19yo and At least 400lbs--looking for some support
swagmasterTswag
Posts: 3 Member
So this is my first post here. I've had a MyFitnessPal account for some time now. Every once-and-awhile I'll get into a small fitness tinge, but nothing really major at all. I'll start off with giving you all a concise version of my story.
I'm from a mid-sized town called Paducah, KY. About exactly halfway between St. Louis, MO and Nashville, TN. You may have heard of it, but probably not.
I'm 19 years old, graduated high-school by the skin of my teeth, and dropped out of college after my freshman year, partly because I was somehow suddenly awful at math (even after being in honors math classes between 6th and 11th grades), but also partly because I just felt I didn't need it. Now, three months and countless ventures and countless anxiety induced restless nights later, I'm currently a web designer and videographer for a local marketing startup, and the future is looking bright. In almost every way really, except for my health.
I've always been big, but I think I got lucky and always had it pretty easy throughout life from a social standpoint. Never really bullied at all; In fact, quite the opposite. In my high school I was in student government, ran pep-rallies, etc. When I got to college at Northern Kentucky University in Greater Cincinnati, I pledged one of the most well-known fraternities on campus in my spring semester and was the first-ever unanimous vote-in in the chapter's 36-year history. I was vice-president of the economics club and worked for the IT department on-campus. Needless to say, I've always been known, and being very recognizable, as a bigger guy, definitely helped.
But it never really helped me lose weight, for some reason. In fact, it may have hurt me.
I've never really felt pressured to change, at all. I've been known as the "big guy" my entire life. My pediatrician growing up told me that it was the craziest thing she'd ever seen. I was the first patient that she'd ever had that was massively overweight, but in perfect health internally. That was the case all the way up until about 2 years ago when I was diagnosed with high blood pressure. At this point, a normal doctor, not a pediatrician, and she was definitely concerned. I believe at the time I was close to 450lbs. Going to college really helped, surprisingly. With how much walking was required to get around campus, It was probably inevitable. I haven't really been to the doctor in a while, but I would say I dropped close to 25lbs within a couple of months of being on-campus, living independently of my family.
I definitely think that aspect helped a bit as well. Whenever I would try to begin eating healthy, I would essentially have to eat by myself because nobody else in the family wanted to eat the things that I was cooking that were much healthier for me. This would essentially lead to my mom being mad because household food costs were rising (cooking 2 different meals every meal, basically), and we would all go back to our old ways of eating, which, most of the time, were rather unhealthy.
I know the basics of getting healthy: More out than in, track your macros, and don't be sedentary.
As a web designer and videographer, that's not the easiest thing in the world to do. When I'm not out filming, I'm sitting in front of a computer editing footage or designing webpages.
I'm looking to make changes, lifelong changes, NOW, before it permanently affects my lifespan more than it already has. But I KNOW I can't do them without some sort of support network. I've tried doing things on my own in the past, and the longest it's lasted was maybe a few weeks, and never resulted in anything at all.
One of my biggest weaknesses is that I love food. I'm definitely a foodie. When I was little, instead of watching cartoons, I would watch Food Network. Instead of playing outside until dinner was ready, I would come in and watch my mom or grandma cook. I'm definitely well above average skill-wise for someone my age as far as cooking abilities go.
Lately, I've been just not feeling well at all. Very tired and down, definitely some bouts of depression and just not wanting to talk to people at all. It has some due in part to being 250 miles from most of my friends now that I've dropped out of college, but also to do definitely in part with my diet. I know that if I can get my diet right, everything will start falling back into place.
I want to start with what goes in, because I know as big as I am, my RMR is higher than average, which means that I can lose lots of weight very quickly in the beginning without even changing my activity levels at all. I also know that If I eat right, my energy levels will rise, which will give me more and more energy and motivation to get up and go exercise, even if it is just walking a mile or two.
I just needed to get my story out there, and I need some sort of support group of people that can hold me accountable, because self-accountability is definitely not one of my strong suits at 19.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Talon Lister
I'm from a mid-sized town called Paducah, KY. About exactly halfway between St. Louis, MO and Nashville, TN. You may have heard of it, but probably not.
