Gaining great muscle and fighting body dysmorphia - women
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Awe @Sumiblue, fair enough my back is no where near yours (drool), but my party dresses this year are backless and I have had a couple of occasions where women, nicely built complete strangers, have come up to me and said 'I love your back, do you lift.?'
Put a little pink glow on my cheeks and made for some interesting conversations.
Show off your accomplishments with pride.
Cheers, h.
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I think we are all entitled to strive for what physique we desire without being made to feel bad.
yup. it doesn't have to be all that fixed either; you can like one look and go for it and then decide you're interested in something else. that's one of the fun things about lifting for me. i've never coloured my hair or had it permed in my life, but i have some of that 'right now i'm into' attitude towards the whole muscle-group thing. it's fun to think that i can pick the things i like most and put in the effort to get at least some of the way towards looking like that.
and personally, i just do it for the me-fun of it. i'm just too old to care what kind of look is in fashion right now. i think serious six-packs look like the crab i had to dissect in high school, and i don't give a damn if somebody else thinks we 'should' have x or y body part in a or b form. i never felt like i 'had' to be blonde just because i saw someone with gorgeous blonde hair, so it's the same kind of thing. i just happily pursue my own little things and if i'm the only person in the world who thinks my baby traps are adorable, that's fine by me.2 -
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I cannot trust the mirror.
This!
My youngest daughter and I commiserate a lot over this subject. She is 26, beautiful and just slightly overweight with a lot of muscle (strong as an ox) underneath a few lbs of fat. She HATES her body, but she's very open to talking to me about it. I've suggested to her on numerous occasions to avoid listening to what her eyes/brain are telling her about herself in front of that damn mirror and trust what others say about how she looks.
Me? I've lost all I wanted to with the exception of a couple of lbs, have a decent amount of well defined muscle, slimmed out face and get a lot of compliments. I still intensely dislike what I see in the mirror. Go figure. My waist looks fat and ill defined, shoulders look skinny lol.
I'm trying to follow my own advice to her lol....it only works part time lol.0 -
middlehaitch wrote: »Awe @Sumiblue, fair enough my back is no where near yours (drool), but my party dresses this year are backless and I have had a couple of occasions where women, nicely built complete strangers, have come up to me and said 'I love your back, do you lift.?'
Put a little pink glow on my cheeks and made for some interesting conversations.
Show off your accomplishments with pride.
Cheers, h.
You look amazing in backless party dresses! Maybe I should get one...
Speaking for myself, I sometimes have issues with change. Getting a new, extreme haircut, getting a tattoo, etc. Even though I go into these things willingly, the sudden change to my appearance can be jarring.
I don't check out my back very often and one day I did. I'd been lifting 4x a week for at least a year at that point. Lifting 3x a week for another year, previously. I could not believe how muscular my back looked. For the most part, I love it and am proud of what I've achieved. People remark on how fit I am. I'm strong, smaller than I've been in decades and can run around the yard doing handstands with my 5 yr old.
But, I've had to let go of some of my girliest sundresses this Summer. They just look ridiculous on me, now. I look for sportier garments and rock those
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So I had a friend take a picture of my back yesterday...OMG...I'm such an idiot. My back looks amazing in the photo!!!! WTF is wrong with me!!!8
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Your avatar photo? Absolutely looks great. That "muscular, manly, bulky" look you don't want is a long ways off.3
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Just when I thought I was getting "too big," I had 3 random ladies come up to me at the gym (separately) and tell me that my shoulders looked "amazing."
You're likely your own worst critic. Lift on.1 -
So I had a friend take a picture of my back yesterday...OMG...I'm such an idiot. My back looks amazing in the photo!!!! WTF is wrong with me!!!
Ooh I love backs that looks like yours, congrats. h (I aspire)
Ahh @Sumiblue I am envious. I am trying to do handstands and cartwheels again, after a 50 year break, so I can do them with my 6yo grandson. I find them so much more intimidating now.
Cheers, h.2 -
No worries about you looking manly, OP.
As you can see, I have a lot of muscle in my back. But, I have that azz, so I don't worry about looking "manly". Fit? Yes.
If you look at my profile pic, I still look just fine in a dress.4 -
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