I think my coworker is trying to sabotage me

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13

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  • YearsWorthOfFAT
    YearsWorthOfFAT Posts: 210
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    I understand your feelings, but i don't think he's sabotaging you.
    He probably just wants to share some joy with you, and thought it wouldn't be horrible to offer you some cake, right?
    It's up to you wether you throw it away or eat it.
  • nyrina4life
    nyrina4life Posts: 196 Member
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    Just toss it if it causing you this much stress. I highly doubt he was trying to ruin your diet, and just wanted to share a simple little treat.

    Personally, I have found that if I deny myself the simple stuff, I'll eventually cave and go for something much worse. Completely depriving yourself is not good. I learnt that the hard way.
  • astrampe
    astrampe Posts: 2,169 Member
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    He's not sabotaging you. It's just a piece of cake he is sharing with his friend. Give it away or go into the bathroom and toss it in the trash. Nobody can sabotage us. We sabotage us. Other's may know that we are deiting, but that's out trip not theirs. They don't realize our limitations because they are ours not theirs. Lighten up on your friend and take charge darlin!

    This.....stop looking for excuses - if you don't want to eat it, throw it away - after you thought about being thankful for having a friend who wants to share HIS birthday with you...It's about him, not about YOU.....
  • MelsAuntie
    MelsAuntie Posts: 2,833 Member
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    He's trying to be nice. Just eat the damned thing. Make sure you log it.
  • Retiredmom72
    Retiredmom72 Posts: 538 Member
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    It is your choice. Me--I would move it aside and when it is break time, throw it in a trash can away from my desk. It was a thoughtful gesture. Remember to say thank you and then move on.
  • kelseyhere
    kelseyhere Posts: 1,123 Member
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    wait until he is gone and throw it away. i seriously doubt he's trying to sabotage you, more likely just trying to be nice. food is so deeply rooted with celebration in our culture, we think it's necessary to eat to celebrate.
  • Cheechos
    Cheechos Posts: 293
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    You sound kinda paranoid, OP. I'm pretty sure your friend wasn't trying to send you into paralyzing sugar dependency by offering you a tiny piece of birthday cake. On that note, I am also pretty sure that you're not going to magically gain a sugar addiction by eating said tiny piece of cake. If you already struggle with sugar addiction/BED, then throw the cake away. Nobody is going to die if you don't eat cake. Long story short: trust yourself and trust others. Diet sabotage is a real thing, but that doesn't mean everybody everywhere is bent on shoving sugar down your throat.
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,065 Member
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    I would package it up and take it home for my kids to enjoy. I'm not much of a cake person anyway.
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
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    All this stress over a piece of cake? Oh my.

    It really shouldn't be like this. There shouldn't be any food you are afraid of. It is .. just food.

    If you want to eat the cake, eat the cake. Count the calories and move on with life.

    If you don't want the cake, don't eat it. Toss it in the trash.

    People make WAY too big of a deal over food, people giving them food, etc. It shouldn't be like this (and really it isn't healthy!).

    If it were me, I would take a bite of the cake to see if it was good or not. If I am going to use calories on cake - it better be DELICIOUS cake and if it is not.... I toss it.

    No matter what choice you make as far as this piece of cake goes - please, try and calm down about food. You're leading yourself down a path of complete and total stress over something that isn't supposed to be stressful. Unhealthy food will always be out there and available, having an unhealthy relationship with it doesn't benefit you at all.
  • kerricolby
    kerricolby Posts: 232 Member
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    Why'd he only give you a small piece? I'd be more pissed abou that.
  • jmoliveson
    jmoliveson Posts: 40 Member
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    No one is sabatoging you, he is just trying to be thoughtful. Now, he may be testing you but being that you are on Myfitnesspal, you are working hard so If you decide to eat it you can work it off later. I love cake but I am selective with my sugar so you might want to only take a few bites.
  • nanimoose
    nanimoose Posts: 60 Member
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    Give the cake to someone else who is probably eyeing it up right now :-)
  • k9runner1963
    k9runner1963 Posts: 108 Member
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    He's trying to be nice. Just eat the damned thing. Make sure you log it.
    THIS!
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    There's nothing about cake that is going to ruin your weight loss...it's all about calories in vs calories out, not what you eat.
  • Dragonwolf
    Dragonwolf Posts: 5,600 Member
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    Men usually don't think that way. Eat the cake and enjoy it :)

    This.

    Women are generally the vindictive types. Men are more likely to just not get it (mainly because weight loss, in general, comes more easily to them). There are exceptions to the rule, of course, but never attribute to malice what can more easily be attributed to simple cluelessness. Not cluelessness at the fact that you're trying to lose weight, but cluelessness at the fact that you'd be so torn over eating a small piece of cake.