I'm 19 years old, graduated high-school by the skin of my teeth, and dropped out of college after my freshman year, partly because I was somehow suddenly awful at math (even after being in honors math classes between 6th and 11th grades), but also partly because I just felt I didn't need it. Now, three months and countless ventures and countless anxiety induced restless nights later, I'm currently a web designer and videographer for a local marketing startup, and the future is looking bright. In almost every way really, except for my health.
I've always been big, but I think I got lucky and always had it pretty easy throughout life from a social standpoint. Never really bullied at all; In fact, quite the opposite. In my high school I was in student government, ran pep-rallies, etc. When I got to college at Northern Kentucky University in Greater Cincinnati, I pledged one of the most well-known fraternities on campus in my spring semester and was the first-ever unanimous vote-in in the chapter's 36-year history. I was vice-president of the economics club and worked for the IT department on-campus. Needless to say, I've always been known, and being very recognizable, as a bigger guy, definitely helped.
But it never really helped me lose weight, for some reason. In fact, it may have hurt me.
I've never really felt pressured to change, at all. I've been known as the "big guy" my entire life. My pediatrician growing up told me that it was the craziest thing she'd ever seen. I was the first patient that she'd ever had that was massively overweight, but in perfect health internally. That was the case all the way up until about 2 years ago when I was diagnosed with high blood pressure. At this point, a normal doctor, not a pediatrician, and she was definitely concerned. I believe at the time I was close to 450lbs. Going to college really helped, surprisingly. With how much walking was required to get around campus, It was probably inevitable. I haven't really been to the doctor in a while, but I would say I dropped close to 25lbs within a couple of months of being on-campus, living independently of my family.
I definitely think that aspect helped a bit as well. Whenever I would try to begin eating healthy, I would essentially have to eat by myself because nobody else in the family wanted to eat the things that I was cooking that were much healthier for me. This would essentially lead to my mom being mad because household food costs were rising (cooking 2 different meals every meal, basically), and we would all go back to our old ways of eating, which, most of the time, were rather unhealthy.
I know the basics of getting healthy: More out than in, track your macros, and don't be sedentary.
As a web designer and videographer, that's not the easiest thing in the world to do. When I'm not out filming, I'm sitting in front of a computer editing footage or designing webpages.
I'm looking to make changes, lifelong changes, NOW, before it permanently affects my lifespan more than it already has. But I KNOW I can't do them without some sort of support network. I've tried doing things on my own in the past, and the longest it's lasted was maybe a few weeks, and never resulted in anything at all.
One of my biggest weaknesses is that I love food. I'm definitely a foodie. When I was little, instead of watching cartoons, I would watch Food Network. Instead of playing outside until dinner was ready, I would come in and watch my mom or grandma cook. I'm definitely well above average skill-wise for someone my age as far as cooking abilities go.
Lately, I've been just not feeling well at all. Very tired and down, definitely some bouts of depression and just not wanting to talk to people at all. It has some due in part to being 250 miles from most of my friends now that I've dropped out of college, but also to do definitely in part with my diet. I know that if I can get my diet right, everything will start falling back into place.
I want to start with what goes in, because I know as big as I am, my RMR is higher than average, which means that I can lose lots of weight very quickly in the beginning without even changing my activity levels at all. I also know that If I eat right, my energy levels will rise, which will give me more and more energy and motivation to get up and go exercise, even if it is just walking a mile or two.
I just needed to get my story out there, and I need some sort of support group of people that can hold me accountable, because self-accountability is definitely not one of my strong suits at 19.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Talon Lister
28
Replies
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My first piece of advice is to lose mental weight. That T-shirt you hate, that stupid broken coat, that laptop you said you were going to rebuild, 5 years ago, etc. You'll feel SOO much more free.10
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You are in the right place and your mind set indicates you are ready to do this.
There are many far wiser than me that will be able to give you far better advice than I can, but I had to comment on this post.
Congratulations on taking this first step.
