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Losing Weight as a stay at home parent or a working parent?
panda4153
Posts: 417 Member
in Debate Club
Hi Everyone,
I am putting this in the debate section, because I think it could turn out to be kind of a hot button issue. Do you think its harder to lose weight and maintain a healthy life style as a stay at home parent or a working parent?
I ask because I saw a thread asking for advice from SAHMs on how they do it. I work, I have 3 kids, I commute and I do most of the household chores, shopping etc. I answered that it wasn't about stay at home or not, it was about making fitness and eating habits a priority or not. I personally think that all of us have life circumstances that can make it challenging to get in the workout that day, or harder to eat like we know we should and maintain a calorie deficit if your goal is lose. The OP responded that she was specifically seeking tips from SAHMs and then proceeded to list a bunch of reasons why its hard for her. My point though is that its hard for everyone! Regardless of circumstances you either are going to make it happen or you are not, it all comes down to choices and priorities.
I would love to know what everyone else thinks.
I am putting this in the debate section, because I think it could turn out to be kind of a hot button issue. Do you think its harder to lose weight and maintain a healthy life style as a stay at home parent or a working parent?
I ask because I saw a thread asking for advice from SAHMs on how they do it. I work, I have 3 kids, I commute and I do most of the household chores, shopping etc. I answered that it wasn't about stay at home or not, it was about making fitness and eating habits a priority or not. I personally think that all of us have life circumstances that can make it challenging to get in the workout that day, or harder to eat like we know we should and maintain a calorie deficit if your goal is lose. The OP responded that she was specifically seeking tips from SAHMs and then proceeded to list a bunch of reasons why its hard for her. My point though is that its hard for everyone! Regardless of circumstances you either are going to make it happen or you are not, it all comes down to choices and priorities.
I would love to know what everyone else thinks.
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Replies
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I have done both, working and SAH. I find it harder when I at SAH because the temptation is there and I am weak.
When I work, I bring my food and I can't really cheat. Plus, when I'm busy a work I have less time to think about food.3 -
Hard is relative. You can't judge someone's circumstances because things are easier for you. Also, this is not going to end well.6
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »Hard is relative. You can't judge someone's circumstances because things are easier for you. Also, this is not going to end well.
I agree with you, I try not judge anyone else's circumstances as I know that for various reasons things can be harder for one individual then another. What is easy for one can be challenging for another, and vice versa. I guess though that I had never thought working in the home or out of the home made a difference in weight loss and fitness, as both circumstances can make it difficult to stick to your goals at times. I also know this is a hot topic which is why I posted it to his board.2 -
hopetobelean wrote: »I have done both, working and SAH. I find it harder when I at SAH because the temptation is there and I am weak.
When I work, I bring my food and I can't really cheat. Plus, when I'm busy a work I have less time to think about food.
Haha that's funny, I found the opposite true for me. When I have been at home, I can control the food that is in my house and avoid temptation that way. When I work I find it hard to avoid the temptation of eating out all the time. Don't get me wrong I think you can eat out and fit it into your calories, but its way more taxing on my willpower then eating at home.1 -
I might get hate because I'm not a mom and I'm single.
However, I think if we all gave it some thought we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do. I work in extremely stressful job and I work for 10 hour days with an average of 6 to 8 hours of overtime a week. On my three days off I also have to clean my whole apartment, do all my grocery shopping, run all my errands, and I volunteer with a running club for young girls on my days off you encourage positive body image and self-esteem. I also try to have a social life!
But I do make time to go to the gym five days a week and I prep my meals on my last day off so I have a healthy meal on my workdays. If you want to have a healthy active lifestyle you can, but you have to want it. If you don't want it bad enough, you're going to make excuses as to why you can't get it. But I think as busy as everyone is they can probably find an hour in their schedule A couple times a week to spend time on fitness. No one is that busy. But again, it has to be something you want and prioritize.
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I might get hate because I'm not a mom and I'm single.
However, I think if we all gave it some thought we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do. I work in extremely stressful job and I work for 10 hour days with an average of 6 to 8 hours of overtime a week. On my three days off I also have to clean my whole apartment, do all my grocery shopping, run all my errands, and I volunteer with a running club for young girls on my days off you encourage positive body image and self-esteem. I also try to have a social life!
