Are you a Diet Drag?

JaydedMiss

I thought of a time i was a diet drag. My ex boyfriend cooked for me (He didnt warn me i hadnt planned for it)

Now hes a very large man who makes terrible (TERRIBLE) diet choices. I had to literally take the green beans to the sink and rinse them off because they were swimming in butter, It literally soaked my entire plate when he scooped them onto the plate. And salt. I could visually see the salt which is impressive since the butter xD

People generally dont take well to you taking their yummy meal and washing it off. It wasnt even so much that i was worried about calories i guess it was just truely gross.

CattOfTheGarage

Washing it is pretty extreme! I would just eat them one by one with a fork, and most of the butter would run off and stay on the plate. Or just eat one or two and leave the rest.

JaydedMiss

The salt was horrid. Was either i sneaked off and tried to rinse it or hed see my face literally drip in tears.

lorrpb

I can understand why she doesn't want to smell ballpark food. You need to learn to have fun regardless of her preferences. Just sayin.

CattOfTheGarage

Too much salt is nasty @jaydedmiss, I feel your pain. And I like salt.

PuppetPrincess

Yeah... the whole, "you can't do that around me because I am on a diet" thing is bogus and annoying. You choose what you eat while I choose what I eat. Having food restrictions means I just have to figure out what on the menu I can eat, not that I get to dictate where we eat every time. If you really cannot be around certain foods because you can't control yourself then you need new friends who eat the same as you. Even the alcoholics I know don't DEMAND that no one drinks around them ever.

leanjogreen18

I actually feel sorry for your friend. She thinks this is how she needs to eat to lose weight and MAYBE she does need to eat this way for now.

If she is your friend maybe a little sympathy and find some work around? idk

walkdmc

I was definitely a diet drag for a while. I LOVED my diet and talked about it like it was my newborn or I was selling the stuff. It was also a very restrictive diet so I drastically changed my social behaviors. Looking back, man was I annoying! However, I did what I needed to do to reverse decades of unhealthy living. I probably annoyed a few people along the way but the end result is better health, a body I'm happier with and friends who stuck out my annoying "diet phase".

Now, im a great sounding board for others' diet struggles. I've been on the other side so I'm really sympathetic and offer (I think) good tips.

OP, just do your thing. Don't worry about having to sit with your friend instead of partying. She'd probably be upset to learn you're not having fun on her account. She'll either find a way to manage those fun activities or she'll change her behaviors but either way, it's her journey, not yours.

kschwab0203

I think my BF thinks I might be a diet drag. He always wants to go out to dinner or to a bar. I will go once a week but if it were up to him it would be several nights a week. Which is the reason I gained this weight in the first place.

amusedmonkey

What's nice is that after a while people get used to the fact that you are losing weight and stop walking on eggshells around you when there is food involved. My sister travels abroad a lot of work, and she always brings me edible goodies. When I first started losing weight she was very reluctant and almost apologetic when she pulled out a small box of chocolate truffles. This is no longer the case. She brought me so much chocolate this time that I'm stocked for months. My mom no longer hesitates to serve baked goods and my friends no longer feel like they need to pick a restaurant that might have a low calorie salad or something instead of what they really want. They all treat me like nothing's changed, which I love.

tomteboda

Honestly, this is how people react to my peanut allergy. So I actively avoid all social situations with food.

fitoverfortymom

Is it possible that maybe she has some disordered eating problems? Sometimes it's a cry for help to constantly bring up a restrictive diet so someone might have spidey senses that something is wrong. Maybe she needs help? It's definitely NOT normal.

JaydedMiss

amusedmonkey wrote: »

What's nice is that after a while people get used to the fact that you are losing weight and stop walking on eggshells around you when there is food involved. My sister travels abroad a lot of work, and she always brings me edible goodies. When I first started losing weight she was very reluctant and almost apologetic when she pulled out a small box of chocolate truffles. This is no longer the case. She brought me so much chocolate this time that I'm stocked for months. My mom no longer hesitates to serve baked goods and my friends no longer feel like they need to pick a restaurant that might have a low calorie salad or something instead of what they really want. They all treat me like nothing's changed, which I love.

I wish people around me were supportive like that.

