How you stay motivated LONG TERM?

gabbyo23

So I have lost 1 stone 6lb so far but still have another 3 stone to lose. I'm at that point where I can see a small difference in my appearance but others haven't noticed yet.

I know the only way to do this is slowly. But I find myself thinking "God this is taking forever..." and feeling like giving up.

I think ahead to Xmas and think if I stay on track, I'll lose but I'll still be hugely overweight.

I have a horrible habit of negative thinking and bringing myself down.

So I'm just asking how those of you who have kept going for ages have stayed motivated?

Thank you!

kommodevaran

By not relying on "motivation", instead making it easy and fun: Planning meals so I can eat food I like in appropriate amounts, moving daily instead of planned exercise, getting enough sleep and managing stress and anxiety. We have to to eat and live anyway, no need to think anything takes forever, everything takes the time it takes. If you think weight loss is slow, be prepared for maintenance to take the rest of your life.

dutchandkiwi

By ooking bac and see the difference in old pictures and vowing never to go there again
But also I allow myself some off days per year and one maintenance stretch (the latter is usually my holiday) Where I do log as best as I can but focus on staying within my maintenance goal, which is obviously higher than my usual deficit.
The days off are scheduled in so I can look forward to them (Christmas is one) as some kind of little holiday
As said I still log them as to not loose my habit, but the logging is also more loose (less weighing) No guilty feelings, just savoring the moment. It seems to give me the energy to keep going after that little indulgence again.

subakwa

By saying this is it. This is me now, not a thing I am doing.

I am nearly 5 st down but loss has definitely slowed recently and that is tough. I won't be at target by Christmas, which I had hoped, but the improvements already are brilliant. I have been able to do far more things with my kids and I look much better, so even though I am not there (another 2st to go) it is already paying off.

Find the good things and know they'll just keep on getting better.

xX_PhoenixRising_Xx

It might seem like it's taking ages, but where will you be in a month or a year if you give up now? Slow progress is better than no progress. That's what kept me going, and I've lost 70 kg or so.

VintageFeline

Well you could give up and just stay where you are.

OR, as someone said, you switch your mindset to "this is what I do now" and just keep trucking. In a year you'll reflect back and be amazed at how quickly that year went and how far you've come.

I'm 4 stone down since the start of last year, I could never have imagined I'd have come that far if I had dwelled on it too long. Another couple to go but there's no rush as I do think of it as just what I do and who I am now. The losses fall where they may.

kimteale93

gabbyo23 wrote: »

So I have lost 1 stone 6lb so far but still have another 3 stone to lose. I'm at that point where I can see a small difference in my appearance but others haven't noticed yet.

I know the only way to do this is slowly. But I find myself thinking "God this is taking forever..." and feeling like giving up.

I think ahead to Xmas and think if I stay on track, I'll lose but I'll still be hugely overweight.

I have a horrible habit of negative thinking and bringing myself down.

So I'm just asking how those of you who have kept going for ages have stayed motivated?

Thank you!

I have a very horrible before picture and I keep it close to remind me of where I've come from and where I don't want to be again.... so far I'm 14 weeks in and list 2 stone 4lb

elisa123gal

Nothing wrong with being honest and saying it is getting hard to keep at it.. However, admitting that is okay..giving up is not. You have some good advice here. If you're getting bored and unhappy with the long haul.. start making some changes to your diet. Find new recipes and foods to make your diet seem not like a diet. Why not have a cheat meal once a week? It may slow down your progress but make things more easy to manage. Try new exercise. I think taking progress pictures and looking at those help also.

It is natural to feel like .. blah... who wants to keep doing this. WE all have days like that. Just push through ..keep at it. that is what separates successful people from those on the other side.

leahkathleen13

Even when I don't reach my goals in a time that I wish for, I imagine how things would be if I wasn't trying. Health is wealth and I highly value it, so I keep trying. I also try new things to keep it interesting. New foods and new activities! Fun!

Instead of thinking of a loss as a number, I think if it as a change of habits and patterns. That takes time, determination, patience. I mess up a lot but just keep trying.

rightoncommander

First of all, 1st 6lb loss is really good! You're already doing well!

How do you feel? Are you happier, or have you lost this much weight by denying yourself constantly?

If you're already happier, you don't need to stay motivated! All you need to do is recognise the bad habits that you've given up, and commit to not doing them any more. They didn't make you any happier anyway. And just decide to keep going with your current healthy habits.

If you are constantly hungry and miserable with your weight loss, you need to totally change how you're losing weight, probably take it a lot slower, and make changes to your diet and exercise that you can make permanent. This is a marathon, not a sprint. 3st sounds like a lot, but even at 1/2lb per week, you'll hit target weight after 18 months. And stay there forever, because after 18 months of doing it right, you'll have a healthy diet and exercise, and people with healthy habits don't put weight on!

Machka9

Personally, I decided to stick with it for 16 weeks ... and I stuck with it like glue for 16 weeks.