Much love
E2 -
You got this! You seem to have the mindset and that is most important. All I can say is small steps, I have gained and lost almost 100 pounds 3 times. This last time I have done it one part at a time. First I worked on my diet for a whole month. Then I added exercises at home for 3 months. Then I moved on to the gym. I'm 75 pounds down with 15 more to go. Most of all be kind to yourself!7
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You can do it mate, I started at 440 pounds.
I have lost about 130 pounds up to now
I could not walk up the stairs without being out of breath
Routine is the key!
10 bits of fruit & veg a day. No chocolate, no crisps, plenty of water 2Litres+.
Brazil nuts, cashews etc... small amounts as highly calorific but will stave of cravings
I now run 5K twice a week - albeit slowly but I complete it in one hit and I am lapping those still sat on the couch.
Get yourself a step counter - Fitbit are ok but the basic Jawbone Up has a battery that lasts for months and you can clip it to your shoes.
Log everything in MFP
Link your fitness tracker software to MFP
Eat - yes eat your exercise calories back.... slowly losing weight is the key.
The thousand mile journey starts with one step.
Go for it8 -
Feel free to add me. I log every day.2
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Hi Talon. After reading your post the thing that struck me was that you have so much going for you because of your level headed and mature outlook. The fact that you enjoy healthy food and are a good cook will mean you will not feel deprived or bored on your weight loss journey.
Firstly I would advise having a check up with your doctor before you start losing weight. Put your stats into MFP to get your calorie allowance. Buy a digital food scale and measure everything in grams - no cups as they are not accurate enough for solid and semi-solid food.
I feel really excited for you because I know you can do the job!
I'm an older person [68] in the UK but would be pleased to support you on here if you want to add me as a friend
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you sound like you have a good mindset for this which is great, although be aware that this may well become a bumpy ride, especially if you find yourself tinged with depression. Getting outside will help somewhat with this, but keep an eye on it.
Don't try and drop your calories too quickly - as you say yourself, the weight will come off quickly at first, but just set a reasonable manageable deficit that doesn't make you starving and work on sticking to that. You enjoy food, so find some great healthy and fresh recipes you can create - for me, half the fun of losing weight is creating fresh delicious meals myself.
I favour just three meals a day and no snacks - this means my meals each can be filling and satisfying and full of great ingredients. If I snack, it tends not to satisfy me and I'd rather wait a little longer for a fuller meal.
Get walking. Maybe try and set yourself a target of half an hour around the block every evening. Your job won't help, but try and walk as much during the day - get up to talk to people as much as you can. More intense exercise can come later.
You are far from your old friends, sure, but what about new friends? Do you have a chance to make some friends, maybe find a hobby that involves some form of exercise to make new friends?
Keep logging here and checking in here - there's a lot of good advice and support floating around
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You can do it mate!! Stick to the basics and be positive nothing is impossible!! Feel free to add me. Start with small steps one day they will reach you to top. all the best.1
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Small steps, Start by logging everything that you eat & drink, be honest when you log because the only person you'll be lying to is yourself. Keep your diary private until you feel comfortable with people seeing what you're eating because opening it up takes a lot of courage but is, i believe, something that helps a lot with the mindset. For me that felt like I was confirming my commitment to my lifestyle change.
Just remember it's not plain sailing and you'll find it difficult at times. The trick is picking yourself up and carrying on. Or putting it in a way my age addled brain works "I'm just too stupid to know when to quit"1 -
You can do it!
Start slow. Log what you eat right now. You're probably not at your computer working every minute that you're up... so use that time wisely. Go for a walk. Buy an exercise bike and hop on it while watching TV. Use your cooking skills towards lower calorie meals (check skinnytaste.com).
Best of luck!0 -
Congratulations on starting your journey. It really is as simple as eating in a caloric deficit, getting adequate protein and doing whatever exercise you can. Remember that you didn't gain the weight over night so it won't come off overnight.0
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Go for it. I am on day 3 of a 100 day challenge. Start with keeping track of every last thing you eat, and weigh it if you can. Otherwise get glad or some other brand cheap containers in the 8 and 4 oz size and dump your food in them. When that amount is gone...your done, no more. And try pacing while working on the computer, just a little bit of movement is better than none. Good luck, I will check in on you again.0
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I started out at 368lbs, I've lost ~70lbs so far. All you need to do is count calories. There's no reason to try and restrict, no real need for exercise yet (I injured my knees exercising at my highest weight).
