Best ways to meet people

sw33tp3a1

jjewell1981 wrote: »

sw33tp3a1 wrote: »

I have no social life. My shyness and awkwardness keep me away from having RL "friends". Most of my friend are in my pocket... sad I know lol but to be fair, most RL people suck. My imaginary friends are awesome!

But I'm real!

Prove it

Cameron_1969

So i'm not the only one!?.. I blame my situation for my dearth of close friends. . That way, I don't have to get all depressed!. . My problem is that after 20 years of interacting with friends exclusively with the assistance of beer, I quit drinking and moved to another town. . So how exactly does a dude make friends with other dudes without beer?. I simply do not have a clue how this is done. .

pinuplove

jenilla1 wrote: »

I don't meet people on my own. I get introduced. I'm an introvert, and not very approachable I guess. And I'm not the type to make the first move. I'm not ugly, so I think I must appear intimidating in some way. I can count the number of times someone has "hit on" me in my lifetime on one hand.

Before my husband and I met, his best friend and my best friend got married. My future husband was stationed abroad at the time, so he wasn't at the wedding. They kept telling me how perfect this guy was for me, so I was intrigued. A year or so later when he was back in town, they finally introduced the two of us. And it was an instant and perfect match. That's how I met my husband.

In terms of friends, same thing. I'm friendly, but in such a casual, standoffish way that I'm just not good at making friends. I haven't made any new friends in well over a decade. Haven't really felt the need. I wonder what it would even be like to try. I have several acquaintances, but I have very few friends - like two, and one of those is my sister. It's a lot of work to maintain fulfilling, meaningful, worthwhile relationships with people. I don't want to halfass a dozen shallow friendships just so I can say I have a ton of friends. So I just have a few key people that I spend my energy and effort on. Everybody else just kind of fades away over the years as other priorities come up.

Being a quality friend is a lot of work for an introvert like me. It can suck the energy right out of you. I've always been like that for as long as I can remember. Good thing I've got my husband. He's like the opposite of most other social relationships - instead of draining the life out of me, he re-energizes me.

From the sound of many of the other posts in this thread, we are not alone in our friendlessness...

You've summed up introversion very well! As an introvert, I don't have the mental energy to devote to maintaining more than a couple of close relationships. I think the definition of 'friend' also varies between intro- and ambi- or extroverts.

DeficitDuchess

I was, a situational introvert as; a child but was an extrovert when, the scene wasn't overly; noisy/crowded & I wasn't the, center of; attention! Parties were just too much for, me especially when it; was my own! I couldn't deal with having to, decide whose present to open 1st & when to open any of them, whom to give the slice of cake to 1st or when to've the cake and/or being the most popular 1 that, had to choose which activity I chose to; do with each child or in what order & whom I was going to sit next to! I begged, to've a; birthday party but then, hid & cried from, the pressure during; it!

As an adult my personality's that of an extrovert, I'd gladly host any; party currently &'ve even facilitated crafts at, my; apartment complex's community room but my disability otherwise, renders me an; introvert because of exhaustion & a lack of activities being within, a reasonable travel distance by; bus!

TheRoadDog

I met my wife 28 years ago. I was working in a Chiropractic Office as a Licensed Massage Therapist. She was referred to me after an Auto Accident. After two years we finally went out for a cocktail. I asked her to marry me on the second date. 25th Wedding Anniversary is this Summer. I guess I didn't rub her the wrong way.

Motorsheen

TheRoadDog wrote: »

I met my wife 28 years ago. I was working in a Chiropractic Office as a Licensed Massage Therapist. She was referred to me after an Auto Accident. After two years we finally went out for a cocktail. I asked her to marry me on the second date. 25th Wedding Anniversary is this Summer. I guess I didn't rub her the wrong way.

Tip your waitress!

deputy_randolph

I meet people at the gym...I'm a regular and have regular friends now. I volunteer at a cat shelter and have met people through there...mostly cat ladies (not very regular people).

I met my husband in a chat room in 1998. So there's that.

lilawolf

My best friends are people that I work with (long trips to China for work and play will bond people) and people that I've met through them. Other friends are from when I was younger and THEIR friends, people that I've met through Krav Maga, even one person that I met in RL after being friends on MFP! I'm trying to use Tinder, but trust issues make that hard...

Unfortunately, its a bit like needing to have money to make money. A LOT easier to meet new people and make new friends if you already have some and can meet people through them..