the alien overlords have arrived
_har_T_Swallow
Posts: 2,606 Member
let's say this happens...
an alien race arrives on earth. their technology is far in advance of our own. any attempt at rebellion or warfare will quickly be put down, with little to no casualties or loss of assets on the side of the alien race.
the aliens can understand us perfectly. sadly, they have deemed humanity to be a destructive and violent force which should be stopped before spreading any further throughout the universe. they are one single day away from initiating the utter destruction of our planet. this isn't a decision they came to lightly.
suddenly- you are teleported to the alien mothership and granted an audience with their collective leader. the alien overlord is receptive to your presence however. the overlord will listen to anything you have to say, and will observe anything you wish him to. the overlord is easily killable, but such an act would only confirm the alien fears of humanity and would assure our complete destruction. you have 24 hours.
what do you do to convince the alien race to spare our planet and save every person on it?
an alien race arrives on earth. their technology is far in advance of our own. any attempt at rebellion or warfare will quickly be put down, with little to no casualties or loss of assets on the side of the alien race.
the aliens can understand us perfectly. sadly, they have deemed humanity to be a destructive and violent force which should be stopped before spreading any further throughout the universe. they are one single day away from initiating the utter destruction of our planet. this isn't a decision they came to lightly.
suddenly- you are teleported to the alien mothership and granted an audience with their collective leader. the alien overlord is receptive to your presence however. the overlord will listen to anything you have to say, and will observe anything you wish him to. the overlord is easily killable, but such an act would only confirm the alien fears of humanity and would assure our complete destruction. you have 24 hours.
what do you do to convince the alien race to spare our planet and save every person on it?
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Since our death is inevitable, I'd save the alien species the guilt of the unknown about their decision to destroy us and kill the overlord. If we're screwed anyway, I may as well help as many individuals as possible.1
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We have bananas.8
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_har_T_Swallow wrote: »
and just reinforce that we torture other creatures for our own enjoyment? Not a chance when I can waste one of the ****ers.3 -
I'd give him a taco2
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I would agree with them. We are destructive. We're so destructive they don't need to waste their time or firepower because we're going to extinguish ourselves. We are nowhere near being able to colonize another planet, we don't stand a chance even getting there. If we don't seriously change our ways, we probably don't have enough time left on this planet develop the technology necessary for interstellar travel. However, if we do manage to change, we won't need to be destroyed and we could be allies. Their aggressive action would be redundant if we did poorly and cost them a friendship if were to do better in the future.5
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I debating what I should pack0
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FreyasRebirth wrote: »I would agree with them. We are destructive. We're so destructive they don't need to waste their time or firepower because we're going to extinguish ourselves. We are nowhere near being able to colonize another planet, we don't stand a chance even getting there. If we don't seriously change our ways, we probably don't have enough time left on this planet develop the technology necessary for interstellar travel. However, if we do manage to change, we won't need to be destroyed and we could be allies. Their aggressive action would be redundant if we did poorly and cost them a friendship if were to do better in the future.
You should look into books by Jared Diamond. You are 100% accurate with your 2nd and 3rd sentences.1 -
Carbkiller1970 wrote: »I debating what I should pack
If you are taking bananas might as well take a banana hammock.1 -
I'm trying to remember what Jean-Luc did.2
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Carillon_Campanello wrote: »Carbkiller1970 wrote: »I debating what I should pack
If you are taking bananas might as well take a banana hammock.
I'm female so I assume u mean the one that sits on the kitchen counter0 -
Carbkiller1970 wrote: »Carillon_Campanello wrote: »Carbkiller1970 wrote: »I debating what I should pack
If you are taking bananas might as well take a banana hammock.
I'm female so I assume u mean the one that sits on the kitchen counter
Yes. Bananas(the kind on the kitchen counter) are being tossed around the thread as a primary weapon of engagement.1 -
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Do we have intel that the aliens are primates of some sort?0
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I confess I didn't even read the entire thread intro0
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Carbkiller1970 wrote: »Do we have intel that the aliens are primates of some sort?
Nope. Bananas none the less. It's our best defense.0 -
U know what's funny at this moment I have 3 bunches of bananas on my counter left over from a picnic on Sunday and I'm leaving the country on sat just thinking today wth am I gonna go with all theses bananas. Lol true story2
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I would take him a baby and ask him to look into its eyes and see the innocence and potential for learning and ask them to have the compassion to help us rather than destroy us.
If that didn't work I would give him the bacon sandwich I am hiding behind my back because....well.....bacon
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Carbkiller1970 wrote: »U know what's funny at this moment I have 3 bunches of bananas on my counter left over from a picnic on Sunday and I'm leaving the country on sat just thinking today wth am I gonna go with all theses bananas. Lol true story
Take them to the mothership.0 -
Carillon_Campanello wrote: »Carbkiller1970 wrote: »U know what's funny at this moment I have 3 bunches of bananas on my counter left over from a picnic on Sunday and I'm leaving the country on sat just thinking today wth am I gonna go with all theses bananas. Lol true story
Take them to the mothership.
lol apparently I'm locked and loaded1 -
Question do I offer them the bananas or throw the bananas at them?0
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Someone hold my bananas the dryer just stopped brb0
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_har_T_Swallow wrote: »_har_T_Swallow wrote: »
and just reinforce that we torture other creatures for our own enjoyment? Not a chance when I can waste one of the ****ers.
you could catch and release though right? explain to him why humanity does such a little thing from time to time?
That just means the fish dies out of your sight. Seriously, the mortality rate for catch and release is like 95 %.3 -
If I am humanities last hope, youre screwed. I would have a few drinks and party it up. Ask to bring up a lady or two to enjoy the last 24 hours with. Hookers and blow. I think I would want to know more about them and the universe then trying to convince them not to kill us.1
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LiftingRiot wrote: »If I am humanities last hope, youre screwed. I would have a few drinks and party it up. Ask to bring up a lady or two to enjoy the last 24 hours with. Hookers and blow. I think I would want to know more about them and the universe then trying to convince them not to kill us.
Omg riot, here take the bananas your gonna need them
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LiftingRiot wrote: »If I am humanities last hope, youre screwed. I would have a few drinks and party it up. Ask to bring up a lady or two to enjoy the last 24 hours with. Hookers and blow. I think I would want to know more about them and the universe then trying to convince them not to kill us.
Go high end on the hookers. Maybe that's the strategy we need to save humanity. Go down in the history books as the Tojan Whor(e)s event.0 -
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