    It'd be one thing if he was constantly offering you candy and cake and donuts for no reason. It's a completely different matter of "hey, I had this big birthday party and thought you might like a piece of cake. I know you're watching what you eat, so I made sure to make it a small piece."

    As someone else mentioned, too, being terrified and stressed over eating a piece of cake (and thinking that your friend is sabotaging you because he brought you a piece of cake) is the beginning of orthorexia and is a sign that you're letting food control your life, instead of you controlling your food. Make a conscious, objective decision about what to do with the cake, and move on. No regrets either way. If you eat the cake, just fit it into the rest of your day, or eat a hair less tomorrow (or the next couple of days), or go for a little longer of a walk this evening.

    In the end, the stress that you're putting yourself through is doing more damage than just eating the piece of cake will.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
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    If he brings you one piece of cake on a special occasion, it doesn't really seem like sabotage to me.

    If you don't really want the cake, don't eat it. If your heart is begging for cake, eat a piece. One day isn't the end of everything, but you don't even have to eat the cake if you don't really want it.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
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    I would leave the cake on the desk...then accidently move something on the desk causing it to nock the cake off the desk and on the floor.

    opps~accident... shucks!

    Then the floor will smell like cake for all eternity! Torturous!
  • nvpixie
    nvpixie Posts: 483 Member
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    Seems to me he just wanted to include you, not SABOTAGE you. So, if you want the cake, eat it. If you don't, dump it in the trash. Simple as that.
  • mahanaibu
    mahanaibu Posts: 505 Member
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    Personnally, I would have eaten the slice of cake.

    1) They only serve cake in joyous occasions (birthdays, weddings, baptisms, etc.). To me, refusing cake is refusing the joy in life. But I have to admit I also have a sweet tooth, so I'd say anything to enable myself to have cake.

    2) I put a lot of effort in my weight loss journey. Which means that a single piece of cake isn't going to ruin weeks of effort. It will if I let it (let's say that one piece was so good, I indulge myself and selfishly eat the entire thing). But it won't cause I've worked a lot along the way on increasing my self discipline.

    3) I don't have to eat the entire slice.

    Oh, I really disagree with this. My parents were of the "It's just once a year" club. Problem is that things that happen just once a year happen CONSTANTLY. For my own birthday? Maybe. For everybody's birthday? no way. There are many, many ways to enjoy life, many ways to celebrate, and I'm all for being creative about inventing those and trying them out. From my personal perspective, part of the problem is when we think that refusing unhealthy, fattening food on a regular basis is somehow missing out on the joy in life. And not eating the entire slice is a big problem for a lot of us, though more power to you if it works for you.

    I don't think the guy was trying to sabotage you. I do think an appropriate response is, "thank you for being so thoughtful, I don't happen to be eating cake much these days." Having not said that and having the thing on your desk, the response that would be right for me would be to dump it. Preferably after dumping salt or salsa over it so I wouldn't try to dig it out of the wastepaper basket later!
  • eabettin
    eabettin Posts: 3 Member
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    As far as the cake goes: its cake, not poison. It was a gesture, not a habit. It’s all about moderation. I have lost 75 lbs in 24 weeks and I occasionally grab a piece of cake or take a small sample of a sweet. And OMG, I survived AND continued to lose weight.

    Eating is part of living and how much you eat is based on lifestyle and habit. At which point in your life are you going to say, “It’s OK to eat the cake?” If you are basing your diet on the way you live your life until you die, then you are depriving your friends, family, and most importantly, yourself of all the perceived good things in life that you have to woefully abstain from because you can never “eat that” again. After a while, you are going to be angry with yourself and your family and friends are going to feel insulted. Your diet will fail and your will turn into the tank you were trying not to be… and then you go on yet another diet.
    One other thing… Alcohol = High Calories is a bit of a misconception. It’s not the alcohol that has the high calorie count… it’s everything else that goes with it. So, the fact is you can take a shot of light or dark rum and put it in a glass of water with Fruit Punch Mio and the total calorie count is 64 calories. Hang a slice of fruit on the side, pop in an umbrella and, poof – you are part of the crowd not feeling like you are being deprived, and that becomes your social drink – like a diet coke and a Captain – 75 calories. Just don’t drink 10 of them!

    You are not on a diet – so get that out of your head… you have adopted a new lifestyle that makes you feel great and you enjoy life to the fullest. Because of that lifestyle, so your body will natural react by adjusting your body’s metabolism accordingly. Your body certainly adjusted accordingly when you ate badly and it will adjust accordingly when you eat well.
    So enjoy the cake and more importantly, enjoy the moment!

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