I lost 15 kg.

Then I took a 1-month break to decide what I wanted to do next.

I decided to stick with it like glue for another 16 weeks.

I lost another 11 kg.

26 kg = 56 lbs = 4 stone.

Two periods of 16 weeks each wasn't forever and as I lost weight I started doing more things ... cycling longer distances, walking further and faster. And I finished the first two university courses toward my Grad Certificate at the same time.

girlinahat

For me my focus has been on fitness rather than a number on a scale. So I made a decision to lose weight, but as you know, that is a very very hard target to track and keep motivated by.

My goals then are these:

To eat delicious, fresh and nutritious meals. That may include burgers and chips.

Result – I am seeking out new recipes using plenty of vegetables, and balancing my macros. On the way I have discovered I am the sort of person who needs protein in the mornings, and will happily chomp away on less carb heavy meals, but will sometimes need to ‘carb-load’ once a week or so.

To get fitter – I took up running, and have surprised myself by really enjoying it and firmly identifying as a runner. I aim to run 2/3 times a week with an off-road half marathon planned for Spring. Then I want to get back on my bike.

Result – I am on target, have completed a few races, and have joined a running club who are taking me in the dark through fields and woods, when I might be tempted to stay home. I’m doing Stronglifts over the winter months as have heard that this is a great way of improving running strength, plus I seem to have primarily lost weight in my butt which makes my silhouette look sad.

To have more energy and feel better – I am careful to fuel my workouts. I eat all of my exercise calories given by my fitbit, and feel pleasantly tired at the end of the day. My morning workouts whilst difficult to do at 6am, by 6.30am I am feeling ready for the day ahead.

Result – I am slowly getting there. There are days where I feel sluggish. Those days tell me I probably have overdone it either on the exercise, so I might skip a workout, or I haven’t eaten enough, so I choose something healthy to fuel me. I have never been a junk food addict so am more likely to have a yoghurt or similar to keep me going. There are also days where I feel bloated. This tells me I have made some bad food choices, maybe that heavily processed nutritionally empty pizza wasn’t such a good idea, and I make better choices next time (like the sourdough pizza from the artisan place down the road)

Maybe think of some non-weight related motivation to keep you going? You’ve done well so far and don’t forget it!

crzycatlady1

You need to take a step back and look at the big picture. It terms of time-the weight loss phase is for a fairly short period. You're looking at a few months to a couple years. That's nothing compared to the 20, 30, 40+ years of maintenance which comes after, which is where most people fail. If you're serious about this then you need to realize that this is going to be a part of your life in one way or another, for forever.

It's so important to learn now how to do things in a sustainable and realistic way that you can continue doing for the rest of your life. Focus on learning how portion sizes work, how to continue eating the foods you enjoy, but in the correct calorie amounts, how to handle social events and eating out, how to stay in control of your weight in the midst of life changes like sickness, stressful situations etc. Right now you're building an arsenal of tools to use in the future. These will give you a much better chance at success down the road. Remember-weight loss means nothing if you don't keep it off, so use this time now as you're losing weight to learn how to be successful for years to come

(eta: I've been maintaining a 50lb loss for around 4 years now).

CattOfTheGarage

By saying to myself, even staying at this weight would be better than gaining it back. I am less likely to get diabetes now than I was last Christmas, and maintaining at this weight is better than getting heavier every week, which is what would happen if I gave up. Losing weight and eventually reaching low "overweight" or even "normal" will be great if I manage it, but staying "obese" is better than becoming morbidly obese, suffering the health complications and probably dying young, and don't kid yourself, that's what "giving up" means. And tracking my food every day is easier and preferable to managing diabetes or living with other complications of obesity.

I will never be someone who can ignore what I eat and stay the same weight. I've accepted that fact, so it's a straight choice - watch what I eat, or gain. I do not want to be heavier.

Eta I also echo what others have said about eating things I enjoy that keep me full. Find joy in food. You can't white knuckle it or at some point you become like king canute trying to hold back the tide. Give yourself treats, have fun foods, accept that you'll eat more than you mean to sometimes and don't beat yourself up. Persistence beats perfection every time.

Francl27

I don't make it a chore. I still eat things I like, do activities I like (and being able to do them better at time went was great too)... I adjust my diet so I'm not hungry all the time (that's the main thing for me) and, for me, still being fat was (is?) a huge motivator - I wanted to see what I would look like thin!

To be honest though - for me giving up has never been an option. Even now (2.5 years into maintenance), I still slip up sometimes, but I'm never giving up. I don't want to be fat. I like being able to wear what I want (to some extent). I like being able to hike for 4 hours without being winded (typically, my legs get tired first now). I like not losing my breath when I bend over. I like being able to fit between things or go on a ride and not worry about whether I'm going to be able to buckle myself in or wondering before any social situation if I'm going to be embarrassed about my weight.

