Out of control.

jacquitz

My daughter just had a baby six weeks ago so I feel for you... and totally get your chaos.

This is what I would say if you were my daughter:
1. reach out for help... from a friend, a relative, a mother's helper, anyone who can be there with you and your baby, at least part of each day. If they can't be there in person, face time with them.
2. make a protein drink first thing in the morning with at least 50 grams of protein in it (i use protein powder and egg whites) and drink it throughout the morning. you will be amazed how this fills you up and ends those blood sugar crashes you get from trying to "diet" at this vulnerable time.
3. breastfeed! the more you can do this the more calories you will burn, the more antibodies you will provide your infant, and the more bonding time you will have with your little one.
4. give yourself permission to not think about weight for at least three months. focus instead on eating lots of protein and gently recovering from birth. Use the macronutrients measure on this website, and focus on making yourself eat enough protein every day rather than worrying about cutting back on something else. you will be shocked how just that attitude adjustment turns your head around ... my trainer had me change my percentages to 40 % protein, 40 % (good) fats and 20% carbs to build muscle and reduce body fat. It's working.
5. get a basic baby bjorn carrier, put your adorable child on your chest and take long walks, in the morning, the afternoon, the evening. breathe, breathe, breathe.
oxox

laur357

Many schools offer their students nutrition support and counseling. You may want to look into that. They can help you build a plan to manage your busy life and offer support to help you get back in control.

lemurcat12

AliceDark wrote: »

It sounds like you have a ton of stress and anxiety going on, and it's going to be difficult to deal with any of the superficial eating issues without also taking care of the underlying stress. That's not to say that you need to share what's going on with strangers on the internet, but it is to say that it's going to be helpful for you to find ways to handle it.

This was my thought too.

Some things that might also be helpful:

Make sure your calorie goal is not too low. If that means starting at maintenance and moving down, until you feel in control, that's totally okay. Don't jump into 2 lb/week or some really low goal. Also, if you are breastfeeding remember you need to include those calories, and it might be a good reason to talk to a dietitian if you can get a referral.

Plan meals and have food available. Make sure you are eating plenty of food (having a plate loaded with vegetables so it looks like I am eating even more than I ever did helped me when I started). If it comforts you, having raw veg or some berries for between planned meals can help.

Decide how many times and when you enjoy eating. Try to stick to a consistent schedule. If your schedule means you may miss meals (I had this issue when I started), then plan and bring along food.

If you start feeling worried about hunger, remind yourself that it's only X until the next meal, think about how it will be enjoyable, and that you really can't be bothered by waiting just that amount of time. Have raw veg or water or coffee or something if you want.

Try to walk if you start feeling antsy (I realize that depending on what you are doing it might not be possible, but it can help with stress). Other options are listening to music, journaling (journaling actually really helped me when I started), and just forcing yourself to stay in the moment and feel the feelings -- not as scary as it may seem. Prayer/mediation or just deep breaths can help if you do that.

One thing that makes it harder can be a lack of sleep and you probably can't do anything about that now, so just knowing that your body sometimes craves food as a way to get energy/wake up can be helpful to understand -- it's being tired, not real hunger. This is one way I used journaling -- writing about it when I felt a desire to eat and understanding what was going on.

Good luck, and I am sure you will figure this out, and absolutely don't feel like you can't ask for help.

JeromeBarry1

@alexanderislove I infer from your opening post that you are trying to lose weight with a very low calorie diet.

Am I correct in this?

LiftandSkate

Intermittent fasting helped me get over my fear of hunger, and got me in touch with true hunger. I learned that my hunger is not an emergency, and learned to resist that constant voice in my head telling me to EAT EVERYTHING. It ultimately wasn't a good long term fit for me, but it was a very valuable step in my process. You have to be careful with it to make sure it's not triggering binges for you, but it's something I highly recommend exploring when practiced with a lot of self - love and compassion.

lynn_andress

From mom to mom.
I know you probabaly want to rush losing weight, but it wasn't until my son was over the 6 month mark that I was finally able to get my hunger under control. Having a baby takes a lot out of your body and most of us don't have chefs and trainers to help whip us back into shape after having a baby.
I nurse, so I still get that feeling of NEEDING to eat after feeding my guy, but maybe take this time to simply track your habits and, if it's not too stressful, when you're eating and level of hunger. I did that for about a month before actively trying to lose weight. That helped me to see where I could "easily" cut back or make lower calorie substitutions that wouldn't take any more time or effort to make/get/eat. You'll also get more into the habit of just tracking and not stressing if you go a bit over. Even if you lose .25lbs a week instead of half a pound or 2, you'll still be making your way to a healthier you and I bet just feeling successful in this regard (since it seems you've been successful in a lot of other ways) will make it feel good to keep plugging away at it.
Sorry about the super wordy response.
Stay hydrated. Rest. And good luck!

cross2bear

I think your head is telling you lies, and you have to learn to recognize them!

How likely is it that you are going to die if you dont eat RIGHT NOW?
How likely is it that you are going to die if you dont eat in the next hour? Two hours? 12 hours?

My guess is pretty darn slim to nil - what you are facing is really bad habits, but even those can be adjusted.

If I can be excused the analogy, its like being an alcoholic - you wont die (but you will feel like it) if you dont get a drink in the next few moments, or hours. People can overcome this addiction, and you can overcome this habit too.

Previous posters have given great advice - planplanplan your meals, so you KNOW that there is another meal or snack coming up in whatever time you decide. Have healthy snacks for those moments when the urges get the better of you. Use the resources of MFP to ensure that you are eating appropriately for your goals, and not depriving yourself when you dont need to - this can be a lengthy process and you need to pace yourself. But mostly, I really want to emphasize how important it is to get feedback from someone you trust, so speaking to a professional through student services sounds like a terrific idea, if only for a couple of sessions to reassure you that you will get through this and come out the other side as the person you want to be, both for you and for your son.

Come back and tell us how you are making out, as we all wish you the bet.

lacandona

Make sure your calories arent set too low. Graze through the day.

Also, I had fertility problems and through those found out I have a genetic mutation that prevents me from absorbing certain vitamins. Once I started taking proper vitamins that allowed me to absorb what I couldn't before, my hunger levels went WAY down. Are you taking good vitamins? You should still take prenatals while nursing.

Take it easy on yourself, love yourself and enjoy your time with your new sweetie!