If you can, purchase a food scale and weigh the things you eat. Choose the correct entries in the database and log them. If it doesn't hurt your knees, just get up and walk around a little.3 -
Everyone has given you great tips and support.
As far as your mom complaining about extra meals, perhaps you can purchase some healthy items of your own to supplement or exchange in for the family menu.
As everyone has said, all it takes is a deficit, but, you can add veggies and fruit to your diet when you cut down on the more calorific items on the family menu.
Like if there's fried potatoes or pasta on the menu, you can eat less of that and more of roasted veggies or salad. Your salad can be chock full of yummy veggies!
Instead of a sugary dessert everyday, you can have your favorite fruit! And if you want a sugary dessert, just make sure it fits into your daily calorie allowance! I've lost while indulging my chocolate mania-just fit it in!
You will be pleasantly surprised at how much better you'll feel with the food additions and with starting to walk every day. Drink lots of water!
When you start losing, you'll be so happy! Remember everyday how important this journey is to your healthy future! It might be uncomfortable for your Mom/family to see these changes in you, but you just keep on doing the best for you! At 19, you don't want to be on medications for the rest of your life when you can make yourself well through eating and moving your body!
You can and will succeed!
One more thing, if you have some difficult times (and we all do), when you may overeat, just keep going!
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You're off to an awesome start! Keep on going, one day at a time.
I'd love to be friends with you!0 -
Glad that you are starting to get healthier now.
Sending you a friend's request.0 -
You are definitely in the right place. Good for you for taking these steps while you are young. Without changing what you eat, if you eat less calories per day, the weight will come off. Best wishes...you can do this!0
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You've come to the right place and it sounds like you are ready to do this. Start out small and build from there. Little changes make a huge difference. If you try to do everything at once, it can become a little overwhelming. Feel free to add me for a friend if you were looking for some support.
Cheers,
Rachel0 -
Wow man - after reading this it definitely sounds like your head is in the right place and you are ready to do this. I have a similar story but wasn't carrying as much weight, I had a health scare that woke me up and I changed my ways and lost nearly 100 lbs in a very short amount of time. I, like you, joined this site and " lurked " for a very long time but getting involved is very important, I can't tell you what to do only what I did. When I decided it was time for a change I literally read and watched everything I could about health and nutrition - I would recommend getting a Netflix account and watching Forks Over Knives, Fat Sick and Nearly Dead, GMO OMG and all the other documentaries about food and nutrition, it certainly scared me into making a change. I am now Plant Based and running half marathons, granted most people don't do things as dramatically as I did, making a 180 degree change in lifestyle but that is what I had to do, I can't do things 50, 75, or 90%. I started by walking to the end of the street and back, then a mile, then two, then 7 and 8 and then I realized " Hey, this would go a lot quicker if I ran " and that's what I did. Dude - you are amazing, I am proud of you - people like you inspire me in more ways than you can imagine, welcome to the club and good luck on your journey - it won't be easy but it will be worth it.
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You can do this. I started at almost 390 and am now 190. It takes time and effort but it can be done. You seem to be in a good mindset to do this which is 99% of the battle IMO.0
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I was going to suggest, you have a job now and are making money, why not contribute to the family eating expenses. Or even just do some of your own shopping. And you can still eat what your family is cooking, just make some healthier sides and eat less of the other things. That way its not completely separate meals and who knows, maybe other family members will want to join in. Also, since your a good cook (not a gene I got) maybe you could search out alternative recipes for your family to try that are similar to what they already eat but lower in calorie and take over the cooking from your mom a couple nights a week.1
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MalkinMagic71 wrote: »You can do this. I started at almost 390 and am now 190. It takes time and effort but it can be done. You seem to be in a good mindset to do this which is 99% of the battle IMO.