But really, again, I don't make it a chore. I still eat what I like. I still indulge occasionally. But it's not an every day thing and most days I still keep a deficit to make up for that. Truth is, I don't usually have the desire to stuff my face again anyway, because the guilt that follows is just not worth it.

vanmep

I once heard an interview with a woman who made the comment that she had decided to go to law school because the next ten years of her life were going to pass by regardless of what she did with the time. She just decided that ten years from that time she could either have a law degree or not have a law degree. That idea totally resonated with me and I used it to motivate myself to attend university part-time for 11 years. I use that thought to also keep me going with weight loss. That, and the idea that this is just who I am and what I do now. There isn't really a choice about it. I hated that life of being fat and slow and sluggish and bloated and gross. It is beyond me why it even crosses my mind to think I would want to return to that.

jennifer_417

Motivation is a feeling that comes and goes. Real, lasting weight loss comes from making changes and making them stick. It's not an event, it's a lifestyle.

MostlyWater

You don't. It's discipline.

cwolfman13

I stopped focusing on weight loss as the be all and end all...I started focusing on my overall health and fitness...the rest takes care of itself.

Motivation is an emotion...you're never going to be motivated 100% of the time. Are you always motivated to clean your bathroom or vacuum your house or do the dishes or whatever? Do you do it anyway? Why?

vanmep

Are you always motivated to clean your bathroom or vacuum your house or do the dishes or whatever? Do you do it anyway? Why?

This reminds me of something my husband tells me when I have to do something I don't want to do. He tells me, "The only thing worse than cleaning the toilet is not cleaning the toilet." Same for a healthy lifestyle.

capaul42

You won't always be motivated. Motivation is short term at best. You need to be determined to keep on keeping on. Or, like me, incredibly stubborn. I never thought about how long it would take me. I made goals for myself that weren't about the weight loss, fitness goals are great like that.

ashcky

I make small goals, not even always related to the scale. When I accomplish these I feel more encouraged and proud of myself. That the journey may be long but I can do this. This is just my life now. I'm not going back to who I was, that's not an option. I like the me I'm becoming even if it will take me a long time to finally get to a healthy weight.

Red_Pill

Motivation is fleeting. It comes and goes. It's not something that's grounded enough to sustain the course of a goal, for most people anyway. You have to have a Why. Your why has to pull you towards your goal rather than you chasing the goal. That's how powerful a why can be if it's compelling enough.

Machka9

vanmep wrote: »

I once heard an interview with a woman who made the comment that she had decided to go to law school because the next ten years of her life were going to pass by regardless of what she did with the time. She just decided that ten years from that time she could either have a law degree or not have a law degree. That idea totally resonated with me and I used it to motivate myself to attend university part-time for 11 years. I use that thought to also keep me going with weight loss. That, and the idea that this is just who I am and what I do now. There isn't really a choice about it. I hated that life of being fat and slow and sluggish and bloated and gross. It is beyond me why it even crosses my mind to think I would want to return to that.

And that is the way I approached it. I was going to stick with it for 16 weeks because 16 weeks were going to pass anyway and if I only lost a few kg, that would be better than nothing.

arditarose

I have goals set. When I'm losing weight I have mini loss goals, but I need fitness and body composition goals as well. Sometimes it's a cut, bulk, power lifting meet prep, programming to be able to do a pull-up, PRs, booty gains, etc. Right now there aren't any powerlifting meets available near me, so I scheduled a mock meet in December. Looking forward to testing my maxes! I'm also working toward being able to do a pull up.

85Cardinals

my dominatrix/personal trainer, Mistress Trixi

jenilla1

I've got 5 years in maintenance so far. Not sure I have an explanation for it. I guess it's just a habit now. Plus, I like my status quo, so I just keep it up. If you aren't happy with the way things are, make changes. But if you like how things are going, just keep doing what you're doing! It's also nice to have other goals beyond weight loss (as others have mentioned.) I've always got some sort of fitness or health goal I'm working on. I guess if I didn't I might lose track - not sure...

ugofatcat

I am sorry, I am not trying to be mean, but unless you do some serious soul searching I am worried you are going to give up.

gabbyo23 wrote: »

So I have lost 1 stone 6lb so far but still have another 3 stone to lose. I'm at that point where I can see a small difference in my appearance but others haven't noticed yet.

I know the only way to do this is slowly. But I find myself thinking "God this is taking forever..." and feeling like giving up.

Just out of curiosity, how long did it take to gain the weight?

What will happen if you give up?

ugofatcat

I saw this quote from Sparkpeople:
Losing weight is hard
Maintain weight loss if hard
Being overweight is hard
Choose your hard.

Counting calories, exercise, having small portions of favorite treats instead of eating until you feel physically ill, making healthy well balanced portion controlled meals at home, this is forever. Or for as long you want to be healthy and a good weight. Do or do not, there is no try.

whatevany

It took me 6 years to lose this weight. What keeps me motivated is never getting back to where I started. You can do this!