But I do make time to go to the gym five days a week and I prep my meals on my last day off so I have a healthy meal on my workdays. If you want to have a healthy active lifestyle you can, but you have to want it. If you don't want it bad enough, you're going to make excuses as to why you can't get it. But I think as busy as everyone is they can probably find an hour in their schedule A couple times a week to spend time on fitness. No one is that busy. But again, it has to be something you want and prioritize.
Come back when you have a baby. Please.8 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »I might get hate because I'm not a mom and I'm single.
However, I think if we all gave it some thought we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do. I work in extremely stressful job and I work for 10 hour days with an average of 6 to 8 hours of overtime a week. On my three days off I also have to clean my whole apartment, do all my grocery shopping, run all my errands, and I volunteer with a running club for young girls on my days off you encourage positive body image and self-esteem. I also try to have a social life!
But I do make time to go to the gym five days a week and I prep my meals on my last day off so I have a healthy meal on my workdays. If you want to have a healthy active lifestyle you can, but you have to want it. If you don't want it bad enough, you're going to make excuses as to why you can't get it. But I think as busy as everyone is they can probably find an hour in their schedule A couple times a week to spend time on fitness. No one is that busy. But again, it has to be something you want and prioritize.
Come back when you have a baby. Please.
I expected that, but in my defense I think just because I don't have kids doesn't mean I don't have a busy life. My life is actually busier than the average person. And from an outside perspective, which is skewed I'll admit, it seems like parents use their kids a lot as an excuse when there are plenty of healthy and fit single parents and married parents.
But if you want to focus on that and ignore everything else I said that's cool too!14 -
I am single mom. I work as a social media manager from home. I always say at home mom life, working mom paycheck. My son has a extremely active dance and theatre life which I too do also. I also am a facepainter on the weekends. I think we 're all on our own journeys. I'd rather cheer someone on than make comparisons. Let's face it some days are better than others no matter who we are.12
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I think it's equally challenging for either stay-at-home-moms or working moms. I've been both. Different challenges, yes, but equally tough.
Ultimately, though, there are 24 hours in a day for each of us to use as we see fit. You make room in your schedule for the things that matter to you.I might get hate because I'm not a mom and I'm single.
However, I think if we all gave it some thought we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do. I work in extremely stressful job and I work for 10 hour days with an average of 6 to 8 hours of overtime a week. On my three days off I also have to clean my whole apartment, do all my grocery shopping, run all my errands, and I volunteer with a running club for young girls on my days off you encourage positive body image and self-esteem. I also try to have a social life!
But I do make time to go to the gym five days a week and I prep my meals on my last day off so I have a healthy meal on my workdays. If you want to have a healthy active lifestyle you can, but you have to want it. If you don't want it bad enough, you're going to make excuses as to why you can't get it. But I think as busy as everyone is they can probably find an hour in their schedule A couple times a week to spend time on fitness. No one is that busy. But again, it has to be something you want and prioritize.
I couldn't agree more. I have no idea why you were attacked for sharing this sentiment.
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RunningOnWontons wrote: »I think it's equally challenging for either stay-at-home-moms or working moms. I've been both. Different challenges, yes, but equally tough.
Ultimately, though, there are 24 hours in a day for each of us to use as we see fit. You make room in your schedule for the things that matter to you.I might get hate because I'm not a mom and I'm single.
However, I think if we all gave it some thought we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do. I work in extremely stressful job and I work for 10 hour days with an average of 6 to 8 hours of overtime a week. On my three days off I also have to clean my whole apartment, do all my grocery shopping, run all my errands, and I volunteer with a running club for young girls on my days off you encourage positive body image and self-esteem. I also try to have a social life!
But I do make time to go to the gym five days a week and I prep my meals on my last day off so I have a healthy meal on my workdays. If you want to have a healthy active lifestyle you can, but you have to want it. If you don't want it bad enough, you're going to make excuses as to why you can't get it. But I think as busy as everyone is they can probably find an hour in their schedule A couple times a week to spend time on fitness. No one is that busy. But again, it has to be something you want and prioritize.
I couldn't agree more. I have no idea why you were attacked for sharing this sentiment.
Thank you
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And just to add...the busiest person I know is a lady in my neighborhood around my same age. She has six kids and works as a nurse. On her days off, WITHOUT FAIL, she walks around our neighborhood with her two youngest in a double stroller. I have watched her transform herself into an incredibly fit woman by doing this humble routine so determinedly. She inspires me.
