    You are advising her how to avoid binging as opposed to addressing why she feels like binging. What if she can't take a walk around that time or do something else?Are you saying it is ok for Chloe to feel like binging as long as she is able to control it?
  • Parkersspace
    Parkersspace Posts: 17 Member
    At 5'4" and 140 lbs you have a bmi of 23.9. This is a very healthy bmi for an active, athletic teen, young lady. I struggled with eating disorders when I was young and always very athletic and the weight my body wanted me to be compared to the weight my head wanted me to be. When I lost I was never really happy with what I saw in the mirror there was always something and it was extremely hard, I had to have HUGE calorie deficits to lose to just be the weight another person my height would be. This is what happens when you are active and have more muscle than others. I was a gymnast and cyclist and had just always been climbing, cycling, skiing and active and built more muscle than others due to genetics. I know the damage I did to my metabolism through 4 or 5 years of that extreme calorie restriction to weigh a number. When my husband finally through out my scale and I came to terms with I would eat healthy and weigh what that took me to (around 140 at 5'5" btw, the weight stayed steady, I became really healthy and much happier. I accepted how I looked at that weight, which was good and learned to live that way. When my fat percent was measure at that 140 I was 17 to 20 percent. Don't fixate on a number, be healthy and enjoy your food and exercise.
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,179 Member
    Hello Anony Mouse. You write, "any kind words or advice or even tough love would be helpful. I need a reality check, and maybe a hug, and most of all, I need my athletic body back. I don't understand those who have a healthy relationship with food and just eat what they please. I wish I never had this problem."
    I write, it saddens me to see that you state that using this site as a minor caused you to develop your eating disorder. I don't dispute it. It just saddens me. My kind words are: You will succeed and win this struggle. My advice is: Be gentle with yourself. My reality check is: You go overboard with restrictions, both in total calories and in food choices.
    () That's my hug. Athletic body? Maybe do power lifting for a while. It's still athletic.

    The thing you need to learn is that having a healthy relationship with food and eating what we please are not the same thing. Brains still seek sweet. The hand that grabs the first cookie can grab another and another. We have to train ourselves to be satisfied with the food we need, rather than allowing our primitive impulses to eat all available calories in this modern world where calories are abundant. This is still a journey, but it's a journey to the end of your long healthy life, rather than a race to a short-term goal.
  • lvelandi
    lvelandi Posts: 2 Member
    I know how you feel, as I am façon thé same problem. You put in words exactly how I feel. You are not alone dear. Lots of love for you
  • nowine4me
    nowine4me Posts: 3,985 Member
    usmcmp wrote: »

    Some good tips there. I especially liked the suggestion that if you have had binging tendencies you need to avoid any rapid weight loss plans. For me, even a goal of 2lbs a week was too much.

    This is a really good article. Thanks for sharing!
  • NancyYale
    NancyYale Posts: 171 Member
    I've lost 110 pounds and STILL binge occasionally. What helped was was to stop beating myself up about it and THINK HARD about the triggers. For me that was either true hunger or getting too far away from routine. So, I tinkered with what and when I ate to make sure I was never really hungry, and I set a livable routine in the beginning. Most important, I stopped hating on myself for it and giving it that much power over me. The better I ate, the more satisfied I was and the stronger my habits became, the less I binged. When I did, I looked for a trigger I could avoid in the future and moved on. And the weight came off. Relax and just keep going.
  • jahillegas_51
    jahillegas_51 Posts: 143 Member
    What does your current eating habits look like? I went through a very similar process, in my life too.

    In short, the more rigid and strict my meal plans were, the more likely I binged on foods I restricted. I often called these binges "cheat meals".
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    edited September 2016
    I agree with goldthistime. I never had a binging problem until the time I tried an eating plan that was too restrictive. Then I found myself binge eating.

    Are your restrictive phases too restrictive? Are you punishing yourself with weight loss?

    Try turning that thinking around and planning a smaller deficit. When I went back to a smaller deficit, my binge problems stopped.

    By restrictive, I just mean the 1,200 calorie setting on MFP. I run around 3-4 miles a day with a long run (6-7 miles) once a week, so I usually end up eating more than 1,200 total. I will use MFP and then feel deprived or something I guess, and then just go hog wild on my entire pantry.

    What do you want to lose? 10-15 pounds? Set your weight loss goal to a half pound per week and eat back at least 50% of the calories you earn from exercise.

    Most people who end up with 1200 calories are getting it inappropriately. 1200 calories is for women who are very short, old, or sedentary, none of which describes you.

    @WinoGelato is two inches shorter than you, 20 years older, and has lost weight eating more than 1200 calories.

  • VonHocker08
    VonHocker08 Posts: 26 Member
    Getting enough fat early on in the day really helps me not have cravings at all.