When life plays, how do you handle it.

navdeeprana
navdeeprana Posts: 473 Member
edited November 14 in Chit-Chat
Since this is literally the ONLY social forum I come on, looking forward to hearing from folks out here.

I used to think that life is a bed or roses lol, and there are only good times, until recently I was reminded everything here is temporary, there will be good and for sure there would be not so good and worst times.

Looking forward for knowing how folks out here handle tough situations of life , when you are hammered by one bad thing after another one and so on.....as if it seems never ending cycle of bad times.

NO JUDGEMENTS

Stay Strong !!
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Replies

  • Eash84
    Eash84 Posts: 68 Member
    edited December 2016
    Unfortunately I nap....a lot.. Gotta get a better handle on lifes stresses.
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    I take some advice I was given:

    1. There is a season for everything. Winter doesn't last forever. This too shall pass.

    2. Focus on today.

    3. Don't make permanent decisions based on temporary problems (works well with advice #1).

    Also, some stuff I found that helps:

    1. Prayer

    2. Long form of the Serenity prayer (the second paragraph is key)

    3. A book called How to Be Happy No Matter What: Five Principles Your Therapist Never Told You by Richard Carlson, PhD
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    To be serious for a moment ( a brief moment )....

    It's taken me a while to fully understand that I can only control my reaction to any given situation.

    The situation is given, my reaction is not.

    Also, the outcome as a result of my actions (or inaction) is also beyond my control.

    not stressing over what one cannot control is key.

    Good advice.

    P.S. I don't think I've ever seen you serious.
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    Eash84 wrote: »
    Unfortunately I nap....a lot.. Gotta get a better handle on lifes stresses.

    Stress sleeping - I read about that. At least you're not up and over eating....
  • KyleGrace8
    KyleGrace8 Posts: 2,205 Member
    edited December 2016
    I sleep and hide away in my house. Sometimes I do elaborate makeup and pretend I'm pretty. tbh I don't handle any issues, I just avoid them. Hmmmmm hug your pet way longer than they want.

    Now stuff that would probably actually help: excersise, keep yourself busy, write a list of the good in your life, listen to happy upbeat music.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    To be serious for a moment ( a brief moment )....

    It's taken me a while to fully understand that I can only control my reaction to any given situation.

    The situation is given, my reaction is not.

    Also, the outcome as a result of my actions (or inaction) is also beyond my control.

    not stressing over what one cannot control is key.


    P.S. I don't think I've ever seen you serious.

    yeah... I'm not going there again anytime soon; it's scary.
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
    Besides drink.....

    I remind myself that I am still breathing...and to put one foot in front of the other until I come out on the other side. This is something I have had to practice for the last 6 months
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    KyleGrace8 wrote: »
    I sleep and hide away in my house. Sometimes I do elaborate makeup and pretend I'm pretty. tbh I don't handle any issues, I just avoid them. Hmmmmm hug you pet way longer than they want.

    Now stuff that would probably actually help: excersise, keep yourself busy, write a list of the good in your life, listen to happy upbeat music.



    All of this.

    Writing out gratitude lists are really helpful,

    Staying busy keeps your mind off stuff

    Excercise gets endorphins going

    Uplifting music uplifts your soul

  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    I call my wife.

    I call my mom.

    I call my brother.

    I go to church.

    I go get myself panneer tikka, chicken kabobs and goat briyani.

    I buy a new suit.

    I lift weights.

    I go teach in Harlem or Queens.

    I come home and my wife and I spend time together.

    Short: I rely on my family, the divine and take care of myself.

    Great advice.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    In the past I have suffered from terrible bouts of anxiety trying to control things that I can in no way shape or form control. Through the years and some counseling, etc I've learned to let go and basically roll with the punches. When bad stuff happens, I know that it will ultimately pass even though it may feel like it won't.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    edited December 2016
    I used to worry something to death. I do not any more. In short, I cannot control anything that happens to me other than my body mind and soul.

    Everything else needs a formulated direct plan of action that takes a rational mind..

    I have lost a child, so nothing can compare to anything than other than dealing with that, everything else is secondary to disease and death..

    I use exercise, quiet time, me time, and fun time to destress when needed. I have found that living life a little simpler is much easier on the mind. And having an open mind at all times opens windows of opportunity.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,985 Member
    There are things you are in control of and some you aren't. It's the one's that people aren't that they worry about.
    You handle the problem when it comes up or find ways to not let it become a problem in the first place.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png
  • thisonetimeatthegym
    thisonetimeatthegym Posts: 1,977 Member
    RoxieDawn wrote: »
    I used to worry something to death. I do not any more. In short, I cannot control anything that happens to me other than my body mind and soul.