Although, They purposly keep bringing me to fast food places and force food on me. Which im super cool with because they think i have an eating disorder from losing weight (none of them can) but I eat tons, So im cool with their force feeding XD Although its started making me sick every few times im just not used to overly processed...

jessiferrrb

i think the first few months i talked about it more than now, i would look up things at a restaurant (only if it was a super casual situation) and try to figure out which options fit my goals for the day. it was new, too, so it was what was going on with me, and i was learning a lot and i wanted to share that. i had to amend my social strategies and thought sometimes that i had to explain myself as i did so. i did kind of the same when i first started lifting and i was so so so excited and i wanted to share that whole new world with everyone. now that i'm settled into the everything it's not so new and doesn't need any mentioning. i'll answer if asked but i try not to bring it up.

i never asked that anyone accommodate me though, other than if i'm cooking at home with friends i may ask if they mind if i weigh an ingredient before adding it.

zyxst

Why are you letting your diet friend control the situation?

hookilau

DanniB423 wrote: »

I find people tend to make me a drag by talking about it even when I don't. Saturday I was at lunch with my husband's family. They ordered onion rings and fried pickles as appetizers. As soon as they order his aunt declares "oh man! That was so rude of us to do to Danni! She is doing so well. Sorry Danni!" Also followed by "what are you ordering Danni? Salad? I should too... but I have no willpower!" I actually had 5 fried pickles chips,grilled chicken sandwich with cheese/bacon and a side of fruit. Because I can live my life and fit it in my goals for the day. People are amazed by that. I don't have to say a word for people to bring up what a drag my life is. Lol.
Edit: typo

oh boy...THIS =P
I can totally sympathize!!

hookilau

TR0berts wrote: »

cityruss wrote: »

Friend : "I need my fish and water pronto".

Me : "OK, I'm eating later where i'll be drinking cocktails and wine".

---

Friend : "I'm not leaving my seat, I might smell food"

Me : "Ok, see you after halftime"

Word.

And whenever I get particularly strict - such as I'm cutting for a competition - I always tell my wife (and whomever is with us) to get whatever she/they want(s). I'm a big boy and can make my own choices on how/what to restrict my intake. I can still hang, but eat either less or something different.

Excellent response
I'm going to have to remember that when getting together with my family again next!

VeganRaptor

Is your friend okay? That's a long time to be in such a big calorie deficit, especially with those extra restrictions and being so obsessive about food.

I'd personally be worried about her mental health and talk to her about it.

LAWoman72

No. God no. I never talk about my "diet" to anybody, except for my husband, who incessantly goes on about dieting and food (he's lost 100 lbs.). Other than him, I don't mention food or eating to anybody, really. I don't point out what I can or can't eat at gatherings, I don't make a peep. Why talk about it? I eat what I want and feel I should eat and leave the rest and otherwise I mingle and talk and, well, party. Because that's what a party is for.

I can make do practically anywhere with some sort of food or other so there's never any need to mention the food itself, and I definitely never, ever bring up my weight loss or working out. Other people will point it out to me and ask how I did it and I give a simple "diet and exercise" and then I drop the entire thing.

elisa123gal

Thanks to all of you for allowing me to vent and for your understanding and tips. I have to say, it solidifies my strategy of keeping my fitness routine to myself.. I'd rather do an extra 15 at the gym..and eat a bit more lean..so i can enjoy a weekend night with friends without standing out. I love my friend.. think I'll just ignore her behavior and no longer pander to the food issues. again.thanks.

elisa123gal

lorrpb wrote: »

I can understand why she doesn't want to smell ballpark food. You need to learn to have fun regardless of her preferences. Just sayin.

it wasn't that.. i was looking forward to talking and socializing with her and her boyfriend as we always do. It was more that ..not at all the food. If I could take or leave her company.. i would have never written the post. Do you get that? It is more that her diet has changed her fun spirit.

Machka9

grmckenzie wrote: »

Machka9 wrote: »

I don't like talking about my diet either. I get asked now and then but usually opt to answer the question as briefly as possible and then redirect.

Is it wrong to just answer "Aids"?

In my office ... that would NOT go down well.

It was bad enough when I got a rash that looked like measles ... all the testing, public health involved, etc. etc. etc. ...