Weightloss and Co-Workers

winteravenue

kschwab0203 wrote: »

It seems it it someone's birthday in my office at least once a week...so that means cake.

Right?? Oh my god why Why must they celebrate and bring goodies Q_Q I don't want them up in my face!! I'm a hoarder and I can't help myself. It's hard because I'm an active secretary and I see them multiple times walking by. And each time I steal something. The hoarding must end! Ugh.

Lounmoun

kksmom1789 wrote: »

Thank you again! my co worker and I have also said sometimes it does feel like she is trying to sabotage this whole weight loss thing i'm trying to do. this just happened a minute ago she ordered that frozen cookie dough from a fundraiser for another co worker in another department and she gave me half of the cookie dough and was like I know how much you like cookie dough I did take it and said my kids would love the cookies tonight during our family movie. she is really active a 4 time black belt and teaches a karate school with her husband 2x a week

You need to stop accepting food from her. Every time you accept you send a message that it is really okay to keep doing this even if you decline at first. If it is a problem for you to have these foods then you need to be very clear about no more food and say no every single time. It doesn't matter how fit she is or if you like cookie dough. If you say no that needs to be respected the first time.

tlflag1620

Lounmoun wrote: »

kksmom1789 wrote: »

Thank you again! my co worker and I have also said sometimes it does feel like she is trying to sabotage this whole weight loss thing i'm trying to do. this just happened a minute ago she ordered that frozen cookie dough from a fundraiser for another co worker in another department and she gave me half of the cookie dough and was like I know how much you like cookie dough I did take it and said my kids would love the cookies tonight during our family movie. she is really active a 4 time black belt and teaches a karate school with her husband 2x a week

You need to stop accepting food from her. Every time you accept you send a message that it is really okay to keep doing this even if you decline at first. If it is a problem for you to have these foods then you need to be very clear about no more food and say no every single time. It doesn't matter how fit she is or if you like cookie dough. If you say no that needs to be respected the first time.

Exactly! It's like a toddler asking for a treat at the check out counter. If you say no and then they pitch a fit and you give in, guess what? They're going to try that much harder next time because they have learned that "no" just means "push harder". OP - you need to be firm. Polite, but firm. Keep saying no thanks until she backs off. Get up and leave the room if need be. But don't give in after saying no and then wonder why she pushes harder the next time you say no. History has taught her than she just has to keep asking and eventually you'll cave.

kksmom1789

I will definitely try harder on letting her know about my goals our office only consists of 5 people and we are all very close and tight it's really more like a family so she definitely knows about my goals and restrictions she just thinks I'm too hard on myself
I accepted the cookie dough because my kids would love cookies I'm not going to restrict them and I did eat 3 but I logged them in so don't worry
Thank you for the advice I will definitely keep letting her know to the point where I'm annoying

Packerjohn

kksmom1789 wrote: »

I will definitely try harder on letting her know about my goals our office only consists of 5 people and we are all very close and tight it's really more like a family so she definitely knows about my goals and restrictions she just thinks I'm too hard on myself
I accepted the cookie dough because my kids would love cookies I'm not going to restrict them and I did eat 3 but I logged them in so don't worry
Thank you for the advice I will definitely keep letting her know to the point where I'm annoying

You are setting your self up for failure. Tell them.


Best of luck

kommodevaran

You won't lose the pounds until you lose the victim mentality.

If she insists after you've politely said no thanks, she is being rude.

If the physically puts it into your hands or on yor desk, throw it in the trash at once. Yes, while she can see it.

elisa123gal

I read a post from a man who sat his family down and told them that he wanted support during his weight loss efforts and to please not try to tempt him with food and going off his plan.

I've responded to many posts like yours..saying to throw the food away..

But.. being direct..up front.. they have no choice but to respect your direct and sincere request.

pomegranatecloud

Say no and stop accepting the food. This may be harsh but take some personal responsibility. No one is forcing food down your throat. You're choosing to eat the food instead of declining.

spiriteagle99

One thought I had is that you aren't consistent in saying no. If you say no but then say yes, she doesn't have any reason to believe you mean it. So be consistent, no means no.

rosnz

I think I'm just more sneaky and maybe less guilty about wasting food. I'll sometimes accept a little sliver of cake at work birthday morning tea and say I'll have it later then simply throw it away. I even gone as far as to comment afterwards how tasty it was! If this colleague kept forcing food on me and wouldn't take no thank you for an answer I would have no worries about binning it. One of the things I decided in my weight loss journey was not to eat anything I did not want to and not to eat anything that wasn't absolutely tasty as it could be

kommodevaran

This may actually be a bit interesting, and not at all just about you and your "willpower". Or boring, so I wasn't sure if I should mention it. But anyway, this is another take on the situation...

Your coworker is bringing you gifts. Gifts is about acceptance. She wants to be liked. She knows that you like cookie dough and pizza. That's a no-brainer, because she can see that you take it and eat it (and even gain weight, that's how much you like it - to her). She knows that pizza and cookie dough is delicious, but she can't eat very much of it herself. She wants cookie dough and pizza to be enjoyed. She likes to make you happy. Buying cookie dough is easy. So she gives it to you. You refuse initially, but then accept, and you probably smile and look a bit sheepish? This means to her that you need her permission to eat it, and that it's her job to convince you that you are allowed to eat it.

If you have ever fed a small child or an animal, or heck, been a hostess, you will know the feeling. You want the guests to eat. You feel proud when they eat well and praise your cooking. They accept you as they accept the food. This is also why it's so difficult to throw away an ugly gift from a close relative.

The thing is that you have to take care of your own needs. You are ignoring your own needs and destroying your health trying to be polite, or kind, or maybe, just wanting to avoid conflict. Maybe you can ask her for other gifts instead? Would she walk with you during lunch break? Could you share a meal (normal lunch food) together?