    Everything else needs a formulated direct plan of action that takes a rational mind..

    I have lost a child, so nothing can compare to anything than other than dealing with that, everything else is secondary to disease and death..

    I use exercise, quiet time, me time, and fun time to destress when needed. I have found that living life a little simpler is much easier on the mind. And having an open mind at all times opens windows of opportunity.

    Roxie!

    Hugs. Wishing you abundant levels of peace and love.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    edited December 2016
    RoxieDawn wrote: »
    I used to worry something to death. I do not any more. In short, I cannot control anything that happens to me other than my body mind and soul.

    Everything else needs a formulated direct plan of action that takes a rational mind..

    I have lost a child, so nothing can compare to anything than other than dealing with that, everything else is secondary to disease and death..

    I use exercise, quiet time, me time, and fun time to destress when needed. I have found that living life a little simpler is much easier on the mind. And having an open mind at all times opens windows of opportunity.

    Roxie!

    Hugs. Wishing you abundant levels of peace and love.

    Thank you so much!!!! and the same to you!!!!
  • BoosDimples
    BoosDimples Posts: 2,826 Member
    I just keep going. Not a fan of the alternative .
  • rugratz2015
    rugratz2015 Posts: 593 Member
    Don't sweat the small stuff, there are enough real problems without nit picking. I pick my battles, the rest I just gloss over and carry on. I have my children and hubby, they are the only really important people in my life and I know everything will work out the way it's meant to.
    Reading 'The Secret' and various positive thinking quotes have helped me.
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
    Chocolate. I have chocolate
  • Shana67
    Shana67 Posts: 680 Member
    I have gone through a LOT this year - even this week. My older daughter went into the hospital on Christmas Eve and came home Wednesday, then Dr appointments since then. The stress has been unbelievable - more than I have ever experienced. How I cope:

    Lots of prayer. Seriously. I need some time daily for quiet to focus and talk with God about how I'm feeling, what's going on, to ask Him for help or patience or a million other things. And to listen.

    Good friends. I have a group of 5 girlfriends that I can talk to about anything, and who listen and give great advice. The best part is that they do NOT always tell me what I want to hear - they tell me what I NEED to hear. And I always come away from a conversation with any of them, feeling more peaceful.

    EXERCISE. Endorphins. Enough said.

    A great, great husband and good sex :D
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    I am bad luck in a bottle, covering up with a smile

    Honestly, that is my coping skill...been through a lil of everything from foster care, homelessness, physical and sexual abuse, death of mom when I was 10, dad at 14, evictions, etc... I figure I have taken enough for the team lol... But seriously, just keep moving forward one day at a time... And keep any support you have as close to your heart as you can.

    Re5pext

    Mad Re5pext
  • mjhuisheere
    mjhuisheere Posts: 60 Member
    Can I pick up one of those at the store lol?
  • nickkd
    nickkd Posts: 6 Member
    I think I just man up and get on with it.
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
    I am bad luck in a bottle, covering up with a smile

    Honestly, that is my coping skill...been through a lil of everything from foster care, homelessness, physical and sexual abuse, death of mom when I was 10, dad at 14, evictions, etc... I figure I have taken enough for the team lol... But seriously, just keep moving forward one day at a time... And keep any support you have as close to your heart as you can.

    Bada$$

    You're officially the toughest one of us all. And hey, good karma doesn't necessarily come first. Sometimes it comes after all the *kitten* we've been through
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
    edited December 2016
    Get enough "me" time

    exercise

    go to church regularly and pray

    get quality time with your SO

    Don't stress or comfort eat, it only makes you feel worse

  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    When everything goes wrong and I feel like screaming "Why me??!!!" I think of all the Blessings in my life and how life could be so much worse and about the even more serious problems and tragedies that people face every single day!

    I have experienced tragedies and trauma in my life but have Survived those and I'm still here to wake up every morning to a new day! Being alive...That my friends is the greatest gift! :smile:
  • Eash84
    Eash84 Posts: 68 Member
    edited December 2016
    Eash84 wrote: »
    Unfortunately I nap....a lot.. Gotta get a better handle on lifes stresses.

    Stress sleeping - I read about that. At least you're not up and over eating....

    True....guess it could be worse..

This discussion has been closed.