I remember reading @MalkinMagic71 log on here somewhere and would be a good read for you OP. Inspirational1 -
I know where Paducah, KY, is! I went to school in Evansville, IN. Welcome, friend.
It sounds like you have a good job that you enjoy, which is great for mental health. If your job causes you to sit a lot (mine does), see if you can use or get a standing desk. If those aren't available to you, it will be up to you to find solutions and patterns that work. You could go for a walk at lunch; it's nice this time of year, but in winter you could walk around the building or up and down the stairs. I joined a gym right next to where I work because I knew that I would never get myself there after commuting home.
You say self-accountability is not your strong suit. Me either! Can you get a dog? A dog will force you to get up and walk him/her, so you get some exercise. They are also great companions and will love you even when you have a binge day or are ready to give up.
Be easy on yourself, at least at the start. Make small changes, one a week or one a month. Start with just logging your calories every day without trying to restrict so you can see where to make changes. Try switching sugary beverages out for water or tea. Just take a walk around the block instead. If it's hard to meet people, join some online groups, like you have here. Incremental change is change that can actually last. Once you see some improvements, you will find the internal motivation to keep going.
It's not easy to be accountable to just yourself. Much of it comes down to willpower. Are you in charge of your diet, or is your diet in charge of you? Who is more stubborn? What good comes of eating a whole bag of chips instead of carrots? You can open your diary and ask some MFP people to look at it weekly, maybe even ask you questions.
When you are 29 or 39, you will have wished DEARLY that you had started at 19. Be accountable to that person and to the spouse and kids you hope to have and be an example for (if that is your thing).
Best of luck to you. We are all here for you. This is a very supportive and encouraging place.
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Dude. You're smart and you know what you gotta do. Just keep truckin' on your journey. Keep winning that mental battle and make the choices you need to make for your health. I can't wait to hear more about your story as it unfolds.0
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You can do it. I once carried 335 pounds on this 5'2" body. Am I still over weight? Sure...its a constant struggle. But I am far from where I was...and working to get to where I need to be. Anyone feel free to add me
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It takes a dedicated mental change first then the rest will slowly follow. Just keep reminding yourself, you're sick and tired of always feeling sick and tired! Good luck to you. Free free to add me if you like. 0
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Dear Talon, your story touched me. You are correct that losing weight will lift your mood. I am down 60 pounds with another 35 to go. I am amazed at the changes I see in myself. I'm 60 years old so suffered from my weight induced issues both with my health and my mental state most of my life. I have dieted countless times. This time was different because I decided to set a reasonable goal (which I have lowered three times, lol) and to find a way to eat things I like but in smaller quantities. Now don't misunderstand, I do eat more healthy but if I want sour cream on my potato I have a small one with a tablespoon or two and I count it in my total calories. I can live this way the rest of my life. All those crash diets I did.... no chance, I rarely lost more than 20 pounds on any of them. I started to walk. Not speeed walking or miles at a time. I just decided to do something I liked and I like to walk. No one can tell you exactly what to do but there are many on these forums who can advise when you have a question and you CAN do it. I agree that getting your diet right first will help. That's how I started and I didn't really walk until 3 months in. By then I was feeling better and I started really slow. I'm still only doing 8000 steps a day (that's my goal, sometimes I exceed it) but I made it a part of my routine. Good luck and don't give up.0
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This can be a fun challenge for a foodie You are heavy enough that you don't need to drastically cut your calories in order to lose weight. Find healthy recipes and use the mfp recipe builder. That way, you know exactly what you're eating, and if it's yummy and you fix it again, you can easily log it. I didn't have as much to lose as you, but I found it really fun to find new recipes and work to stay within my goal. It wasn't as hard as I expected, but that's because I love to cook, and I love good food. Take your time. Learn as you go. You're very wise to begin now while you're young. Congratulations on all of your sucesses so far! You can do this! 1
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Hey there! Continue to keep your heap and keep that positive mind frame. It's really hard to always stay positive when trying to lose weight. Can't wait to see you get to your goals! 0
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Hi! Based on your outlook and post, I already know you CAN do this. You clearly understand what needs to change in your life and that's awesome id love to be friends with you on this journey! 0
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