I'm not about to say that it's easy for anyone, but it just doesn't take much in the way of excess time or money for any of us, moms or not, SAHM or not, to lose weight and to become fit. Just PLENTY of determination.7 -
...I answered that it wasn't about stay at home or not, it was about making fitness and eating habits a priority or not. I personally think that all of us have life circumstances that can make it challenging to get in the workout that day, or harder to eat like we know we should and maintain a calorie deficit if your goal is lose....Regardless of circumstances you either are going to make it happen or you are not, it all comes down to choices and priorities...
I completely agree. It's not a competition to see who works the hardest or suffers the most. We all have challenges in our lives, and we all have to set our own priorities. You either set, pursue, and achieve your goals or you don't. Good luck to all!2 -
Everyone has challenges. Students, married people, people with kids, single people dating, people with health conditions, working people, poor people, vacationing people, etc. We are not as unique as we think we are. CICO for everyone to manage weight.
I am a SAHM and homeschool my teenager. I think in some ways it is easier for weight loss and others it is harder than if I was working outside the home. I don't really feel it has been that difficult though for me.
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we all have busy lives and circumstances we could use that as an excuse to not do things we don't want to do.
Watch some episodes of "Supersize vs Superskinny" (youtube). You will meet overweight and underweight people of all categories - married women and men, single parents, bachelors, hard working and hardly working, can't cook or love to cook - all of them find their particular life and circumstances a hurdle to eat "enough, but not too much" and move, or not move too much.3 -
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No matter what your "situation" or occupation; a calorie deficit is a calorie deficit and you need self control.3
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theskinnyonme wrote: »I am single mom. I work as a social media manager from home. I always say at home mom life, working mom paycheck. My son has a extremely active dance and theatre life which I too do also. I also am a facepainter on the weekends. I think we 're all on our own journeys. I'd rather cheer someone on than make comparisons. Let's face it some days are better than others no matter who we are.
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I have done both. I was a SAHM for 3 years when my boys were younger and now I am working (they are 8 & 6, plus I have an 18 year old daughter) Both have pros and cons.
As a SAHM I found I could spread it out more, I could spend more time working on foods and prepping my food and every 90 minutes I had a timer on my phone that would remind me to get up and spend 5 minutes doing something more active. I would do things like leg lifts, jump rope, jumping jacks, etc. I also walked my boys all over the place since we only had one car. I would also spend nap time doing a workout video.
Now, I am in an office job but luckily it is really flexible and I have a standing desk. Now I have a reminder for every 45 minutes to either us the standing desk or go walk the floor I am on one time. I really should add stairs to that. I either workout in the early morning (5am- ish) or I use my lunch break for workouts.
As both it comes down to me needing to watch what I eat. And it comes to me prioritizing my health and how I feel.2 -
Weight loss can be challenging for anybody. I see nothing wrong with seeking suggestions from others who have similar circumstances. People in college or who have been in college may have suggestions as to possible resources available to other people in college. SAHMs may have suggestions for groups that other SAHMs can look up. Etc. This thread comes off as "I'm busier than you so you shouldn't ask for advice from your peers."4
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I think it sounds like the opposite, actually -- OP said it can be hard for everyone.
It kind of sounded like the thread OP was reacting to was that, that she was told that it was far, far more difficult as a SAHM than for anyone else, and that no one else could possibly understand the overwhelming difficulties (and of course not everyone has the same SAHM experience, as it's going to differ based on the age of the kids, whether they go to school or other activities, etc.).
Personally, I've always found it easy not to overeat when at home, and harder not to overeat at work, but people are different, and I am not home all day with kids either.2 -
I worked when both my kids were babies and now I stay at home and they are 2 and 4. I find it easier now that I am home to always fit in exercise. I have the option of taking them to the gym with free childcare or working out in my home while they play or even going outside for walks when it is nice out. When I was working, I still managed to fit in but I was waking up at 4:30am before I got them off and ready to go to daycare. This was much harder because it left me exhausted by the end of the day (I was an elementary teacher). My husband doesn't get off work till 7:30-8:00 so I was on all day. By the time I got off work, picked up kids from daycare, it was time to ruh home and make dinner, baths, and laundry. Everything that I have all day to do when I stay at home was compressed into those few hours after work until bedtime.
Now that I am at home and looking to get back to work next year, I give lots of credit to women who work with children and still maintain a solid exercise routine. I can only imagine how much busier I will be once my kids start activities and I think I will have to modify how many days I workout so I don't get exhausted once I return to work. I just find staying at home a little more easier. Yes I am still on all day and plenty busy with cleaning/cooking/entertaining the kids etc. but I also know that I am home everyday so if something doesn't get done immediately I can finish it the next day.4 -
When I was working, I still managed to fit in but I was waking up at 4:30am before I got them off and ready to go to daycare. This was much harder because it left me exhausted by the end of the day (I was an elementary teacher). My husband doesn't get off work till 7:30-8:00 so I was on all day. By the time I got off work, picked up kids from daycare, it was time to ruh home and make dinner, baths, and laundry. Everything that I have all day to do when I stay at home was compressed into those few hours after work until bedtime.
I'm actually a work from home mom and the above is also my struggle. I am not a morning person at all and have attempted to get up at 4:30 for the last several years. I do really well for a month and then fall off for a month or two and then start the cycle over. I've heard it all gets easier when kids get to elementary school age. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
I find being at home more difficult because I'm a stress eater with a stressful-ish job and I work 10 feet from my kitchen
And honestly, I just think children make everything harder. But they are awesome so I'll deal with it
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Everyone has a tough time eating properly and getting workouts in. Everyone has potential excuses they can use to be fat and/or unfit.
But I think parents have more of a duty to be fit than the rest of us. You owe it to your kids to model for them a healthy lifestyle. And you owe it to your kids to try to someday be a healthy, mobile, active old person so that you can enjoy each other when they're adults. Old age health starts today.7 -
I have done both.
As a stay at home mom, I had more time to go to the gym, grocery shop, meal prep, etc. However, just because I had more time didn't mean I had more motivation.3 -
I'm both. I do EVERYTHING in the house and outside, plus take care of all my daughter's stuff like karate, band, and any other activities, plus work part time as PT and during lunch hours at my DD's school.
And honestly, if one organizes their time correctly, it's NOT that hard IMO. I believe that a lot of people don't organize their time correctly and procrastinate a lot on getting things done. That's where they lose the time they don't have.
All this and I STILL have time to take care of myself and workout.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Just curious - is there a thread where people post their daily schedules? Things like that always help me see ways that I could be optimizing my time better.3
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The person who thinks they CAN do something, will be able to accomplish it. The person who thinks they cannot do something, will not accomplish it, or will have difficulty. Positive thinking. Don't say "this is hard" Say, "I can do this!"3
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Disclosure: I am not a mother.
However, I have two sisters who became mothers last year. Their babies were born two months apart. One stays at home, the other works. I notice they have common challenges and they have some unique challenges. I don't think either one of them has an "easier" time. The one who stays at home struggles to find time to work out because she's the only one there for most of the day. You can't leave a baby alone. When her husband gets home, she feels reluctant to take time for herself because she knows her husband wants to unwind from his job. The one who works struggles to find time because she feels guilty for not spending all available time with her son (and her husband works at night, so she's the only one with her son many evenings anyway). That's just one example, I could go on with things like planning meals, avoiding excess calories, etc.
I think it just comes down to losing weight is hard for many people and being a parent can add difficulties. Those difficulties may be felt differently by people in different situations (and it goes beyond staying at home or working, you can get into things like economic status, where you live, mental issues with food, etc). What we can all do is look at the circumstances of our lives, figure out what we truly value, and do our best to make it happen.
I see people, both parents and non-parents, say they don't have time to exercise or plan meals that meet their goals. It's not up to me to judge whether or not that's true, it's their life. But I know many people who value fitness find a way to make it happen no matter what is going on in their lives.6 -
I work full time, commute 30+ minutes each way and am the primary shopper and meal maker at my house. My challenge to lose weight had nothing to do with any of that and everything to do with making my weight loss and health my priority. I think like most mothers, everyone else comes first, always. It's just how many of us are wired. I let that be my excuse for not taking care of myself for years.
Once I finally decided to be my priority, my weight loss journey has been a success and I think I am a better wife and mother because of it.
Being a parent is hard and it makes it easy to forget about taking care of ourselves, whether you work outside the home or not.3 -
I am a single, working mom who works at home half the time and travels for work half the time.
When I'm home with the kids (but also working) I find it easier to find time to work out even though the schedule is crazy busy. For me it's the weeks I am travelling for business with no kids that I find the hardest. I have to eat out with clients every meal and jam pack my days full of meetings then have to spend a couple hours in the evening in my hotel doing follow up emails from all the things I promised throughout the day.
Regardless of what I'm doing the key for me is to find workouts that are shorter and more efficient. That's the only way I can seem to fit them in and make them count.1
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